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I still think about the jumanji coma bug warrior from time to time, great thread necro, keep it up
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Apr 7, 2024 06:15
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Bugworld is real. Search your feelings, you know it to be true.
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Apr 7, 2024 14:07
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Bugworld haunts my dreams (only figuratively, sadly)
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Apr 7, 2024 14:55
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wesleywillis posted:Thirty something virgin goon. Goes to therapy, possibly on the advice of this thread. Therapist takes a liking to him, he loses the v card with her, he posts about it here. At some point she sees his posts here or otherwise finds out about him being a goon and freaks the gently caress out. She decides he's no longer allowed to post here/she's super jealous, and possessive etc... therapy goon disappears from updating the thread. Presumed dead. Oh.......
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Apr 7, 2024 16:46
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Is the "cut your dick off" joke advice still OK or have we reached a tipping point where there's just too many Trans/NB/etc. Goons for it to still be funny?
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Apr 7, 2024 16:53
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I think either way its been run into the ground already by this point
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Apr 7, 2024 16:55
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Desert Bus posted:Is the "cut your dick off" joke advice still OK or have we reached a tipping point where there's just too many Trans/NB/etc. Goons for it to still be funny? The idea that it’s offensive only when enough trans people have arrived to witness the boring, casual bigotry is kind of funny.
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Apr 7, 2024 18:24
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The spirit of the advice is "quit making decisions with your genitals" isn't it? Also, re: that last confession, I can't help but wonder if they've ever tested the waters with play-wrestling. Obviously a long way from narrowly losing an actual fight without sustaining permanent injury irl, but it feels like there are a lot of normal ways to work elements of that fantasy into an existing sex life without freaking anybody out.
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Apr 7, 2024 18:55
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Dang It Bhabhi! posted:The idea that it’s offensive only when enough trans people have arrived to witness the boring, casual bigotry is kind of funny. Yeah I phrased that badly. Sometimes I words bad and not good.
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Apr 7, 2024 19:02
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Desert Bus posted:Yeah I phrased that badly. Sometimes I words bad and not good. Forums gone woke. But also if you don't cut your dick off it's because of toxic masculinity.
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Apr 7, 2024 19:05
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burial posted:The spirit of the advice is "quit making decisions with your genitals" isn't it? Yeah
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Apr 7, 2024 19:06
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Desert Bus posted:Yeah I phrased that badly. Sometimes I words bad and not good. All good. Especially now that I’ve chopped my dick off.
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Apr 7, 2024 19:13
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Dang It Bhabhi! posted:All good. Especially now that I’ve chopped my dick off. 
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Apr 7, 2024 19:34
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I'd just recommend finding a professional dick chopper rather than doing it yourself
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Apr 7, 2024 19:59
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burial posted:The spirit of the advice is "quit making decisions with your genitals" isn't it? OP should pick up a woman at a BJJ class because they can absolutely make him feel powerless without causing any permanent damage
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Apr 8, 2024 00:25
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D-Pad posted:OP should pick up a woman at a BJJ class because they can absolutely make him feel powerless without causing any permanent damage* *assuming OP is training their neck properly! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Rn8iDZOzTk
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Apr 8, 2024 00:27
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Oh wow, this thread. I won't say which confessions were mine but the advice I got here was extremely helpful and I'm doing alright now. Thanks goons.
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Apr 8, 2024 01:14
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The Bible posted:Oh wow, this thread. Glad your wound healed op
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Apr 8, 2024 01:45
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anon posted:Hey, I'm another goon who has radicalized himself on AI erotic roleplay (ERP). There must be others of us, or those who are interested? I use a program called faraday.dev and get character cards from a website chub.ai. There's some pretty weird poo poo on there, but you're either molesting a robot or being molested by a robot so is there an ethical issue? Anyway, happy gooning and I'm glad I'm not the only one. I didn't click on those links and so I am not sure you should either, but this is all the new day has for us so e: Nevermind. They don't show as links anyway!
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Apr 11, 2024 21:51
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burial posted:The spirit of the advice is "quit making decisions with your genitals" isn't it? I mean this has to be the least strange thing you could ask a sex worker to do, but op insists over and over again that it's not a fetish. Is it long term? Are they looking for some kind of hyper abusive and physically violent girlfriend experience situation?
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Apr 11, 2024 22:10
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I drink fetid hobo cum.
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Apr 11, 2024 23:26
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gently caress meant to post that anonymously.
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Apr 11, 2024 23:26
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It's ok we already knew
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Apr 11, 2024 23:41
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isn't that just what one of the AI lovers say
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Apr 12, 2024 05:09
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Maybe it's just byproduct of when everyone realized Disney's Robin Hood was the source of a lot of people's furry fetishes, but I have feeling that goon saw the lady lion pin Simba in the lion king and felt an awakening
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Apr 12, 2024 05:25
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Friend posted:Maybe it's just byproduct of when everyone realized Disney's Robin Hood was the source of a lot of people's furry fetishes, but I have feeling that goon saw the lady lion pin Simba in the lion king and felt an awakening There's weirdly sexual stuff in basically every Disney movie. It's almost like it's on purpose! Comparing which scene in which film warped your budding sexuality actually is a kinda fun way to feel out compatibility though. My wife and I have discussed this before and we high fived because our answers were the same.  She was a fesh-monger and that is no wonder, for so were her mother and father before: PLEASE ADVISE posted:Yet another 30-ish virgin goon here. So like, how does sex work, mechanically? I assume its more than just a bunch of thrusting? All I have to go off is porn, which I've been informed is not a great source. And definitely could use some pussy eating tips You were brave to come here.
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Apr 13, 2024 01:20
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burial posted:
Well?
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Apr 13, 2024 13:30
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Bet it was Dan Ackroyd getting that ghost blow job
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Apr 13, 2024 14:17
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Remember that bit near the end of-- HEY! You almost got me.
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Apr 13, 2024 14:20
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Labyrinth for me
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Apr 13, 2024 14:24
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Glad this thread is still alive and that I don't have to run it  burial posted:You were brave to come here. Serious answer: actual PIV intercourse is in fact mostly just thrusting (and/or grinding depending on position) with some side stuff sometimes, but you won't get that far in a given sexual encounter if you don't spend time doing other stuff first. Getting both parties relaxed and excited involves a lot of kissing and hand-based exploration. Do what feels good but be gentle with it, especially to start. Your partner will be open about what feels good and what doesn't, especially if you are open about your lack of experience (be open about this) and they're still game. If they're not open about this, ask them to be. It's natural to be nervous about this kind of thing but try your best not to be in your own head about it. Hope this helps!
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Apr 13, 2024 15:08
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Dear 30 yo goon. I have no idea what genitals you're working with, so here's a reply mainly about vulvas. Fwiw most people with vulvas have orgasms from clitoral stimulation, and solely vaginal stimulation doesn't lead to orgasm for them. Keep in mind that the clitoris is a organ larger than just the visible nub. It's got legs encased with bulbs, all of which are filled will nerves. Thrusting can stimulate the clitoral bulbs which are on either side of the vaginal opening. And grinding while fully inserted can stimulate the entire, nerve filled vulva. And on that note, some people like initial shallow thrusts or one big thrust when it comes to penetration. This does stimulate the clitoral bulbs. Though if you want to give your partner an orgasm, thrusting alone may not do the trick. You can manually stimulate the clitoris, or use toys. It depends on the person, really. Everyone's genitals is different. But you can never go wrong with a bullet vibe, imo. Absolutely ask your partner what they like. Je Joue mimi soft vibrator is a decent one, and Tango X by We Vibe is also a really good one with a decent, textured handle that's easier to grip with slippery hands. Also keep in minds that PIV [penis in vagina] is not the end all be all of sex. Oral, anal, mutual or solo masturbation, etc are all legit ways to have sex with partners. Try not to get stuck on the idea that you have to have insertion of any kind for it to be sex. Omgyes.com has videos on solo, partner, and intercourse that are realistic ways people have sex and self pleasure. It is paywall locked, but perhaps there's pirate-able poo poo if you really can't pay. Bettydodson.com also has videos iirc, and is run by the doctor herself who is a prominent figure in the human sexuality field of study. She's also written a lot of books about human sexuality and how to have fun, safe sex with partners or solo. For books, there's also 'Sex Yourself' by Carlyle Jansen. Yes it's aimed at afab people but it'll teach you how to touch vulvas in a way that'll get your partner off. It's very descriptive and has step by step instructions. Another good book is 'The Good in Bed Guide to Female Orgasms' by Emily Nagoski. ps if your partner squirts, go to the dollar store and buy transparent / opaque shower curtains to lay beneath some towels. No they're not sexy, but neither is paying a few thousand for a brand new mattress because the squirting fluids soaked through the towels AND bed sheets. Sure there's special waterproof, super soft blankets made specifically for this situation. But those are costly, and if you're a broke bitch, make do where you can. PPS if / when you start having sexual contact with other people, do get a STI test, and then get another one maybe 3? months later. I think HIV takes about six months, unless it's acute. Due to the incubation period of some STIs / diseases. Seriously, you are old enough to know better, and so does your partner(s). It's extremely easy to get one. Just call up your doctor and say you want a full workup done. There's literally no excuse not to know your status. Even free / low cost clinics will do STI testing for you.
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Apr 13, 2024 16:17
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I got some clitoral bulbs for u right here op
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Apr 13, 2024 16:22
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kntfkr posted:I got some clitoral bulbs for u right here op
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Apr 13, 2024 16:25
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I mean it's nice that people are responding earnestly to that goon but like there is information about how to have sex good on the internet
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Apr 13, 2024 16:29
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Sagebrush posted:I mean it's nice that people are responding earnestly to that goon but like There is a lot of information on how to do sex bad on the internet too tho
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Apr 13, 2024 16:31
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BlankSystemDaemon posted:those are light bulbs, ya silly goose Excitebulbs
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Apr 13, 2024 16:51
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Excitebulbs: She's about to have a bright idea.
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Apr 13, 2024 18:05
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Listen, if we don't teach goons to suck and gently caress something besides their computers, there's not going to be the next generation of goons to post here. And that's the real tragedy. Also burial posted:Excitebulbs: She's about to have a bright idea.
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Apr 14, 2024 00:21
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You can get a decent mattress for like $250 on Amazon these days. Let your lady squirt on the sheets, nerds.
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Apr 14, 2024 02:06
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