Newspaper Spider-Man: "Yo, Spider-Man! Down here!"

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Newspaper Spider-Man: "Yo, Spider-Man! Down here!"

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Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

I never realized how many potted plants there were just sitting around the sidewalk in LA.

# ¿ Jun 14, 2017 05:52

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# ¿ May 13, 2024 17:53

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

There are some geckos that can slough off their top layer of skin to escape when a predator grabs them, but Lenny is clearly an armadillo so I don't know why I even mention that.

# ¿ Jun 23, 2017 02:55

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Bruceski posted:

That's actually true. When calculating the gravitational pull of a spherical object on something inside it, the pull from the material above cancels out of the equation. Hmm, how to explain it better without being arsed to do an MSPaint diagram...

Say you have a sphere of radius 1, and an object 0.5 units away from the center. You can divide the sphere into two figures, a sphere of radius 0.5 and a spherical shell going from 0.5 to 1. That shell will pull on the object from all sorts of directions with varying intensities for different parts of it, but if you do the calculus it all cancels out to zero. It's the same sort of calculus trick that lets you count a spherical object as having all its mass at the center for calculating gravitational pull.

Except in the case of the Earth the core is a lot denser than the crust, so I imagine you'd have to get really down far before you got significant effects. Of course that's reality, who knows how a hollow Earth is supposed to work.

quote:

Edit: Also Batman's one weakness is he has to answer a ringing phone.

Man it's a good thing Zsasz didn't think of this like three calls into that Arkham City mission.

# ¿ Jul 15, 2017 02:48

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

Whats wrong with your face!

MJ's agent looks like one of those troll meme faces.

# ¿ Jul 17, 2017 03:50

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

DACK FAYDEN posted:

Peter, he genuinely makes Aunt May happy and he clearly is cool with you. Just call him Melvin, this isn't a "you're not my real Uncle" scenario, he just doesn't want to go by his supervillain name

Yeah Peter, stop deadnaming Melvin.

# ¿ Jul 21, 2017 18:03

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

But for now, off to visit this HO!

# ¿ Aug 5, 2017 02:33

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

if only he had some kind of sixth sense to warn him of threats

Where the hell is that drone? It looks like it's just standing on the grass(?) out in the open five feet behind everyone. And it's not even looking at them. What's going on?

# ¿ Aug 6, 2017 02:52

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Every single wall in the Newspaper Spider-Man universe must have a framed painting hanging on it.

# ¿ Aug 9, 2017 03:00

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Johnny Walker posted:

"My spider sense is throbbing! I better press this engorged wrist pack and spew my hot, sticky webbing all over!"

http://www.clickhole.com/article/everything-you-need-know-about-spider-man-6472

quote:

Spider-Man�s catchphrase is �I�m going to make squirt!� and he screams it before murdering his mortal enemies, union leaders: You can flip open to any issue of Spider-Man over the last 50 years and find a panel where the web-slinger says his signature catchphrase before shooting a load of squirt into the mouths of disgusting union leaders working to organize their workers. Organized workers are the only people who Spider-Man despises more than the Green Goblin.

# ¿ Aug 15, 2017 02:25

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

Lee: Remember dawn scene!
colorist: yeah yeah I know what dawn looks like

Also, the Griffith Observatory is a big clear dome, right, like a greenhouse or something?

# ¿ Aug 16, 2017 02:41

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Oh my god, is that supposed to be an incredibly wide tie?

# ¿ Aug 18, 2017 04:32

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

goatface posted:

It has natural rings in its limbs sized for holding dumpy old men.

That's not a limb...

# ¿ Aug 29, 2017 07:43

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

Its actually more of a dialogue but sure

Mole Man's just looking like someone straight put sunglasses and a wig on a blobfish there.

# ¿ Sep 4, 2017 00:15

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

That's a pretty lovely fountain of youth. You get to live forever, but only if you stay within an hour or so of this particular subterranean chamber. And for that matter, aren't they supposed to be in Mole Melvin's old kingdom right now? What was Tyrannus doing before? Are there just fountains of youth all over the place in subterraria that most people just ignore? Or did Tyrannus just usurp Mole Man's territory, but stay in his own throneroom, presumably unable to visit his new conquest because of the travel time involved?

# ¿ Sep 8, 2017 06:53

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Johnny Walker posted:

What happened to the runoff Fountain of Youth water when the plug was in there? The pool would eventually fill if there's a constant stream, so it must go somewhere.

Obviously it has one of these

# ¿ Sep 20, 2017 02:33

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

I don't think Moleman's said anything or been more than a little head in the corner of a panel for over a week now. It's shameful.

# ¿ Sep 26, 2017 07:08

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

Aw Spidey, so proud to do manual labor

Does whatever a trapdoor spider can.

# ¿ Oct 5, 2017 02:49

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Is that the reason his eyesight's so bad?

# ¿ Oct 8, 2017 07:08

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

At first I thought Aunt May was threatening Melvin with a giant fist.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2017 03:21

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Jerusalem posted:

There is literally MANY THINGS YOU CAN DO Spider-Man

For starters, whatever a spider can.

# ¿ Oct 26, 2017 02:47

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Elfface posted:

If the moloids need Melvin to survive, what did they do before him?

Maybe his secret is that the Moloids are actually his offspring with one of the underground monsters, and they didn't exist before?

# ¿ Oct 30, 2017 05:43

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

You're all over-thinking it, she's on a press tour, she's just going to Miami to be on Good Morning Miami or something. Peter will be returning to New York to start his next "adventure" because god forbid he leave his decrepit aunt's side for more than two hours (or three months in newspaper time).

# ¿ Nov 2, 2017 04:03

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

mind the walrus posted:

Limo driver has some going on.

I think the limo driver's Plastic Man, stretching his face wider.

# ¿ Nov 11, 2017 02:54

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

The MSJ posted:

Has he tried other animals that can regenerate? Like a starfish or flatworm? Or even plants. Curt Connors, transforming into a half-plant thing in the his swamp lab, like some of... Bog Stuff.

Or maybe, and stick with me here, maybe try a salamander? The only vertebrate that can actually regrow a lost limb? As opposed to a lizard, which can only regrow a cartilaginous facsimile of its old tail, and has no limb regenerative properties at all?

# ¿ Nov 21, 2017 05:12

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Alhazred posted:

Is there a reason why he can't get a bionic arm like Misty Knight?

This character kept getting mentioned here so I went to look up who she was

http://marvel.com/characters/37/misty_knight

Jesus Marvel, is that really the best picture to use for her profile page?

# ¿ Nov 22, 2017 06:02

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

They're reacting like that because they don't know how to tell her Dr. Conners hung a NO GIRLS ALLOWED sign at his Everglades clubhouse.

# ¿ Nov 23, 2017 05:53

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

SilverSupernova posted:

You keep pushing for Sabretooth when we should be hoping for Next Time: Welcome Home, Son!

Here's hoping they try to hug a random swamp racoon.

Mikl posted:

LSBSLV
SVMMSRS
CRSSD
RELLLPC
GVTERPS

Who's that last one supposed to be? Based on the way they're abusing the Greek alphabet elsewhere, Guthrps?

Also they seem to think the prescription symbol is an actual Greek letter.

# ¿ Nov 27, 2017 04:57

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Fun fact, there are actually fairly few species of lizard in the Everglades. There are more now because of all the invasive species, but really the only native lizard you'd find in the swamp parts of the Everglades is the green anole. The upland drier parts would have a few skinks and legless lizards, and a gecko, but somehow there ended up being no native aquatic lizards in the swamp. Snakes and turtles are another story.

So what I guess I'm saying is The Lizard is going to end up being defeated by loneliness in that form too.

# ¿ Nov 28, 2017 05:06

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

RIP.

I think that alligator's just perving.

Also nice mom jeans MJ.

# ¿ Dec 4, 2017 06:16

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Synthbuttrange posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_yyvTRVoZQ&t=22s

Gronk seems pretty accurate.

They only make that noise when trying to attract a mate.

Uh oh.

# ¿ Dec 7, 2017 02:09

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Could it be... Florida-Man?

# ¿ Dec 7, 2017 02:23

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Malachite_Dragon posted:

Who do we know that says goofy poo poo like Holy Hannah on the reg?...

Ben Grimm, is that you?

It's a misprint, the gronnking gator's name is Holly Hannah.

# ¿ Dec 11, 2017 06:15

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

We totally should have seen Hulk coming. Just in newspaper-time to tie into Thor Ragnarok!

# ¿ Dec 14, 2017 03:57

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Easiest way to tell, legless lizards have eyelids and snakes don't. So if you're ever unsure if you're holding a snake or a legless lizard, just start poking it in the eye and see what it does.

# ¿ Dec 24, 2017 23:50

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# ¿ May 13, 2024 17:53

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

Push El Burrito posted:

"But what about my guilt?" MJ cries over a dying and bleeding man.

I mean, nothing else has happened for the past week. They must have been really deep in the Everglades.

# ¿ Dec 31, 2017 05:17

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Newspaper Spider-Man: "Yo, Spider-Man! Down here!"

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