Low Desert Punk posted:

an all-time classic

King of Foolians posted:

Even if the potato story really happened (it didn't), I don't understand what the guy was planning to accomplish. In the story his girlfriend's family had the exact reaction he was expecting and his version of 'crap I kept digging myself deeper' just makes him look dumb. A better STDH would be claiming that he really did convince them he didn't know what potatoes were and hilarity ensuing.

quote:

My girlfriend (who let me tell you is only my 2nd girlfriend of all time) said I am "invited to dinner" with her and her parents. I was very aghast, nervous, and bashful to be invited to such a situation. But I knew it must be done.

Dejawesp posted:

Imgur loved this one.

quote:

Shot at in DC

Shot around is more accurate. Due to a landscaping emergency (a long story in its self) I was destined to be going to the Home Depot in the District near Brentwood and Rhode Island Avenue. Google sent me through the worst neighborhood possible in NE DC. Open air drug market between Montana and Brintwood Ave. via Soratoga Ave. Google put me in the middle of a war zone. After not finding what was promised to be at that Home Depot via their online inventory, I asked Google to send me to Lowe's in DC. Google sent me up Rhode Island Ave. and told me to turn right onto Montana Ave. At 4 PM just as I turned onto Montana Ave., a gunfight broke out among at least three thugs a half block up Montana Ave. at the drug market. At least a dozen shots fired with some going over the hood of my truck. A quick U turn and burning rubber out of there and up and away on Rhode Island Ave. I was lucky to not be shot by the black hoods running and holding their pants up with one hand and shooting with the other! A day after Christmas! What, did someone get a 9 under the tree?

In the District, you need a "good reason" to carry a handgun for self protection beyond the general "self defrense."

Well it looks to me that a "good reason" to need a gun for self defense in the District of Columbia is going to Home Depot or Lowes!

I will never go there again!

quote:

Hey OP, it's fine that you're racist, but could you please at least not make up fantasy stories about gunfights and warzones in DC. Especially the day after Christmas.

Here's the crime report from 12/25-12/27. One unarmed robbery. Nothing else.




There's 0 reported gun crimes in 1500 feet of that corner of Montana Ave, so no, a gunfight did not break out at "the drug market", which is a funny thing to call a church. This is supposedly where your shootout took place, correct? Near the corner of RI Ave and Montana?






So was the shootout happening on the lawn of the church? Or was it at the community center across the street? Or was it near any number of shops and such nearby that never reported gunshots despite "at least 12 shots" ringing out in broad daylight and this gang of drug dealer "black hoods" running with their hands on their pants?

It's a good thing we have people like you to spot these open drug markets. And, to think, they've been hiding right UNDER THE NOSE of the Fire and EMS station!

GoGoGadgetChris posted:

You should post the original quote in TFR and see how excited they get

Catberry posted:

Bogan King posted:

I can believe that. I've had people try mug me before and just looked at them and gone nope and that was all that was needed. I do live in a place where getting robbed at knifepoint is already rare and at gunpoint almost unheard of though so ymmv.

Thin Privilege posted:

Fake because it's called a logic board, not a motherboard. If this idiot actually repaired apple products he would know that. And don't say "well he said motherboard to make it clear what it was!"

Also I highly doubt any repair shop has legit parts or training to repair the inside of an iPhone, unless they are super sketchy and buy used phones off eBay. My scummy friend who has an apple-authorized repair shop sure as gently caress doesn't have any iPhone parts, and he is able to get parts directly from apple.

Fruit Smoothies posted:

Ugh.

The Snoo posted:

ok

e: this post was shared on facebook as a screenshot of the post on facebook

Verisimilidude posted:

A classic.

kazil posted:

No one born in the last 50 years has been named Maggie

kimbo305 posted:

"oooh, this looks like a high quality lock in a sturdy door frame. I'm gonna have to charge a $125 difficulty fee"

Jerry Cotton posted:

A normal person would have just written Dvorak; I mean no-one says "I like Ludwig van Beethoven". Possibly he doesn't know Dvořák is pretty main-stream because he just Googled up composers.

e: What I mean is: he probably has never listened to Dvořák or at least doesn't know if he has.

brylcreem posted:

Insert your middle finger into the vagina, with your palm facing up, then bend the finger upwards. That's (supposedly) the G-spot.

EmmyOk posted:

please don't post like this