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chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Node posted:

Where can I find a summary of Star Citizen, Derek Smart, and how this whole debacle came to be?

I've always been ignoring the Star Citizen threads. I literally had no idea Derek Smart, Derek Smart, DEREK SMART! had anything to do with it until just now.

What if someone found a way to package and sell pure, unadulterated cognitive dissonance, free of any other product, delivered instantly over the internet, at a convenient sliding scale of prices?

Guess what?

Someone did.

Welcome to Star Citizen.

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chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Dapper Dan posted:

Don't forget the ten year ban for dissenting on a completely different forum. Or the hilarious connection to the failed Gizmondo which was a money laundering scam.

It truly is evergreen. It's the most magical thing.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Dapper Dan posted:

It really is. Also, make sure you use different forum names if you are a Star Citizen backer (lol, loving why) and post dissent otherwise they will ban you for a billion million years like Scientology contracts.

So you're saying, hypothetically, one could just register forum accounts with the names of Star Citizen backers, post post post and the backers would get banned?

Fascinating.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

pftc posted:

I've been talking with BoredDellTechnician.

Dolvak is no longer a moderator at r/DerekSmart.

I assume he wanted me to pass the message along.



lol and there's still a stickied thread about welcoming dolvak, their new mod

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

DOMDOM posted:

star citizen is just an elaborate troll to crowdfund SA back into relevance

croberts and DS are hired crisis actors

That is literally the only thing that would be greater than the current circumstances.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Skyl3lazer posted:

So I pledged 30$ in 2012 for a cool looking spaceship game what the gently caress happened

Do you know how if you get a lot of hydrogen together it ignites an explosion that will last a billion years radiating enough light and heat to power the wildest dreams of its brightest children? It turns out if you sell enough spaceship jpegs, the same thing happens, only the explosion radiates schadenfreude.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Maldoror posted:

The 93 million dollars is what they say they got.

Would they have any reason to lie? Could it be more or less than that, and would they have an advantage to lying about what they actually received from backers?

Well, hypothetically, if you had ties to some kind of organised crime syndicate in say, Sweden, you could take crime money and claim a backer gave it to you, creating fictional customers, then pay out salaries and dividends to crime syndicate members thus laundering the money. Since JPEGs are infinitely reproducible there is no physical production chain to trace and if you had lots of weird time limited sales and rapidly fluctuating prices you could really make the financials a horrific maze for a forensic accountant.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

kordansk posted:

You would have to be the biggest idiot to use kickstarter to publicly launder mon..... NEVERMIND.

Kickstarter, yeah totally moronic. You'd have to build your own crowdfunding platform that you'd have complete access to. Really be able to modify and host it yourself. You could even resell it to others. Just spitballing.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Karl_Ramseier posted:

I bought Line of defence yesterday and hell, that's a mess. I reported it to steam as scam and reported Steam/valve to the german " Verbraucherzentrale" for not pulling it out of EA.

lol watch out Derek the nazis are coming

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

$5 seems high, there are very good games that can be purchased for that, including the olly olly games which are both superior skateboarding games.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

the idea that a teenage cripple can't be a shithead is ableist and agist as gently caress imo

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

You know... if this stargur's bag is it doesn't do DMCA takedowns, doesn't that mean that it's no longer a safe harbour and thus is legally culpable for the content it hosts?

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Christ, if there's no upload limit then there's nothing stopping you from just piping /dev/random to it 😫

Why is everything related to this game dangerously incompetent garbage?

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

That script won't be executed at all, no matter how dumb their image poo poo is. It would need some kind of exploit to execute it. Also, it's insanely illegal and easy to trace and you just posted about it here, so you're currently CR level stupid.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Required Parachute posted:



haha, holy poo poo, they didn't even move ssh off of port 22. Aside from other things.

its hosted on digitalocean, a cloud hosting provider. they probably didn't set the server up. and the filesystem would be read-only anyway

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Incombibulator posted:

I loving hate the ubiquitous Bootstrap framework. It's lazy, lazy, lazy.

Whoa hold on there buddy. Bootstrap is ubiquitous and is in fact lazy, but it allows sperglord programmer/non-designers with no money to make something that's functional, compatible and well-proportioned. Pre-bootstrap all this poo poo would have been geocities-tier dross, barely functional all-flash sites or worse. It's The Big Issue of website designs: they're still homeless but at least they're approaching professional.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

AP posted:



"Let's say I am mildly interested in SC" Karl, seriously get help pretending to be your own kid and lying to complete strangers about a stupid "potential" game, is odd to say the least. This is not normal behaviour.

I think it's way more likely that Karl is pretending to be his dad, not the other way around.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Wait. I just realised something. This horrible community is endemic to all space games. Any space game anyone makes will be totally populated by these shitlords. There is no escape.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

A Neurotic Jew posted:

I see what you're saying, but part of the reason they are being such shitlords is because they've been scammed out of a lot of money, and the more money you put in to something the more you have to convince yourself it was a good idea. Less exploitative space games will probably have a lot of the same assholes but they probably won't be as wrapped up in their lovely space identity.

These are all active Eve players, they're all ED players, they play every space game with every second and cent. They're like an ocean, and Star Citizen is just a very deep sinkhole, but they're going to be everywhere, being this lovely, to everyone. If someone makes a better space game they'll buy that too and they'll be lovely to me when I want to play it, and people will think that I'm lovely for wanting to play it. There will be a small group of people who aren't lovely who they can call casuals and exploit but the primary market and the primary development focus will be these people. Space games are ruined forever.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

CAPTAIN CAPSLOCK posted:

yea but why not have a good dev make it?

yeah its clear that if anyone currently making spacegames should make that it's hello games, the no man's sky guys, who are predominantly ex-criterion guys

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Paladinus posted:

Okay.

Here's a coin with the Queen in her human and lizard forms.



Queen Elizardbeth rules

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

You know people in this thread often call the Star Citizen dream impossible for technical reasons, but I don't think that's the case. There are no real intractable problems that I've seen so far that couldn't be overcome theoretically. I think the real issue is its organisationally impossible, especially for Roberts. Huge scope needs a huge diverse workforce which gets exponentially harder to manage with each new member. You have to find a ton of people who are really passionate about a lot of really different things and then harness them properly. The director has to be some kind of management genius and a borderline polymath (and probably sociopath) themselves. Keeping that many people inspired, herded, without treading on anyone else's toes, that's where it gets impossible. That's the reason why so many indies have delivered so many more space games in the mean time: the management overhead for tiny teams is far easier to overcome. The only way I think something with the scope of Star Citizen could work is if it were like Minecraft, totally supported for free by talented sperglords who spend their lives on their own transforming the original kernel to something else entirely and shifting the burden of resolving conflicts to the end user.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

D_Smart posted:

I disagree. As a systems level engineer who has built massive games from the ground up, I can sum it all up to one word: CryEngine.

Other than that, yes, you are right. Star Citizen could be made - by the very same engineers there right now - if they built a custom engine for it. I outlined this in my now famous Interstellar Citizens blog.

I wasn't considering the choice of engine part of The Dream, but I suppose that's where audiences are at nowadays. But yeah, the insane limitations imposed by the incompetent management makes otherwise implementable ideas, well, pathological. And while I don't doubt that the engineers could build any system they were asked to build, I doubt there's a man alive that could wrangle them all, have them all building all these insanely stupid and diverse systems together in a cohesive manner, before the company fell apart.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

When they say that each episode is like its own game, they just mean in terms of development time and retail price.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

trucutru posted:

"No statements about incompetent traitorous rear end in a top hat leavers. They deserve privacy"

I think it might be more "No attention for incompetent traitorous rear end in a top hat leavers. They could have been legends like US, SAVIORS of PC gaming! Now history will forget them forever!"

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Ledenko posted:

Of course it's nonsense, but how can cro have his movie without mocap? As it stands, SC is full of capably made art assets that only work well as static objects because *someone* won't compromise.

Oh, I know how:

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

Derek can you explain quaternions to me

I don't get them

i'm not derek but quaternions are pretty simple, they're basically a more complex complex number

instead of just i, you also get j and k, any of which squared is -1, but the product of all of them is -1 too

end result you can have a single number to express four dimensions, much like with a complex number you can have a single number to express two

hth friend

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Man, Star Citizen's number of games it wants to be : number of games it is ratio is beyond belief.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Every time I read Vanduul I think of this guy

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.


don't ruin what is arguably the best part of open development by asking the developers to be open about their developments

-- The Definition of Awesome

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Scruffpuff posted:

I'm looking forward to the always-effective "petition" to bring back Star Citizen once this things finally collapses into rubble. No matter what the "MMO" (:lol:), and no matter how unpopular, there's always a small contingent of people who put boundless energy into bringing it back. The only thing funnier than Chris trying to make a game is his followers doing the same.

Actually thats the only chance Star Citizen has; if enough cultspergs get the assets and poo poo and full-on dwarf fortresses their dreams into buggy programmer-art life, for free, for years

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

There's only one explanation for thinking customer support qualifies as personal and confidential: that's the closest he's gotten to it. Any bulk mail that's personally addressed to him is a precious communique with his most trusted confidant. It's really sad.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

its true, star citizens require more immersion than your average gamer, and i'm glad they realise this

it's just a shame that they try and find it from games, rather than bathtubs

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Xaerael posted:

Dear newbies to the thread. We get you're here to hate on idiot star citizens, and dig your eagerness to mock a lovely community and a bad game. But sometimes people go overboard and say lovely things. Amongst these lovely things is hating on "batgirl" for being apparently trans. This isn't cool, and you're acting like a lovely redditor by doing so, and makes the thread look less like a comedic critique of a washed up has-been, who was given too much money, and more like a hatemongering platform for transphobic idiots.

As we've said many times before, hate the choices star citizens make, not the hand they were dealt at birth. Hating on trans folk makes you look like a moron who can't accept modern day science.

We're better than that. Don't lower yourself to reddit standards.

This was a public service announcment, please return to your regular scheduled parping.

wait barbara gordon is trans

wow, and people thought the she-thor backlash was bad

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

The French Army! posted:

Fill me in on this...stimpire. I can't read 500 pages of whatever it is this thread has become.

careful there buddy according to latest research, asking questions about the stimpire is punishable by having a small torture robot grafted onto the back of your skull that reaches around your head and strikes your temples with a futuristic glockenspiel hammer 24 hours a day to the stimpire anthem, which is a song engineered to make bowels bleed for three months

then after those months they give you a chemical that makes you permanently addicted to getting hit in the temples but then they lock your head in a space helmet that's impossible to remove

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.


real dogs tags are designed to identify bodies even if they're blown up to the point of being unidentifiable

a few scratches later these things will be unreadable

why wouldn't they do some kind of lucite thing

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Wait, I'm confused. Why are they recording sound when they could just engineer a state of the art acoustic simulation engine to make all sound as it happens, procedurally? It seems like that would be more immersive and authentic.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

D_Smart posted:

Because spending money on mocap is more beneficial. Or something.

Don't be silly, Derek Smart, that would imply that they don't have all the money they could ever need, that they are in some financial situation other than fully loaded with everything they need to properly realise the dreams of Chris Roberts and his fans. The only reason they wouldn't do things properly immersive and simulate sound from acoustic propagation in materials is if they were haemorrhaging cash and had to compromise realism because they were essentially hobos living on borrowed time in borrowed Porsches.

chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Scruffpuff posted:

Instead of choosing his backers, he chose himself. Anyone who's following this project from the beginning, and those who know Chris's history, knew this. He has been hands on with writing his godawful script, shooting cringe-inducing mo-cap scenes, and paying A-list actors enormous sums so he can pretend he's a director, and his wife can pretend she's an actress. Star Citizen proper may have been his cash cow, but he never really did know how to build it. So he put together a huge team and basically expected them to, but even that was hosed up by his constant meddling and persistent belief that he's a visionary. Other than that meddling, he's done absolutely jack and poo poo to help move the PTU along, aside from his ludicrous "10 For the Chairman" videos. His entire heart and soul has been in his little movie, and the faithful footed the bill.

He's justifying this betrayal with the narrative that the income from Squadron 42 will keep the development limping along long enough to fund more PTU development. This is ridiculous on the face of it, since nobody really cares about SQ42, and they never have. Even those who did care, are already getting the first part for free. Yet he's deluded himself into believing that his personal project will somehow enter the mainstream and redefine gaming, and bail him out financially.


I think you give Chris far too much credit. I don't think, from his actions and history, you can conclude that he considers himself the saviour of PC gaming. I think it's clear that he considers himself the next George Lucas. PC gaming is his fallback position, his safety net from which he can plot his strike at Hollywood. He always intended to force them to take them back by making an independent film of such magnitude and majesty that they will be forced to take him back and hail him as their king, their better in business, in storytelling, in technology and success. The original remake-of-wing-commander that was the original kickstarter was a biding time, gathering resources, a nice safe play, doing the last thing he was successful at. But the success of the kickstarter let him change up the timetable; that's the only thing that changed.

Ten hours of cutscenes is no game ever made. It is, however, about all the Star Wars movies, or all the Harry Potter films, or all the Lord of Rings films, or all of the good Star Trek films. That's who he thinks he is, and what he thinks he's making, and why he doesn't give a poo poo about anything else.

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chaosbreather
Dec 9, 2001

Wry and wise,
but also very sexual.

Scruffpuff posted:

If that's the case, then we may as well lock him in a rubber room now and be done with it. The only thing he was ever successful at was a game older than Sandi's profile pic. But for him to imagine that his cognitive abortion is fit for Hollywood? It's one thing for him to play pretend, and appease his worthless wife, it's quite another if he honestly believes in his heart that he's anything other than a grade-Z sub-hack.

He absolutely believes he is a misunderstood creative genius who has never had the support he needed to fully bloom.

If he knew he was a hack, and couldn't deliver, he would have never come up with any of the poo poo he does. He would never be able to convince anyone of anything; he is, after all, a terrible actor. If you think he knows acting I suggest you study his roles as director, and his choice in wives. His enthusiasm is genuine; he is the worlds greatest Chris Roberts fan. He really believes that he can make the greatest epic film saga of all time. He might know, at this point, he can't create the greatest game of all time, but he believes basically no-one who matters will care, after all, film is more 'important' than games; that's why he's trying to get back in. And when he's finally given the acclaim and riches he is entitled to, the game will basically take care of itself, by someone else, in another continent, so he can really focus on really locking down that Oscar.

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