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Aug 17, 2016 06:06
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Happy Forums Birthday 
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Aug 17, 2016 07:29
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Can we take all this energy and focus it on inventing time travel so we can go back in time to kill Hitler. This will likely prevent the birth of applewhite
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Aug 17, 2016 07:29
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haha yeah that dude applewhite yeah that crazy wait... Who?
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Aug 17, 2016 07:29
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hth posted:who he's the krusty grill guy
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Aug 17, 2016 08:45
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Why? Apple White makes some interesting threads about teleportation and stuff.
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Aug 17, 2016 09:52
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Distract him with a laser pointer and then hit him with a Plasma Cannon.
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Aug 17, 2016 12:04
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Saint Isaias Boner posted:i hear that if you kill applewhite you become him do it and then finish his cyoa
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Aug 17, 2016 12:15
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Applewhite I think it's about time for another CYOA, I don't want to hear poo poo about your irl obligations! 
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Aug 17, 2016 13:05
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Say Nothing posted:He should die in the manner of his threads - you may only use your avatar to kill him. I dont know, this might net me a probation or two...
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Aug 17, 2016 13:06
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did anyone kill applewhite yet?
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Aug 17, 2016 13:06
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Isn't Applewhite one of those lovely cyberpunk animes from the 90s?
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Aug 17, 2016 13:07
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I have killed Applewhite
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Aug 17, 2016 13:09
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not cool
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Aug 17, 2016 13:10
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Hector Beerlioz posted:I have killed Applewhite I'm not dead... just very, very badly burned...
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Aug 17, 2016 13:10
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Zzulu posted:not cool You're right, it was pretty hot
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Aug 17, 2016 13:09
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Hector Beerlioz posted:I have killed Applewhite the applewhite is dead. long live the applewhite
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Aug 17, 2016 13:11
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Applewhite posted:I'm not dead... just very, very badly burned... quiet you
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Aug 17, 2016 13:11
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Zzulu posted:not cool Sorry Zzulu but your avatar isn't done yet. I wasted a lot of time learning to do pixel art and it sucked so much dick I deleted the work. I'm just gonna do something simple and hand drawn.
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Aug 17, 2016 13:12
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looks like he'll never be the head of a major corporation because of his low intelligence and lack of soft social skills also his head is cut off
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Aug 17, 2016 13:13
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Applewhite must die. He is a worshiper of the Corpse Emperor.
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Aug 17, 2016 13:41
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Mycroft Holmes posted:Applewhite must die. He is a worshiper of the Corpse Emperor. there is no dog, only chaos
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Aug 17, 2016 13:47
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Got dang, how many dicks I gotta suck to get an Appletar?
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Aug 17, 2016 14:01
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Ben Smash posted:Got dang, how many dicks I gotta suck to get an Appletar? send a PM to user 4outof5, he'll take out a payday loan against his disability check to buy you a sweet 'tar.
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Aug 17, 2016 14:39
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looks like ol' applewhgite will newver be the head of a major corporation, probably a minor one as well tbqh
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Aug 17, 2016 14:44
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im murdered him w my fart hehe
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Aug 17, 2016 14:57
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I'll hire Space Tits to do it.
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Aug 17, 2016 15:00
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As the contest known as the Scarlet Blade reached its final round, Cyrius himself stepped into the arena against Applewhite. The Lord Commander intended to teach the preening champion his place and cement his own position as Fulgrim's favoured son in the process. Clad in baroque artificer armour painted with obscene dreamscapes and wielding a twelve-foot power spear, Cyrius made for an impressive opponent indeed. The Lord Commander was every bit as fast as his chosen foe. Applewhite fought hard to get within the reach of the power spear, ducking and rolling with fluid grace. Weapons clashed and clanged in a staccato blur. Though Applewhite's blade was sharp as a razor, it could not penetrate Cyrius's ornate battle plate, and for his part the swordsman was wearing little more than a sleeved tunic. A well-placed kick from Cyrius sent Applewhite sprawling backwards, coughing blood. A stab of the power spear took a finger from Applewhite's sword hand. Less than a second later, a sidelong blow from the power spear’s haft sent starbursts across the swordsman's vision. Each fresh wound had sent Applewhite giggling with glee. Cyrius bared his teeth, slashing and jabbing as his opponent laughed, staggered and whirled across the scarlet sands like a demented marionette. At the last, Applewhite corkscrewed through the air and levelled a decapitating blow right at Cyrius' throat. There was a sudden crack of electrical discharge from the impact, and Applewhite's blade snapped in two. As the crowd howled and hollered around him, Lord Commander Cyrius caught his laughing opponent by the throat. Grinning a mirthless smile, he pounded Applewhite into the scarlet sands of the arena until there was nothing left but a red ruin of broken bone. The Emperor’s Children had lost their favoured duellist, but gained a memory to be savoured for years to come. Over the next few weeks, Lord Commander Cyrius underwent a hideous transformation. His mane of hair fell out in clumps, his eyes changed colour, and the copulating figures that decorated his armour writhed and flowed to depict a host of laughing Daemons. To the commander's mounting horror, dark lines appeared under his flesh, pushing outward with each passing night until they formed a dog face. His screams were a source of great interest to his fellow Emperor's Children, but none came to his aid. In the Lord Commander's fate they saw the hand of Slaanesh at work. Some swore that Cyrius' shrieks changed in tone, becoming ever more like maniacal laughter. The next gladiatorial event saw Applewhite stride the sands once more, his power armour adorned with the tortured, moaning face of Cyrius. The heavily scarred swordsman had been reborn, and the Lord Commander had been taken in his place. In the throne at the arena’s edge, Fulgrim smiled knowingly. His master Slaanesh was evidently loath to let such an entertaining protege fall from the mortal coil for long. Since that day, Applewhite has borne a peculiar blessing from his patron, Slaanesh. Whoever takes his chosen champion's life, and finds even a moment of satisfaction from the act, will find themselves undergoing a painful and gradual metamorphosis. When the transformation is almost complete, Applewhite emerges from their discarded shell like a butterfly from a chrysalis. All that remains of his killer will be a screaming face trapped forever in the fleshy panels of his twisted battle plate. Thanks to his peculiar blessing, Applewhite the Eternal has stalked the galaxy for almost ten thousand years. He is a pitiless and sadistic killer who welcomes death with as much passion as he inflicts it upon his foes, and he can only truly be slain by one who has nothing but mercy in his -- or her -- soul. Whether such a being exists in an uncaring universe, only Slaanesh knows, and the secrets of the gods are not meant to be shared. Holy poo poo 40k writing is poo poo-tier bad.
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Aug 17, 2016 15:03
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 booger is killing applewhite
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Aug 17, 2016 16:40
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Professor Shark posted:Applewhite I think it's about time for another CYOA, I don't want to hear poo poo about your irl obligations! The more I think about it, the less funny The Incredibly Broken Girl was probably gonna be. Once Cutejen96 was banned and then banned again it stopped being topical.
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Aug 17, 2016 17:06
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I don't remember any of that, I think you should make one about time travel
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Aug 18, 2016 00:52
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Like make the most convoluted, complicated time travel story ever
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Aug 18, 2016 00:55
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Hey have to go sideways to the future Marty! It's your Great Niece's Uncle!
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Aug 18, 2016 01:01
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Applewhite once complemented an MSPaint I did in one of his threads. I won't defend him but I won't help you people do this. I might even cry at his funeral.
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Aug 18, 2016 01:04
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Saint Isaias Boner posted:did anyone kill applewhite yet? I'm having chainsaw problems. 
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Aug 18, 2016 01:09
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Applewhite is a cool Goon that draws fun pictures. I'm gonna use his spine to whip my sub-human slaves.
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Aug 18, 2016 01:55
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Meltabomb slathered with bacon grease.
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Aug 18, 2016 03:53
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Hector in the kitchen with the candlestick
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Aug 18, 2016 03:54
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I suffocate Applewhite with SpaceTits Tits.
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Aug 18, 2016 04:05
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| # ? May 2, 2024 23:18 |
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Applewhite posted:The more I think about it, the less funny The Incredibly Broken Girl was probably gonna be. Once Cutejen96 was banned and then banned again it stopped being topical. U mean JessicaDupree? or was that CuteJen96 doing a crafty ruse??? If the latter, then wowza! Bruiser knocked that one out of the park!!
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Aug 18, 2016 04:50
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