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The Bananana
May 21, 2008

This is a metaphor, a Christian allegory. The fact that I have to explain to you that Jesus is the Warthog, and the Banana is drepanocytosis is just embarrassing for you.



Edgar posted:

Rats, used my shotgun money to buy my wife a hammock for her birthday.

Take that bitch back

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Nicomo
Jan 22, 2015
Be sure to teach your children/siblings to defend themselves also:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDWo6m5hbG4

Duo
Aug 4, 2002
I heard there is such thing as a "bullet button" and it allows a person to kill 5000 children a second. I think it should be banned!!!

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012

guns own you whiny little bitches

EmperorFritoBandito
Aug 7, 2010

by exmarx
Nice gun, OP, I guess.

Please don't harm yourself or others.

skeletonotherkin
Sep 26, 2014

Varg posted:

Lol shotguns are probably the worst weapon for self defense that store totally owned you

So they're only good for ducks and clay pigeons? I'm planning on buying a ruger 10/22 this year as my first gun, since its pretty much what everyone I know recommends as a starter gun. That being said I secretly want to simultaneously purchase a bigger long gun.

InterceptorV8
Mar 9, 2004

Loaded up and trucking.We gonna do what they say cant be done.
Care to play a game?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNNpFKVE3Mw

Gamer With Dignity
May 15, 2016

by Nyc_Tattoo

1500quidporsche posted:

This was my favorite scene in Full Metal Jacket.

proof of concept
Mar 6, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
why would you play a hockey game on the genesis where the players aren't monsters and robots that can pick up weapons and kill each other?

Ork of Fiction
Jul 22, 2013

Duo posted:

I heard there is such thing as a "bullet button" and it allows a person to kill 5000 children a second. I think it should be banned!!!

The bullet button causes you to shoot out a 360 degree circle of bullets, hitting enemies all around you. It could possibly kill that many children, but it's v. unlikely.

The Bananana
May 21, 2008

This is a metaphor, a Christian allegory. The fact that I have to explain to you that Jesus is the Warthog, and the Banana is drepanocytosis is just embarrassing for you.



Ork of Fiction posted:

The bullet button causes you to shoot out a 360 degree circle of bullets, hitting enemies all around you. It could possibly kill that many children, but it's v. unlikely.

What if you were surrounded by 5000 enemy children?

proof of concept
Mar 6, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
then it would be way more likely, in that specific rare scenario

Ork of Fiction
Jul 22, 2013

The Bananana posted:

What if you were surrounded by 5000 enemy children?

Ah, ye olde "Out of Africa" scenario. Gonna need a lot of pickups for that sitch.

Crowsbeak
Oct 9, 2012

by Azathoth
Lipstick Apathy
I would like to thank op for making me feel good about biking 16 kilometers today.

FogHelmut
Dec 18, 2003

Guns are cool and good and I want to get in on some sweet shotgun action but my wife is all "no guns in the house."

I'm liberal as all gently caress, and gently caress the NRA and the Republican party and all that. Regulate the poo poo out of these guns because I'm wealthy and educated and white enough to pass any gun ownership test.

EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
I bet op will buy this next.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
Actually no it's this.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

PureEvil6_13
Jun 1, 2004

I LIKE PETA AND THINK THAT SCIENCE IS EVIL
Mossbergs kick like fuuuuck

Bip Roberts
Mar 29, 2005
The best home defense weapon is a vest with 4 kilograms of military grade RDX and about 100-200 ball bearings pressed into the plasticizer.

Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless

Bip Roberts posted:

The best home defense weapon is a vest with 4 kilograms of military grade RDX and about 100-200 ball bearings pressed into the plasticizer.



can you buy that at a pawn shop?

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy

Blue Train posted:

bernie likes guns which is part of why he owns so hard

ur dumb if you dont like guns tbh the only people who dont like them have never fired one

Edgar
Sep 9, 2005

Oh my heck!
Oh heavens!
Oh my lord!
OH Sweet meats!
Wedge Regret
I recommend an old tin can with some pennies, rocks, or marbles inside. Place the can on a chair next to a door. When the bagul tries to steal your anime figurines, the racket should wake you up just in time!

new friend from school
May 19, 2008

by Azathoth

Edgar posted:

Rats, used my shotgun money to buy my wife a hammock for her birthday.
So what lol get a Maverick or Stevens or something if you're broke, shotguns are cheap af you would literally have to be food stamp poor if you can't afford one

skeletonotherkin posted:

So they're only good for ducks and clay pigeons? I'm planning on buying a ruger 10/22 this year as my first gun, since its pretty much what everyone I know recommends as a starter gun. That being said I secretly want to simultaneously purchase a bigger long gun.
Get a Mosin playa.

EorayMel posted:

I bet op will buy this next.

Who makes that and what is it called?

Robo Reagan posted:

ur dumb if you dont like guns tbh the only people who dont like them have never fired one
qft

Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
They had some mosin nagants at the pawn shop but they were all like $500

I'm gonna have to collect a lot more cans for that

bikesonyx
Oct 9, 2014

EorayMel posted:

Actually no it's this.



I agree like him loving himself in the rear end

KaiserSchnitzel
Feb 23, 2003

Hey baby I think we Havel lot in common
OP if you want a gun for home defense you should probably have chosen one that is less likely to put gigantic holes in it when you inevitably shoot at the squirrel climbing the tree outside that in your groggy, half-awake state you mistake for a rapist home invader.

KaiserSchnitzel
Feb 23, 2003

Hey baby I think we Havel lot in common
Of course, I bought my Mosin for home decoration, rather than home defense. Mainly because I'm not concerned about squirrels raping me anally. So I'm probably not the best source of advice.

I could stab the gently caress out of a bear with it, though. Then the bayonet would be lodged in the bear's throat while I am at a safe enough distance to pull the trigger and I wouldn't need to worry about Soviet accuracy.

And yes, I am concerned about anal rape by bears moreso than by squirrels.

KaiserSchnitzel fucked around with this message at 23:15 on Jun 6, 2016

Gamer With Dignity
May 15, 2016

by Nyc_Tattoo
Bernie Sander's home state of Vermont has the most lenient gun laws in the nation, the best beer in the world, and the lowest per capita rates of violent crime in the nation.

Now compare this to Donald Trump's New York lmao that will be $8 for your lovely microbrew IPA and don't even think about owning a gun, citizen.

Roylicious
Feb 21, 2012

Braver than the cops
ain't afraid of no chaps
If they steppin up on me
I just start bustin some caps
If someone broke into my house (which is already really unlikely but alright) I'd rather just let them have the TV or whatever rather than kill them.

Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless

Roylicious posted:

If someone broke into my house (which is already really unlikely but alright) I'd rather just let them have the TV or whatever rather than kill them.


Why would you let yourself be victimized

eldrinkycrowjay
Jun 26, 2012
Why do you still have a CRT TV? Did you take that picture with a Game Boy Camera?

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012

Roylicious posted:

If someone broke into my house (which is already really unlikely but alright) I'd rather just let them have the TV or whatever rather than kill them.

smdh maybe they're right about the pussification of america

Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
I live in a safe neighborhood I don't think anyone will break in. I didn't buy a gun for home invaders. I bought a gun because I'm a weak beta and I want to feel powerful.

Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
You need a CRT television for retro systems. Lol just lol if you play Sega Genesis on an HDTV

Roylicious
Feb 21, 2012

Braver than the cops
ain't afraid of no chaps
If they steppin up on me
I just start bustin some caps

Ein cooler Typ posted:

Why would you let yourself be victimized

I'm being victimized regardless obviously, person has already broken in.

I'd rather just hang out in my safe room and let him take my insured material goods rather than kill him and have to deal with the emotional/psychological impact of that.

I don't have any kids or whatever to worry about though :shrug:

Blue Train posted:

smdh maybe they're right about the pussification of america

I guess, if you think shooting someone over a cheap TV is brave or something.


Besides who breaks in when there are people home? I feel like this is a common 'what if' scenario in people's head but how often does it really happen if you're not living near literal crack dens?

Ork of Fiction
Jul 22, 2013

Roylicious posted:

I'm being victimized regardless obviously, person has already broken in.

I'd rather just hang out in my safe room and let him take my insured material goods rather than kill him and have to deal with the emotional/psychological impact of that.

I don't have any kids or whatever to worry about though :shrug:


I guess, if you think shooting someone over a cheap TV is brave or something.


Besides who breaks in when there are people home? I feel like this is a common 'what if' scenario in people's head but how often does it really happen if you're not living near literal crack dens?

One of my friends from high school got robbed while her parents were out. Guy brained her with a lamp while she was watching television. She was in a coma for 9 months and requires 24 hr care now because she's basically brain dead. In addition to her, two of my adult friends have been murdered by robbers, one at his bar, one at his home. Anecdotes, I know, but don't trust that a smile will be ur umbrella when meth heads are scrambling around your home. They are not rational/reasonable. Reasonable ppl don't rob u.

e: also, ur safe room is way safer when u can shoot ppl who bust into it.

Cartouche
Jan 4, 2011

OP have you tested it's stopping power on yourself yet? Please report your findings.

Roylicious
Feb 21, 2012

Braver than the cops
ain't afraid of no chaps
If they steppin up on me
I just start bustin some caps

Ork of Fiction posted:

One of my friends from high school got robbed while her parents were out. Guy brained her with a lamp while she was watching television. She was in a coma for 9 months and requires 24 hr care now because she's basically brain dead. In addition to her, two of my adult friends have been murdered by robbers, one at his bar, one at his home. Anecdotes, I know, but don't trust that a smile will be ur umbrella when meth heads are scrambling around your home. They are not rational/reasonable. Reasonable ppl don't rob u.

e: also, ur safe room is way safer when u can shoot ppl who bust into it.

Right when I posted that I thought about crack heads being crack heads and yeah alright. That's fair enough. I don't live in that kind of neighborhood though so I never felt the need but obv not all places are the same. If you want a gun to defend yourself with I'm not saying you shouldn't have one.

But, to be fair, if dude brained her with a lamp while she was watching TV she didn't have the chance to defend herself anyway, same for the bar dude probably. I'm talking about you're in your bedroom and you hear a break in and you make the conscious decision to go unlock your gun, load rounds into the magazine, etc (unless you just keep it loaded and in a drawer I guess but that seems dumb to me) versus just running out the back window or something. For all you know you're going to miss and then the robber stabs/shoots you in the confusion.

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
guns and fantasy cutlery represent our rights of freedom. never let anyone take them away and if they try you have my permission to shoot and stab them up real good like.

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naem
May 29, 2011

-lock yourself in your bedroom
-dial 911 and put it on speakerphone
-aim legally owned firearm at door

"Yes hello I have a home invader please come quick to blah blah address, I have duly retreated to my bedroom, have locked the door, and am afraid for my life.

By the way I have a legally owned firearm and am afraid for my life, which is why I have duly retreated to my bedroom because of how afraid for my life it is that I am which is very I might add.

What's that? This whole conversation is being recorded? Great

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