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Pfox posted:A Let Thrones Beware Quickplay Adventure! Cool, I just went through this! This is from the perspective of someone coming to the quickplay adventure completely fresh - I didn't read all of your posts here yet. (Edit: okay, now I've read them, and some of my questions were answered, but it's still useful for you to know what my questions were from the perspective of a completely new person. It's not vital that all these questions get answered right away in a quickstart - you want the reader to have some questions so their curiosity keeps them reading - but some need answers.) A couple of quick notes: Most of the large text boxes have a line at the bottom saying "cite your source here" which you probably meant to delete or replace. The small text boxes with instructions like "To calculate your initiative, roll 1d6 and your Response score, then subtract one to reflect your heavy chain armour." have text that is too small. I couldn't read it without zooming in. Page 4: I wonder if this is going to let me make any choices? I hope so - I love Choose Your Own Adventures! Page 6: I wonder how combat really works? It didn't seem to matter whether I won or lost initiative - I beat the guy anyway. I wonder if that's just for the convenience of the quickplay or if that represents something in the game? Page 8: I wonder how these difficulties are set? 9 seems rather high - even with a strong ability score and my best skill I'm only 50-50. I wonder how I can improve my chances? ... One of the people I befriended/failed to befriend died? Which one, don't I recognize them? Page 9: Okay, I don't understand how combat works enough to know what to do here against the captain. Complete brick wall here. If I attack him and he interrupts me, that seems like it's worse than letting him attack and then I interrupt him... What is this momentum thing? My armor says resist 2 - what does that mean? If I literally resist 2 damage, how can he hurt me? What does it mean by the first move of each round? How many moves in a round? Page 10: Alright, forget the combat - I don't get it. Let's see what happens. Okay, well that's an ending, I guess. If you want people with no knowledge of your game to pick up the quickplay, you'll need to do better at explaining how combat works in a logistical sense. What choices do I have? When do I make them? Are there any limits on my choices? What do the things I wrote down earlier all mean? The ending is kind of a downer considering there seems to be only a one in six chance of getting a good ending. That's not really a big deal, but I think it'd be stronger if it planted the idea that the adventure might continue instead of just "you give up". Something like "You'll need to find another way in tonight under the cover of darkness." It'd be cool if you could include a couple of minor choices - choose how to respond to a person, or something - make it more interactive, even if it's still just a tutorial. Good videogame tutorials often give you some small, constrained choices. I don't want to come off as being too harsh here - I love this type of thing for a tutorial, and I think it's a great starting point, but you need to improve it before it can do what you want it to do. I don't think it'll be hard for you to seed some information about what kinds of choices you have in combat earlier, as there were a couple of combats that didn't explain much where you could explain a bit more before you throw folks into it for real. You've already done most of the work here, and if you just spend a little more time fixing it, you'll have a really cool and useful tool to teach people and get them into your game.
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Feb 26, 2016 06:55
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| # ¿ May 12, 2024 02:12 |
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