TNF Week 3 - The worst 2-0 team in history faces off with the Patriots

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > TNF Week 3 - The worst 2-0 team in history faces off with the Patriots

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Most Handsome?
	Tom Brady
	Jimmy G
	Brock Osweiler
	Jacoby Brissett
	Tom Savage

Intruder: Mar 5, 2003; I got a taste for blown saves

The New England Patriots (DVOA -15.7%, #23) host the Houston Texans (DVOA -15.8%, #25)

Our exciting QB matchup

Jacoby Brisket

vs Brock Lobster

There was a chance this could be a compelling game with the Texans top notch defense going against the Patriots perpetual eliteness, then the Brady thing happened, then the Jimmy G thing happened, and now it looks like a huge mismatch... or would if Brock hadn't been shaky to this point, if the Texans offensive line weren't a mess, and if the Texans weren't the Texans

# ? Sep 22, 2016 19:31

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# ? May 7, 2024 16:37

Magicpants: Sep 15, 2011; Certified Poster

Tom Brady got 4 games for playing with his balls, but not one player has even been fined for disrespecting America

disgraceful

# ? Sep 22, 2016 19:46

Madcosby: Mar 4, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

#PrayForShoulder

# ? Sep 22, 2016 19:48

Parmesan Basil: Nov 12, 2008; TIME IS THE FIRE IN WHICH WE BURN THE GAME CLOCK

Texans will win and will win easily. 28-9 is the final score. Belichick and Brady must be stopped before they poison the NFL any more than they already have. Ideally, both are excommunicated and tried for crimes against the sport!

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:04

Mel Mudkiper: Jan 19, 2012; At this point, Mudman abruptly ends the conversation. He usually insists on the last word.

I petition Jacoby be renamed Beef

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:06

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

I hope I get to watch this game live with all of you instead of recorded with a bunch of people I hate.

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:09

barnold: Dec 16, 2011; what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot

I want Brissett and Edelman to get equal snaps.

Who's the next man in line if Edelman gets knocked out?

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:12

sean10mm: Jun 29, 2005; It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, MAD-2R World

Parmesan Basil posted:

Texans will win and will win easily. 28-9 is the final score. Belichick and Brady must be stopped before they poison the NFL any more than they already have. Ideally, both are excommunicated and tried for crimes against the sport!

Lucky for you that tired gimmicks don't get excommunicated from TFF!

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:13

barnold: Dec 16, 2011; what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot

Just read that Garoppolo is gonna put on the uniform as Brissett's backup. I think I would rather have Edelman throwing the ball than Grop with his janky shoulder, but that's just me

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:13

sean10mm: Jun 29, 2005; It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, MAD-2R World

Turdsdown Tom posted:

Just read that Garoppolo is gonna put on the uniform as Brissett's backup. I think I would rather have Edelman throwing the ball than Grop with his janky shoulder, but that's just me

Latest report now is that he won't.

:iiam:

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:14

barnold: Dec 16, 2011; what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot

Here's how it's gonna go down: Texans gonna jump out to an early lead, maybe 10 or 14 points. Pats gonna come down and get within 7, and by the 4th quarter everyone's gonna say "Is it time to count out Backup Brissett?" Then he's gonna run the 2-minute drill and send the game into OT, where Stephen Gostkowski is probably going to shank a field goal and lose the game

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:34

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Emergency QB shootout incoming.

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:37

hifi: Jul 25, 2012

sean10mm posted:

Latest report now is that he won't.

If you list a player as questionable or doubtful or maybe or whatever other than IN or OUT they should have a D20 range assigned to each status and they roll to see if you are in or out

# ? Sep 22, 2016 20:40

Badfinger: Dec 16, 2004; Timeouts?!

We'll take care of that.

FIRST TIME posted:

Emergency QB shootout incoming.

Closer to this IMO

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7DTNEa2E7w

# ? Sep 22, 2016 21:16

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Badfinger posted:

Closer to this IMO

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7DTNEa2E7w

I am firm in my belief of that being a very entertaining game. :colbert:

(I had a pint of vodka before heading down to the bar and drinking a pitcher to myself while watching that game :ssh:

)

# ? Sep 22, 2016 21:28

Edward Mass: Sep 14, 2011; 𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen𝅘𝅥𝅮

Turdsdown Tom posted:

I want Brissett and Edelman to get equal snaps.

Who's the next man in line if Edelman gets knocked out?

I have a feeling the Bulls on Parade will help us find out.

# ? Sep 22, 2016 21:29

cheesetriangles: Jan 5, 2011

I think it's possible for the patriots to win maybe. Maybe even likely?

# ? Sep 22, 2016 22:12

barnold: Dec 16, 2011; what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot

Just warning you all in advance that if the Patriots win, I am going to be laughing my rear end off in and around this thread.

And also I should get my name changed for free to something commemorative of Brissett

# ? Sep 22, 2016 22:14

CyberPingu: Sep 15, 2013; If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

If Brisset throws the winning TD can we get that Pats radio commentator to shout, WHERES THE BRISKET

# ? Sep 22, 2016 22:20

Badfinger: Dec 16, 2004; Timeouts?!

We'll take care of that.

Turdsdown Tom posted:

Just warning you all in advance that if the Patriots win, I am going to be laughing my rear end off in and around this thread.

And also I should get my name changed for free to something commemorative of Brissett

The Patriots would be favorites even without anyone they could pretend to call a quarterback on their roster. I don't know why winning a home game where you're favored is a cause for hysterics.

# ? Sep 22, 2016 22:29

Athanatos: Jun 7, 2006; Est. 1967

cheesetriangles posted:

I think it's possible for the patriots to win maybe. Maybe even likely?

Never bet against Bill Belichick

# ? Sep 22, 2016 22:29

Ehud: Sep 19, 2003; football.

can't wait for another dumb team to hand the pats a victory

# ? Sep 22, 2016 22:44

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

Ehud posted:

can't wait for another dumb team to hand the pats a victory

# ? Sep 22, 2016 22:50

Edward Mass: Sep 14, 2011; 𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen𝅘𝅥𝅮

Hey, where's the Brandon Weeden, Colts-slayer option?

# ? Sep 22, 2016 23:24

Oberst: May 24, 2010; Fertilizing threads since 2010

Parmesan Basil posted:

Texans will win and will win easily. 28-9 is the final score. Belichick and Brady must be stopped before they poison the NFL any more than they already have. Ideally, both are excommunicated and tried for crimes against the sport!

Only a true ravens fan could hate the pats with such fervor

# ? Sep 22, 2016 23:57

Fate Accomplice: Nov 30, 2006

Dear the New England Patriots,
Please win this game and suffer zero injuries.

# ? Sep 22, 2016 23:57

Popy: Feb 19, 2008

Badfinger posted:

Closer to this IMO

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7DTNEa2E7w

i will never forget this game. It never ended.

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:01

Vertical Lime: Dec 11, 2004

https://twitter.com/AdamSchefter/status/779094052679495680

seriously, why bet against new england

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:05

Popy: Feb 19, 2008

Go pats..

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:12

Tom Sellout: May 27, 2011; $240 million of Johnny Walker Blue and Throatzilla's services.

Go tie

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:16

a new study bible!: Feb 2, 2009; BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly

Pats will win by 35

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:17

barnold: Dec 16, 2011; what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot

Badfinger posted:

I don't know why winning a home game where you're favored is a cause for hysterics.

because gently caress you we're #1

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:20

ComposerGuy: Jul 28, 2007; Conspicuous Absinthe

Only way we win this is off turnovers.

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:20

Parmesan Basil: Nov 12, 2008; TIME IS THE FIRE IN WHICH WE BURN THE GAME CLOCK

sean10mm posted:

Lucky for you that tired gimmicks don't get excommunicated from TFF!

Bill Belichick and Tom Brady should be arrested for fraud.

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:24

b0ng: Jan 16, 2004; Thats a nice Game 7 you have there. Would be a shame if somebody nailed it down.

How much does Wilfork weigh

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:40

Shimrra Jamaane: Aug 10, 2007; Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

If you are rooting against Brissett you're definitely racist.

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:44

Ghost Dog: Aug 17, 2016

the patriots are gonna stumble backwards into a win and its going to be very sad

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:45

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

If you are rooting against Brissett you're definitely racist.

You've caught me. gently caress the white gymrats that populate the Patriots and most of their scum fans too. JJ Watt is the only honkey on the field who I'm down with, and even then it's only because he's hitting P*tr**ts.

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:48

Fate Accomplice: Nov 30, 2006

I may be the only one but I really like the Patriots color rush uniforms.

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:49

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# ? May 7, 2024 16:37

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

Ghost Dog posted:

the patriots are gonna stumble backwards into a win and its going to be very sad

This is the truth.

Forever_Abed posted:

darkesttimeline

# ? Sep 23, 2016 00:50

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > TNF Week 3 - The worst 2-0 team in history faces off with the Patriots

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