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Does anyone have the story of the guy who had a job where he did nothing and kept collecting pay checks? Like he would go into work, but not actually do anything because his actual job got "lost" in the system and he was on the payroll with no oversight.
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Apr 18, 2016 23:32
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| # ¿ May 4, 2024 05:28 |
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Paladinus posted:This is my story, actually. EvilHawk posted:Here's an archived version: Thanks a ton. And you write an entertaining story Paladinus, I just figured this was the best thread to find it again.
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Apr 20, 2016 00:39
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So when I met my current girlfriend, we met through our love of pokemon. It was love at first sight. Poke Go was in full swing and I was looking for a very rare Vaporeon. As fate would have it, the Vaporeon was near a lake, (dare I say luck....or fate?). As I was getting closer to my white whale of a Pokemon (By white whale, I mean a reference to the classic book, Moby Dick, about a man who obsesses over a whale. Something that I would come to find ironic when I met my girlfriend. Not because she was a whale, lol, just because she was kind of fat. And whales are usually fat. But she lost weight, so not sure why this is relavent.... So I met her while we both got to Vaporeon at the same time. She wanted it so bad, but I got it first. As I got there, I shouted "Team Rocket is blasting off again". A reference to the popular Pokemon show "Pokemon". In that show, a small cadre of villains would be mean to people. Namely the protagonist, Assh. So they would say that when they won. I said that when I got there before her. Because I got the Pokemon before her. However she took it all in good stride, laughing and saying I won good sir. She complimented my quick thinking and liked that I was ready for a good Pokemoning* (Apparently she made this verb up. I just went with it, who am I to deny a poet). Anyhow, I was Pokemoning and she caught me. I took her Vaporeon, but that was how it should be. From there, we talked and things kept going. For as long as we knew each other, every time something happened to the other, we would use the classic line "Team Rocket is Blasting Off Again". Whether it was her beating me to Golden Corral's ranch fountain or the cats litter box, she always knew our secret song. Our whale song, if you will. All this time, we wanted kids. So badly. I knew they would be just what we wanted. Someone to play WoW with and help us clean. I was ready to be a dad and she was ready to eat even more once our in laws knew we had an extra mouth to feed. "Team Rocket is Blasting Off Again".....but it didn't have quite the effect I was hoping for. Even though the Wal-Mart toilet deserved it, I didn't say it with as much gusto as I was used to. My love, my Misty....my blasting Team Rocket....she had some issues. Not type two diabetes like I hoped, but the big C. We were worried about our hope We wanted kids so bad. Someone to keep catching Pokemon even after we were dead. We had been trying for awhile, but it never seemed to work. When we went to a specialist, my sperm were deemed "too bored". But I kept trying our special phrase, the one from when we first met...."Team Rocket is Blasting Off Again"......to no avail. Anyways, we wanted something for us to remember her. A complete Naruto Manga collection, as impressive as that is, was not enough. We wanted my seed to grow and have our own love grow. And we tried, even up until the end. Nothing ever worked, but I remember our last moments. She was too weak to eat her last Krispey Kream, but I force fed her as I climbed on top, our stomachs giving us our last friction of hope for what I thought was the last time. As I ate the last donut hole we had, I cried and gave her the last gift I could give...."Team Rocket is Blasting Off Again.' But it would never blast off again.................................................
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Jul 30, 2016 10:44
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Fathis Munk posted:"zombie" "urban" I can't loving stand people who use code words to describe another race. And they will always have a smirk on their face when they say it too, especially when in public. So you are racist enough to talk poo poo about them, but not brave enough to do it where they can hear you.
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Aug 27, 2016 17:23
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Non Serviam posted:I didn't defend this guy, I said that you, or whatever poster it was, was grasping at straws trying to come up with some racism to get angry about. The point that was trying to be made was just because you haven't personally heard of "zombies" being used as a code word for black people doesn't mean that anyone was grasping for straws. This is a real thing that people do, especially someone who makes up gun toting fantasies. I personally work in an industry that caters just to gun people. I was pointing out that people do it and it is irritating.
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Aug 28, 2016 02:49
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Non Serviam posted:This is circulating in Serbia, but with one of their politicians. The same thing literally just happened about a mile from my house, minus the drunk part. I'm guessing the people involved wished that was the only thing that happened to them, since one died, and the other two are still in critical condition.
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Sep 16, 2016 17:11
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Katt posted:
I think I have also seen this story be used as an allegory for abstinence, but not with those pictures, which would be hilarious.
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Dec 1, 2017 15:11
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| # ¿ May 4, 2024 05:28 |
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Are there guys still like this? I would loving love for my wife to make a ton of money.
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Dec 20, 2017 15:31
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