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This poo poo: Belvita "breakfast bicuits" They have an ad blitz at 24 hour fitness, complete with free samples and audio ads. "Breakfast biscuits" that give you "energy." Any dumb gently caress can see that they're "cookies." In case you're wondering, here is the nutrition label:  Flour, oil, sugar. It's a cookie for breakfast.
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Mar 20, 2016 05:17
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cyberia posted:That stuff was my go-to booze when I was a teenager. I would drink maybe a quarter of the bottle straight then top it up with red cordial syrup so I could drink the rest of the bottle Just the thought of this alone makes my stomach turn over in fear / disgust.
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Mar 20, 2016 15:36
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Speaking of gross poo poo. Have you ever wanted to mix the delightful flavor of red-flavored cough syrup (come on, it's not actually "cherry" or "strawberry" or even more than like 1% loving fruit at all most of the time) with straight cheap vodka? Because I didn't. If anything the flavor alone was enough to give me five hours of energy from how revolting it was. Don't get me wrong, it worked as far as energy goes, but holy gently caress "great tasting" is a flat-out lie to anyone who isn't a raccoon or goat.
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Mar 21, 2016 07:59
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In general I don't like 5 hr. energy because your body needs hydration to work better. That's the basic thing that coffee and soda pop have over it. You could drink water with it, but that defeats its own purpose. Eien Ni Hen posted:Edit: While I'm on the subject of coffee, I hate bottled/canned coffee drinks (with the exception of cold brew) because they usually have a ton of sugar in them. I want actual iced coffee, not a caffeinated milkshake. Monster Java Vanilla Light might work for you; 100 calories per can, and not as thick. The other Java Monsters taste like chocolate milk, but apparently those drinks weren't even thick and sweet enough for some people, since Monster now makes an "Energy Shake" which is thick and designed to be like a milkshake. I'm a sweettooth fatty and even I don't like these. They taste like slim fast.
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Mar 21, 2016 15:15
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Ema Nymton posted:In general I don't like 5 hr. energy because your body needs hydration to work better. That's the basic thing that coffee and soda pop have over it. You could drink water with it, but that defeats its own purpose. I don't usually take it either but I've had really bad insomnia lately, and I wanted to try and stay up the whole day so I could fall asleep easier the next night, so I kind of went "why not" and pounded one for the first time. Worked like a charm in spite of the loving flavor. Seriously, anything remotely close to vodka makes me gag. Also, coffee makes me piss my weight in water so I usually have to drink about the same amount of water (maybe a bit more) to rehydrate.
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Mar 22, 2016 12:09
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nocal posted:This poo poo: Speaking of bullshit breakfast crap: Here in Australia a bunch of companies have started using some retarded "Health Star Rating" thing to inform consumers about how healthy their products are.   4 out of 5 health stars! 26% sugar! What the gently caress do these "health stars" even loving mean?
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Mar 22, 2016 13:09
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nocal posted:Flour, oil, sugar. It's a cookie for breakfast. And yet, they still taste like an actual wheat rear end in a top hat.
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Mar 24, 2016 13:28
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Aquatic Giraffe posted:I briefly signed up for that one since my dog is a toy destroyer and I was buying new ones monthly anyway. I had to cancel fairly soon after because it's one lovely toy that lasts like an hour, tops, before filling your house with stuffing and 5 bags of garbage treats. I ended up throwing away 3/4 of the box's contents every month, they even included "treats" once that had ingredients that are actively toxic to dogs. I'd sign up for a monthly dog killing subscription box.
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Mar 24, 2016 15:41
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Hummingbirds posted:And yet, they still taste like an actual wheat rear end in a top hat. Because if it tastes bad, it must be healthy! *note, some healthy things are loving delicious, such as chicken, oranges, grapes, carrots, and pomegranates!
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Mar 27, 2016 19:19
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Eien Ni Hen posted:Seconding this one. My in-laws have a Keurig they paid way too much for, and it makes average tea/coffee at best. I don't understand why people want such an expensive, wasteful machine when a Mr. Coffee is cheaper and easier to use. I got a non-drm one and reusable cups because I'm the only one drinking the coffee and Starbucks Via was too expensive
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Mar 27, 2016 19:38
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wayne curr posted:Speaking of bullshit breakfast crap: Good for your health: keeps starvation away!
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Mar 27, 2016 19:45
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Ema Nymton posted:I hate Keurig coffee machines. I hate that they make fake coffee, the cost, the k-cup waste, the insult that they tried to put DRM on /loving coffee/, but most of all I hate that everyone seems to love them. There are cheap stickers for Keurig 2.0 machines that bypass the DRM, or use the the foil top of a 2.0 pod, tape it on whatever pod your heart desires, and should work as normal (you might need to rotate the pod a few times to get it to read). Hack the planet. We truly live in the cyberpunk hellhole we deserve.
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Mar 27, 2016 20:21
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dumb. posted:Actually Sensodyne Repair & Protect is the loving shiz if you can find it. The Novamin poo poo they put in it is insane new medical technology science stuff that's supposedly going to change the dental game for hardcore real: I was fuckin' stoked to find this freshly stocked at the store and then pissed as hell when I saw that the entire new product line contains sodium lauryl sulfate 
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Mar 30, 2016 21:06
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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:I was fuckin' stoked to find this freshly stocked at the store and then pissed as hell when I saw that the entire new product line contains sodium lauryl sulfate Canker sores every day or amazing teeth. Choose one. Edit: After looking in to it a bit, Fluoride still works better, you're not missing out. Ball Tazeman has a new favorite as of 22:03 on Mar 30, 2016 |
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Mar 30, 2016 21:59
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teen witch posted:There are cheap stickers for Keurig 2.0 machines that bypass the DRM, or use the the foil top of a 2.0 pod, tape it on whatever pod your heart desires, and should work as normal (you might need to rotate the pod a few times to get it to read). Hack the planet. Thankfully literally everything is technically hackable, take it from a guy who went to college for comp sci. Like, yeah, you can try to cover your tracks, but once somebody figures out how your code's put together or unscrambles the poo poo you're using to obfuscate memory, you can do whatever you want because it's your machine now, in a way.
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Mar 31, 2016 06:51
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gently caress this stupid planet where you gotta hack your loving coffee maker
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Mar 31, 2016 07:48
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I have a Keurig, I don't use the pods though I have a refillable one. I used to have a really nice coffeemate single cup brewer but it was a loving mess, broke all the time and was very prone to molding. The Keurig on the other hand has been going for like 3+ years and never had a hiccup. And having the cups is sometimes nice because it lets me make single cups of decaf when the grandparents come over.
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Mar 31, 2016 09:13
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Wanamingo posted:
The baking soda isn't there for flavor, it's good for ya teef and gums. I switched to baking soda toothpaste a few years back and it really helped stop my gums bleeding. I figure trying to mask it with mint just makes it taste even more vile. You get used to the taste within a week or two and then it becomes pleasant enough. HMS Boromir has a new favorite as of 18:29 on Apr 13, 2016 |
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Apr 13, 2016 18:27
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Came here just to hate on stupid coffee pods. Their existence isn't as infuriating as its popularity. It seems every middle class boomer just HAS to have one or they aren't middle class enough.
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Apr 13, 2016 18:37
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teen witch posted:There are cheap stickers for Keurig 2.0 machines that bypass the DRM, or use the the foil top of a 2.0 pod, tape it on whatever pod your heart desires, and should work as normal (you might need to rotate the pod a few times to get it to read). Hack the planet. I just solve that problem by having an old fashioned, regular, boring old coffee maker. Put water in the top, a filter and some coffee in the basket, and put the bot underneath. Push a button, wait a few minutes, hey there you go a hot pot of lovely coffee! Granted I can justify making entire pots because I drink a pot a day but y'know. I hate Keurigs but I've also been bitching about coffee machines for at least a decade. It seems like every time one of mine finally craps out I have to navigate an entire drat aisle of fancy coffee machines with useless extra bullshit stapled on when I just want a basic, simple coffee machine. This was even before Keurigs; it also made shittier machines that made shittier coffee. It doesn't need a clock. A timer is convenient but it seems you can't find one with a timer that doesn't also have a bajillion other things like precise temperature control, an extra spout, an attachment for a very specific type of travel mug, or a self-cleaning mechanism that never works right and makes the coffee taste bad. The more stupid bullshit they put on it the less time it lasts, I've noticed. People that buy fancy coffee makers seem to be unable to go a year without it breaking. The one I have right now I've been using for 8 years. I bought it for $15. It doesn't have a clock. It only has one button. It's a machine. That makes coffee. Then it keeps it hot until I turn it off. Nothing else. That's all it does. It's mostly made of plain white plastic and it's loving fantastic.
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Apr 13, 2016 20:29
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ToxicSlurpee posted:The more stupid bullshit they put on it the less time it lasts, I've noticed. People that buy fancy coffee makers seem to be unable to go a year without it breaking. The one I have right now I've been using for 8 years. I bought it for $15. It doesn't have a clock. It only has one button. It's a machine. That makes coffee. Then it keeps it hot until I turn it off. Nothing else. That's all it does. When that one finally bites it, do what I did buy one on the cheap from a hotel or motel when they renovate. Those things are nearly invincible, and they also only have one button/switch 
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Apr 13, 2016 20:43
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Thrift shops are also great for coffee pots, just plug it in at the store to make sure it turns on. Thrift shops are probably the best place for kitchen stuff in general, tbh, because people get rid of perfectly good, even great stuff the minute they get something new. I've scored stuff by Bodum, Williams-Sonoma, Le Creuset, and Wusthof, not to mention piles of indestructible vintage Pyrex and cool old cocktail things. You do, however, have to root through piles of George Foreman grills and As-Seen-on-TV crap to find the good stuff. There's been an Egg-Stractor gathering dust on the shelf of my local Good Will for like a year now.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:09
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Hey, George Foreman grills can be really useful, I use mine all the time. The weird thing they are good at making is tater tots.
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Apr 13, 2016 23:19
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I can defend coffee pots with timers if you're the sort of person who sets it to get fresh coffee when they wake up. Any more than that is serious overkill, and you should have an old indestructible plain Mr. Coffee for when that breaks/your weekly Lutheran bible study. Most of the stuff I hate is Hamilton Beach products. There's a knockoff Kureig made by HB at my office and I've never once seen it used without water going everywhere. It was used for a little while to make hot water but the new coffeepot has a water heater so I'm not sure what that HB pile of poo poo is still doing here.
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Apr 13, 2016 23:34
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Crow Jane posted:Thrift shops are probably the best place for kitchen stuff in general, tbh, because people get rid of perfectly good, even great stuff the minute they get something new. I've scored stuff by Bodum, Williams-Sonoma, Le Creuset, and Wusthof, not to mention piles of indestructible vintage Pyrex and cool old cocktail things. Fact: if you find a nasty rear end beat up piece of Le Creuset in a thrift store you can still use the lifetime warranty and get a brand new one for free or get a coupon for a steep discount on a new one. I did this with a set I found in my grandfather's attic. They were all beat up and chipped so I called up Le Creuset and they told me to mail them to them and they'd take a look and if it wasn't clearly caused by misuse they'd send me a new set. A few weeks later I had an impossibly heavy box on my doorstep with brand new versions of every pot, for free.
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Apr 13, 2016 23:40
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As dumb as Kuerigs are the other single-cup brewers are way worse, there's some Alterra pouch-based monstrosity at a client site I'm working at right now that produces nothing but undrinkable vaguely coffee-flavored sludge. Last year my ancient PC gamepad kicked the bucket and I figured I'd treat myself and buy a fancy $70 XBone controller. It felt great in your hands, but the left stick sent a signal for straight up when it was resting in the neutral position and no amount of loving with the dead zone helped. Later, I decided to grab a Steam controller after using one to play some Rocket League at a buddy's place, but I vastly underestimated how lovely and awful it is to make do with a controller with only one goddamn analogue stick in 2016 as if I'm sitting there playing the N64. There's just no way to make the touchpad function anywhere near as well as a stick, and as nice as chilling on the couch and playing PC games on my big TV is I pretty quickly went back to playing at my desk with a mouse and keyboard. Seriously, controllers are pretty much a solved problem at this point - why did Valve decide to go all ~special snowflake~ when every game with gamepad support released since literally the loving year 2000 expects dual-sticks?! It's a double-shame because there are a ton of things I DO like about the controller, but without a second stick it's just flat out worse than a $30 Logitech pad for actually playing games, the one thing I want it to do well.
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Apr 14, 2016 00:00
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Stick drift has been a problem since the 360 because Microsoft uses garbage plastic parts in their joysticks. Even the $150 Elite controller uses the same internal joystick part so it can have the issue too.
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Apr 14, 2016 00:03
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It wasn't even a gradual thing, it was hosed right out of the box. I returned it but didn't have the receipt so I ended up with another XBone controller that I haven't bothered even taking out of the packaging yet, hidden among the piles and piles of boxes I generated seemingly from thin air when I moved.
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Apr 14, 2016 00:19
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El Estrago Bonito posted:Hey, George Foreman grills can be really useful, I use mine all the time. The weird thing they are good at making is tater tots. I had a first generation one and ended up wearing off the finish. Now, I have one with removable plates. I use it more than my oven.
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Apr 14, 2016 00:25
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Ryoshi posted:It wasn't even a gradual thing, it was hosed right out of the box. I returned it but didn't have the receipt so I ended up with another XBone controller that I haven't bothered even taking out of the packaging yet, hidden among the piles and piles of boxes I generated seemingly from thin air when I moved. Yeah, I had a bad one out of the box too.
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Apr 14, 2016 00:27
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El Estrago Bonito posted:Hey, George Foreman grills can be really useful, I use mine all the time. The weird thing they are good at making is tater tots. Nothing against the George, I have one too. People just seem to get rid of them a lot.
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Apr 14, 2016 00:49
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Crow Jane posted:Nothing against the George, I have one too. People just seem to get rid of them a lot. It's one of those kitchen items that many people buy new and maybe use twice tops before resigning it to the top of the pantry or some other out of the way place before the following spring cleaning gets it donated it to the thrift store, and said people go right back to cooking on the stovetop, oven, or grill. Familiarity over strange new things and whatnot. See: food processors, toaster ovens, rice cookers, bread makers, oddball crock pots, etc. I have a George, too (that I bought at a thrift store). You guys want an indestructible coffee maker and aren't too snooty with the coffee? Get yourself a vintage Corning Ware or Revere Ware stove-top percolator. Not only are they built to last, but there is something honestly beautiful about an old percolator sitting on the stove top watching it percolate. I've got an 8 cup (for when guests are over) and a 4 cup (for myself) Revere Ware that are both probably 60 years old and still look like new. Makes a good cup of coffee, too. 
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Apr 14, 2016 02:04
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I hate white socks and underwear. I've heard it said that there's a reason that they don't make white tires.
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Apr 14, 2016 05:24
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http://attackofthefanboy.com/news/dark-souls-3-guide-comes-actual-estus-flask/ quote:However, the big deal item here is a full-on replica of the game’s Emerald Estus Flask, which is described as a “high-quality, resin replica.” Judging from the picture the replica looks great and will be interesting to see how it feels actually holding it. So, now that Dark Souls 3 is out, how does it look?  
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Apr 14, 2016 11:58
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its a butt plug so you can be literally hosed in the rear end while metaphorically being hosed in the rear end by the game
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Apr 14, 2016 12:16
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Between that and the awful meme-laden merch that they've put out I'm surprised that there isn't a legion of nerds calling for blood
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Apr 14, 2016 13:35
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I still don't understand the purpose of single-serving coffee pod machines in the home. I'm the only one who drinks coffee in my family and I usually want a single cup. So I put in a filter, shake a couple tablespoons out of the bag, pour in about 8-12 ounces of water and turn it on. It takes about 20 seconds total, and I get a cup of coffee. Why did someone need to streamline that, and why did everyone go nuts?
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Apr 14, 2016 16:17
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20 seconds is like 10 times as long. If everyone had 18 extra seconds every morning we could cure cancer.
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Apr 14, 2016 16:31
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wayne curr posted:http://attackofthefanboy.com/news/dark-souls-3-guide-comes-actual-estus-flask/ This cannot possibly be real, that's loving hilarious.
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Apr 14, 2016 20:10
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If Kojima was on board with that merch you'd probably have to shatter the flask and rearrange the shards to form a unique symbol to your copy of the game for an otherwise impassable puzzle.
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Apr 14, 2016 22:54
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