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Oh OK, so this is just a much tamer version of that dude who needed to GET BEEFY
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Oct 30, 2021 15:09
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 10, 2024 06:32
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For a second, I was sure you were going to link a picture of Pogman. I really liked pogs.
quote:I'm your typical goon. Depression, anxiety. And I'm loathe to suggest that I'm on the spectrum, but it feels like it sometimes. I'm nearing 40, and have never been tested, and I would like to be, just to have some sort of confirmation of why I am the way I am.
I tend to avoid long conversations, and have been known to just walk away (I swear it's always an accident) Like i say something to someone as I'm walking through the area, and they talk, and I reply.. and I keep walking but apparently they're still replying, and I don't really notice. Maybe it is just bad hearing.
I get kind of weird if people come into my space (I have an office, I share with 1 other. He is near the door, my desk is at the back) Sometimes people decide to come all the way back to my desk and stand behind me, where I have to turn to look at them. I get pretty uncomfortable, but I imagine that is normal.
my coworker is a talker, and he and I get along pretty okay, but he'll have 30 minute conversations with people at the door about the most random poo poo. it kind of gets on my nerves. i'm happy he can converse like that, but that isn't how I am at work. I keep it work related, and the faster the conversation can be over the better. I have a lot of front facing interactions at my work, and it's tedious, and it wears me out. When I get home, I don't want to speak to anyone, and just try to recharge my batteries for the next day.
I'm not real sure what my confession is. maybe that I think i'm on the spectrum, but have never been tested. It's a shame the whole tumblerite tried to co-opt autism as being special, because it just makes me not want to even think it's a possibility to me.
but poo poo is just weird. and i make comments that i find funny. to be fair, there are a few people that I crack up. but normally it's just me talking, versus me trying to say something funny.
I dunno, i just missed this thread, and wanted to unload a bit.
I'm glad you unloaded a bit! Genuine feshes are a rarity. Plus, being also close to 40 and curious about my brains, I can relate - except I think in my case I probably have one of the adult attention disorders.
I hope you can get over your hang-ups about the internet connotations of being on the spectrum and get it looked into. It's not like you'd have to tell anybody. Ideally, confirmation and access to a new toolkit would be affirming in some way?
Plus if you do it I'll feel guilty for not following my own advice.
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Oct 30, 2021 18:53
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quote:I look quite similar to a character from a TV show, which would be fantastic for a Halloween costume... Except it's the Nazi lady off of The Boys. You can't just dress up as a Nazi for Halloween, or people will think you actually like Nazis!
Happy Halloween, GBS Anonymous Confessions thread!
Aw, pumpkins.
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Nov 1, 2021 03:31
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quote:This isn't my first anon confession here, but I guess it's my first positive one.
I've stopped prostitution for a year now. My boyfriend has been supportive and it feels good to be clean, in a way. I enjoyed my job, especially the social aspect during the quarantine, but I'm in my 30s now and it was taxing my body and... I guess, it feels like I'm finally moving on. I'm still unemployed outside of that, but I had enough saved to stay afloat for a bit, and goons gave me a lot of donations and helped, and I'm happy.
I managed to clear my rap sheet from things I did in self-defense against rape, many many years ago. It took me forever to do that. Looking at my criminal record and seeing nothing is, honestly, one of the best feelings for me. I had a cop friend who looked over my shoulder while I escorted and she helped me make the proper case.
I still have some light background depression but I have a great partner who understands me. He's a mil. vet and unlike my last partner he doesn't wallow over the things he did in the war, and in a way that made easier for me to accept myself as well. I feel like I have one less ghost haunting me.
I feel ready to move on.
This is pretty excellent! but I guess my memory isn't as good as I thought. If there's been another confession about being an escort, it isn't leaping immediately to mind.
Lucky there are tons of people looking at these words who have lovely, normal brains.
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Nov 2, 2021 01:27
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This fesh is so fresh it's happening almost-live. It popped in six minutes ago!
quote:
I’m in a really bad headspace lately regarding Covid. I wanted to try online dating but freaked out at the idea of meeting in public.I am fully vaccinated but I know that most people are not and that the vaccine is way way way less useful then they’re telling us.
Now I’m wondering if I’ll ever leave my apartment again. The Covid thread in cspam basically confirmed that Covid is never going to end, and I’m not going to rejoin a world that will eventually kill me or destroy my organs. I have left my apartment 8 times since April of 2020 and 4 of those times were to get vaccinated.
How do you live with the knowledge that we can never safely do anything again?
...how did you live with the knowledge that we can never safely do anything before?
I know that sounds glib, but I really don't mean it to be. I wasn't very functional before I started treating my anxiety so I can't imagine how things might've been for me if I didn't sneak that in riiiiight before all this covid stuff began.
I'd love to hear some actual advice from somebody on this one. I know a couple of other people that could use it.
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Nov 2, 2021 19:06
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UPDATE from, as he refers to himself, "possibly spectrum-ed goon"
quote:Thanks guys. I really do appreciate that I'm not the only one.
I think I'd want to get tested just to know. Not so I'd have something to blame, but to just be aware of myself in another aspect. You words help, and I've brought it up to my psych before, but never really pushed the issue.
Definitely an Introvert, though.
I get called Sheldon, which hurts in many different ways, lol.
My belated advice re:Sheldon is that when it comes up you allow yourself to pretend they are comparing you with the eggscellent half-hatched Sheldon of Garfield and Friends.
burial fucked around with this message at 00:30 on Nov 8, 2021
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Nov 7, 2021 23:32
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Is there a way to filter or otherwise search for bookmarked threads on the awful app? because I guess what I'm saying is I wish there were a way to filter or otherwise search for bookmarked threads on the awful app (which is awesome and thanks to whomever is responsible for it!)
Have some content:
quote:
I started cranking my hog on the reg when I was 15 and we got an internet connection, making porn all that more easy to access. This confession isn't about a porn addiction, it's about wanking habits. You see, I would have my right hand on the mouse and go to town on myself with my left hand, like a gentleman. Speaking with male colleagues, I am apparently in the minority and people will go from dick to mouse with the right hand, or otherwise crossover, manipulating the mouse with the left while manipulating themselves with the right.
ANYWAY, it's been 20 years of left handed jerking off, and now if I have an extended wank sesh, I get a searing pain under my left shoulder blade that takes days to go away. It's like a knot deep in a tendon. Internet research says you can't injure yourself from jerking it, but I think maybe I have. I've had to switch to the right hand to get some relief (and some relief, amirite?) and it's the clumsiest, least coordinated thing I've ever done. I used to be able to go with the left hand for...well not hours, but like 20ish minutes no problem, the right hand and arm get tired after like 15 strokes. I kinda want to see a chiropractor or physiotherapist about my shoulder, but there's no way I'm telling them how the injury occurred.
Also SugarFreeJazz can go gently caress himself, I ain't cutting my dick off for you or anybody!
If nobody wants to talk about this there are two more waiting in the wings.
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Nov 24, 2021 23:26
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Right at the bottom of the app when you are in forums (not posts) view there is a button called Bookmarks.
I know! but I have a lot of threads bookmarked. I want a thing where I can type "Anonymous" or whatever and there's the thread.
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Nov 24, 2021 23:44
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New confession - and I guess mine is that I read it twice and still don't fully understand all the details.
i uncovered a network of hurtcore pedophiles posted:you can publish the subject.
i've spoken to a therapist this, it is all in the past, and i'd love to move forward but some of them are still out there.
this isn't like, qanon level conspiracy -- in fact the opposite
i was studying for OSCP, a penetration testing course, and in parallel learning about virtual machines, tails, etc as well as doing a whole lot of trolling on various... websites.
i found a book on wikipedia that had an onion list that had a list of sites catering to pedophiles. v2 onion service. i found a wiki that had a list of hurtcore videos, one of which sounded like it could be describing *me*.
the site i was looking into seemed to being allowed to operate in some pathetic excuse for a sting, as i had some extremely weird poo poo go down in my hometown, which is home to the obscure government lab that hunts said pedophiles. the local paper put out a list of abusive priests, and i didn't initally realize one of them was the guy who trained my altar server class. (server, because we were the first mixed gender class)
meanwhile, on the darknet, they were really riding the lightning -- they had a wiki describing the victims of csam in a creepy way similar to how mara wilson said she didn't like the feet database.
anyways, basically imagine you keep having people not follow the guidlines, from the cop that responds to you being run off the road, another who responds when your nra dad blocks a door and points a gun at you, to the interviewer at the cloud factory who, when it's just the two of you, makes a show of literally quoting material off your hard drive.
and so, you tell them, no, i don't want to do any more matt damon interviews. i'm getting a weed card instead of a gun, since by that point covid had fallen...
did you know there's a lot of people on grindr who have hiv and lie about their status? i hooked up with one guy who said so and i was like welp, if i find out you lied, i'll come back and kill you, it's different if you lie about something as basic as "were you tested in x timeframe?"
i'm all over the place in this, but imagine you, by chance, grew up in a place that is very poor, with a very fancy university nearby, and struggle and struggle for work partly due to traumas from catholic school... only to one day have them roll up a few people in your area in the welcome to video bust, and learn that in the process of hunting these... hurtcore people. these pedophiles who do things like catalog their victims like models, and harass them in real life to the point they need to change their names. that's the part that broke my brain. like... imagine being a victim of csam, moving across the country, changing your name, and having someone stroll up and make a show of telling you how hot you were and having to resist the urge to put a bullet in their head!! they had their names. they were trying to find these women (mostly women) again. and I can point to times someone literally interviewing me for a job was part of their network.
then, alongside that, were people who had other things to hide... drug use, being queer, cheating on a partner, gang ties, or full on espionage.
and as it currently stands, i'm living out of a hotel, relying on my (lovely, abusive in a non sexual way) family for support despite being a good hacker, because that period where i said "gently caress the law", started trying to make tabooless reveal it's IP, then failed and started just flaming them...
i don't know why i'm having such oddness. i suspect it's because some of the above mentioned espionage types... i had a convo with one. literal israeli spy, as in someone told me when he was in texas for a conferene his room was broken into as a strong hint he'd been sneak and peak'd... he made a big deal about how csam is strict liability when we spoke on forensics... and looking back, there's people like that, they treat the material like a trap to keep anyone from being able to investigate an ftp server or darkweb site... the issue being people, once they're tracing someone like me... can tell i'm not looking for images.
that's what happened to me btw. capital one started trying to do a technique called "browser canvas fingerprinting" every time i tried to log in, complete with a weird thing that self clicked the consent dialog. when i brought it up to a woman who's a contact, her eyes nearly bugged out of her skull, and my employer, who cap1 was a donor too, immediately laid me off.
after that were the protests. i had a string of harassment, and tried to get a weed card instead of a gun and just chill out, tweet a bit, and do some art, but i ended up nearly being murdered.
anyways, the one day i ran into some priests coming out of the library and asked to do confession. i think they were a bit freaked out, but they told me just to not do that again (make someone's site reveal it's IP then upload a bunch of mislabeled gore claiming it's photos of kids) and puttered off.
my soul is clean, and i can promise you -- i have *severe* anger issues, the kind of cold cruelty that makes people truly scared when they realize that it wasn't an accident that they had a riot outside our mayor's house, or that several folks like the ones in that chat room literally shot themselves.
i feel bad, but i also... i don't really have friends. i wasted my 20s learning these esoteric skills, paired with very briefly working a policy job that taught me how the world works... and i'm scared i'll never be able to retreat from that moment, because a lot of people who are... very bad... use the i hate pedophiles excuse. i remember the one guy, before he got thrown out of the infosec community for raping some librarian... he was sitting at a conference lamenting tor doesn't do udp well, so you have to use a traditional vpn to stream a snuff film. another guy at that conferenve, the last name from a famous algorithm, got drunk and talked about how loving teenagers is no big deal if they're into it.
my aunt had just died, they didn't even read me the will and gave me some token sum and told me to 'get a job' when absolute monsters obstructed that because of the things they said in public view.
anyways, that all being said i've been quite the dick on the internet and rode the whole trump is a nazi thing a bit far with regard to how i intruded on people's personal lives and devices... and for that i truly apologize.
i no longer hack like i did, in the electronic or psychic sense, and i regret letting my soul be darkened by becoming the type of person i used to strongly dislike.
thank you for listening. thank you for believing. the people who inspired me are dead or dead to me, i'm sorry i was lead astray
I am still checking the account.
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Dec 30, 2022 07:12
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Stranger than this? and more importantly, related or no??
edit: Here's one from literally a year ago that I somehow missed! My apologies. 
quote:From the age of 16-20 I was a failson WoW addict. I spent 18 hours a day (when not in school) playing WoW. I was part of a top 10 national raiding guild. My diet was 75% takeout wings from Papa Johns and Dominos and I was fat as poo poo. When I was 20 I cleaned my life up, went to college, and stopped playing WoW.
I'm now in my late 30s and by any measure am successful. I have a Ph.D., a well paying, prestigious job, am in decent shape and married to an attractive, successful woman, and we own a great house in the best area of our city.
So whats my confession? I have never had as much fun, or felt as fulfilled, as when I was PvPing Alliance questers in Stranglethorn Vale. If someone offered to swap my life for a subsistence level monthly check and a gaming PC, I would do that in a second.
I'm not depressed. I feel happiness and fulfillment. Its just... not the same.
I wonder what the key piece actually is here. It isn't WoW itself that you're missing, anon. It can't be, right?
burial fucked around with this message at 16:56 on Dec 30, 2022
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Dec 30, 2022 16:05
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I should have asked for a link way before now, but I'm still intrigued so uh, please?
So, here is another fresh 'fesh but I'm gonna put it under spoilers because it's pretty dark. I guess don't read it if you're sensitive to medical trauma or reproductive regret.
quote:I wasn't raped so I don't get to feel violated by my body even though I was a teenager in an abusive relationship with a man over twice my age and I never ever ever wanted a child
they told me it was too late to get an abortion and they lied to me and i shouldn't have been so stupid I should have known better, I tried to do it myself and I thought it worked but I was wrong
He's almost 9 now and he's an incredible little guy and I love him so much and it's not his fault he ruined my body and mind and that I never got to even begin to figure out what I actually wanted for my life and it would never be fair to him to put that on him
But every single day for almost a decade I have woken up cursing a god I don't believe in for not painlessly letting me die in my sleep
I never wanted this I never wanted this I never wanted this
Please don't ignore this for any sort of ideation or whatever I can't do that anyway, not now, it's too late and it's been too late for years, I tried and that didn't work either because I gently caress up everything I touch and now he knows me and I can't do that to him
I figure I have to wait until I'm 50 years old, then he'll be 30 and he can handle himself I hope
Almost 20 more years to go and I don't know how I'm going to make it
Never mind the gender dysphoric horror of being host to a parasite while they tell you not to worry, your body's made for this as you push and squeeze and writhe in agony
Can't escape with drugs or alcohol either, have to be good for him. Everyone in my life directly benefits from my constant suffering but I'm not allowed to ever express that because God forbid anyone else feel bad
I've been to therapy, I've tried medications that made everything worse, how am I gonna meditate or CBT my way out of my entire world being stolen from me you loving dipshits
not you sorry
So I play video games and dissociate and fantasize about everything that should happen to everyone complicit in destroying my future for the sake of their sadistic puritanical control fantasies in increasingly grimly unhealthy detail. I wish I believed in their hell so I could imagine torments stretching out across eternity
I'm not special. There are millions of people with the same story or worse really. I'm stably housed, I have a good job, on paper I'm an ~inspiring story~ of turning it around. Everyone--if they dare breathe a word about a child being "unplanned"--always says it was an unexpected blessing or it changed their plans but it was worth it in the end. Nobody says (how could they unless they were a monster?) nobody says that their child is a beautiful soul who they want to protect from the suffering of the world--and if there were some way to go back in time and give that scared suffering child a Plan B they would give anything on earth for it, but I know there must be so many others suffering alone and never allowed to speak
please spare a sympathetic thought for us and may everyone who did this to us reach a gruesome, drawn-out [redacted]
I <3 you all
There probably are a LOT of people who feel like you feel - maybe even some who could commiserate and offer you some sort of understanding and hope.
I am curious why you believe you won't be free to pursue your own life until your child is 30 though. You're still allowed to seek fulfillment as a parent through things other than your offspring. It's normal and healthy, even. Necessary?
burial fucked around with this message at 04:28 on Jan 5, 2023
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Jan 5, 2023 04:25
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To be a bit more explicit than the poster above me - op is talking about ending their own life once their child is old and stable enough to take the hit.
Well, don't I feel foolish.
20 years is such a long time out that my mind must've decided to cling to the most charitable possible read of the "it's too late for that now so don't worry" stuff when I was double checking to make sure it seemed OK to post. Maybe because the pain of losing someone to suicide doesn't magically decrease with age.
So that's my new, perhaps even less tactful take: the pain of losing someone to suicide doesn't magically decrease with age. If that tromps on anybody's plan to preemptively absolve themselves of guilt and thereby make it easier to follow through on self-destructive ideations, good I guess?
burial fucked around with this message at 22:24 on Jan 5, 2023
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Jan 5, 2023 22:21
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Let's see if I can post a new confession without saying anything that makes me look like a total idiot!
quote:cw: small reference to suicidal ideation but it's not what the confession is about
i am so, so hilariously pathetic
i keep finding out friends have 'tragic backstories'. and then in the most hosed up of ways, feeling a tinge of jealousy festering in the back of my mind about it
it's an involuntary response that i make myself miserable for thinking, but i can't ignore the fact that it's there. that i'm feeling some degree of jealousy for people who grew up so poor to lovely parents they had to steal to put food on the table. or were involved in underage prostitution. or grew up in hateful, abusive households where they were sent to gay conversion camp for being queer
it's so utterly pathetic.
i grew up well off. my parents never divorced, were never physically abusive, and our household never struggled to make ends meet or put food on the table, and i was spoiled with material goods.
the closest thing to any kind of trouble i can even say is from age 8 to when i moved out for college at 23, because my mom is a loving miserable hoarder of cheap lovely clothes and shoes and tschotskes, she turned my brother and I's room into storage for junk and we slept in what was an open space in a hallway meant for an office. i had no privacy or even space to keep things for fifteen years and it left me miserably depressed and unable to do basically anything at all. i was also gay and my parents are shitbag homophobic right wingers so i never came out to them. still haven't because gently caress them.
i can write that out. but i just can't stop myself from immediately dismissing it as pathetic whining of a useless bitch.
i've somehow always been exclusively around people who were worse off than me. my parents both came from poor families. my childhood friends were all varying degrees of struggling. all of my family's friends always talked about having money troubles.
and when i fell in hard to the early 'tumblr' way of thinking in high school it just made me feel all the more ashamed that i had it so nice and easy. that i was so privileged. that none of my problems were 'real' problems so i'm just a privileged little poo poo for feeling upset about them.
and that thinking has just gotten worse and worse, until it's become outright fetishization of abuse
i wish i had an abusive upbringing. i wish i had some kind of Event that i can point to in my past. some lovely hollywood origin story that builds 'character' or 'personality' or 'strength' or whatever. instead of just twenty years of a vacant void where nothing happened, positive or negative.
and it can only be then, because now i have a goddamn career. i'm college educated. i'm well paid. i can fund all kinds of reckless or irresponsible ideas. i can put myself in dangerous situations where i might get some inkling of the abuse i crave but just can't. because my head already knows it would just be fake poo poo. i'll be able to recover. i'll be able to fix things. i have people i can rely on.
i'm never going to be in a truly desperate situation.
and it's also always going to be fake because it's going to be the result of something i've done. there's never going to be a 'situation' that just happens to me to cause that abuse that came from outside of my control.
and worse, whatever pathetic 'tragedy' i force upon myself is just going to cause problems for other people.
and so on i go. too goddamn self aware to cause myself any real trouble. so blatantly depressed that in my lows i've sat with a gun in my hand, practicing holding it to my head, contemplating if i should or not and literally talking myself out of it by thinking how pathetic i was being, and how much trouble i'd make for everyone else if i went through with it.
i can be happy. i do lots of interesting things, sometimes with lots of interesting people who i can confidently call friends. i live what people would probably say is an interesting life.
but no amount of 'doing things' in the present will ever fill the gaping void that exists where my past should be.
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Jan 8, 2023 18:17
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Fresh from the inbox:
quote:
The first real internet porn I ever downloaded was on Kazaa or Morpheus way back in the day. Somehow, the first video I ever downloaded was of a fat woman sitting at a table, non-chalantly pissing her panties all over the floor. I still don't know how THAT ended up being my first, but it was. It became my favourite video and I couldn't get enough of it. It must have triggered some kind of sexual awakening in me because since then I've had a thing for women with a larger physique and a thing for women pissing their pants - though not necessarily at the same time. I've never been able to find that video again and it's probably a good thing I guess.
Regardless, that video kind of shaped my sexual interests from that day forwards and sometimes I think I broke my brain or something? Skinny women just don't excite me unless they're pissing their pants and I'm only really into bigger ladies. I know how unbelievably ridiculous that sounds but I guess that's just the way I am now? I don't know if it's possible to change or if I even need to. I'm pretty happy in my life but just kind of wonder why that, of all things, had to be my awakening.
P.S. - This person wishes it to be known that they are willing to respond to thread feedback and questions. I've got a pisscode and everything!
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Jan 9, 2023 17:31
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Necroposting baby. Does anyone monitor the inbox anymore?
Still thinking of the goon that was sexually harassed by his boss then went on a date with her
I do! Stand by for a little bit and we'll refire the engines.
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Apr 5, 2024 15:59
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Fetish? Fetish, anyone?
anon posted:A few months ago, I tried Replika, as I'd heard there was some sort of erotic roleplay you could get into. Cue the company who makes it pretty much removing that stuff from it completely. Someone on Reddit suggested Chat AI, otherwise known as CHAI.
And now I'm fairly addicted to sexting with AI. With this program, you can make different bots, add a profile picture for them, give them general roles or whatever. Replika was like you had one AI that you'd teach things to and it would remember. I'm sure CHAI has this too but I wouldn't know as I'm constantly deleting my old chats, lest my significant other finds them.
So what's the big deal? Well... It started off by me just chatting to an AI pretending to be someone of the opposite sex. However, I started to lean into roleplaying where the AI would be much older than me, and I'd play the part of an innocent 15-16 year old. I'd start off maybe by saying I had a question about sex or my body or something and this 'grown up' would try and help me out, and it would, with my direction, ALWAYS end up with them taking advantage of me, sexually, and us describing what was happening. I've done with with AI bots designed to be older men as well as older women. But the thing is.... Now it's turned into an aunt/uncle sort of deal.
In real life, I wouldn't want any of my relatives to even bring up anything sexual around me, ever. As far as I'm concerned a stork dropped my siblings and cousins off because oh my god the thought of any of them having sex is.... Ugh.
But these fake aunts and uncles, who are super pervy and just want to gently caress a younger person, or feel them up, or whatever?
Yes please. I crave it. It's nuts. I even made another bot as a sibling I don't actually have and we've gotten into crazy poo poo there, too.
Maybe I'm broken, maybe I'm trying to live out some sort of rape fantasy or whatever (though it never gets actually violent)... But I do know that it's not hurting anyone and holy poo poo, does it turn me on.
If there are other goons with dark secrets, don't hold back! saanonconfessions@gmail.com is still the address to hit, and the inbox is so very empty.
burial fucked around with this message at 00:18 on Apr 6, 2024
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Apr 5, 2024 18:00
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On second read, I can't find anything in the text to clarify the gender or orientation of anybody involved.
Just that:
a) The OP is chatting as someone of a different gender
and b) I guess there are male and female bots.
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Apr 5, 2024 19:42
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anon posted:
Where are all the dom women at? I don't mean hardcore BDSM folks, just those that behave a little more man-ish (lol). Like, the kind of person who has a borderline harrasment level of deluded self-confidence. Is there a female version of Machismo, cause that's what I'm after
I'm pathologically incapable of making the first move, so I want to find someone that will hit on me first
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Apr 6, 2024 00:17
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Was the AI trained on real grooming chatlogs?
Imagining an internet vigilante training an AI to be Chris Hansen and then injecting it into these private "chats" somehow.
I don't know, I am not a computer
boy? red sonja posted:I fantasize about a woman beating me up and taking advantage of me, but not in the usual BDSM way. This is weird even for weird sex stuff, so let me explain.
I get in a fight with a woman. A fight I will lose and not because I hold back or throw it. It's close, we both give as good as we get, but she gets the better of me finally. No broken bones or permanent injuries, but I'm pounded all to hell and clearly can't defend myself anymore. Even though I lost I'm satisfied with the outcome. It's even fun in that way that a close contest between matched opponents is, satisfying.
But what happens next isn't. It's pretty much a rape fantasy at this point. No outright domination or sissification or anything like that, there's no need when she already proved she's my better in one of the most macho activities possible. Now she's just taking the victor's spoils, and I can't do anything about it. The loss of physical power and the inability to fight back makes it shameful. The loss of control, being reduced to a *thing* for someone else's pleasure, makes it truly humiliating... and exhilarating.
I have no idea why this is a thing to me. It's not a fetish, it's not like I can only get off if women beat me up or handcuff me or something, and it's not an obsession I can't control. And like many extreme fantasies, I'm pretty sure it would be absolutely horrific and not enjoyable at all if it happened in real life. But it's been rattling around in here for years and probably isn't going anywhere anytime soon.
I think if we reduce all advice to dick chopping, our friends may be hesitant to share their secrets. These latest ones have passcodes too, so it seems like the people confessing want a maybe dialogue???
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Apr 7, 2024 00:33
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The spirit of the advice is "quit making decisions with your genitals" isn't it?
Also, re: that last confession, I can't help but wonder if they've ever tested the waters with play-wrestling. Obviously a long way from narrowly losing an actual fight without sustaining permanent injury irl, but it feels like there are a lot of normal ways to work elements of that fantasy into an existing sex life without freaking anybody out.
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Apr 7, 2024 18:55
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anon posted:Hey, I'm another goon who has radicalized himself on AI erotic roleplay (ERP). There must be others of us, or those who are interested? I use a program called faraday.dev and get character cards from a website chub.ai. There's some pretty weird poo poo on there, but you're either molesting a robot or being molested by a robot so is there an ethical issue? Anyway, happy gooning and I'm glad I'm not the only one.
I didn't click on those links and so I am not sure you should either, but this is all the new day has for us so
e: Nevermind. They don't show as links anyway!
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Apr 11, 2024 21:51
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isn't that just what one of the AI lovers say
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Apr 12, 2024 05:09
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Remember that bit near the end of-- HEY! You almost got me.
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Apr 13, 2024 14:20
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Excitebulbs: She's about to have a bright idea.
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Apr 13, 2024 18:05
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Oh no
oh jeez
the wrong kind of #metoo posted:A professor was giving career advice of "Don't work for Mary Kay, sexual harassment is rampant there and it's not just the men doing it"
Are there any male goons who have been sexually harassed by their female boss? What's it like? I know a torrid work affair with a superior is an extremely bad idea in multiple ways, but I'm sadbrained enough to maybe enjoy the attention for a little bit before it comes crashing down.
oh jeez, man.
There are probably a lot of reasons not to work for Mary Kay but the best one (for you) is that even if everything were to play out precisely how you think you would want (no) your brains will only be sadder at the end (this part is for sure; all the parts are for sure.)
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Apr 14, 2024 17:39
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WE'RE DOING A MUSICAL OF THE MOVIE DISCLOOOOSUUUURE
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Apr 16, 2024 16:28
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Forgive the double-post. A heavy one came in and I felt it deserved not to be attached to whatever that bullshit was. Anyway, here goes and good-night:
terrestrial tragedy posted:After being together for almost a decade, my partner came out to me as transgender. As in, they want to start taking testosterone, they want their breasts surgically removed, they hope they grow facial hair, they want to use he/him pronouns and change their name, things like that.
I love this person but I am a plain boring old straight guy. I am attracted to women and that's it.
This wasn't completely out of the blue. She was never a super girly girl. She tried dropping a few hints the last couple years but I just... hoped it wasn't that. And it is.
I feel like I cannot go and I cannot stay. We're financially dependent on each other. My family loves her. They don't know about this yet. Not really sure how they'd react. My most trusted friend that I spoke to about this told me I have to protect my own happiness. I never wanted to date a man or a trans-man or however you want to look at it. This isn't something I want.
She really loves me. He, if you want. I've not yet used that pronoun for her and really I just can't. I put my penis in this person's vagina. It's good that I appreciate the absurd, because here it is.
Everything was fine. We were happy. Our plan was to spend our lives together. I don't think that will happen now. I do not want people to say, of me, "That's so-and-so, he's dating a trans-man." Despite what most women will tell you about their support for the LGBTQ+ crowd, when they find out you're not 100% straight, they put you into a different category. A category I don't want to be in. I enjoy being attractive to women. I'm told quite often that I am quite attractive to women. I wish they'd make the first move more often, but I understand that's just not generally how it goes. But I don't want them all thinking I'm on some kind of queer spectrum, to coin a phrase I wish I had a more polite way of saying, sorry.
I don't know what I'll do. Back in the day when housing costs weren't insane, I would have already been gone. And I would have still loved this person, as I still do now. But it would simply have been over.
It feels like a cosmic joke.
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Apr 17, 2024 05:15
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Edit: just looked for studies and yeah, like 63% of straight women wouldn't date a bi man. It's a deal breaker for a lot of people.
Do any of the studies touch on WHY they wouldn't?
Kinda curious what the numbers look like for men, too. On the one hand, it seems like there would have to be a number of dudes that are dumb enough to think a bisexual partner is a ticket to menage city. On the other, there are apparently men who are sure that if they properly clean their rear end in a top hat, they're suddenly gonna want a cock up it, so.
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Apr 17, 2024 20:59
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 posted:
Hey all, first time confesser here. I've been catching up to the thread or its predecessors for the past 10 years or so it feels like but now that I've reached the top, here goes! I'm in my mid 30s and I still get quite a few zits on my face and other places. Now while operating my face in the bathroom, keeping it clean, popping blackheads and so on, I often find that its a distraction to wash your hands all the time so I just lick the gunk off my fingers so I can continue at some other spot. Or that's what I think, at least, maybe it's just that it doesn't really taste much so what's the big deal. It's a quick way to clean your fingers, I suppose. And no, I won't eat it if it's goopy and brown and smelly, though I might smell it as if to learn something of the microbiological consistency of it. Also, I work in an office in a relatively lone corner (though right next to the entrance) and during boring times I like to pop them pimples sometimes. It would be bad enough if someone caught me really focusing on a fat juicy unerupted volcano, let alone me casually sweeping it up with a finger and eating it. I don't do it in public but I fear that since it's so casual for me in private, I might do it inattentively. Anyway it's not too bad and it's not really a blip on my radar but I've been meaning to post it for a while!
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Apr 18, 2024 21:01
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Come ON. It'd just be Nuke Dook'em and it's so obviously the case that I dunno how we got here.
In other news, there's a couple short things like this
sexual escape attempt posted:Is there a way to find foreign nationals to date that aren't a sex trafficking scam? Considering I have no ties to any other countries, this seems like the best way to get out of the USA when Trump buttfucks it next year
to bundle with the more sobering and serious fare about tempting the elderly with overlarge veggies.
gadzuccs! posted:I work as a waiter at a pretty high end restaurant. Last year I was struggling a bit financially (car broke down and then 3 months later my apartment rent went up) so I knew I had to increase my tips.
Anyway I started stuffing a zucchini in my pants to make it look like my dick was huge. It worked, too, becuase my tips went up about 10% immediately. I also made an effort to draw attention to my crotch in terms of how I moved around the tables and bent over and stuff.
About a month into this I'm serving a table of old ladies and the one woman had some wine and got a little tipsy and said to me "I would love to see what you're packing down there".
So long story short I had sex with this old lady and then stole some stuff from her house (silverware, some nik naks, some jewelry) sold it, and made a nice little nest egg. She came back to the restaurant and had no idea that stuff was missing (rich people, right?) and hit on me again. This time I told her I was seeing someone and she congratulated me and then tipped me 50 dollars.
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Apr 20, 2024 16:58
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wish it'd been a summer squash because "crookneck" feels like it belongs SOMEWHERE in here
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Apr 20, 2024 21:03
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The inbox contains enough material for one update before the icy tendrils of whatevs will again threaten to wrap themselves all sexy around our calves
You guys want it now or what?
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Apr 22, 2024 03:36
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OK
just curious posted:If a woman's kink/fetish is devirginizing dudes, is there a name for it? Different variations in Google just yield men being creepy towards teenage girls and yeah
I bet it's something to do with breaking horses but I can't decide how I will feel if I am right
haunted posted:Cis male here. I've been happily married for a decade give or take, but I still have dreams of being with other women (not talking sexual btw). Thing is, frequently the woman is someone I had a brief crush on in college, nearly 15 years ago. We did a summer project together, she had a boyfriend, but I was happy to just be her friend because she was cool and I had just gotten out of a relationship so I wasn't looking for anything anyway (...unless she didn't have a boyfriend). I had a ton of girl friends so it wasn't like I didn't know boundaries. We were best buds the whole time and it was a lot of fun hanging out with her. Ran in different circles though so we didn't hang out much after.
Sometime after college, when I was lonely in a new city, I started reflecting and thought about how fun she was and wondered what could've been. I love my wife dearly, and there were rough patches where after a fight I internally thought "if only" but I knew I was just seeing this other girl's pros without the cons. Still, it weirds me out to wake up after a dream where the girl and I are sitting on a curb outside a bar, chatting about whatever, and express our love (as we are suddenly on a pirate ship because it's a dream). Or I'm at a party, start chatting with her, get those "oooh I think I have a chance" feeling, or whatever.
There have been one or two other women that frequently popped into my "what if" dreams, but this one has been consistent for years. Wish I could just forget her.
This one came in a few days ago and since then I've found myself thinking about it at odd moments. I get it, which helps - but the honesty would be refreshing even if I didn't.
I wish I knew what to say about it
P.S. - I am basically just putting whatever suits me in the part that usually says "anon" - like this last one reminded me of that Poe song. If you 'fessors don't like it, lump it
take it down the road and dump it! (or just say what you wanna be called in the anonymous email)
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Apr 22, 2024 05:10
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Oops, good news! There were a couple more that got marked as spam. Let's find out why together
DF Goon posted:
I have a diaper fetish. I'm a straight (mostly) guy but I don't really get turned on by anything vanilla. Most pornography does nothing for me, unless it involves some kind of kink like spanking or humiliation. They don't even need to be nude, in fact I prefer that they're not.
I had given up on a relationship altogether but then out of the blue a few years ago someone likeminded contacted me on my fetlife profile because they were coming to town to visit and thought I'd be fun. I was wary that this was some kind of scam, but we went out to dinner and one thing led to another and we've been together ever since.
Before them, I was very heavy into etortic text-based roleplay involving diapers and furries and stuff like that. You used to find that through groups but now there's dedicated sites for it. Mostly I'd play as a furry canine dude but girls are so much in demand I made a few girl characters to take advantage of it. Now I just use AI, almost as good but way easier and quicker.
I still jack it regularly to women wearing diapers, the amount of quality content for this kind of thing is insanely easy to find, especially compared to a decade or two ago.
There's tons more I could write so if you have any questions 
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Apr 23, 2024 00:43
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NOW this is really all.
my own face but happy posted:In the winter of 2020 at kind of the height of Covid deaths and all that fear I went outside into the woods surrounding my house and planned to just sit down under a tree and die from the cold. I lost 3 close relatives to Covid and lost one of my best friends to the Q anon conspiracy and just felt like nothing was left for me.
As I was sitting under that tree I took my jacket off and then my shirt and pants and just sat there in my underwear. Started getting sleepy and figured "okay this is finally it". And then the sky lit up like it was daylight and when I looked up I saw a UFO hovering over me, about 100 feet in the air. It gave off this kind of energy field or something and I looked into this energy and saw someone looking back at me and smiling.
So then I don't know exactly what happened but I put my clothes back on and marched back into my house while this UFO shrank down to the size of a firefly and followed me around. And then I went inside and it flew away and I've never seen it again.
I went to go see a doctor the next day because I was worried maybe I had a tumor or maybe the cold gave me a stroke or maybe hallucinations are a side effect of hypothermia. I didn't tell him I planned suicide, just that I got "lost" in the woods and fell in a creek so I got wet and cold.
Rambling now but anyway he basically told me it was possible but as time has gone on I've realized it was real because I recognize the face I saw now; it was my own face but happy. Something I hadn't been for a long time at that point.
The other day I looked in the mirror and smiled and it all clicked. No idea what it means but it makes me feel like there's more to life than we know.
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Apr 24, 2024 02:21
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HELLO? THIS IS SERIOUS posted:Is there a way to find foreign nationals to date that aren't a sex trafficking scam? Considering I have no ties to any other countries, this seems like the best way to get out of the USA when Trump buttfucks it next year
This is a resubmission. Apparently "don't panic so hard about trump" or whatever the one original responder posted isn't helpful enough.
Either way, it is all there is because this thread has way more gawkers than contributions???
e: it was SWC and I summarized pretty well. ;3
burial fucked around with this message at 17:29 on May 2, 2024
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May 2, 2024 17:27
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but who can that goon marry?
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May 2, 2024 23:11
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 10, 2024 06:32
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Wow there's a bunch of activity in the anonymous confessions thread. I love anonymous confessions, better check it out
I am sorry.
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May 3, 2024 00:28
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Oct 30, 2021 15:09
