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Man, how can you not love Gordon? Here's my favorite exchange, from essentially every episode of Kitchen Nightmares: Right, so how's the business going? We are losing $19,000 a month and cannot afford to stay open for more than another 5 days without help. How many booked for dinner? Zero, no one comes in here anymore and we are failing so loving hard 1945 Hitler would pity us. OK well let's talk about my lunch. The burger I had was dry and tasteless and the rice you served with it was obviously old, it was hard as bullets and totally tasteless. Shocking! WHAT THE gently caress ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT LITERALLY EVERYONE LOVES THAT BURGER NO ONE HAS EVER COMPLAINED ABOUT IT BECAUSE IT IS THE BEST BURGER IN AMERICA YOU JUST DON'T KNOW! WE COOKED THAT RICE ON WEDNESDAY AND IT ISN'T MOLDY AND DOESN'T SMELL BAD SO IT IS PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE! It always cracks me up. Hey, yeah, the business is failing and I'm an inch from being out on the streets but it can't be because of the food! That's my food! I put that burger on the menu! What the gently caress do you mean seaweed, maple syrup, and pickled ox tail don't make sense as burger toppings?!?! WHAT DO YOU KNOW ANYWAY? This is the very finest Wagyu beef! It's to his credit he never points out that he's a multimillionaire with double-digit Michelin stars to his name while they can't keep the loving raw meat away from the cooked and haven't cleaned their stove in five years. Some of the restaurants he goes to are serious head-scratchers, like the BBQ restaurant that would smoke their meat every day and then instead of serving the fresh smoked meat would instead put it in plastic bags in the refrigerator to reheat in the microwave and serve tomorrow while serving yesterday's microwave-reheated meat today, or the one where a dude refused to let his kitchen staff speak to each other during service because "they've got a job to do and it's not chattering."
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Jun 3, 2016 22:37
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| # ¿ May 21, 2024 04:35 |
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