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Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Splatmaster posted:

-Never say "umm"

And on that note, a lot of people make this mouth clicking noise every time they start a new thought. It drives me absolutely loony, and if someone's doing it on a youtube video or something I will 100% stop watching just because of that noise. It's common enough that I can predict when it's going to happen.

I dunno if that's just me who it bothers but I have a thing about mouth noises. My mother started doing this thing where she sucks in air through her front teeth and it's gross enough I don't even want to speak to her anymore. But fart around me all you want I don't care.

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Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
If your nervous about speaking though, honestly the best fix is just to be super familiar with whatever you're speaking about and prepare appropriately. If you're an expert on the topic, then it's easier to be more relaxed and fall into a groove. Public speaking is terrifying, but 90% of the battle is in your mind. Once you get over your fears, then the rest is just speaking clearly and not rushing so that people can understand you better.

And on that note, never read off your powerpoint slides. All it does is tell the audience that you're not prepared and you don't know enough on the topic on to gab. Make sure you prepare a bunch of talking points beforehand, but if you read off of a script it won't feel organic. I have two eyes and a 2nd grade education, I already read your slides before you even started talking. Tell me something I don't know.

Renegret fucked around with this message at 14:48 on Oct 23, 2018

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
Why does the tip of my finger hurt today. I woke up like this.

I hope my skeleton isn't trying to escape.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I do have a bone saw but I'm concerned that putting a hole in my hand would make it even easier for my skeleton to escape.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Luvcow posted:

*a group of children are dismembering the corpse of a kid from the school newspaper they accidentally killed when one of them looks up, points and laughs* "haha! jimmy's using a 2015 model bone saw!!"

*jimmy sheepishly stops sawing and looks to the ground as he meekly replies* "it's my dads old one... my parents won't buy me my own until I'm older..."

jimmy loving deserves it for using a Windows saw.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

good dog

all dogs are good

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I only got one trick or treater last night so I gave her a ton of candy and some rice crispy treats I was saving for myself

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
by saving I meant I bought a 60 pack from Costco so I have more than enough

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

alnilam posted:



Never forget

I'm hungry

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
hello

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

that was a good joke ya made a few pages back

I really appreciated it

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I feel kinda bad because I can't remember who made my AV. I have no artistic talent so some wonderful people stepped up and gave it a go. It's absolutely perfect.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
it was some dumb toxx for a politics man

Hello, BYOB. I want to go home.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Luvcow posted:

theres always the "have no shame" never fail approach of declaring that you have explosive diarrhea

I have 3 PTO days to use before the end of the year so I already planned to take off next Thursday/Friday then the following Friday as well.

I'm playing the long con here.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
My boss may be a piece of poo poo but the one good thing about him is that he never asks us why we're calling out. There's no point, as long as we have the time he can't deny us.

He also knows that if he asks me he's going to get a fabricated story about liquids explosively spewing out of both ends.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

hamjobs posted:

a dude is trying to talk me into leaving my long-time boyfriend (over a year and some months now) because said dude decided we're bad for each other and "neither one of you are getting better."

buddy, don't be the person i cut out of my life for being a gross 58 year old dude telling me what to do. especially when you barely know either one of us.

lol he wants to be your sugar daddy

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
Good morning everyone.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I'm horribly behind on xmas gifts and I'm not sure what I should do

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
happy holidays friends

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
mornin'

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
hey everyone

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I have a job interview tomorrow.

But I'm so emotionally exhausted I just look at it as an inconvenience preventing me from going home and I'm having trouble getting into it.

But I'm emotionally exhausted because of my job so I'm stuck in a cycle.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Twenty Four posted:

Heya friend, I've missed ya!

I missed you too boo boo

and a collective you as well

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I have an interview after work today.

There's a hole in my pants right between the legs

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I ran to CVS on my lunch break, got a mini sewing kit and patched it in the bathroom.

Operation contain the sack is a success.

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I gotta call my mom and thank her for teaching me how to sew when I was a teenager

Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
I have a very good mother who is very nice and gave me a nice upbringing.

But drat can she be overbearing at times so I try to limit my contact to once a week for my own sanity.

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Renegret

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Heather Papps posted:

oh also i think i saw you postin in the work thread in the ccc, and it has really made me laugh how that thread is more byob then many threads these days, in that it's a lotta one liners and short jokes.
it's been nice seein' folk come to mainline yob for posts!

ya I do work crew a lot

I don't go into BYOB that much because I can't keep up and I'm not all that funny but I still like to say hi from time to time

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