The feminist bookstore from Portlandia is angry!

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The feminist bookstore from Portlandia is angry!

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

bag em and tag em posted:

The feminist bookstore is angry. It rumbles and cracks have formed in the fiundation. The bookstore is angry and we do not know how to calm it.

lol

# ¿ Sep 30, 2016 19:30

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 09:42

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

The earth groans. A chill wind blows the withered leaves away from an ancient stone in which the following has been carved: THE FEMINIST BOOKSTORE FROM PORTLANDIA

# ¿ Oct 1, 2016 02:10

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

Porky Pig: The feminist a-behh-a-behh-a-behhh...

# ¿ Oct 1, 2016 02:13

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

Feminist bookstore from Portlandia SMASH!

# ¿ Oct 1, 2016 03:03

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

Roylicious posted:

We drove out the hipsters from the Great Rockies and Portlandia and took the First Hall. We slew many in the bright sun in the dale. Flói was killed by an arrow. He slew the great Vape... Flói under grass near Sturgeon... We have taken the Twenty-first Hall of Brentwood-Darlington to dwell in. There is good air ... that can easily be watched ... the 205 is clear ... Balin has set up his seat in the Chamber of Killingsworth... gathered ... IPAs ... wonderful lay Durin's Axe ... silver helm. Balin has taken them for his own. Balin is now lord of Portsmouth. ... today we found bookstore ... well-forged shelves ...n ... tomes made all of purest mithril ... Óin to seek for the upper shelves of the Third Floor ... go westwards to s... to Feminist gate.

r…(ye)ars since ... ready sorrow ... yesterday being the tenth of November Balin, lord of Killingsworth, fell in the Bookstore. He went alone to look in Sturgeon. A SJW shot him from behind a book. We slew the SJW, but many more ca(me) ... up from east up the Fairview ... we rescued Balin’s body ...re a sharp battle ... we have barred the gates but doubt if ... can hold them long. If there is ... no escape it will be a horrible fate to suffer, but I shall hold.

We cannot get out. We cannot get out. They have taken the bridge and I5. Frár and Lóni and Náli fell there bravely while the rest retr ... In Other Words. We still ho...g ... but hope u...n... Óin’s party went five days ago but today only four returned. The pool is up to the wall at Albina. The Watcher in the Florida Room took Óin -- we cannot get out. The end comes soon. We hear the bookstore, the bookstore in the deep.

The feminist bookstore from Portlandia roars its approval.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2016 11:42

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

Alan Smithee posted:

can i use da ladies room there

im a dudelord but i wonder if they will second guess

They only have a unisex bathroom and it looks like a bookstore so knock yourself out.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2016 14:53

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

# ¿ Oct 1, 2016 16:23

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

The proper place for a feminist bookstore is in the kitchen. The feminist bookstore should loosen up a bit, go out with that nice Barnes and Noble down the street.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2016 21:39

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

Just watched Inside Out (2015). I thought it was pretty good, particularly the way they dramatized the protagonist's emotional fluctuations through the characters of Joy, Sadness, Disgust, Fear, and Feminist Bookstore from Portlandia.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 00:00

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

[The end of The Mist, but The Mist is feminist bookstore from Portlandia]

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 00:40

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

Charles Foster Kane: (whispered, angrily) Feminist bookstore...from Portlandia.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 00:42

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

mysterious frankie posted:

I tried this to prove it:

This is after only twenty seconds of having the words feminist bookstore on my fridge. That book was some leftover ghost pepper chicken wings before. Also note the box wine (a woman's drink)

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 01:37

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

VERBAL KINT: (V.O) The greatest trick the feminist bookstore from Portlandia ever pulled was convincing the world it wasn't angry.

AGENT KUJAN stares at the bulletin board. His eyes grow wide.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 01:50

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

If my name was feminist bookstore from Portlandia... I'd tell people to just call me bookstore

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 07:50

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

skeevy achievements posted:

you mean these search/replace "feminist bookstore" in famous novel intros and such

hahaha

new gbs

u mad about it? Mad like a certain feminist bookstore I could mention?

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 16:08

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

skeevy acheivements is angry, probably because of something Portlandia did.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 16:09

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

Junkfist posted:

I wonder if the feminist bookstore from Portlandia sells books on how to make artisanal monkey cheese lol

Yeah probably next to the books on how to plug up your weeping vagina haha

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 17:08

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

Junkfist posted:

The feminist bookstore from Portlandia would never stoop to gendered insults.

Vagina is not an insult and weeping is to be commended as a disruption of patriarchal suppression of emotion.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 18:12

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 09:42

misty mountaintop: Jun 2, 2015; by Hand Knit

My vagina is weeping constantly, for the plight of women in the third world (Mississippi). Jealous? Angry? You should be joining it, at the feminist bookstore from Portlandia.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2016 18:13

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The feminist bookstore from Portlandia is angry!