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As we all know, Hillary Rodham Clinton is responsible for the deaths of at least 5 people. I believe that she has used these deaths plus her own dark magic to secure her everlasting reign of terror in the form of several Horcruxes. So, where did she put pieces of her soul? Possibilities: 1) Bill Clinton - It would explain his degeneration and inability to speak anything but evil phrases. Also we know you can put Horcruxes in living beings but I'm unsure if you can put them in Humans. 2) A Cassette Tape containing the recordings of her paid speeches - Could explain why she doesn't want to admit this item exists??? 3) A replica of Salazar Slytherine's locket purchased from a June 2005 issue of DeltaSky Magazine - Seems unlikely but she doesn't actually seem all that creative so it would make sense. There are at least two others, so what are they? Where might she be hiding the small pieces of her soul? We're just asking questions here. Also note this is NOT a thread for planning the destruction of said horcruxes, we don't want the FBI or Ministry shutting down another political comedy forum Skyl3lazer has issued a correction as of 14:40 on Apr 27, 2016 |
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Apr 27, 2016 12:41
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Why is everybody saying horcruxes lately .... was it from a movie or something?? ... Knock it off already imo..
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Apr 27, 2016 12:51
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katlington posted:Why is everybody saying horcruxes lately .... was it from a movie or something?? ... Knock it off already imo.. truth will out, you can't stop the people from knowing
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Apr 27, 2016 12:53
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Bernie Sanders is a Hufflepuff.
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Apr 27, 2016 12:54
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4) Hot Sauce: it's a good strategy to keep at least one of the horcruxes near you so nobody can- and I'm not suggesting anyone do this to a Presidential Candidate- destroy all of them. This newly revealed "bottle of hot sauce" Hillary always carries with her would be a good cover for this strange jar of red liquid all her handlers keep seeing her clutch tightly in her hands.
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Apr 27, 2016 13:00
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Constant Hamprince posted:Bernie Sanders is a Hufflepuff. Wise, unassuming, wouldn't be the cause of the largest war the wizarding world has ever seen. But idk he's shown a lot of chutzspa in this election and has a great natural charisma and that's pretty Gryffindor. ^^ makes sense, i like it
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Apr 27, 2016 13:00
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Byyrd: Yer a grand Wizzard, Hilly!
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Apr 27, 2016 13:14
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you don't know what the gently caress you're talking about Bernie is Dumbledore, Hillary is Snape, Cruz is Voldemort, Trump is 'arry
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Apr 27, 2016 13:33
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umm, snape was in love once, and that is definitely an emotion with which Hillary is unacquainted
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Apr 27, 2016 14:00
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Slime Bro Helpdesk posted:Byyrd: Yer a grand Wizzard, Hilly! I loled.
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Apr 27, 2016 14:04
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AHH FUGH posted:you don't know what the gently caress you're talking about Wasn't Dumbledore a Gryffindor as well though? I could be off on this. Cmon guys you're off topic where are the horcruxes into which the souls of Vince Foster and the other Brave Men At Benghazi were forged?
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Apr 27, 2016 14:09
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Bernie is clearly Fudge. Hillary is McGonagall, Cruz is Pettigrew, Trump is Lockhart, Rubio is Quirrell, Obama is Lupin, Bernouts are Stan Shunpike and Palin is Umbridge. FDR
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Apr 27, 2016 14:16
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Geoff Peterson posted:Bernie is clearly Fudge. Hillary is McGonagall, Cruz is Pettigrew, Trump is Lockhart, Rubio is Quirrell, Obama is Lupin, Bernouts are Stan Shunpike and Palin is Umbridge. your headcannon is really weird
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Apr 27, 2016 14:18
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Skyl3lazer posted:your headcannon is really weird Bill is Hagrid and Harry is Millennials who vote in the midterms.
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Apr 27, 2016 14:23
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Skyl3lazer posted:Wasn't Dumbledore a Gryffindor as well though? I could be off on this. she had a delta force operative remove the VileTat from VileRat's corpse. It now lies framed in a secret Arkansas vault, writhing in spectral agony as she leeches the power from its sacred ink.
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Apr 27, 2016 14:24
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Hillary: Darth Maul, Cruz: Darth Maul, Trump: Darth Maul, Bernie: Qui-Gon Jinn
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Apr 27, 2016 14:25
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Hillary : Vetinari Bernie : Carrot Trump: Dibbler
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Apr 27, 2016 14:36
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zeal posted:she had a delta force operative remove the VileTat from VileRat's corpse. It now lies framed in a secret Arkansas vault, writhing in spectral agony as she leeches the power from its sacred ink. how can you tell if its writing in agony vs just how it usually looks
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Apr 27, 2016 14:38
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This is probably the most significant thread on these here Something Awful forums.
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Apr 27, 2016 14:39
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The W key
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Apr 27, 2016 14:44
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I don't see why we need to stand by and watch a country go muggle due to the irresponsibility of its people. The issues are much too important for the voters to be left to decide for themselves. -Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Chilean Coup
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Apr 27, 2016 14:54
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Skyl3lazer posted:Wasn't Dumbledore a Gryffindor as well though? I could be off on this. Vince Foster's murder horcrux is the blackberry she always carries around. Why do you think she insisted on using it for her emails. The whole private email thing was to cover up her horcrux's actual use. The Benghazi one is actually just Trey Gowdy's age inappropriate hair. If only he knew.
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Apr 27, 2016 15:05
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Bloody Queef posted:Vince Foster's murder horcrux is the blackberry she always carries around. How the gently caress did I miss this
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Apr 27, 2016 15:13
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It's quite brave of her to carry fragments of her soul on her person.
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Apr 27, 2016 15:19
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Who are the other 4 murders? I know only of Vince Foster. Also, is it safe to say she used the imperius curse on people like Paula Jones and Gennifer Flowers. Lewinsky was able to resist however.
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Apr 27, 2016 17:18
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5) Trump's hair
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Apr 27, 2016 17:26
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A Winner is Jew posted:Who are the other 4 murders? The other 4 murders were Benghazi
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Apr 27, 2016 17:46
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Oh god. One of the Benghazi horcruxes was Goonfleet. 
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Apr 27, 2016 17:52
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Quorum posted:Oh god. Eve nerds were only trying to save the world from 1000 years of pantsuits Bloody Queef posted:The other 4 murders were Benghazi yes
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Apr 27, 2016 18:25
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a Bosnian sniper's bullet
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Apr 27, 2016 18:49
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Toadvine posted:The W key I get this reference.
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Apr 27, 2016 18:51
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Quorum posted:Oh god. Has anyone ever seen Hillary Clinton and the Mittani in the same room? 
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Apr 27, 2016 19:10
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TODO: Investigate if wizards can store magic on the internet. Maybe horcruxes in missing emails? Can you email a horcrux, download as attachment?
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Apr 27, 2016 19:23
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Skyl3lazer posted:TODO: Investigate if wizards can store magic on the internet. Maybe horcruxes in missing emails? Can you email a horcrux, download as attachment? These are the kind of pressing questions that make me wish that Harry Potter was set in the Aughts instead of the early Nineties.
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Apr 27, 2016 20:00
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Bip Roberts posted:Hillary: Darth Maul, Cruz: Darth Maul, Trump: Darth Maul, Bernie: Qui-Gon Jinn Kasich: Jar Jar
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Apr 27, 2016 20:28
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Skyl3lazer posted:TODO: Investigate if wizards can store magic on the internet. Maybe horcruxes in missing emails? Can you email a horcrux, download as attachment? Vilerat was murdered in order to create the final horcrux: a piece of Hillary's soul captured in a .jpeg and stored on her secret Connecticut server bank.
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Apr 27, 2016 20:42
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Her purse sauce was a good idea, but it's a redhot herring. E: the blackberry is a promising lead though. The Kingfish has issued a correction as of 20:50 on Apr 27, 2016 |
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Apr 27, 2016 20:43
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Yea the hot sauce may just be an excuse to get would-be usurpers to stick their hands into her purse
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Apr 27, 2016 21:13
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A Mayan statue smuggled out of Honduras.
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Apr 27, 2016 21:23
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Constant Hamprince posted:Bernie Sanders is a Hufflepuff. Hillary: Ravenclaw Bernie: Gryffindor Kasich: Hufflepuff Trump: Hat said Slytherin but he convinced it to put him in Gryffindor just like Harry Cruz: Double Slytherin
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Apr 27, 2016 21:28
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