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quote:I just felt like sharing a few real-life messages to women, who, of course, don't give a poo poo. 3 different women in 3 messages. Enjoy my pathetic-ism? pathetic-ness? .. lol w/e.
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Jul 6, 2016 19:36
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| # ? May 4, 2024 21:55 |
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Hi r/relationships, This may seem silly, but it's become a real challenge over the past few months. My boyfriend and I have had a great relationship since finishing school, and we just moved in together over the summer. We get along, have similar hobbies such as going outdoors and playing the same video games, and even work in similar fields. Everything was going well until my boyfriend jumped on the Trump 2016 bandwagon. It started innocently enough. "Oh hey bflovestrump2016, he actually makes some decent points about blah or blah or blah" (nothing racist). That's fair -- I can respect someone's political opinion if it doesn't necessarily agree with mine. What set off alarm bells, though, was when my boyfriend picked up a copy of "The Art of the Deal" that he now keeps by his nightstand. It only progressed from there, with him exhibiting these types of antics: Regularly saying "You can't stump the Trump", then laughing like a maniac whenever Trump is mentioned in the media Loudly commenting on the illegal immigrants working at restaurants or other locations we visit Wearing a "Make America Great Again" hat and refusing to remove it at the dinner table Jokingly saying that we need to "build a wall" to keep our neighbors' kids from running onto our lawn It's gotten to the point where I just don't want to bring politics up around any of our friends/family because I know he's going to launch into a tirade on the "liberal media slandering the Donald". I've been with him for so long and really do love him, but his newfound adoration of Trump drives me crazy and embarrasses me in public. tl;dr: Boyfriend as an ardent Donald Trump supporter, driving me crazy!
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Jul 6, 2016 19:40
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Killer Queen posted:
this is me
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Jul 6, 2016 19:44
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Killer Queen posted:I don't really understand why some dude would be all conflicted about consensually banging a 22 year old, but this is reddit, so naturally this is the biggest decision of his worthless life. Naive answer is that what should be the kind of thing he runs by a friend quickly to eliminate questions of propriety (since he coached her as a teenager and hosed her mom) has to go on the Internet because as a Reddit addict the Internet is his only outlet for poo poo like this Less naive answer is that it didn't loving happen and he wants to experience the feeling of Internet strangers telling him it's okay to let this hypothetical 22-year-old fashion model go crazy on his dick because she obviously wants it so very badly.
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Jul 6, 2016 19:44
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Set Trump boyfriend up with le meme girlfriend, let them have many insufferable babies together
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Jul 6, 2016 19:45
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So I have kind of a dumb problem. My fiancé hardly ever does any of those little nitpicky things that drive me crazy. We've been together 3 years, living together for 6 months of it, and we got engaged last month. He does do this one thing though: he'll stop in the middle of a conversation to quote stand up routines out of the blue. He won't quote one line. He'll say as much routine as he can remember. He will do this with just me, or in a crowd of our friends. He always uses the exact intonation of the comic. He does it loudly in a look at me voice. When he does it, all conversation stops. It doesn't matter if the people in the group are fans of the comic, or even if they know what he's talking about. Our younger, sheltered friend always looks at him like he's going crazy. I don't even think he does it to be funny! He's a very funny person, he comes up with original jokes and makes me and our friends laugh all the time, so I'm not sure why he does this. Out of our friends group he is the most outgoing, funny, talkative one and it's not like he hurts for attention from me or from us as a group. Three nights ago he and I had just finished having sex. I was laying snuggled up against his side, talking to him about his plans for a new Pathfinder campaign. He asked me a question and I started to answer it, when he rolled to face me and said in a West Indies accent "Somebody get this niglet away from me!" and launched into a long monologue about having never heard this slur before. It's a Donald Glover routine. (Just so you know, we're white, but he doesn't normally quote race routines or comedians who do race jokes. I think he'd just watched Glover on Netflix.) I wasn't interested and I kept trying to answer his question, but he kept talking. So I rolled over to sleep and he kept going. I'm not sure how long that routine is but he was still talking when I drifted off (it doesn't take long for me but it was probably at least 4 minutes). I've talked to him about him doing this, especially in public when it stops a multi-person conversation in its tracks, but he keeps doing it. I don't know why. Can you guys help me understand? What can I say that he'll actually listen to? Last time I was like "Is there a reason you do that? No one understands the joke and it pulls focus away from conversation." and he got really hurt. tl;dr: If I have to hear the What's New Pussycat routine after sex one more time I'm gonna loving kill someone
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Jul 6, 2016 19:46
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:I'm super type A and she's Type B. It mostly works out fine but I sometimes we set out to do something grand and she under-prepares to a point of danger. lmao it's the YLLS version of the goon who gets mad at his SO for wiping the raid
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Jul 6, 2016 19:50
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you're not taking my dumbass hobby seriously enough 
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Jul 6, 2016 19:51
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loquacius posted:Naive answer is that what should be the kind of thing he runs by a friend quickly to eliminate questions of propriety (since he coached her as a teenager and hosed her mom) has to go on the Internet because as a Reddit addict the Internet is his only outlet for poo poo like this
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Jul 6, 2016 19:51
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his thought process got really bizarre and he would repeat things like "can't stump the trump" and "i love making GBS threads inside trump assholes"
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Jul 6, 2016 19:54
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:they all told him not to do it, or at least to tell her he hosed her mom first well actually yeah he should probably tell her he hosed her mom, that makes sense I mean really it depends on what she's looking for but still Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:"i love making GBS threads inside trump assholes" mods namechange pls
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Jul 6, 2016 19:58
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:they all told him not to do it, or at least to tell her he hosed her mom first Hmm yeah, I should probably tell a woman I'm interested in that I had sex with her mom 7 years ago. Seems like a fine idea. The one and only vague issue is the dude was previously her authority figure, but it really doesn't matter at this point because he coached her nearly a decade prior. There's no ethical questions here. Just hilarious stupidity.
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Jul 6, 2016 20:13
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Bardeh posted:which one of you is this? Greetings
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Jul 6, 2016 20:19
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To the person reading all of these posts "ironically" and has scrolled down to see this shitpost oasis I've made in between the copy+pasted stories: Lol
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Jul 6, 2016 20:20
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thathonkey posted:Jesus loving christ this guy should be in jail or at least lose custody of his daughter 
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Jul 6, 2016 20:24
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It's amazing how un selfaware these people are At least goons know they're insufferable
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Jul 6, 2016 20:59
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Thanks for the link Jeff.
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Jul 6, 2016 21:00
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There was one story that was related in en I think that ended up being about this woman who didnt understand why her boyfriend was jealous of some guy she met through Twitter and people dug up that after she made the Reddit thread her bf made his own and they started replying to each other's threads and she vanished from here
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Jul 6, 2016 21:00
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I'm assuming r/relationships is a lot like E/N in that it's 90% OPs complaining about trivial bullshit and everyone telling them to  over it, and 10% ridiculous over-the-top trainwrecks
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Jul 6, 2016 21:13
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I don't know why but every time Mark asks to hang out, all he wants is a hand job from me. He doesn't kiss and doesn't want anything else. I like cuddling, though. And I guess it's okay we don't have sex because I hate it when I'm pressured to have sex and I don't want to have it. No kissing, though? I've never done anything with a guy without kissing -- until now. This is a first. He doesn't want sex, just a HJ, that's it! tl;dr I don't get why he just wants a hand job from me when he has himself for that! I wanted to bring up to him why he does that but it's so awkward to ask. Has anyone else dealt with this before?
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Jul 6, 2016 21:19
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here are a couple of two worlds reddit posts i don't think you'd know this from experience, ariel. but this, on the other hand....  (in response to this meme) 
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Jul 6, 2016 21:45
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Yeah that pisses me off too dude
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Jul 6, 2016 21:49
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To be honest reddit is just way too easy to mock? By that i mean we need a dedicated "redditard" subforum
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Jul 6, 2016 22:06
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Billmac posted:To be honest reddit is just way too easy to mock?
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Jul 6, 2016 22:10
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Billmac posted:To be honest reddit is just way too easy to mock? We used to have a dedicated Reddit mock thread, back in the day, but mock threads are generally frowned upon these days (unless it's Freep)
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Jul 6, 2016 22:15
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My sister has been back from college for the summer and she's been picking on me nonstop. She pokes me, grabs me, makes fun of me and doesn't leave me alone. I don't know what her problem is. I haven't seen her for a year (she studied abroad and didn't come back for the summer), and all of a sudden she's super aggressive towards me. We used to actually have a good relationship, she looked out for me, and stuck up for me. She was touchy-feely but not inappropriate (she'd kiss me on the cheek, cuddle up to me on the couch etc.), but now she's trying to grab my dick when I walk by, she slaps my rear end, tries to pull my shorts down. She touches me all the time, rubs my chest, she even literally tried to lick me several times. She makes fun of me in front of her friends and my friends. She was the queen bee popular girl in high school and her friends are pretty hot (they're also in for the summer). When they're all hanging by the pool, I've learned to stay away. She yells for me to get my "virgin rear end" over there. Once when I was in the kitchen she got one of her friends to come get a drink completely naked. Her friend has an amazing body but I was more embarrassed than turned on. I pretty much turned super red and they all just laughed at me. I'm really starting to just hate her, but she does this thing where anytime she does anything really bad to me she apologizes and tells me how much she loves me. She tells me how good looking I've gotten and says all of her friends want to gently caress me. She follows me around and asks me about who I've been with and what I've done. She rubs her body against mine when I'm walking by or sitting down. She's flashed me a bunch, literally put her boobs in my face. If this sounds hot, it's not, it makes me feel embarrassed and ashamed. I'm too embarrassed to tell my parents, she never does it in front of them, I just told them she's been bothering me and they told her to leave me alone (as you can imagine that didn't do much). I actually sat her down and asked her to stop, she apologized but that night after I dozed off she got on top of me and dry humped me, making moaning noises, I pushed her off and she just laughed and told me "not to be such a pussy". She's pretty much an adult and about to leave college, I don't know how she thinks it's okay to be like this. I feel like she's not mentally healthy. I have no idea what to do. I don't feel comfortable in my own home. I'm anxious all the time, I avoid being home when she's around and even when she's not I'm afraid of her walking in any minute and abusing me. Now I also have to worry about next week when my parents are leaving for a couples vacation with their friends and they're gone for the whole week. So I'm alone with her for eight days. She's told me how she's looking forward to us being together and tells my parents she'll take good care of me. My plan is just to crash at my friends place but I don't know if I'll be able to do that for eight straight days. Sorry for the rant but I can't take her anymore. She laughs everything off likes it's a joke and no big deal. Just now she took a shower with the door open and then came out in a towel and flashed me. For anyone wondering, yes she's attractive, pretty much all my friends want to gently caress her. The only friend I told about this situation keeps telling me how awesome it must be. Let me make it clear, it's really not, AT ALL. My summer is pretty much ruined, I only work 3 days a week and I could be playing video games and hanging by the pool most of the time, but instead I spend all my time trying to avoid a pyscho who happens to be my sister. I'm too embarrassed to tell my parents the full extent of it. Talking to her hasn't worked so pretty much my only option is to avoid her as much as possible and wait for summer to be over and her to leave. Sorry for the rant, but I'm really loving pissed. I'm not a violent guy and despite it all, I'll never hurt her but I wish I could just punch her in face. What am I supposed to do at this point? tl;dr my sister is constantly picking on me and being sexual. It's really bothering me and I don't know what to do.
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Jul 6, 2016 22:23
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Your Dead Gay Son posted:There was one story that was related in en I think that ended up being about this woman who didnt understand why her boyfriend was jealous of some guy she met through Twitter and people dug up that after she made the Reddit thread her bf made his own and they started replying to each other's threads and she vanished from here remember that one goonette that posted a thread in E/N about her creepy friend that started stalking her, including moving halfway across the country just to live next to her Then a couple hours later her stalker registered an account posting another thread to communicate with her? good times
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Jul 6, 2016 22:25
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CharlestonJew posted:remember that one goonette that posted a thread in E/N about her creepy friend that started stalking her, including moving halfway across the country just to live next to her Then a couple hours later her stalker registered an account posting another thread to communicate with her? goddam, link?
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Jul 6, 2016 22:26
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:My sister has been back from college for the summer and she's been picking on me nonstop. She pokes me, grabs me, makes fun of me and doesn't leave me alone. I don't know what her problem is. I haven't seen her for a year (she studied abroad and didn't come back for the summer), and all of a sudden she's super aggressive towards me. We used to actually have a good relationship, she looked out for me, and stuck up for me. She was touchy-feely but not inappropriate (she'd kiss me on the cheek, cuddle up to me on the couch etc.), but now she's trying to grab my dick when I walk by, she slaps my rear end, tries to pull my shorts down. She touches me all the time, rubs my chest, she even literally tried to lick me several times. that's a lot to write with just one hand
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Jul 6, 2016 22:29
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One of my favorite E/N threads was something like "I'm going to get fired because of my farts" where the OP described that he was getting complaints about them, people avoid him at work, and his boss laid down a threat if he didn't do something about it. Awhile was spent tracking down the cause. He cut out cheese/milk for a day or two and they stopped, indicating he was lactose intolerant. "Oh good", thought e/n, he fixed his farting problem. Nah, he says something like "I love cheese and eat every meal with cheese and I'm not going to stop". Lactose intolerance is a medical issue, he concludes, and the union won't let him be fired for a medical issue. This all sounded pretty fake at this point, so the OP wraps it all up with pictures of the 10 different varieties of cheese sitting in his fridge.
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Jul 6, 2016 22:31
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It's like redditors are having a humble bragging competition. "Ugh! The hot daughter of a MILF I hosed wants to hook up, what do I do!!" "Oh yeah, well my hot sister and all her hot friends are constantly exposing themselves to me and want to gently caress, I seriously need help Reddit!"
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Jul 6, 2016 22:31
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Nazzadan posted:It's like redditors are having a humble bragging competition. it's called stdh.txt and it's as old as the internet the latter also crosses genres with "stealth fetish porn"
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Jul 6, 2016 22:48
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ANIME IS BLOOD posted:it's called stdh.txt and it's as old as the internet this is a very boring assumption. i choose to believe anything i read on the internet is true, unless proven otherwise
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Jul 6, 2016 23:05
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I will keep this as short as possible. I dated Amy for 3 years. She was working as an executive assistant for the president of a mid sized company. Everything is great, yada yada yada. About a year ago she came home excited and told me about this huge bonus she was getting. This bonus was the equivalent of a years salary for her. Around that time my car broke down. Well she bought me a new one. Not a new one, a new used one. Costing about 9K. She ends up quitting her job for another one shortly after this bonus came in. Cue up 2 months ago. Long story short I find out she was cheating on me and kicked her to the curb. Turns out she was having an affair with that President she worked under. I confront, we break up. But then she lays this bombshell on me: That huge bonus was actually blackmail money to not go to the guy's wife about the affair. Now thats all in the past and she is out of my life. But here I am with a car bought with dirty money. I feel guilty about it. But I need this car. Even if I sold it and bought a new one I would just be recycling the dirty money. Should I feel bad about this? Would you? I guess its not a big deal but my mind keeps going back to it every time I get in my car. tl;dr: I received a gift paid for by blackmail money and now I feel guilty.
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Jul 6, 2016 23:19
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i wish i got a free car when a girl cheats on me 
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Jul 6, 2016 23:26
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Nazzadan posted:It's like redditors are having a humble bragging competition. what kind of person would brag about being molested by their sister
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Jul 6, 2016 23:59
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YeahTubaMike posted:what kind of person would brag about being molested by their sister the kind who masturbates to incest porn and anime
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Jul 7, 2016 00:01
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:his thought process got really bizarre and he would repeat things like "can't stump the trump" and "i love making GBS threads inside trump assholes" Perma-severed boyfriend Trumpstumper58.
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Jul 7, 2016 00:46
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Gaunab posted:that's a lot to write with just one hand mods please change the thread title to this tia
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Jul 7, 2016 00:54
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| # ? May 4, 2024 21:55 |
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Rutibex posted:i wish i got a free car when a girl cheats on me This a whole bunch. I'd date way more often than I do if this was the case.
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Jul 7, 2016 04:35
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