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it was nice to finally have a day off for the feast of St. Trump, looking forward to St. Trumpusts day. they say they'll even let us have meat not a lot of complaints, really. I've got a mud hut, one bowl of gruel a day, and sometimes the local lord lets me sleep with my wife. really worried about marauders from the south though. they outta build a motte-and-bailey.
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May 23, 2016 14:56
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"THEY'RE MY PROPERTY!" -said Trumpishly
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May 23, 2016 15:11
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ahhhh the trump brown shirts just chopped my dick off. i wish we hadn't listened to those morons on the comedy political web forum molten salt reactor and voted for bernie instead
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May 23, 2016 15:12
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TRUMP! *dies of radiation sickness*
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May 23, 2016 15:24
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Good news liberals: rates of cause of death ny gunshot decline Bad news liberals: rates of cause of death by oxcart skyrocket
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May 23, 2016 15:32
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goddamn everything is bad now because the other guy won arggh *is cut down by a waylaying robber knight*
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May 23, 2016 15:34
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maga, m'lord
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May 23, 2016 15:43
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Al! posted:Good news liberals: rates of cause of death ny gunshot decline i suck at farming. Sad! my pa, he was an angry man. he'd yell at my mama, "loving oligarchs shut off the Trumpfucked aqueduct again!" mama would be in the kitchen, saying nothing. pa, he'd scream, "remember youtube?" it was him taught me my reading and writing, taught me my memes. i never once heard mama speak, not in all my years. sometimes at night though I'd hear her singing, to the babies, like she was an angel. she sang like Miss Universe. i'd hide by the thatch door and breathe in the air from her lullaby nonsense songs. rah rah ah-ah-ah ra mah ro-mah-mah gaga ooh-la-la I want your love love-love-love you and me could start a bad romance
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May 23, 2016 17:43
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"Well, at least all the Hillary voters were put up against the wall" *digs ditch for no reason*
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May 23, 2016 18:00
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Al! posted:it was nice to finally have a day off for the feast of St. Trump, looking forward to St. Trumpusts day. they say they'll even let us have meat You have this all wrong, everyone will have premium TRUMP steaks every day
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May 23, 2016 18:10
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tazjin posted:You have this all wrong, everyone will have premium TRUMP steaks every day "Eat of my Trump steaks steaks and drink of my Trump wine, and you shall have MAGA everlasting" the priests tell us, but all I can taste is blood and human flesh
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May 23, 2016 18:16
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*gets accused of making a small hands joke.* *gets hands cut off by the Trumpquisition*
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May 23, 2016 19:32
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*Gets gunned down by the yoogest and most luxurious Trump-800 model Trumpinators. *While dying I wish that I had been executed by Bernie's death squads instead.
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May 23, 2016 20:26
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*toils for years in the darkness of the Trumpmines* *finally earns enough to watch a gladiatorial match, and by a small miracle, it's between that meddlesome wanderer with the mysterious pendant, and BONECRUSHER THE CRUEL* *the melee unfolds in cinematic fashion, the wanderer defying certain death time and again* *somehow, the wanderer disarms BONECRUSHER THE CRUEL of his hydraulic buzzsaw gauntlet* *the gauntlet hurtles into the crowd* *is decapitated by the buzzsaw gauntlet as it slams into the flimsy bleachers, which collapses from the impact* *the wanderer smiles and makes a witty one liner*
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May 23, 2016 20:31
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*willingly votes for trump every 4 years* *no one actually counts the votes after the first 90%+ blowouts*
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May 23, 2016 20:31
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in the dark future of mankind, there's only the best wars, some great wars, don't we love our wars folks?
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May 23, 2016 20:32
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Listen. Orange men on reality TV firing people is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical televised ceremony.
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May 23, 2016 20:32
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I love CHUDS!
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May 23, 2016 20:36
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Baloogan posted:*willingly votes for trump every 4 years* *eventually no one remembers how to count*
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May 23, 2016 20:42
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Can't wait for my annual taco bowl to celebrate the feast of Trump Invictus
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May 23, 2016 21:04
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Haha hey guys remember when we posted in that "first 100 days of Trump" thread and made jokes about him carving his name on the moon? Good times. Okay, well, the bombs are getting closer, nice knowing you all.
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May 23, 2016 21:51
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*loads the last bushel of wheat onto the oxcart and begins the long trek to the Trumpyramid to store the grain for winter*
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May 23, 2016 21:59
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Dolash posted:Haha hey guys remember when we posted in that "first 100 days of Trump" thread and made jokes about him carving his name on the moon? Good times. Okay, well, the bombs are getting closer, nice knowing you all. My eldest wife found me outside the hut at midnight. I was looking through the viewfinder of an ancient telescope, pointed up at the charred, blackened moon. She put a hand on my shoulder. "Whatcha doing still awake at this hour, Trumps Baby Hands?" She asked, even though she already knew the answer. With a weary sigh I looked up from the telescope. "Do you think....do you think he's still up there?" I asked. She took her hand off my shoulder, rubbed her tired eyes. Slowly, she said, "Baby Hands... it's been 30 years since communications went dark. If he were alive, we'd have found out decades ago. It's just not possible. Now, come to bed." She slipped back into the hut, stepping carefully, so as not to awake the other wives or the children. I moved to follow her, but first I glanced back up at the moon, shiny black in my naked eyes. "Goodnight Newt," I whispered.
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May 23, 2016 23:00
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maybe this year i wont have to sell my child to live
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May 24, 2016 00:23
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*stumbles upon the Book of Jeb, finds passages that cast doubts on the mythos of Trump's rise to power* *is eventually beheaded in front of a cheering crowd*
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May 24, 2016 00:44
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For the first time, he heard something that he knew to be music. He heard people singing. Behind him, across vast distances of space and time, from the place he had left, he thought he heard music too. But perhaps, it was only an echo.
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May 24, 2016 00:48
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*dies during childbirth* *like, my personal birth as a child, i dont have a uterus*
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May 24, 2016 02:01
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I really, really misspelled Trumpocalyptic
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May 24, 2016 03:00
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Al! posted:I really, really misspelled Trumpocalyptic low energy spell checking
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May 24, 2016 03:09
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lets mispell with the notion that al! doesn't know what he's doing. al! knows exactly what he's doing
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May 24, 2016 03:16
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*is decapitated for staring at Trump VI's horrifically deformed jaw, the product of generations of daughterfucking*
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May 24, 2016 03:20
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the ptrumpolemys
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May 24, 2016 03:28
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oystertoadfish posted:the ptrumpolemys Berenice Sanders was in league with Trump all along
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May 24, 2016 03:36
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there's no POST trump
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May 24, 2016 03:42
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Al! posted:Berenice Sanders was in league with Trump all along 'sand'ers... egypt... the, like, desert... the parallels are beyond debate
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May 24, 2016 03:44
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I am the tax collector, abusing the liberals i come across and making them pay 500% more because i hate them
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May 24, 2016 03:56
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tax collectors in early modern france were the usual targets of a peasant revolt they would commonly be stripped, beaten, and humiliated, but interestingly they were almost never killed they would almost always hide in the town's inn, which gave the villagers a convenient excuse to loot the inn's booze and have a rad party generally the officers of the crown would show up a few weeks later and find one or two people to execute but by early modern standards tax collector-shaming was a relatively harmless activity as compared to, like, drinking water
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May 24, 2016 04:06
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oystertoadfish posted:tax collectors in early modern france were the usual targets of a peasant revolt a good job for a goon
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May 24, 2016 04:16
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Hmm there are only white males around. Better start suckin' dilz. *Gets murdered*
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May 24, 2016 04:38
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French Canadian posted:Hmm there are only white males around. Nah that's the Bernieverse
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May 24, 2016 04:45
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