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Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
:synpa: 240

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Monkey Fracas
Sep 11, 2010

...but then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you!
Grimey Drawer

I would say that around them you should be... wary

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

quote:

Maintain direct eye contact and keep your chest and face pointed at the goose.

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)
grab the goose by the goose and just throw it away

Monkey Fracas
Sep 11, 2010

...but then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you!
Grimey Drawer
pretty ballsy of an animal with a long neck to attack a much big animal with the ability to just grab its dumb feathery neck

Tendai
Mar 16, 2007

"When the eagles are silent, the parrots begin to jabber."

Grimey Drawer
Usually I think goons overexaggerate but I have literally never been around a goose that wasn't a biting, hissing, territorial rear end in a top hat.

etalian
Mar 20, 2006

Tendai posted:

Usually I think goons overexaggerate but I have literally never been around a goose that wasn't a biting, hissing, territorial rear end in a top hat.

well during the nesting season they get even more crazy and territorial.

to add insult to injury Canadian geese aren't even tasty like pheasants or grouse.

Monkey Fracas
Sep 11, 2010

...but then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you!
Grimey Drawer
they do sorta redeem themselves when they attack children in the park, though

listen kid I told you not to go over there



ha ha yeah don't worry about it kid just got attacked by a goose

he got goosed




Could you even legally kill a Canada Goose; isn't there a migratory bird thing protecting them

Asiina
Apr 26, 2011

No going back
Grimey Drawer
The geese on the campus on my university weren't actually that bad most of the time as long as you weren't too close to their nests or their babies. They mostly just honk or hiss and then waddle out of the way. I've walked by hundreds of geese and never been attacked once. I think most people who get attacked are those who are afraid of them and show it so the goose charges them. Stupid university kids, you are bigger than a goose. If it tries to attack you kick its rear end.

I do feel for the geese sometimes though. The university tried to control the goose population though by oiling their eggs, which was always very sad. After testing whether the eggs were new or more mature, they would dip the newer ones in oil which clogs the pores of the egg and starves it of oxygen, killing the egg. If they destroyed the egg or took it away then the geese would just lay more eggs, so they'd have to then put it back, and the goose would sit on a nest of dead eggs for months.

The building where my office was was donut shaped and there was a courtyard in the middle that had some shrubs. All of our offices had windows facing this courtyard. A goose nested there one spring and we all had to watch the entire summer as she sat on her nest but none of her eggs hatched. It was very hot as well, so people would bring her containers of water. It was actually hard to watch.

Cowman
Feb 14, 2006

Beware the Cow





When I was in London I visited the Tower of London and spent a lot of time photographing the ravens that hang out around there. They're super loving friendly when you have food or a drink or anything they want. They also dug into trash cans for food. I was sitting watching a pigeon try and get into the raven's food. That pigeon kept on getting closer and closer and the raven was basically telling it to gently caress off but the pigeon didn't listen so the raven just tore a chunk of feathers out of the pigeon's neck. Apparently pigeons have small necks because there was a little blood but it was mostly feathers and the pigeon hosed right off. I've got photos of it, they're not great since the whole attack caught me by surprise.

Here's a link to the imgur album. Thanks to imgur's terrible new interface I can't figure out how post the small thumbnails.
http://imgur.com/a/EAfYi




The aftermath:


Don't gently caress with this:

Cowman fucked around with this message at 18:43 on Oct 1, 2015

Maldoror
Oct 5, 2003

by R. Guyovich
Nap Ghost


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helmeted_hornbill

Monkey Fracas
Sep 11, 2010

...but then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you!
Grimey Drawer

:v:

I.C.
Jun 10, 2008

That screaming bird is the tops, still, forever.
But let's not forget funny snow ravens.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gjgpenWavO8

I know I haven't.

I can't.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dWw9GLcOeA

baw
Nov 5, 2008

RESIDENT: LAISSEZ FAIR-SNEZHNEVSKY INSTITUTE FOR FORENSIC PSYCHIATRY

wtf it's like he's really trying to have a conversation

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1M8vei3L0L8

Fushigi Yuugi fansub
Jan 20, 2007

BUTT STUFF

Tendai posted:

Usually I think goons overexaggerate but I have literally never been around a goose that wasn't a biting, hissing, territorial rear end in a top hat.

so what theyre still huge dumb walking roasts

Cabrini-Green Tea
Aug 20, 2009

wheel in the sky keeps on turnin'

quakster posted:

imegine if bird learn to yell when still dino :pwn:

a confusing but entertaining post

Hometown Slime Queen
Oct 26, 2004

the GOAT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZrKvudS76Hg

You know what? Eat your corn.

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

Asiina posted:

At my old university they were everywhere. The school would block off exits to buildings for parts of the year because geese would take up nesting there and would attack. There was an official website attached to the university's site that tracked the nests.

Most of the time they just hiss at you, but they can get aggressive too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zy1kC4d1kyg

This dude needs to carry an umbrella. I was attacked by geese just like that this summer at work, but they backed off once I opened an umbrella and pointed it at them.

Wizbang
Jan 13, 2005

"Y...you...oh...okay. I'll...
I'll be here if you change your mind...
we can be space cowboys together later...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2q6utsksoFY

This bird sounds like an R2-series astromech droid (from Star Wars)

Fushigi Yuugi fansub
Jan 20, 2007

BUTT STUFF
nah dude i think you mistook it for data from star trek

Noxin of Shame
Jul 25, 2005

:allears: Our Dan :allears:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSM3x9G7eTQ

CatBlack
Sep 10, 2011

hello world
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifCmvLNQl3s

Maldoror
Oct 5, 2003

by R. Guyovich
Nap Ghost
talking budgies sound like small battery powered transistor radios

etalian
Mar 20, 2006

birds love weed too

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=leUti4arSOw

Asiina
Apr 26, 2011

No going back
Grimey Drawer

Wizbang posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2q6utsksoFY

This bird sounds like an R2-series astromech droid (from Star Wars)

He's even blue and white :3:

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zK10aJcOfF0

crows know how to kick back and relax

steinrokkan
Apr 2, 2011



Soiled Meat

Zzulu posted:

grab the goose by the goose and just throw it away

Seriously, geese are domesticated, hollow boned pussies. Your grandma likely spent her mornings leisurely holding a goose by the neck and force feeding it with dough balls. lol at anybody afraid of these weak rear end birds.

lo carb Lo Pan
Oct 8, 2004

hangman's comin

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ickzGMtREFk

Asiina
Apr 26, 2011

No going back
Grimey Drawer
I'm pretty sure if you killed the crow and cut it open it would be full of the souls of the damned.

That is a demon bird.

huskarl_marx
Oct 13, 2013

by zen death robot

Tendai posted:

Usually I think goons overexaggerate but I have literally never been around a goose that wasn't a biting, hissing, territorial rear end in a top hat.

this is exactly the opposite of my experience, the Canadian geese we get are incredibly polite and orderly, motherfuckers use crosswalks


i live in flyover country so I think if they stop anywhere but here in the capitol city they get shot at so they mind their manners

PantsandCola
Aug 17, 2013

you did good... you did good
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifCmvLNQl3s

Facebook Aunt
Oct 4, 2008

wiggle wiggle




steinrokkan posted:

Seriously, geese are domesticated, hollow boned pussies. Your grandma likely spent her mornings leisurely holding a goose by the neck and force feeding it with dough balls. lol at anybody afraid of these weak rear end birds.

You know people have grandmas born in like the 1960s now, right?

Jukeboxblues
Jul 29, 2015


Grimey Drawer

Finally the prophet has delivered us!

Nathilus
Apr 4, 2002

I alone can see through the media bias.

I'm also stupid on a scale that can only be measured in Reddits.

Angela Christine posted:

You know people have grandmas born in like the 1960s now, right?

poo poo, id bet some people have grandmas from the 80s at this point. The math comes close to working out.

Fojar38
Sep 2, 2011


Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia


also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->
birds are cool and good

Nathilus
Apr 4, 2002

I alone can see through the media bias.

I'm also stupid on a scale that can only be measured in Reddits.

Fojar38 posted:

birds are cool and good

What? No. I dont think anyone else is claiming this. Fun and crazy? Shure. Cool? Uhhhh... Good? Hahaha hell no. They're more evil than good really.

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless
Nah man I had a cockateil that was chill as gently caress and as goodly as a saint. Also funny to hold like an ice cream cone.

Nathilus
Apr 4, 2002

I alone can see through the media bias.

I'm also stupid on a scale that can only be measured in Reddits.

Sheep-Goats posted:

Nah man I had a cockateil that was chill as gently caress and as goodly as a saint. Also funny to hold like an ice cream cone.

Don't let them confuse you.

I've had 'tiels too and they were fun, easy pets. But never be fooled. They are not civic minded creatures.

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Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy
can we maybe get a separate general bird thread because the latest discussions in this thread havent really been interesting to the bird yelling into cup aficionados such as myself

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