Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
Germstore
Oct 17, 2012

A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time
>realize you may have overreacted

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Hogge Wild
Aug 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Pillbug
> get on his mallcop bike and go on a quest to find your mistress

Worldshatter
May 7, 2015

:kazooieass:PEPSI for TV-GAME:kazooieass:



>call the escape helicopter

Uxzuigal
Jan 16, 2013

Chill Berserker Dude
>teabag the dead guard, after all you are a gravetrobber...

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins
>seduce dead body of guard in bugs bunny-like fashion

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Germstore posted:

>realize you may have overreacted


As you die violently in a hail of police gunfire, you reflect that shooting the mall cop may have been an overreaction. Oh well, when you respawn you'll just

Uxzuigal posted:

>Turn on roguelike mode

Oh. poo poo.

Returning to default perspective

You are now Knockers McPawg again, and you seem to have gotten yourself into a bit of a pickle.

Knockers McPawg is not in roguelike mode

Uxzuigal
Jan 16, 2013

Chill Berserker Dude
>Spot your grandmother: Lara Croft

ANIME IS BLOOD
Sep 4, 2008

by zen death robot

Applewhite posted:


As you die violently in a hail of police gunfire, you reflect that shooting the mall cop may have been an overreaction. Oh well, when you respawn you'll just


Oh. poo poo.

Returning to default perspective

You are now Knockers McPawg again, and you seem to have gotten yourself into a bit of a pickle.

Knockers McPawg is not in roguelike mode

> Reach out and grab your own foot above you

Hogge Wild
Aug 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Pillbug
> shoot your guns left so that the recoil will push you to the right

EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
> Attempt zero gravity twerk

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

ANIME IS BLOOD posted:

> Reach out and grab your own foot above you


You grab your own foot. You're not sure how this helps.

Hogge Wild
Aug 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Pillbug
> pull your self up from your bootstraps

Dogstoyevsky
Oct 9, 2012

If there is no Dog, everything is permitted

Hogge Wild posted:

> shoot your guns left so that the recoil will push you to the right

Do this to get out, then

> defecate into portal loop, then fire guns vertically into portal loop, creating a perpetual hail of feces and bullets as a trap for those who might follow you here

Uxzuigal
Jan 16, 2013

Chill Berserker Dude

Dogstoyevsky posted:

> defecate into portal loop, then fire guns vertically into portal loop, creating a perpetual hail of feces and bullets as a trap for those who might follow you here

>while still in the portal loop, respawning until glitch

Saint Isaias Boner
Jan 17, 2007

hi how are you

Hogge Wild posted:

> pull your self up from your bootstraps

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Hogge Wild posted:

> shoot your guns left so that the recoil will push you to the right


You fire to the left. The recoil of your shots pushes you ever so slightly to the right. Luckily, you have unlimited ammo and it only takes thirty or forty shots to push you clear of the portal loop.



Dogstoyevsky posted:

Do this to get out, then

> defecate into portal loop, then fire guns vertically into portal loop, creating a perpetual hail of feces and bullets as a trap for those who might follow you here



You pull down your pants and defecate into the portal. Your butt is very big, so you're able to poop a lot.


You step back and nod with satisfaction at a job well done.The space between the portals is a veritable waterfall of poop, undigested peas and spent shell casings. You're also glad to have finally dislodged the Choco Bar. Too bad about your sunglasses, though. They're still stuck falling forever and now they're covered in turds.

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005
I'm honestly at a loss as to what to do next.

ShaqDiesel
Mar 21, 2013

VendaGoat posted:

I'm honestly at a loss as to what to do next.

>go west

Hogge Wild
Aug 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Pillbug
> go right like this:

Emmideer
Oct 20, 2011

Lovely night, no?
Grimey Drawer
>active cheat mode, type SATANSBUTTHOLE

Dogstoyevsky
Oct 9, 2012

If there is no Dog, everything is permitted
Man I hope we find the portal gun at some point so we can fling that mess at someone.

Uxzuigal
Jan 16, 2013

Chill Berserker Dude

jon joe posted:

>active cheat mode, type SATANSBUTTHOLE

EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
>Jump back in the portals to bathe in your excrement

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

VendaGoat posted:

I'm honestly at a loss as to what to do next.

This your first rodeo?

>pick up edge of orange portal

Uxzuigal
Jan 16, 2013

Chill Berserker Dude

EorayMel posted:

>Jump back in the portals to bathe in your excrement

+
>active cheat mode, type SATANSBUTTHOLE
and:
>absorb with satans butthole, store for later use.

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

Outrail posted:

This your first rodeo?

>pick up edge of orange portal

No.....no. Just stunned into a deference, at the thought of an infinite fecal cascade.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:
Throw in a water mill and we've solved the energy crisis. A poopmill I guess

Uxzuigal
Jan 16, 2013

Chill Berserker Dude

VendaGoat posted:

No.....no. Just stunned into a deference, at the thought of an infinite fecal cascade.

Scat Porn Heaven! Throw in some floating bratwursts and you are good to go.

ShaqDiesel
Mar 21, 2013

Uxzuigal posted:

Scat Porn Heaven! Throw in some floating bratwursts and you are good to go.

Concept art #2

Loving Africa Chaps
Dec 3, 2007


We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.

>walk left

Saint Isaias Boner
Jan 17, 2007

hi how are you

> re-enter the portal

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

jon joe posted:

>active cheat mode, type SATANSBUTTHOLE




Uxzuigal posted:


>active cheat mode, type SATANSBUTTHOLE



You type in the cheat code: SATANSBUTTHOLE.


Rocket rear end cheat activated!



As you are facing West you have little choice but to fly in that direction.


EorayMel posted:

>Jump back in the portals to bathe in your excrement


That happens, too...


Before you can stop yourself, you fly tits-first into the wall spike trap you'd successfully avoided earlier. Your limbs spasm wildly as post-mortem ragdoll physics take over.

Restarting at last checkpoint.

Looks like you're in quite a pickle. On the bright side, at least you got your shades back.

Loving Africa Chaps
Dec 3, 2007


We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.

>examine pillar

Emmideer
Oct 20, 2011

Lovely night, no?
Grimey Drawer
Oh drat the Gamefaqs guide lied to me!

Okay okay, I pulled up a new guide, it says to:

>Activate cheat mode, type BANANABROWN

EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
>Hop across the pillars to make progress

Emmideer
Oct 20, 2011

Lovely night, no?
Grimey Drawer

EorayMel posted:

>Hop across the pillars to make progress

What the gently caress is your PROBLEM?!

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Elsewhere, Butler O'Moustache is puzzled to find himself alive again.

EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.

Applewhite posted:


Elsewhere, Butler O'Moustache is puzzled to find himself alive again.

>Realize the stove was left on as you were making salmon patties
>Cut to house in the process of burning

Emmideer
Oct 20, 2011

Lovely night, no?
Grimey Drawer

Applewhite posted:


Elsewhere, Butler O'Moustache is puzzled to find himself alive again.

>Give into your inner evil, becoming the true and final boss of this CYOA with which to oppose Knockers McPawg, for you know that so long as she lives you will always be trapped in this hellish sub-reality in which your choices are not your own.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Uxzuigal
Jan 16, 2013

Chill Berserker Dude
> /no-clip - fly into lava

  • Locked thread