- Wizard Master
- Mar 25, 2008
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I am the Wizard Master
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I don't like throwing accusations of fallacy around because it belies my secret atheism, but holy crap tautology ahoy.
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Nov 1, 2015 07:07
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 6, 2024 02:23
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- Wizard Master
- Mar 25, 2008
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I am the Wizard Master
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Interesting that many of the so called "classic" quotes so far have come from FYAD posters...
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Nov 1, 2015 12:38
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- Wizard Master
- Mar 25, 2008
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I am the Wizard Master
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1. Bubble Ghost – I would like to meet Bubble Ghost to ask him who he was when he was alive and how he died. I would like to ask him what death is like…is it painful…?
2. Bernard – You might say “nerd alert” but I think he’s sweet…possibly the most misunderstood of the crew..he has a lot of skills and he’s dedicated to discovering Truth through science, something I can really respect. If that makes me a tuna head…then so be it!
3. McGruff – I need to feel safe. I need to feel like I can be safe in my home. I need to be able to relax and feel comfortable when I’m in my own home. This is why McGruff will come.
4. John Rambo – Rambo is misunderstood by Authority but he always fights for what he believes in…one of the only true patriots out there. Rambo will never forget his home, America, is worth fighting for..worth dying for. He loves it that much. The thought of meeting Rambo is a little intimidating..all I want to say is “thank you.” I would love to be friends, but he never stays in one place for long..
5. Winnie the Pooh – Sometimes you just have to laugh, and this little fella brings me belly laughs by the barrel-full. In case you haven’t guessed…we will be serving “hunny” at our banquet 
6. Babs Bunny – She’s smart, funny, not afraid to speak her mind, not afraid of her sexuality…Babs is the kind of girl I’ve always wanted to meet..
7. Data – The “brains” of the operation, Data takes the cake and soars into the 21st century. If I could share even a fraction of his knowledge..it would be like a dream. He’s also very strong, physically.
8. Ash Ketchum – I believe he really is a Good Person. Ash is brave, sincere, kind, and he cares deeply about preserving the world of Pokemon. I’d love to ask him about his experiences as a Trainer..maybe borrow a pokeball or two to try a real life pokemon battle
9. Claudia Vorstein – A classic villainess, larger than life..bold and beautiful, living in extremes..I may not approve of her actions but I can respect her for living as loud as she wants to. You go girl! I guess there could be conflict between her and McGruff though…..
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10. Kimba – Simba who?! Kimba and I will meet in a dark corner to discuss his revenge against the House of Mouse…mwahahaha..nothing too serious though! All that we want is for Disney to finally give proper credit to Tezuka-san for his influence on The Lion King (which, all joking aside, is a fine film in its own right.)
11. Tron – Disney fan or foe? Aye yai yai Cardigan, which one is it? Now don’t get me wrong, I think some mistakes have been made in the past but I still stand behind most of the Disney catalog. Tron here, at #11, is a classic Hero from the days when the studio dared to dream a little bigger…or should I say smaller?! He lives on a microchip, for crying out loud! After dinner I’d love nothing more than to get digitzed and check out Tron’s groovy world up close and personal. Maybe I can defrag my hard drive while I’m there!
12. Ikari Shinji – What is the self? What is humanity? Why can’t human beings ever stop hurting each other?…? Shinji has a lot on his mind. He may not be the most courageous…he’s a tragic, flawed hero..more like you and I than any archetypal superman..but what he lacks in pure bravado he makes up for with his shining soul, his indomitable spirit. Shinji is human. That’s all Shinji can be. Ganbare, Shinji!
13. E.T. – It was pure coincidence that brought E.T. to Elliot’s house..or maybe it was fate. In my dreams, I am that boy cradling E.T. in my arms. I show him the ways of Earth…I am willing to become his only friend on this alien world..but it has to end. This Earth makes E.T. deathly ill…I will protect you, E.T., and I will find a way to save you…somehow.
14. Donkey Kong – The King of Swing himself! DK’s the real “party animal” of the bunch. He’ll swing on by just in time for dessert–banana splits! After a few chest-thumping rounds of Mario Party I’ll ask the real question: is Candy Kong available? Yow!
15. Marc Summers – When I saw Marc on Double Dare, I knew I wanted to be an emcee/comedian. That dream hasn’t come true…yet…but I understand he’s had some hardships in his life as well. I think we would have a lot to talk about.
16. “Weird Al” Yankovic – I can’t be fooled, Al. Grow back your mustache.
17. Sherman Klump – My family can get a little crazy..but is there a crazier family than the Klumps? We could burn the midnight oil trading stories about our nutty relatives, the fun times and the bad times…a complete portrait of a life, all the smiles and tears included.
18. Garfield – King of the fatcats! The Garfster and I go way back. It’s No Odies Allowed at our table and the special main course is lasagna! I think I would actually be really mad if he ate it all though. I know it’s what you might expect but I’m imagining it and it’s making me really angry for some reason.
19. Bart Simpson – Ignore the later seasons…early Bart was a kid with a lot of heart. Sure, he could stir up trouble, but he could also fall in love..cry genuine tears of heartbreak. When Bart fell down the well, I fell with him…hungry in the cold, wet dark, alone but clinging to life. When Sideshow Bob came for Bart, I knew what it was to beg for your life at the point of a knife..your parents helpless to stop it..seconds away from having your throat cut, your short life snuffed out too soon. When Bart conquered Kamp Krusty, his triumph was my triumph. With bare chest and warpaint on..he looked like a little God. He looked powerful, and I desired this power. I understood completely the hurt and rage he felt when his love for Laura Powers was brushed away like it was nothing. How women can treat boys like little nothings, like their hearts are simple playthings to be broken and discarded. There is pain, there is loss. There is the solace of revenge, there are wounds that can never be healed. We fall and skin our knees again and again. We get back up, wipe our faces clean, look towards the horizon. Bart is the spirit that overcomes. You can place his body in bondage but he will rise. You can beat him bloody but he will rise. Though the pain of life may twist his soul, Bart will not allow himself to be destroyed. He will Survive.
20. VICI -
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Jan 31, 2016 11:01
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- Wizard Master
- Mar 25, 2008
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I am the Wizard Master
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Most of these quotes suck poo poo to be honest.
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Feb 23, 2016 05:09
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Nov 1, 2015 07:07
