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Happy Landfill
Feb 26, 2011

I don't understand but I've also heard much worse
"Unbelievable! You, [Subject Name Here], must be the pride of [Subject Hometown Here]."

"Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an 'unsatisfactory' mark on your official testing record... followed by death. Good luck!"

"In dangerous testing environments, the Enrichment Center promises to always provide useful advice. For instance, the floor here will kill you - try to avoid it."

"As part of an optional test protocol, we are pleased to present an amusing fact: The Device is now more valuable than the organs and combined incomes of everyone in [Subject Hometown Here]."

"While it has been a faithful companion, your Companion Cube cannot accompany you through the rest of the test. If it could talk - and the Enrichment Center takes this opportunity to remind you that it cannot - it would tell you to go on without it because it would rather die in a fire than become a burden to you."

"You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any test subject on record. Congratulations."

"Assume the party escort submission position or you will miss the party."

....God, this whole game really. But that's probably cheating.

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Happy Landfill
Feb 26, 2011

I don't understand but I've also heard much worse

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