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Pillowpants posted:No, it's the Housing Authority. The group that oversees affordable housing and section 8 in each area. Please wear your shiniest pair of Jackboots to your first day
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Nov 5, 2015 20:36
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Start reading this now, don't look back. Good Luck
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Nov 5, 2015 20:49
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Nonsense posted:Start reading this now, don't look back. Put this right on your desk, propped up for all your visitors to see.
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Nov 5, 2015 20:57
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This poster loves police brutality, but only when its against minorities!
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Eliminate homelessness and protect the precariously housed in your city and I will build the statues for you. You have my sim city experience at your disposal.
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Nov 5, 2015 21:23
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Nonsense posted:Start reading this now, don't look back. I like to keep a copy of this on my desk for visitors  I live in California WAR CRIME GIGOLO fucked around with this message at 21:36 on Nov 5, 2015 |
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Nov 5, 2015 21:34
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Nov 5, 2015 21:36
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Nov 5, 2015 21:42
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Buy and play Cities Skylines. Put it in your expense account. You'll thank me later.
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Nov 5, 2015 21:50
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double nine posted:Buy and play Cities Skylines. Put it in your expense account. You'll thank me later. Keep in mind the unlimited money cheat does not work irl.
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Nov 5, 2015 21:55
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Leave this on your desk.
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Nov 5, 2015 21:56
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Nov 5, 2015 22:06
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Your official portrait should be a velvet painting of Elvis. I would have said dickbutt or goatse, but you've still got reelections to win.
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Nov 5, 2015 22:16
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double nine posted:Buy and play Cities Skylines. Put it in your expense account. You'll thank me later. He's working as the Housing Authority, not a traffic engineer.
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Nov 5, 2015 22:33
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Phone posted:He's working as the Housing Authority, not a traffic engineer. How can you manage housing without building/changing roads? Does not compute.
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Nov 5, 2015 22:58
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During at least one meeting have a poster with the DO NOT CUT BACK ON FUNDING thing, no matter what the subject of the meeting is.
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Nov 5, 2015 23:10
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Apparently one of the other people on the HA is the local Santa.
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Nov 5, 2015 23:18
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This is goddamn glorious and I hope you do well while thumbing your nose at literally everyone. yesssssssssssssssssss e: Pillowpants posted:Apparently one of the other people on the HA is the local Santa.
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Nov 5, 2015 23:20
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 your new office painting set
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Nov 6, 2015 01:07
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How were you informed that you had won?
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Nov 6, 2015 02:48
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Once you make it to the legislature, be sure to be found with a dead girl or live boy. Your duty as a goon.
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Nov 6, 2015 03:09
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Pillowpants posted:Apparently one of the other people on the HA is the local Santa. Does he have a real beard or is he a faker? If yes then try to get his rear end impeached.
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Nov 6, 2015 03:13
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crazy cloud posted:Title your post presidential memoir "Excelling Just for Goatse", with goatse pics in the final pages of your end chapter. fixed
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Nov 6, 2015 03:14
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There's only one picture you need framed in your office:
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Nov 6, 2015 03:18
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Mr Luxury Yacht posted:There's only one picture you need framed in your office: Replace the picture with your own for your reelection campaign
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Nov 6, 2015 03:56
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Make it your business card.
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Nov 6, 2015 04:32
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zeroprime posted:Make it your business card. YEEESSSS Prove a goon can function in a political office, you may inspire others. Do good works.
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Nov 6, 2015 05:46
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Hail Satan, the system works
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Nov 6, 2015 06:05
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I support the idea of simultaneously doing a really good job in this position and mocking the system. Also: zeroprime posted:Make it your business card.
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Nov 6, 2015 06:59
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Try to attach an earmark to literally everything that passes your desk that declares Stalin the city's official bird. Or take this seriously and make this the start of a beautiful political career. But above all, zeroprime posted:Make it your business card.
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Nov 6, 2015 07:19
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It'd be pretty engrossing if you were to abstract some of the problems you're hoping to tackle and run them by us like a poor man's Brain Trust. I suggest abstracting them because you probably don't want to make this thread something that your enemies would google up using your name, position, city, etc., if you even wanted to go that route Edit: Congratulations, btw, this is kind of amazing. Accretionist fucked around with this message at 08:49 on Nov 6, 2015 |
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Nov 6, 2015 08:46
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The only things I hope you do: 1.) A good job, a do right by your constituents. 2.) Keep us posted. #1 is by far more important.
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Nov 6, 2015 08:53
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This is badass, I am a lesser man and would use that power to do good things to cover up the fact that I would relentlessly crush that dude's family into irrelevance. Cause seriously, gently caress that guy, a civil society does not need pieces of poo poo like him.
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Nov 6, 2015 10:22
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I looked up "pillowpants" on Altavista and only found references to Clerks 2. Please have your social media search guru fix this egregious oversight.
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Nov 6, 2015 11:26
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Awesome. 
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Nov 6, 2015 12:01
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Coatlicue posted:How were you informed that you had won? I called the city clerk. She said she's sending out an official letter today for me to accept.
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Nov 6, 2015 12:14
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Pillowpants posted:I called the city clerk. She said she's sending out an official letter today for me to accept. Demand an inauguration parade. Failing that perform your own swearing in at city hall with a mannequin dressed up to look like John Roberts and recite the Presidential Oath of Office.
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Nov 6, 2015 12:22
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Crain posted:Demand an inauguration parade.
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Nov 6, 2015 13:46
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The
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Nov 6, 2015 15:22
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Phone posted:The This is a really great thread, do keep us posted and share your frustrations, I'm really curious to have an insider's view into one of these elected positions that pretty much have no parallel in most other countries (elected officials higher up in the chain would appoint them, or there'd be a civil service procedure).
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Nov 6, 2015 15:53
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I just want to reiterate how funny/weird it is that we have a thread covering a real, live "Kid President" situation. PillowPants: You should starting thinking about which actor you want to play you when Netflix ends up buying the rights to this.
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Nov 6, 2015 16:13
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