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ohsosad posted:If you really thought this movie was bad you are pretty gay but thats alright because together in one great gay commentary we can <3 each other because lets be honest its the best horror movie in the last few years. it wasnt scary
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Aug 14, 2016 16:59
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Who gets scared by a movie anymore? I'm only addressing this question to adults
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Aug 14, 2016 17:01
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Cymoril posted:Also As Above, So Below is the best horror film. lmao
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Aug 14, 2016 17:15
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Lol
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Aug 14, 2016 17:20
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Toadvine posted:Who gets scared by a movie anymore? I don't think I've ever watched a horror movie to be scared, even when I was a kid. It's more for the creeps. Like, Solaris has a sort of the creepy vibe going on, albeit much more serene than the kind you get from a horror movie. But parts of The Ring freaked me out when it was released. IT is the scariest movie of all time for me, but of course, I was a kid when I first saw it. I might be biased. Also, some of the best horror movies of all time are meant to be disturbing more than scary. Like Eraserhead or as an example of a kinda hybrid style, The Shining. Tideland gets mixed reviews but it also disturbed the poo poo out of me.
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Aug 14, 2016 17:26
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The only thing that scares me is the passage of time and its unrelenting assault on the human body and mind.
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Aug 14, 2016 17:35
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Cabin in the Woods was certainly thrilling in the second half, and had enough odd elements in the first half to be suspenseful and mysterious
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Aug 14, 2016 17:36
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SouthLAnd posted:The only thing that scares me is the passage of time and its unrelenting assault on the human body and mind. Haunting indeed. 
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Aug 14, 2016 17:36
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Is this movie on Netflix?
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Aug 14, 2016 18:38
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Haha I have a mortgage and kids I need to feed and adult responsibilities and if I lose my job we're hosed and we dlive in a world w. global warming, terror, economic recession and the non-zero risk of me or my wife getting cancer at age 40 or us both dying in a car crash leaving our children alone in the world.
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Aug 14, 2016 18:42
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I mean like what the gently caress kind of horror movie could ever be as scary as being an adult person w. Uh, a freaking witch in the TV and there's a monster in the well . Big woop. Meanwhile if I lose my job we're losing the house and if I gently caress up my marriage I won't get to see my kids like 50% of the time for the rest of my life and will be completely alone.
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Aug 14, 2016 18:43
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Minimalist Program posted:I mean like what the gently caress kind of horror movie could ever be as scary as being an adult person w. Uh, a freaking witch in the TV and there's a monster in the well . Big woop. Meanwhile if I lose my job we're losing the house and if I gently caress up my marriage I won't get to see my kids like 50% of the time for the rest of my life and will be completely alone. Yes that is the true horror story. But is this movie on Netflix?
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Aug 14, 2016 18:52
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Minimalist Program posted:I mean like what the gently caress kind of horror movie could ever be as scary as being an adult person w. Uh, a freaking witch in the TV and there's a monster in the well . Big woop. Meanwhile if I lose my job we're losing the house and if I gently caress up my marriage I won't get to see my kids like 50% of the time for the rest of my life and will be completely alone. Good points, but have you seen something like The Shining? You experience the horror vicariously. It's like, what if that guy in the TV were you? Rly makes u think
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Aug 14, 2016 18:52
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Colonel Cancer posted:Cabin in the Woods is probably the best horror movie of 21st century so far tbh THE DOG HOUSE posted:yeah it is. like by far. someone probably beat me to it but...it follows.
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Aug 14, 2016 18:57
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Kuato posted:Good points, but have you seen something like The Shining? You experience the horror vicariously. It's like, what if that guy in the TV were you? Rly makes u think HAha but at least that dude died like a couple days after going insane and losing his family. Meanwhile my life is such that if I have a mental breakdown due to stress and go insane and lose my family, I get to live for another 50-60 years completely alone and w/o my kids or wife, and my kids will be hurt and traumatized by the experience and carry that with them into their adult lives and repeat the cycle,.. haha.
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Aug 14, 2016 19:01
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Minimalist Program posted:HAha but at least that dude died like a couple days after going insane and losing his family. Meanwhile my life is such that if I have a mental breakdown due to stress and go insane and lose my family, I get to live for another 50-60 years completely alone and w/o my kids or wife, and my kids will be hurt and traumatized by the experience and carry that with them into their adult lives and repeat the cycle,.. haha. So you're saying the forever alone, never leave mom's basement crowd are the lucky ones?
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Aug 14, 2016 19:03
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I am so freaking scared because a big lizard is stomping around down town los angeles and not because global warming and the collapse of late-stage capitalism in the west is going to cause me to lose my job whilst millions of middle-eastern refugees swarm europe, effectively destroying every welfare state between here and turkey and ruining my children's ability to live a life that is even half as safe and comfortable as the one that I've known.
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Aug 14, 2016 19:05
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Facebook Aunt posted:So you're saying the forever alone, never leave mom's basement crowd are the lucky ones? The lucky ones are the dudes and dudettes who get hatcheted while they're young and having hot steamy sex in a bath tub.
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Aug 14, 2016 19:05
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Who the gently caress needs to watch a scary movie with a japanese teenage girl in a night gown to feel fear, when there's a real and non-zero chance that some day I will be in a public place with my wife and kids and get into a fight trying to defend them from 2-4 drunkards who singled us out out of boredom and I will get stabbed and beaten whilst one of them holds my wife and my kids look on and nobody does anything due to the bystander effect and for like half a year after my youngest kid won't even dare to leave the house or sleep in her own bed.
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Aug 14, 2016 19:08
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And that kid's name was Batman
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Aug 14, 2016 19:14
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Minimalist Program posted:I am so freaking scared because a big lizard is stomping around down town los angeles and not because global warming and the collapse of late-stage capitalism in the west is going to cause me to lose my job whilst millions of middle-eastern refugees swarm europe, effectively destroying every welfare state between here and turkey and ruining my children's ability to live a life that is even half as safe and comfortable as the one that I've known. Global warming is as fictional as giant lizards and boogie men FYI. 
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Aug 14, 2016 19:16
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fyi Cabin in the Woods was mostly a comedy you fuckin rear end holes and it was funny + good-ish, even if it was made by joss wedonMinimalist Program posted:Who the gently caress needs to watch a scary movie with a japanese teenage girl in a night gown to feel fear, when there's a real and non-zero chance that some day I will be in a public place with my wife and kids and get into a fight trying to defend them from 2-4 drunkards who singled us out out of boredom and I will get stabbed and beaten whilst one of them holds my wife and my kids look on and nobody does anything due to the bystander effect and for like half a year after my youngest kid won't even dare to leave the house or sleep in her own bed. Some of us don't live in the USA, or the Middle-East. Or South America. Or Asia. Or Africa. Or Europe.
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Aug 14, 2016 19:29
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Minimalist Program posted:Who the gently caress needs to watch a scary movie with a japanese teenage girl in a night gown to feel fear, when there's a real and non-zero chance that some day I will be in a public place with my wife and kids and get into a fight trying to defend them from 2-4 drunkards who singled us out out of boredom and I will get stabbed and beaten whilst one of them holds my wife and my kids look on and nobody does anything due to the bystander effect and for like half a year after my youngest kid won't even dare to leave the house or sleep in her own bed. There was some horror movie a while back, The Strangers or some such, that purported to be based on a true story. The gimmick was that these masked teenagers broke into a cabin and presumably visited all sorts of mental and physical violence upon the female occupant. When asked why they did it, they said "because you were at home". poo poo like that actually happens. While most violence follows a planning continuum against a targeted person, there's times when, for no reason at all, a person or group of people decide "let's hurt / rape / kill this complete stranger". And that poo poo legit terrifies me. Part of what I do for a living is threat assessment. That guy that threatened to shoot the HR rep who fired him, how likely is he to do it? Was he blowing off steam or is he loading the gun as we speak? And there are numbers you can crunch, factors you can account for that are reasonably reliable... But not always. Because sometimes, for seemingly no reason at all... "We did it because you were home."
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Aug 14, 2016 19:33
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I think you can be scared of that happening in real life and also find movies like that to be silly, which that movie most certainly was. It was full of that thing that really annoys me in horror movies where people wear masks where they just tilt their heads with their masks and it's supposed to be so spooky. They did a ton of that in the second/third purge movies too.
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Aug 14, 2016 19:45
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the strangers is very very very very very loosely based on this https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keddie_murders the thing and alien are scary as hell and neither of them could possibly happen. are the only scary movies jaws and ones about serial killers?
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Aug 14, 2016 20:16
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Applewhite posted:Much less one that released the monsters into the facility? When would that ever be useful or desirable? you should go ask SMG in this thread, OP
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Aug 14, 2016 20:24
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Groovelord Neato posted:the strangers is very very very very very loosely based on this No my point was not that "only real horror movies with killers and sharks that can happen in real life are scary" it's that scary movies in general are not and can never be as scary as just being a responsible adult.
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Aug 14, 2016 20:36
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Murphy Brownback posted:I'm just glad nobody is saying Babadook is the best horror movie of the millenium like tons of people were when it first came out. That is one of the most unpleasant experiences (and not because it was scary) in recent memory for me from a horror movie. Oh my god, agreed. I bet it really resonates with post pardum depression moms or something but I kinda wanted every main character in that film to die
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Aug 14, 2016 20:37
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i'm about to purge my bowels all over this thread
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Aug 14, 2016 20:36
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Minimalist Program posted:No my point was not that "only real horror movies with killers and sharks that can happen in real life are scary" it's that scary movies in general are not and can never be as scary as just being a responsible adult. idk I feel like being an adult is pretty easy just don't have kids 
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Aug 14, 2016 20:42
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Applewhite posted:Did they ever explain why "Upstairs" rerouted the tunnel collapse power? They just meant it was re-routed by someone not below - (the pothead/fool guy on the ground level)
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Aug 14, 2016 20:47
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Moridin920 posted:idk I feel like being an adult is pretty easy It's actually pretty easy with kids, too. The trick is not wasting time worrying about anything that isn't actually happening to you at the moment.
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Aug 14, 2016 20:50
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Crash_N_Burn posted:Oh my god, agreed. I bet it really resonates with post pardum depression moms or something but I kinda wanted every main character in that film to die Oh god i think im gonna kill my child: the movie. What a thoroughly unpleasant experience. Kid's lucky he had a pretty loving mom. If I was his single dad he would have ended up in a shallow grave 30 minutes into the movie.
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Aug 14, 2016 20:55
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I purged.
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Aug 14, 2016 20:55
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Shakill OReal posted:Where the movie really messed up was how the pothead chose to not die to save the world, since usually stoners are all depressed and suicidal from addiction. Stoners are also libertarians so a dork with a bong who refuses to sacrifice him for the total good totally makes sense
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Aug 14, 2016 21:00
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Like tbh the stoner dude lived like 30 minutes longer than he would have if he sacrificed himself and it only cost the human race a thousand years of darkness and despair. Rational actors indeed
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Aug 14, 2016 21:02
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Business Gorillas posted:Like tbh the stoner dude lived like 30 minutes longer than he would have if he sacrificed himself and it only cost the human race a thousand years of darkness and despair. Rational actors indeed SMG alt account spotted
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Aug 14, 2016 21:13
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why didnt they just drop a nuke on the giant "old gods" 
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Aug 14, 2016 21:14
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Slither is the best 21st century horror movie ya bunch of dinguses. Also it was funnier than Cabin in the Woods, and used the best part of Joss Whedon-dom, which is Nathan Filion
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Aug 14, 2016 23:18
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gently caress off with your bullshit
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Aug 15, 2016 00:02
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