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Anyone who's been on SA for more than a few months knows that there are some bizarre sex toys out there. Insertable, inflatable, penetrable, grotesque, painful, oversized, and just plain gorgeous. I decided to give the hobby a shot a few years ago, and it was surprisingly easy to learn. Making dildos doesn't take any particular skill beyond a knack for 3-dimensional artwork (and I mean "artwork" in a very loose sense). The equipment isn't too expensive and you don't need a dedicated workshop, but don't expect to get your security deposit back after basting your carpet in liquid silicone. If you'd like to go one step further and actually sell these dongs, there is bottomless (hurrr) demand for fantasy toys. People will gladly pay ten times what they cost to make.  There are an awful lot of great people in the dildomancy business. Fellow independent manufacturers can become great friends, and loyal repeat customers ensure that there's never a lack of work. But the dildo world is not all sparkles and anthropomorphic unicorns, my friends. Like most industries, there is a dark undercurrent. Suspicion, espionage, and sabotage all lurk beneath the surface. On top of that, there are some infamous customers out there that we all avoid, and for good reasons!  I stopped selling dildos after a couple years when I came to a few realizations: 1) I couldn't come close to satisfying demand 2) I already had a full-time job, and working a second wasn't for me 3) My coworkers started to suspect something was up 4) There is unending drama in the dong biz  Ask away - I'll answer anything I feel comfortable answering. By the way, if a mod is handy (I don't have plat), I'd like to know whether it's kosher to post un-spoilered, inline pictures of dongs. EDIT: An eldritch abomination of an elf dildo was produced for the thread, and is available for purchase. The post containing ordering info is here. Dildomancer fucked around with this message at 12:25 on Aug 30, 2016 |
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Aug 8, 2016 22:47
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Poldarn posted:What's the weirdest dildo you made? Weirdest dildo: I guess it depends on your perspective, but probably one that was a giant radish with a flared base. It did not turn out well because it's such a bizarre shape. Weirdest request I refused: Had a couple people ask me to make dildos that looked like realistic turds. I might not have much dignity left, but at least I said no to something. What do I want to make: Teledildonics and haptic feedback are pretty cool fields, but the technology is already there; it just hasn't really matured or made it to market in mass quantities. As for something that straight-up doesn't exist, I'd say variable-firmness toys.
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Aug 8, 2016 23:23
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ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:Are you the Bad Dragon guy? Hell no, even the craziest dildomakers all agree that dude's a douche.
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Aug 8, 2016 23:23
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ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:A couple questions as a follow-up: 1) I haven't, might someday if I've got time to kill. 2) In some sense, what he's infamous for are just business practices - bullying competitors out of business with bogus lawsuits, buying up a bunch of websites and spamming them with his ads, trademarking names of toys that other people have made... and then you get to the shadier stuff, like straight-up stealing or knocking off smaller manufacturers' designs. There's the heavy-handed moderation of his forums that bans anyone for posting a remotely negative review of a product, his incredibly poor quality control, ridiculous price gouging, publicly attacking anyone he sees as a threat to his business... And there are a lot more, uh, moral shortcomings that I'd love to mention, but I don't want to end up on the wrong side of his lawyer. The less said about the dude, the better. Dildomancer fucked around with this message at 23:49 on Aug 8, 2016 |
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Aug 8, 2016 23:46
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Wedemeyer posted:How often did people want to return used items, and did you agree to? Maybe 1-2% of the time. I'd typically offer a refund or replacement and let them keep the original toy, since the return shipping would probably cost me more than a used dong is worth. I did have one very nice model that was returned and then sold on Etsy (clearly marked as used). Wedemeyer posted:What's the general allure of those 'egg' kegel dildos? The kind that look like beads, but are bigger and without a string. Do people just want to poo poo out pseudo dargon eggs? There are some people who are really into oviposition or just have a strange anal pica where they cram themselves with as many objects as they can. I don't know anyone who does it specifically to squeeze them out afterwards. But there is another reason: they can bring about some pretty strong female orgasms, similar to being fisted, in the right people. It's something I got to witness once and my mind was blown. Wedemeyer posted:What were your top selling dildos? Or did you mainly do OOAK custom pieces? Popularity typically scaled with price. The $20-$25 toys were most popular, though I do have one model with ridges, bumps, and a knot that's sold at least 50 despite being a whopping $30. Wedemeyer posted:Did you also make other things like orifices, or just stick with dildo type toys? I made some packers (fake packages for transmen) and sheaths, as well as a penetrable prototype. Penetrables are a bit harder to make than normal dildos, but not impossibly so. I didn't sell any because they would've cost $70+. Wedemeyer posted:Re: bad dragon guy It's totes about ethics in dragon dildo. Antivehicular posted:I mostly just want to hear about dildo-industry drama, as much as you feel comfortable sharing. Drama I'd rather split into multiple posts devoted toward more specific aspects rather than just vomit out ten paragraphs of "he said, she said." You are absolutely correct about the fantasy dildo market. I expected it to be all furries, but I didn't realize that the community (mostly on Tumblr) was so huge. I'd say 1/3 to 1/2 of my customers were not furries (or at least not overtly so) and well over half were female, which you wouldn't expect from furries. Animal-Mother posted:Has anyone ever requested an Ouroboros dildo that fucks itself forever? No, but I'd make one if they did. Wouldn't be too hard; the mold would just be some PVC pipe. Let's say 1 foot of 1", an adapter from 1" to 2", then another foot of 2" pipe with a 1" pipe stuck in the last 6" or so to make a >1" void. Bam, ouroboros cock. Hummingbirds posted:Welp, I know what I want for Christmas Awkward story: my mom found out about my hobby and asked for a toy for Christmas. The result:  Bitter Mushroom posted:What are the dildo's and the dildont's? I made a video about this since people asked so many times: https://vimeo.com/165657410 The short answer is always make a flared base, and if you're going to make your own toy, plan it out so that it's possible to pour. But some people have asked for toys without flared bases, toys with dangerous-looking spikes, toys with loving enormous knots that I am certain led to rectal prolapse... but I also found out that some people have a pink sock fetish, so that's not as surprising as you might think.
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Aug 9, 2016 12:25
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Lodin posted:This is a cool and interesting thread. Sure. This should be a pretty familiar process to anyone who's done casting before, whether with wax, metal, or anything else that starts as a liquid and then solidifies. I've made a complete video series on the process, but personally I hate video tutorials so I'll go through the process here.  There are two ways you can do it. You can either make a model first, then make a mold out of that, and then produce the toy from the mold, or you can skip the first step and make the mold directly. I do it the first way because I don't have a 3D printer and it's much easier to see how a toy is going to look when you have a clay model. If you're doing it my way, then, you're going to make a model first. You can use clay, wax, wood, plaster, pretty much anything you like. In fact, you can use pre-existing objects like a soda bottle or a living body part as your model if you like. (Shave your body hair first or you'll get an impromptu wax job) Of course, the material you choose for the model will depend partially on what material you're making the mold out of. If you're going to make a metal mold, you probably don't want to use a wax model. Likewise, if you're making silicone molds like I do, you need to know which materials are incompatible with silicone and will inhibit its curing. If you do gently caress up and use something that's incompatible with silicone, it's not a huge deal, though; you can coat it with sealant to create a chemical barrier between the two materials. Anyway, at this point, you are going to make a mold that will envelop this model. If you are only going to make one toy from the mold, something like alginate, papier mâché, or a plaster cast will work fine. These materials typically won't survive the extraction of the final product. On the other hand, if you're going to be mass-producing your disturbing phallus, you want a more durable mold material. I use platinum-cure silicone, the same stuff I make the toys themselves out of. Though squishy, silicone's good for at least 50 pourings as long as the mold is made correctly. I imagine Bad-Dragon uses metal or something similarly durable. I have a friend who uses urethane molds. If you've got a 3D printer, you could make one out of ABS or a similar hard plastic. The next thing to figure out is whether you want a one-part mold or a two-part mold. One-part molds peel off the final toy like a glove. I put a slit down the side of mine to make them easier to remove, but that means I need to carefully align the edges of that slit each time I pour a new toy. Some folks with more advanced equipment cut keys into their molds to make alignment easier. A two-part mold is pretty straightforward: very easy to open up, but you have to be very careful with alignment when putting it back together. Two-part molds give you some more versatility with the kind of toy you're producing, as some shapes don't work well with one-part molds. Now how you make the mold itself is a matter of preference. I use a hard plastic sheet to make a cylinder around the model, then pour in a few cc of mixed and degassed silicone. Once it cures, the cylinder is now connected to the base of the model and won't squirm around too much, so I pour in enough to cover the model plus a centimeter or so. Let it cure, peel off the plastic, remove the model. If you're doing a live-mold (and I know you're going to make a rubber copy of your shameful penis, don't even pretend otherwise), you will have to get a bit more creative. One way to do it is to cut the top off a plastic soda bottle, fill it with goop, jam your willy in there, and wait for it to cure. I recommend silicone with a short pot life for that, or else you've gotta keep a hard-on for an hour or more. Most people don't want to make a model of their flaccid member. You've got your mold (and if you 3D printed it, this is where you'll begin). Spray it repeatedly and thoroughly with some release agent. Mann's Ease Release 200 is pretty good (though I'm sure I'll get lung cancer someday). Make sure any slits in your mold are aligned properly, secure it with duct tape, and then pour in your final silicone. The way you pour it in will determine the patterning of the toy. Let it cure at room temperature, then carefully peel the mold away, and voilà - you have a shameful phallus replica. There are a ton of variations on this theme. You can make tentacles, sheaths, penetrables, suction cups, cumtubes, all that poo poo, it's just slight changes to the overall formula. I can post more about the type of silicone and the degassing/pigmenting/admixtures in another post - this one is getting pretty long.
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Aug 9, 2016 22:06
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Wedemeyer posted:Neato, OP. So how do you go about advertising your brand new dildo shop? I know come cosmetic companies send out samples of new products for beauty blogs to review. Is that also a thing in the Dildomancing world? Or do you spam tumblr? I know etsy is kind of oversaturated with mass made products from China, and can't imagine self promoting there would go well. And do you also get the NSFW fanartist's problem of customer's trying to roleplay with you? I didn't have to do any advertising. Within a couple months of making my first, I had more orders than I could possibly fill. As soon as you make a Tumblr account and post some pictures, the followers, um, tumble in. I only use Etsy to sell premade toys, because you're right - it's very hard to get exposure there. Plus, Etsy takes a cut of your listings. Easier to just deal person-to-person. As for free samples, here's the deal with that: make sure you pick someone reliable. I only sent out a free sample once, and it was a huge, elaborate toy. Its circumference was 13", if that gives you an idea. It went to Canada, and I covered shipping as well. Dude never wrote the goddamn review. Also, never accept trades, and get paid in advance. Your faith in humanity (furmanity?) will take a serious hit early on. Wedemeyer posted:The entire Nursing Thread in the Goon Doctor forum breathed a sigh of relief and disappointment. And huh, I did not think folks would enjoy being hosed by a branch of rose covered in thorns. The nursing thread and the EMT thread are two of my favorites on the forums! I wouldn't dream of sending them more CC: ABD PN DX: FB IN ANUS patients (at least not without a Dunkin Donuts gift cert).
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Aug 10, 2016 00:10
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nonnemaus posted:So what percentage of your shameful phallus replicas end up being made from your own shameful penis? I never put one up for sale. That would be super unclassy. And besides, I already used up the world's supply of polydimethylsiloxane making up the first one. Stuntman posted:Which fictional character did you get the most requests for a dildo based off of them? Hmmmmmm... the most popular color scheme is probably Lucario. Even then, that's only ~10 cocks. People have very diverse and specific interests. Welcome to GBS posted:Would you recommend getting into this business? How much money can be made? Why didn't you quit your job and make them full time? I wouldn't recommend it unless you really enjoy customer service and working with your hands. If you charge the same as the other manufacturers, you can make $50/dong profit, and it takes 5-10 minutes to make a typical one, once you have the mold ready. I was charging far below that (making $5-20 apiece) and doing custom orders that took a good deal longer sometimes - stripes, multiple firmnesses, special glow-in-the-dark color schemes, that kind of thing. If you made it a business, you could expect to make a decent profit, especially if you worked 40 hours a week. You'd need a few grand in vacuum chambers, pumps, and other various equipment to make more than a couple toys at a time, but those are one-time costs that will quickly be offset by revenue. So being conservative and saying $20/toy, 6 toys per hour, 40 hours a week, that's nearly $5k/week profit. That's about $200k/year after taxes. HOWEVER, this assumes you can keep finding customers. Most of the small manufacturers have more customers than they can handle, and the large ones have multiple employees. Slot in among them and you stand to make some serious cash. So why didn't I? Quite a few reasons. 1) I am pretty soft-hearted and hand out free stuff / no-questions-asked refunds / very low prices. I'd feel bad charging significantly more than what something cost me to make. 2) I live with my wife in a tiny little apartment that was already a quarter taken up by dick-making apparatus. 3) My day job and night job are both pretty good. 4) I don't think I could live with myself if I only ever made dicks for the rest of my life. Maybe making a bunch of cash would change that, maybe not, but from my current perspective that just seems depressing. 5) There is unending drama and stress. If you don't have thick skin, you won't make it far.
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Aug 10, 2016 01:59
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Fauxtool posted:Did you at least enjoy naming the dicks? That part sounds fun Yes, it really is  Maybe I should make a tiny silicone fist and name it The Donald.
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Aug 10, 2016 02:10
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Carth Dookie posted:Tbh full time dong production for 3-4 years paying off a mortgage and funding your kids college education sounds like a pretty good investment to me. If you want to do it, go for it. However, I wouldn't recommend quitting your day job until you've made dildos part-time for a few months, built up a customer base, and decided you enjoy it. Having a 3-year gap in experience could be a major red flag when applying for another job later on. How would you spin that in a job interview? "I spent four years as the founder and CEO of a start-up in the personal healthcare sector. I started the business with five thousand dollars of my own money, hit six-figure revenue after a year, and sold it last month for $350k. My innovation in the fields of polymer science and biocompatible solids led to unprecedented market penetration."
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Aug 10, 2016 02:38
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If anyone is really serious about starting this as a hobby, I can put together a shopping list of stuff you'll need. It's like $500 to get started plus another $500 for the vacuum degassing equipment if you want to produce high-quality toys. Platinum-cure silicone is about $25/liter and most toys are going to be in the 250-800mL range.
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Aug 10, 2016 03:05
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Wanamingo posted:Do you/your wife enjoy using weird dildos yourselves? Not really. We're pretty vanilla and prefer real dicks. You don't get the same variety in shape or texture, but a real partner actually moves on his own and, for some reason, seems less painful. The Lone Badger posted:You mention knots several times - how is that even supposed to work without the ability to inflate/increase in size*? Or is that something I'm better off not knowing? Toys with knots aren't necessarily inflatable. I'd wager that >99% aren't. The knots are usually solid silicone in a pre-expanded state, and it's generally assumed that any knot you can fit through your ring can slip back out with appropriate coercion. It is VERY important that the flared base is wider than the knot, because otherwise you're going to have a ‼FUN‼ insurance claim for emergent foreign body removal. Inflatable toys typically use a similar apparatus to a blood pressure cuff: bladder inside the toy, pneumatic tubing, release valve, squeezebulb. Close the valve and squeeze the bulb to inflate, open the valve to deflate. Edit: Fauxtool posted:im guessing they could be made of the softer material while the shaft was harder. Also, have you seen the poo poo people fit in them? This is a real technique to make what's called a "core" but I doubt it would be very useful for inflating a knot. There are a couple ways to make a core: 1) Fill your mold with soft silicone, let it partially cure, upend it and dump out most of the (now very gooey) silicone. Pour firm silicone into the void. -or- 2) Put a solid object (I use a PVC pipe with the end capped) in the silicone before it cures. Remove after curing (hope you used release agent). Pour firm silicone into the void. Dildomancer fucked around with this message at 12:15 on Aug 10, 2016 |
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Aug 10, 2016 12:10
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Bitter Mushroom posted:Has anyone ever been murdered with a poison dildo? Most dildos you get in sex shops are made of cheap rubber and are slightly toxic. I don't know if anyone's died from one. Good silicone isn't porous and you'd have a tough time getting any appreciable amount of poison to stick to the surface. Now if you embedded some Polonium... Moridin920 posted:Say I wanted to start making dildos and selling them online. Just for starting out purposes, is it possible to sell on Etsy (or similar sites) or would I have to probably create/host my own website? Very few of my sales went through Etsy. Most were via Tumblr or FetLife or FurAffinity or email. Customer asks for a toy, you send them a PayPal invoice. When it's paid, make the toy and ship it. PayPal lets you put in the tracking number. If you really wanted to get lots of sales, I guess you could set up a frontend via Etsy or whatever. They certainly allow you to sell dongs there, so it's within their ToS. Moridin920 posted:please do Shopping list and vendors coming up. For the guide, there is an video series here: https://vimeo.com/album/4072478 The basic steps are there, and there's a new video on advanced techniques every couple weeks. Moridin920 posted:lol where do they get off considering their profession is making fantasy animal dildos? dumbos The dildo enthusiast community is tight-knit and has a LOT of transpeople. When you go out of your way to offend a large portion of your customer base, your only remaining option is to continuously court new customers before they catch wind of your toxic attitude.
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Aug 10, 2016 22:30
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Shopping list for making dongs These are all US-based retailers since I'm in the US. Different sources may be cheaper overseas. Materials Platinum-cure silicone: You want to buy it from Smooth-On or one of its distributors. There are three types you'll be using. A note: the cured firmness is measured on the Shore scale. Wikipedia has some details if you're curious, but I'll put references below. All of these come out to ~$25/liter shipped. - Dragon Skin: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/dragon-skin/ This is a moderately viscous clear silicone for stiff toys. The softest is Dragon Skin 10, which is Shore A 10 (see below). There is also Dragon Skin 20, which is a good deal stiffer and very viscous. I used to use it to make molds because it is very durable, but the viscosity means it has to be vigorously degassed. - Ecoflex: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/ecoflex/ This is much softer, less viscous clear silicone. It's my favorite to use because the low viscosity reduces degassing time and mess. Its firmness uses the Shore 00 scale, which is softer than Shore A. I use Ecoflex 00-20 and 00-50 for super soft and soft toys, respectively. Watch out for the short pot life! - Mold Star: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/mold-star/ Mold Star 30 (Shore A 30) is great for making molds due to its low viscosity. It is not meant for making toys out of, and it's colored anyway, so all your toys would be blue. It's somewhat less durable than Dragon Skin 20. There are softer Mold Stars and a transparent one, but I don't recommend those. For a firmness reference, 00-20 is extremely soft, like fatty skin. A toy made from 00-20 will not stand up on its own. 00-50 is somewhat stiffer, like slack muscle. Slender toys will droop and fall over, but buttplugs and the like will stand on their own. A 10 is about as firm as a flexed muscle and good at fighting gravity. A 20 is about as firm as an erection. A 30, for making molds, is as stiff as the rubber used in rubber bands. There is no one firmness that works for every toy, or every user. I let customers pick which of the four they wanted. Pigments: With the right combination of pigments, you can make your toy almost any color. Some manufacturers do not offer custom colors, or charge more for them, so one way to stand out is letting a customer tell you exactly what color they want. A 9-pack sampler is $30 and will make hundreds of dongs. - Silc Pig: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/silc-pig/ Very good pigment. The colors blue, green, and red are especially strong compared to the rest. Black and yellow are almost inadequate, so I recommend using lots of them or using cosmetic mica, below. - Ignite: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/ignite/ Fluorescent pigment. If you'd like to make UV-reactive toys, grab some. It needs to be stirred VERY well. Also comes in a 9-pack sampler. Powders: Not strictly necessary, but they do help things and give you more options when it comes to colors. - Glow Worm: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/glow-worm/ Phosphorescent powder. Green glows brighter than blue, but blue is a more popular color. $20-32 per 6-ounce container, which will last you a long time. The more you use, the brighter it gets, so feel free to experiment. - Cosmetic mica: https://www.amazon.com/Metallic-Pigment-Cosmetic-Slice-Moon/dp/B008KN0POA/ref=sr_1_1 This is one vendor. There are so many different colors; just make sure they're body-safe before you get them. Black cosmetic mica is SUPER dark and much better than Silc Pig. Other colors will give you fantastic sparkly effects. Other stuff: - Ease Release: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/ease-release/ Essential when making toys, because it keeps silicone from sticking to itself. Apply liberally via spray bottle the first time using a new mold. One coat per dong is enough afterward. If your dong sticks to the mold, you will probably end up ruining both of them. - SuperSeal: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/superseal/ Depending on what you make your model out of, it might inhibit silicone from curing against it. An example is normal potter's clay, which may include sulfur. Coat it with SuperSeal before you make the mold. - Sculpey: https://www.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/B0016N6CMU/ref=sr_1_1_olp?s=arts-crafts This is a 1.75-pound box and will make you one to three toys depending on size. Sculpey does not need to be sealed before making the mold. You can use aluminum foil, wood, or PVC as a base and add Sculpey, which will reduce the amount you need. Very easy to work with. - PVC pipe from your local hardware store. Use it as the base for your models, use it to put voids in your toys as they're poured, pour silicone into them to make tentacles. Equipment Vacuum degassing equipment: You can forgo this if you're just making toys as a hobby, but your toys will have vast numbers of tiny air bubbles which will hurt their durability and usefulness. You can buy this stuff from pretty much any vendor. - 3-gallon vacuum chamber: https://www.amazon.com/ProVac-Vacuum-Chamber-3-gal/dp/B00E0BG8R4/ref=lp_9521772011_1_3?srs=9521772011 I have 1-gal chambers, but I recommend getting 3-gal because you will be able to degas bigger bowls and more silicone at once. Remember that you can only fill the bowl about 1/4 of the way when degassing. - Vacuum pump: I don't have a particular recommendation; I got a combo like the one below. A single-stage pump is fine, 3cfm is fine, long as the ultimate vacuum gets below 29" Hg (25 Torr absolute pressure). My pump has an ultimate vacuum of 5 Torr, but realistically it's not going to get below 15 under normal use. - Combo: https://www.amazon.com/ProVac-gallon-Vacuum-chamber-Robinair/dp/B00K1I1244/ref=lp_9521772011_1_1?srs=9521772011 I started out with 2 chambers and 1 pump. Eventually got 2 more chambers so I could mix more colors at once. Other stuff: - Mylar sheets: https://www.amazon.com/Mylar-Stencil-Material-Blank-Mylar-24-stock-priced-foot-7-5/dp/B008FPASTK/ref=sr_1_7?srs=9521772011 I did not get my mylar online, but if you are going to get it there, get it as thick as you can. This is 7.5 mil. Get at least 6 feet of it because you'll be using a lot. - Mixing bowls: https://www.amazon.com/5-Quart-Heavy-Duty-Stainless-Steel-Mixing/dp/B00CLM12F2/ref=sr_1_7?s=kitchen I THINK these will fit in the 3gal chamber above. If you use other bowls, make sure they're entirely metal. Wide bowls are better than tall ones, as long as they'll fit in your chamber. These are 5-quart bowls and will hold about 1L of silicone during degassing. - Toothpicks: https://www.amazon.com/Good-Old-Values-Bamboo-Toothpicks/dp/B0064CT13U/ref=sr_1_2?s=kitchen Use these to collect pigment and stir it into your silicone before degassing. Also good for getting the stuff out from under your fingernails after it cures. - Packing tape: https://www.amazon.com/Rolls-Grade-Clear-Packaging-Tapes/dp/B005P7P9M2/ref=sr_1_10?s=office-products You will use a lot of this. Tape your mold together, tape the mylar around the model, tape the mylar strip to the top of the mold, tape your packages together. - Spoons for stirring the silicone - you should have some on hand. If you don't have a spoon, then I just don't know what to say. - Measuring cups: https://www.smooth-on.com/product-line/mixing-containers/ In all likelihood, you won't need anything that can measure more than 500mL. I use 300mL cups for pretty much everything. Get something that's graduated in 50mL increments or smaller. - Custard dishes: https://www.amazon.com/Anchor-Hocking-Custard-Cups-6-Ounce/dp/B000LNS2HE/ref=sr_1_4 Custard dishes for making suction cups. Get some smaller ones for smaller toys if you like. - Cardboard boxes: https://www.amazon.com/Pratt-Recycled-Corrugated-Cardboard-Standard/dp/B00E81MGGS/ref=pd_sim_328_21 That is a pretty phallic box that will fit bigger toys. Small ones can be stuffed in 4", 5", or 6" cube boxes. Silicone toys can be stuck in a plastic bag and put in the box with no other protection. I might've forgotten a couple small things. Let me know if you notice anything that's in the videos but not in the list.
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Aug 10, 2016 23:29
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ExecuDork posted:Or a beta emitter. It would be better to put your beta (or neutron) emitter in a bottle of lube included as a freebie with the toy. Just an ounce or so, and then it'll be completely used on the first go-around. I doubt anyone will be running santorum through a mass spectrometer. Wedemeyer posted:We've come such a long way from carving bellends onto sticks picked up off the ground It really is! We're using a platinum-catalyzed polymerization reaction between two synthetic compounds, along with some embedded petrochemical dyes and europium-based phosphorescent crystals. The process involves briefly removing all the air from around the components and curing can be accelerated with a heat gun, both powered by a continent-spanning electrical grid. The raw materials come from every corner of the Earth: hydrocarbons, silica, wood, clay, precious metals, shipped by transports traveling faster than anyone could dream of moving two lifetimes ago. Facilitated by a worldwide network that transmits information at the speed of light, all of these components are prepared, packaged, and then shipped to arrive at our door just as they're needed. And then we stick it up our butts.
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Aug 11, 2016 03:01
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ExecuDork posted:Getting away from murder-by-big-hard-dick chat, did you ever include lube or anything else as a freebie? Did you have any kind of customer-loyalty or rewards program? I don't have any good way to make or bottle lube, so not really, but I did order lube from Amazon and mail it to an international customer who couldn't get it themselves. I do put in freebies: a silicone fish or two in nice colors. See, it's a good plan to mix more silicone than you actually need for a toy. That way, if you underestimate or spill a bit, you don't have to make a second batch and fret over the colors being slightly different. In most cases, this results in you having an extra 25-50mL of colored, degassed silicone when you're done pouring the toy. Just dump that into a chocolate mold. I have some fish-shaped chocolate molds, so if someone orders a pink dong with blue sparkles, they'll probably get a pink fish with blue sparkles along with it. These fish also make good firmness samples for someone who is wondering which firmness they should go with.  For customer loyalty programs, I didn't have anything official, but I was a lot more accommodating and generous toward repeat customers. I'd accept more difficult projects (tons of stripes, painted toys, tubes) as well. It's probably horrible, but I used to be really trusting of everyone and gradually learned that nobody deserves immediate trust; if they've been with you for a while, you can start to open up and take on more risk. The Lone Badger posted:How does a new fantasy-dildo begin? Do you sit there with a sketchpad "Hmmm, what if I made one with a knob here and a series of ridges here... Typically I would get orders from the commissioner. They can be as vague as "like your other toy but shorter and pointy," or they can be a fully fleshed out 3D model. Pencil sketches seem to be the most popular. So long as I have some idea of what to do, plus dimensions, I can make the clay model and send them a picture. They suggest changes, if any, and then it goes into production. 3D renderings or photo references are the easiest to work with. You just have to be careful because, like with art, some people are really picky and won't be satisfied until every last dimple matches their Blender model. Most customers who are willing to commission a brand new toy have a pretty good idea of what they want and what would feel good. There are some exceptions. One toy, well... I'll let you see for yourself.  There are some toys I've designed completely on my own. I'll admit, since I don't really use them myself, I made some mistakes at first and gradually learned what makes a good hole-filler. On top of that, some toys really can't be poured without trapping air bubbles. Degassing mitigates this somewhat (the silicone will absorb small bubbles after being poured), but some designs are just hopeless.
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Aug 11, 2016 12:20
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The silicone is squishy and would, uh... well, I can't say it would feel comfortable because the customer told me afterward that the design was overzealous and he hadn't been able to use it.
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Aug 11, 2016 22:02
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Fauxtool posted:i think i could have told him that without having to use it. The smallest protrusions I've successfully poured are the scales on the base of one of my toys, about as small and sharp as a pencil tip. I haven't done anything with hairlike projections because they would be very tough to pour without entrapping bubbles. Might be able to get little nubs 1mm in diameter and ~5mm long without problems. Anything narrower or longer is less likely to work. As for how thin you can make it, I think that the elongation at break is more important than the ultimate strength. For example, a 1/4" diameter cylinder of Dragon Skin 10 can technically support a weight of about 22 pounds before breaking. As you load it, though, it will stretch to 10x its original length. In typical use, you will not have an opportunity or a reason to stretch a toy that much. The only time I've ever torn silicone was when it got scratched or cut, which concentrates strain in much the same way that cracks in metal do. For practical purposes, mostly just to avoid entrapping air as you pour silicone, I'd avoid making any neck narrower than 1/2". Here are the material properties of the silicone I use: Dragon Skin 20: 620% elongation at break, tensile strength 550psi Dragon Skin 10: 1000% elongation at break, tensile strength 475psi Ecoflex 00-50: 980% elongation at break, tensile strength 315psi Ecoflex 00-20: 845% elongation at break, tensile strength 160psi (making it the most vulnerable to tearing at small cross-sections)
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Aug 12, 2016 00:43
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The Lone Badger posted:Why is it called Dragonskin? Did they know people were going to be using it to make dragondongers? You'd have to ask Smooth-On why they chose that name, though I'd reckon it has something to do with the special effects business. I mentioned earlier that the most popular ones tended to be the cheapest ones. Of those, two in particular were very good sellers: a long one with ridges, bumps, and a knot, and a shorter one with spirals and a knot.   and   Bonus pretty picture: 
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Aug 12, 2016 02:31
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Sethur posted:Is there a reason you couldn't just pre-manufacture a firmer core (maybe just a simple tube or cone shape) and then stick that into the softer silicone as it cures? Will the two parts not bond well or something? It seems like it'd be less wasteful than your first option and easier than your second one, since you don't have to remove the placeholder object, and you could even completely submerge it so you don't potentially have different colorations on the base from the different materials. Since liquid silicone and cured silicone have the same densities, there would be no way to stop it from sinking/tipping/otherwise touching the edges. The PVC pipe is denser (especially if you fill it with coins) and will stay vertical, right where it's pinned. Animale posted:I want to hear about the dildo drama! Did anyone steal your designs? Do those feuding make battle cocks and then hit each other until someone submits? Stealing designs is a gray area, because no two dildo designs are completely identical (with the exception below). Every design that's a dog dick or a horse dick or a human dick will be very similar; it's the tweaks and touches that make them unique. More fanciful designs, like the shark one, are typically not copied because the entire community would come down HARD. The exception is if you are a very big company with a largely oblivious customer base that doesn't care about bad press. I did have someone come up with a design moderately similar to one of mine and asked if I'd be ok with them making it, and I asked them not to. Another person made a similar design to one of mine and didn't ask. Someone else brought it to my attention and was incensed, but really it didn't bother me too much. I'm not going to sue someone over a dildo and have that attached to my name forever. The exception: a dude in Switzerland bought some of my toys along with a bunch of others from other independent makers, then sold them as his own with a ridiculous mark-up. I was kind of fascinated, really - I knew people had been selling my toys used for more than I charged, but this dude was actually claiming he made all these toys. What the hell was his endgame? He could only get one of each to sell, a bunch of other people C&D'd him, and nobody will ever make a toy for him again. For the feuding battle cocks, I've done that with silicone tentacles and it's awesome. Fuckers can leave a mark. BirdOfPlay posted:I know it's a fake dong, but that shark is adorable. Especially it's dopey face. People probably care more about you tentacle and horse/dog inspired dongs, but did you make any others that had that kind of "cuteness"? Absolutely! Have more cute toys:   These almost aren't worth spoilering because of their adorability and lack of phallicity, but I still haven't gotten a mod's ok to post these inline.
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Aug 12, 2016 22:23
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The Lone Badger posted:Do there tend to be significant differences in the design of dildos designed for vaginal and rectal use? Or is it pretty much 'one size fits all'? That is a good question! There are indeed design differences. I didn't have to deal with this toooo much since most of my dongs were customer designs, but those ostensibly for anal use were typically longer and, on the whole, smoother (though there is plenty of variation). Having a stiff dildo longer than seven or eight inches is basically pointless for vaginal use unless you've got a kink for cervical pain. Likewise, if the toy is going to have a knot, anal toys typically have a longer neck between the bottom of the knot and the toy's base. If you're wondering why that is, try taking a knot and then standing up and walking around with it. Some of the most popular vaginal-oriented toys are conical, highly textured, and are intended more for external stimulation. Others have nubs near the tip for g-spot stimulation. One particular toy I made turned out to be extremely effective for that. The original design was done by someone with a vag, so I guess that's why. One last distinction - anal toys tend to have pointy tips so they're easier to insert gradually. Blunt tips are fine for the other hole.
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Aug 12, 2016 22:36
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Anne Whateley posted:Can I ask what percent of your customers were cis women? I think almost all mainstream penetrative sex toys are at least in that range -- it's a relatively reasonable size, plus you have to be able to hold it! It was at least half of them. I guess I should clarify that I meant usable length (a bit of a subjective term), not total length. I do know there's some variability in vaginal depth, though. Good point about the toys without a flared base, but the only ones I make without a flared base are things like eggs and spheres. Just because it's intended for vaginal use doesn't mean someone won't occasionally try the other hole and end up coming after you for hospital bills. Scudworth posted:Look I know you can boil and sterilize silicone several ways but I don't really get it, either. I wouldn't ever want a used toy. But hey, the used toy market is pretty darn big, so there must be plenty of people who do (or just can't afford to pay full price). VanSandman posted:What's the most ridiculous thing you ever made, and what orifice was it designed for? Most ridiculous were the poopdongs, but I refused to make those. The most ridiculous I ever made was the radish. Like I said, it turned out badly, so I don't have any good pictures, but basically it's a 4" sphere with a pair of thin, floppy leaves and a relatively narrow root connecting it to the base. It was for anal use. All of the huge toys I've made were for anal use. Biggest by length: a 5' x 1.5" tentacle - customer managed to take at least half Biggest by width: a 6.1" diameter (over 19" circumference) egg with a robust cord sticking out one end - customer did not manage to take it Biggest by volume: a huge spiny cock - customer took on the first go and pondered commissioning a bigger one Pictures follow. Imagine, if you will, Kirk Johnson swallowing the third one up.    Now the latest in dildotech: remote-controlled, articulated toys with haptic feedback for long-term relationships. One partner gets a fleshlight, the other gets a dildo. They each have servos, vibrators, and pressure sensors. Live remote fucksession with the bonus of being able to use a fantasy dilz or vag.
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Aug 13, 2016 15:15
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sleppy posted:Hahahaha I was not expecting Yoshi's egg attached to a braid for the second one. They all look neat though, and I wouldn't be able to resist flinging the five footer around. When you mention their levels of success, did you have like a reviewing system? Or did these people just like to email you with updates on how far your product went up their butt? I didn't have a set reviewing system since I didn't have a dedicated website. At least one other manufacturer gives a gift certificate for customers who complete a public review, but I already had too many customers to serve properly. Repeat customers and design commissioners typically ended up becoming friends because they're in frequent contact, so I'd hear a lot about the toys. Even one-time customers will sometimes send a PM or email talking about their experiences. The Yoshi egg was different because it was a one-off, and months later, the curiosity had built so much that I just HAD to send a PM and ask.
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Aug 13, 2016 17:41
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Choose Deth posted:How do you get the sort of marbled look that these ones have? The blue one looks pretty neat. It's all a matter of your pouring methodology. I should be releasing a video today on marbling techniques, so I guess you picked a good time to ask! Essentially, you just get your two colors, one bowl in each hand, and go back and forth with your pouring. You move the bowls around so you're not pouring from the same angle all the time (otherwise you get a zigzag pattern). The smaller the amount you pour at a time, the finer the marbling will be. Another manufacturer, DamnAverage, does some incredibly detailed marbling. The trick is not to let the silicone drip down the sides of the mold as you do it, which is incredibly difficult with a slender dong like this. It takes a lot of technique, especially with more viscous silicone, to keep that from happening. For the toy on the right, combine that technique with another trick: putting multiple colors in the same bowl. If you have a small amount of one strongly colored silicone, and you pour slowly to keep the flow laminar, it makes that thin stripy look you see near the tip.
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Aug 14, 2016 16:28
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Soylent Yellow posted:You mentioned hospital bills earlier, possibly jokingly. Is serious injury/death by dildo a common occurrence? Have you ever refused to make a design for safety reasons? That would be a better question to ask one of the medical megathreads. They mention dildo misadventures happen so frequently that they're rarely worth posting. Most serious injuries are caused by people using something not intended for insertion, like eels or glass bottles. Those frequently lead to surgery and, sometimes, death. I don't know of any dildos killing someone, but it's probably happened. I've never refused to make a design for safety reasons; I've just made them safe (adding a flared base, for example, or making them out of soft silicone) and, when necessary, warned the customer against misuse.
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Aug 14, 2016 17:48
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Delivery McGee posted:How much would it cost to get the one Saints' Row weapon made (for cosplay purposes, of course, though I'm sure you could sell a few from the same mold to some of your regular customers)? Hmm... assuming THE PENETRATOR has a 3.5" diameter, that's about 6.2 liters of silicone, or $155. The mold would be pricey, though - at least $300. With that length, you'd probably need a stiff mold made of urethane or something due to the hydrostatic pressure at the bottom. You can modify the stiffness or glossiness as needed. To get the deflection shown in the screencap, take a sawed-off baseball bat, paint it purple, and embed it in the first foot and a half. Fauxtool posted:that 3ft dildo is unrealistically vascular Some people really like veiny dongs, which I don't quite understand. It must feel pretty nice, because otherwise it just looks like worms crawling underneath the skin.
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Aug 15, 2016 12:19
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I just got a dreaded letter from the USPS saying my box of two dildos and a pint of lube going to a friend in England got "damaged in handling." Normally, they send back the damaged box. All I got was the cardboard front panel. Looks like I gotta swallow my pride and fill out a claims form, then send it down to Georgia, where I'm pretty sure there are still anti-dildo laws on the books. I guess it's a good thing I put the full value on the customs form, otherwise I might not get anything back. Blue Wher posted:It is rare in this day and age I find out about a fetish that absolutely freaks me out. This one is appalling and frightening. I am impressed. Bravo. Some folks purposely induce the vaginal equivalent with a suction cup. Sleep well~
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Aug 17, 2016 00:37
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Wedemeyer posted:On that note: has anyone ever asked you to make a dildo that's assumably copyrighted? Like a dick based off the Capra Demon? Yes, people have. I've always said no. Even if it's "just one copy" or "they don't make it anymore," it's entirely unethical. Putting vibes in is as simple as putting a void into the base. Then you get a bullet vibrator online and stuff it in the crevice. If it's a particularly cheap toy and you're not worried about preserving it, you could cut a slit into an intact silicone toy and stuff one in there. Now if you actually want a vibrator built in, things get a bit trickier. You can get some very cheap cell phone vibrator motors online and wire up a simple circuit with a switch and a battery pack, but those are super weak. I'd still rather buy the bullet and embed it in the silicone as it's curing. If you spray a little release agent, it could be taken out and replaced as needed.
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Aug 17, 2016 00:50
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Naerasa posted:But yeah, great threat OP. I used to do resin modeling with Smooth-On products and it never once occurred to me that I could be using them to make dildos. Talk about a wasted opportunity... Oh, I still haven't told the story of how Smooth-On called me at work! I can get to that this afternoon. Wedemeyer posted:MY god, you can copyright dildos? Huh. I suppose that makes sense. Like in many other fields, a lot of it comes down to how good your lawyer is. Current thinking (at least on Tumblr) is that you can't make a clone of a toy, or one with all the same basic features unless It is visually distinguishable. You can't name a toy the same thing as someone else has. "Ovipositor," "chimaera," "hybrid," all that stuff is taken so you need to be creative. The exception here is toys modeled directly off animals: if you're making a horse or dog dildo, it's going to look like the real thing, and that's a clear-cut case of prior art. Now here's where it gets weird: some artists and their fans are also very protective of color schemes. I got some hatemail because I made a toy that was... red, black, and silver, I think, and unbeknownst to me, that was someone else's signature color scheme. Seems ridiculous to me, but then again, you can copyright and sell colors... Wedemeyer posted:How big was your operation in general? Just you or did you enlist some coworkers into the dildo army? It was about 90% me and 10% my wife. At my peak I was making 3-5 a day after work which ate up an hour or two on top of my other two jobs. I considered hiring someone (a lot of people online even asked me for a job) but then I'd have to worry about a lot more paperwork and regulations. The drama, though, is unending. I made a Five Nights at Freddy's themed toy by request and someone got very upset because the puppets in FNAF have the souls of children and I was condoning pedophilia. There is all kinds of random BS like that. I'm very glad you like the thread  kaschei posted:Are suction cup bases possible with simple molds or do those require special equipment? They are super easy. Drop anything round and buoyant into the silicone once it's been poured into the mold. I use custard dishes in a couple different sizes, as well as a PVC pipe cap for small toys. Suction cups take thirty seconds of effort, tops, and nobody should be charging extra for them. elise the great posted:I just want you to know that this thread has made my (horrified, fascinated, vaguely nauseated) day and I salute you, fellow purveyor of admittedly very different filth. Holy poo poo, how did I gross you out, Elise? Honored to have you post here! Elf cock, hmm? Depends on the race. If we're talking LotR elves, yeah, sparkly and pale would work. I could use the flesh pigment and add some white mica to achieve those effects. As for the design, add some flashy metallic accents in the shape of leaves, maybe have a pointy tip like their ears. You could actually make a whole line of LotR-themed toys. Glow-in-the-dark blue Sting, a squirting toy with little spines modeled after Shelob, a big fat bumpy orc cock (wait, that's already been done), even Sauron's finger (with or without The Ring) would be a pretty cool shape. Of course, demand for each of these would be overshadowed by the Shadowfax - both in flared and unflared flavors. Pondex posted:It's probably like the most amazing sparkly dick you ever saw but it's only 2 inches long. Maybe it's long but super skinny and prehensile. Got twigs and bark growing on it, often mistaken for branches. Great camo when you're a voyeur hiding in a tree. Dildomancer fucked around with this message at 12:24 on Aug 17, 2016 |
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Aug 17, 2016 12:20
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And seriously, what the hell drama could there be about making dildos? Orgasms are such a happy business!
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Carth Dookie posted:Dildomancer make the elfcock and post it TIA I could totes do that, but threads in A/T don't get goldmined. Gibbo posted:Do you like to name your creations or is it just "Order number 428, the Christmas tree one"? They've all got names. Sometimes the best you can do is name it something generic, or name it after whoever commissioned it. elise the great posted:I'm deathly curious about this ovipositor thing. Is it just a dong-shaped thing with a female bug-parts name? Is it associated with the giant egg thing? Like, obviously it's not gonna lay eggs in your butt, so what makes the difference between an ovipositor and an orc dick or whatever? Your heart already knows the answer, even if your mind does not believe it. elise the great posted:Also is most of the drama just kink policing and ~problematic callouts~ and tumblr bullshit, or does it get darker and uglier than that? I can see custom dildo sales having a really unpleasant doxxing problem. It is MOSTLY Tumblr bullshit, thankfully. I did my best to delete stuff that people complained about because I was already getting a lot of hatemail and my real name was on every package I mailed out. If I'd thought things through a little better, I'd have gotten an LLC and a PO box, but I had no idea it was ever going to be anything more than a quirky hobby. Pile of Kittens posted:IIRC they're made of gelatin so they melt at body temperature and don't poison you. There are silicone eggs as well. And glass eggs, if you're feeling extra adventurous~ I've never trusted glass dildos. People tell me they're safe, but I can just picture slipping in the tub, and then some poor surgeon has to perform emergency bowel resection along with exploratory glass removal. Speaking of which, sbaldrick posted:try anal prolapse porn, it's a thing. I have been told that the 1 guy 1 jar video was intentional, and he was simply acting out his fetish. Very little would surprise me anymore.
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Aug 17, 2016 22:10
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and goldmine imo)
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Choose Deth posted:Do you have to keep tabs on what other people are making? Or do you just not purposely copy others' toys and hope that things sort themselves out? Because it seems like there would be a lot to keep track of if you wanted to make sure you didn't accidentally make something similar to another person's design. Since I've never really been in the market for toys, I have very little idea what's out there. I've probably got a passing knowledge of the most popular toys. I trust the people who give me designs not to just copy something from someone else (and you can often tell when someone does), but it's entirely possible they could be replicating an existing design without knowing it. Ultimately, I would know if I made a copy or near-copy of another toy if I posted a picture of the finished clay model and got my rear end flamed off on Tumblr. Short story: it actually happened to me once, but the circumstances were unusual. I held a design contest: a bunch of people make designs, I let folks vote on the most popular, I make it and give the winner a free copy. Made it, thing looks goddamn fantastic, but then I got a couple confused/angry notes. It turned out that the winning design had also been proposed as a design for another manufacturer before the designer submitted it to my contest. The other manufacturer never actually made it into a toy AFAIK, so there was no real conflict, but that could've become very awkward. I emailed their head and explained what'd happened and there was no lasting drama or hurt feelings. I wish it were easier to be proactive about not copying a design. Someone commissioned a toy with a piercing from me, and I figured that was a popular request, so I asked on Tumblr what kind of piercings had already been done - and got several ANGRY (literally shaking) replies. To paraphrase one of them, "How loving DARE you pretend like you don't know about ____'s toy! You're just trying to put them out of business you FUCKER!" Stories like those are the main reason I don't sell dildos anymore. They're fun to make for friends, on occasion, but I can't deal with people bitching me out over imagined slights. The whole community is eighty percent hugbox and twenty percent nitroglycerine.
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Aug 18, 2016 21:47
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kaschei posted:Do you mean that the idea of pierced junk is off limits to any dildo maker who cares what tumblr thinks? Or was it a specific design that was quite similar to another's? People just assumed I was asking not so that I could avoid stepping on toes, but so that I could copy other designs. You're fine if you do a piercing that hasn't been done. Hell, if it's a common type of piercing, you could probably do that with no problems as long as the dick it's on isn't a copy. This is just a situation where I stepped blindly into a minefield.
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Aug 18, 2016 22:30
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dog days are over posted:As someone flat broke this sounds stupidly appealing as a business fuuucckk It's not going to solve an imminent cash flow problem due to the initial capital outlay and the slow growth of your customer base. But once things get going, yeah, it has the opportunity to be lucrative.
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Aug 19, 2016 00:26
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Sethur posted:Did you have previous experience in clay modeling, or did you just start from nothing and discover it's not that hard? I just feel like if I tried this I'd spend hundreds of dollars on equipment and materials and then end up unintentionally making nothing but "realistic turd" dildos. I've always had a bit of a knack for clay modeling, origami, sculpting, that sort of thing. If you doubt your talents, well, you can grab that 1.75-pound block of Sculpey posted upthread and find out. You will also want a friend or two who like dildos to judge your design.
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Aug 19, 2016 00:48
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What's the weirdest object you can think of putting in your butt (preferably with a flared base)? Someone's probably made a dildo out of it. I've seen soda bottles, including Bawls, which has a neat texture, vegetables, dice... I doubt anyone's made a serrated knife or a shuriken, at least not for insertion, but I wouldn't be shocked if it existed.
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Aug 20, 2016 16:01
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fordham posted:Do you put in vents/valves to release the vacuum? Silicone seems like it'd make a pretty good seal. I'm not sure what you mean. The silicone is put in the vacuum chamber when it's still in the mixing bowl, then poured into the mold. You would need a big vacuum chamber to fit the entire mold, and besides, you want a high surface area to volume ratio for degassing. Moreover, I put a tiny mold in a vacuum chamber to degas as it cured once, and the results were extremely bad. Oodles posted:A shrunken head Hmmm! That is an interesting idea.
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Aug 20, 2016 18:32
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DroneRiff posted:I think it was in the "vents to make sure you can actually get the dildo out of your butt" thing. Which gave me the image of a butt plug with a huge thing like the Value logo. Ohhhh. No, you don't need vents for that. Technically silicone is airtight, but your colon is plenty flexible and can collapse around it to avoid creating any real vacuum. Where people mostly have problems is when they can't relax their sphincter enough to pull the toy out. At this point, some people panic, which doesn't help matters. But if you can fit something in your butt, with patience, you can almost always get it out. Fully insertable toys, like eggs, are another issue entirely. The problem with those is, if your body can't do its natural thing and squeeze it out, you have to fit a hand in there and try to grip it despite all the lube and other unpleasant things surrounding your prize. At that point, some people make the mistake of grabbing barbecue tongs or pliers, but I'm sure Elise and her comrades in the medical stories thread can tell you that this is not a good move. Your best bet is a medical speculum and a jaded proctologist.
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Aug 20, 2016 19:42
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Sethur posted:On that note, I've never entirely understood how eggs or the like are supposed to get stuck up there; after all, your colon and anus are made to expel items. I can understand that elongated things like dildos could sort of get wedged sideways and thus jammed, but a smooth elongated oblong shape seems like the absolutely perfect shape to pass smoothly through. It's something I've witnessed firsthand, though it was vaginal in this case. It's mostly psychology. We don't have perfect control over our muscles, and when we're worried or panicking, things just clench up. On top of it, depending on the shape, lateral squeezing could push something in deeper. You could also insert an egg narrow-end-first and then have its blunter end stuck against a reluctant sphincter. But yeah, someone medically inclined can probably explain it better. Dildomancer fucked around with this message at 22:20 on Aug 20, 2016 |
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Aug 20, 2016 22:14
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Here is the story of how my coworkers found out about my hobby. ~~ I work in a pretty normal office environment, open floorplan with some chest-high dividers between desks. In other words, there isn't a lot of privacy, especially when it comes to phone conversations. After ordering a couple rounds of materials from Smooth-On, I made an account on their website to simplify checkout. Part of this was the phone number, which I expected was just for verifying credit card ownership or calling if there's a problem with an order. I was wrong. After spending a few thousand bucks on silicone, I got a phone call at work. In a total breach of office etiquette, I answered the phone at my desk instead of running into the break room.  "Hey, this is Doug at Reynolds Advanced Materials. I see you've been ordering a lot of stuff from Smooth-On."Uh-oh. "What are you using all that silicone for? Maybe we can help you out."I think it took me a solid 20 seconds to unplug my phone and speedwalk into the kitchen, trying to keep my voice as quiet as possible all the while.  "Uhh, I can't really talk about that, I'm at work right now..."That was about the worst thing to say, because it guaranteed all sorts of questions when I got back to my desk. I'd like to say I deftly dodged them, but the truth is closer to me just blushing and mumbling, "none of your business..." Doug had some good news, though: ordering through Reynolds instead of Smooth-On would get me the same stuff at the same price, but with quicker shipping since their warehouse is closer. He later came to visit the dildo factory (read: apartment), which was a little weird, but his wife makes sex toys, too, so we had some tips to share. ~~ Months later, and it's the office Christmas party. I'm sitting next to my boss and his boss in a nice Italian place. Folks are a bit drunk, we're done with dinner and waiting on the tiramisu, and... my phone rings. Welp. "Hey, it's Doug! How are you doing? Dildo business must be booming with how much you've been ordering!" "Hi man, look, I'm at dinner right now and can't talk." "Oh I'm sorry, look, I'll be down in your area, how about if I come over tonight and we can go over some new products?" "Yeah I guess so, I've got a couple things I'm interested in. I gotta go now, though."I don't know whether my coworkers heard what Doug said, but their conversations had completely stopped, and I was the new center of attention. I headed off the inevitable question with my pre-emptive strike: "Oh, that was my supplier." Now you have a pretty good idea of how smooth and witty I am in person. Thanks to my stupidity, half the office assumed I was a drug dealer, so I spilled the beans quietly to my boss and the guy who sat at the desk next to me. It didn't take long for word to get around, and I don't think there's anyone in the office who doesn't know about my hobby. I get teased sometimes, but I don't think anyone really cares. Thank goodness. Dildomancer fucked around with this message at 02:14 on Aug 23, 2016 |
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Aug 23, 2016 02:11
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| # ¿ Apr 27, 2024 09:48 |
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Wedemeyer posted:Why didn't you say supplier of tiles or sheetrock or something as if you're repairing your apartment? You big goofball. Strange how everyone went straight to 'Dildomancer does drugs'. These were not my finest moments. And the dildos are mostly in a big box right in front of the door as you come in. It's always fun when someone comes to visit and there are towels over a bunch of shelves and boxes.
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Aug 23, 2016 02:45
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