- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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*me waiting for my turn on the show, my eyes scanning over my nervous family and friends, dollar amounts flashing in my mind as i look them over*
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May 25, 2016 02:11
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 9, 2024 18:01
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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me: im going to use my lifeline to phone a friend
regis: okay who are you going to call
me: im going to call my friend ben from middle school
me: hahaha look at me now ben. you always picked on me in middle school but guess what: im going to be rich. haha looks like i was the more successful one in the end. bet you wish you didnt bully me now huh
ben: uh great. thats really cool. can i hang up now i need to vacuum my house
me: wait ben, whats the capital of norway
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May 25, 2016 12:38
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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guy who won everything on 'millionaire': *picks up phone* hello?
kidnapper: listen very carefully. we're not loving around this time. tell us where the money is or your daughter bites it
guy: hmmm. well, regis, i'd like to phone a friend
kidnapper: ...i'm sorry?
guy: my lifeline. phone a friend
kidnapper: ...i'll put her on i guess?
daughter: daddy help i don't know where we are but i could swear i heard a rare native species of bir --
guy: now honey i know you're excited and it's a big moment, but gee, i just don't know how to answer this one. what do you think?
daughter: what
guy: where's the money? c'mon, we've only got... 10 seconds left.
daughter: daddy no this isn't --
guy: oh gosh! rats. time's up. what a stumper
kidnapper: the gently caress, guy? tell us where the loving money is
guy: gee regis. i just don't know! 'ask the audience'
kidnapper: jesus gently caress! ...hey bryce, come over here and tell him we're not loving around
bryce: we said no names, jayden! no naaaaaames!
jayden: gently caress! gently caress! look, we'll do this your way: a. you tell us where the money is, b. we shoot and kill your daughter. what is your final answer?
guy: (heavy breathing)
jayden: WELL?
guy: ...50/50, regis!
*sound of gunfire*
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Jun 16, 2016 13:32
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