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The election coupled with ongoing financial problems seems to have been the final tipping point and my mood for about the last month could best be described as 'nihilistic and unpredictable'. Nothing makes any sense at all and I randomly spend entire days crying or sleeping. I'm finally back to getting work done, but I'm not sure I even care anymore. My mother, whom I would otherwise say is wonderful and decent and with whom I have a good relationship, recently described me in a phone call as being emotionally dead inside, and that's BEFORE this recent turn of mood. My entire life has just been serving as an accessory to a procession of other people. Also the newest cat the household got is a loving rear end in a top hat and is now trying to hump the other (fixed) cats because the vet told us their appointment to get fixed was cancelled and then texted us that the appointment was un-cancelled AFTER the time we were supposed to show up in the first place, so the soonest they could reschedule us is in January. I didn't choose to have these cats, they aren't my cats, but hosed if I don't have to shovel their poo poo and babysit them and then somehow get reverse-guilt-tripped about them because I'm not actively abusing them(?!). Also also I didn't even get any work done today because by the time groceries and social obligations were met it was four-loving-pm in the afternoon and I just lazily sat around playing a lovely roguelike and hating everything. I'm getting older and balder and all I'm achieving is a larger list of things to be angry or bitter over every day. I bought a cheap-rear end bag of salad mix for myself today and that was my splurging for the week because I still need to get bill money ready and because it's the holidays a significant portion of my customers aren't paying up on time.
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Dec 20, 2016 05:33
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Lunchmeat Larry posted:someone put a dishwasher tablet in the coffee machine. wtf Christ, people. 33/33/33 odds on a split between 'IT'LL CLEAN IT DURR', a legit but stupid attempt to kill someone, and 'IT WAS JUST A PRANK BRO'
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Dec 20, 2016 12:36
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