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I shat myself in a very public way. Kuta Beach, before noon. Staying at a bungalow just of Poppies I, near the beach. I'm an early riser, and had been surfing for a couple of hours. Coming in, I stopped at a 7-11 to check my email (this was 2003). After a few minutes, I got the loose feeling in my gut, which soon began to clench. I stepped out to walk back to my bungalow, but not in time. On Poppies I, in broad daylight, wearing board shorts and sandals, I had explosive anal leakage. I heard "Whoa-ho-ho" in an Australian, female, accent. Utterly befouled, I slunk back to the bungalow, where my girlfriend said "Why'd you poo poo yourself?" upon seeing my state. I've also poo poo myself in Marrakech, Beirut, and Montevideo. The Bali making GBS threads was the most ignominious.
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Mar 8, 2016 04:55
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| # ¿ Apr 30, 2024 17:07 |
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It all involves making GBS threads, doesn't it? I took the short (less than an hour) flight from Hyderabad to Mumbai a couple of years ago. It was an early morning departure, and I had some sambal and idli for breakfast at HYD. Right at the point where we began the descent my gut shifted. You know that moment when you realize that your will have Loose Motions, as the Indians call it. I figured it hold out until the airport, although things became increasingly dire. It was an old-school deplaning, with the stairs and a bus to take us to the terminal. I nearly ran behind one of the landing-gear wheels to let loose, but security is really tight at BOM, and cops wouldn't let me wander the tarmac. I was increasingly panicked, and resigning myself to making GBS threads my pants of the airport tarmac. Miraculously, I held on for the bus ride to the terminal, dashed into the first men's room (fetid) I saw, and let loose. Explosively. It was good thing it was an Indian airport bathroom, because otherwise I would've been mortified by the mess I created. My gut was terrible for the entire long weekend I spent in Mumbai. Eventually, I decided the the Novotel bathroom in Juhu was adequate, and staked out a table there. Spent the afternoon drinking beer and eating bananas, and hit the bathroom there seven times in a few hours. Thank heavens for the rear end gun in Indian toilets, because I would've wiped myself raw otherwise. LA FIN
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Dec 22, 2016 21:54
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I LIKE COOKIE posted:immodium is a lifesaver when you have the shits. your stomach will still hurt and you'll have the most wicked smelly farts of your life, but at least you wont poo poo your pants. Just don't go overboard and eat a whole pack everyday like a girl I know, 2 weeks of no making GBS threads= blood when its finally time. I always travel with Immodium, but haven't had to use it in years. It's a life-saver if you have a long flight or bus ride or train ride with bad diarrhea. Otherwise, no way I'll take it.
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Mar 9, 2017 19:15
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