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Condiv posted:You ever seen dragon ball z? Accepting Jesus into your heart is like going super Aryan irl
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Oct 29, 2016 14:05
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Don't forget the movie adaptation of Dark Dungeons. Which I swear to god knows how stupid the premise is and is taking the piss out of the entire thing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=subQrEPKytA (warning: JonTron. He's a guilty pleasure of mine) For instance it's not satan that's controlling everything! It's Cthulu! The 'Cool kids' are the 'RPGers' and everybody thinks they're so awesome and cool and wanna be part of their clique. 
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Oct 29, 2016 16:14
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E-Tank posted:Don't forget the movie adaptation of Dark Donjons. Which I swear to god knows how stupid the premise is and is taking the piss out of the entire thing. Gee, you think?
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Oct 29, 2016 18:06
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"Look, just because Zombie Orpheus mostly makes videos about DnD jokes, and it debuted at GenCon, doesn't mean it's automatically a satire." - Someone, probably.
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Oct 29, 2016 18:13
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Lurdiak posted:Gee, you think? I mean it's also just entirely possible that I'm an idiot too.
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Oct 29, 2016 21:22
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I think it's obvious it's tongue in cheek evene having not seen it now the question is whether or not it's worth a watch or is it "hurrr I hate monkey cheese"
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Oct 29, 2016 21:34
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Yeah, like, campy movies are generally funnier when the people making them think they're making something dreadfully serious. The reviews for Dark Dungeons do say that it's strengths are that the actors play it completely straight in the spirit of the original comic, but, not having seen it, I cannot judge for myself. If they pull that off, without winking at the camera too much, I'd actually be really impressed.
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Oct 30, 2016 05:00
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Bicyclops posted:Yeah, like, campy movies are generally funnier when the people making them think they're making something dreadfully serious. That's horse apples. They're all completely overacting and while nobody goes so far as to mug for the camera, they all sound like Chandler whenever they deliver any dramatic lines. That poo poo ain't no Lost Skeleton of Cadavra.
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Oct 30, 2016 07:55
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How does dark dungeons compare to mazes and monsters?
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Oct 30, 2016 17:32
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How is this not posted yet: https://thenib.com/jack-chick-goes-to-heaven?t=recent  By Bors. RuanGacho fucked around with this message at 17:48 on Oct 30, 2016 |
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Oct 30, 2016 17:44
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Lurdiak posted:That's horse apples. They're all completely overacting and while nobody goes so far as to mug for the camera, they all sound like Chandler whenever they deliver any dramatic lines. That poo poo ain't no Lost Skeleton of Cadavra. I would believe that and think that it is most likely, but not having seen it (and probably never devoting my time to it), I cannot claim to know it for sure.
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Oct 30, 2016 20:01
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Rush Limbo posted:God is kind of a wimp if a witch can gently caress up his divine plan and override his infinite love and compassion with a cheap curse on a piece of candy. yeah! how much evil can honestly fit in one fun sized snickers bar? it's gotta at least be one of those 2-in-1s or one of those ginormous bars you can get for Christmas, and no one's gonna give those out! 
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Oct 30, 2016 20:54
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Has anyone else looked into the sources and citations in Chick tracts? Hoo boy, there's some good stuff in there. Most of his anti-witchcraft and more conspiracy-leaning stuff is from Bill Schnoebelen, one of those obviously-lying "ex-Satanists" that were popular in the 80's and early 90's. He claimed that he was a high-ranking Satanic priest, a grandmaster Druid, a Wiccan high priest, a Knight Templar, a 90th degree Mason, a Gnostic bishop, a vampire, and a Mormon, all within about a 4 year period. He was a Catholic priest all throughout this, because the Catholic Church is secretly the source of all of these thungs. Oh, and he hosed a fallen angel once. I'm not sure which scenario I like better: either Jack Chick bought all of that bullshit hook, line, and sinker, or he knew it was bullshit, but he hated Catholics SO MUCH that he pushed it anyway.
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Oct 30, 2016 22:14
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Crunch Buttsteak posted:Oh, and he hosed a fallen angel once. Crunch Buttsteak posted:a 90th degree Mason
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Oct 30, 2016 22:17
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Chick's full length comics were even crazier then the tracts.     Also, Jack Chick has a unique interpretation of the American Civil War. The Confederacy was secretly a Satanist/Catholic theocracy He gets points for creativity at-least.    
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Nov 3, 2016 03:43
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So, Jack Chick though Protestants predate Catholics, or what?
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Nov 3, 2016 21:25
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The Early Church was the Best Church and then Satan told the Roman Emperor to create a rival to pervert the True Church and that's where the Roman Church came from until brave Protestants tried to reform it in the Reformation and created churches that are almost as good as the Early Church like the one I go to and none other. (What many KJV fundamentalists actually believe)
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Nov 3, 2016 21:42
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Guavanaut posted:The Early Church was the Best Church and then Satan told the Roman Emperor to create a rival to pervert the True Church and that's where the Roman Church came from until brave Protestants tried to reform it in the Reformation and created churches that are almost as good as the Early Church like the one I go to and none other. I wish jack chick had written about the cathars
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Nov 3, 2016 21:52
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Hobologist posted:So, Jack Chick though Protestants predate Catholics, or what? I can't remember the exact name of it. But he came from a sect that believes that the baptists were actually founded by a sect of Montanists that had been evading persecution by the RCC for 1500 years, which gives them more legitimacy than the RCC and also makes them "right". He also believed that only the first translation of the KJV Bible counted because you can only translate something out of latin once and you always get it right the first time and anything after that is the RCC trying to edit things to make them sound better.
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Nov 7, 2016 16:05
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Yeah, if I recall correctly, Jack Chick is a Independent Fundamentalist Baptist. It's a sect of Christianity that doesn't like calling itself Protestant, because Protestants are an offshoot of the Catholics, and Catholics are pure evil. Like, I cannot stress how much these people hate Catholics. In order to do this, they created an alternate history where TRUE Christianity stayed underground until fairly recently, and every church besides these hidden Shadow Churches has been doing it wrong for these past two millenia. However, they're also King James Only believers, so they simultaneously believe that they represent the true beliefs of the early church, but also, the true word of God was only given to us in the year 1611. In reality, Independent Baptist churches are a trend that just started a few decades ago, when a bunch of ultra-conservative pastors left the Southern Baptist Convention because they thought it was too liberal and effeminate. But if you ask them, True Baptists were behind everything good that has ever happened, and everything bad in history is because those crafty Jesuits. For example, the American Revolution wasn't about taxes or independence, it was the True Baptist army of the Lord fighting off Catholic influence! Really, Jack Chick can be seen as the ultimate example of Independent Baptist practice and beliefs. He expressed it through funny-looking cartoons instead of screaming it from a street corner, sure, but his beliefs essentially mirror "shock jock" pastors like Steven Anderson and Jason Cooley.
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Nov 7, 2016 17:57
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Kurieg posted:He also believed that only the first translation of the KJV Bible counted because you can only translate something out of latin once and you always get it right the first time and anything after that is the RCC trying to edit things to make them sound better. This is not actually the reason why he was KJV only. The reason he was KJV only is a little more involved. At the time the KJV was written, a lot of bibles used texts called the Textus Receptus for the basis of their translation. However, older manuscripts have been discovered, called the Alexandrian texts, and most current bible translations use these older texts. Now the problem is, the older texts and the Textus Receptus don't agree with each other, there are different wordings and phrases, and some passages don't appear in one or the other. Now, most people would assume that the older manuscripts, being older, are more faithful to the original texts, and that's why they're used. Chick, however, had a different point of view. According to his theology, God said that he would preserve and keep his word. Since Chick was big on conspiracy theories (especially involving the Catholics) and thinks that the Alexandrian texts are corruptions by Satan (since they have different wordings of verses or lack verses he thinks are vital to the identity/nature of God), we get his reasoning for the newer manuscripts being more faithful. The newer manuscripts were secretly hidden by true Christians to preserve God's word. The Catholic Church, however, worked hard to corrupt God's word, and since they were so big and powerful, their older manuscripts became more widespread. This is how the older copies are actually not faithful to the originals. There's a tract about it, filled with hilarious incorrect information. http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0031/0031_01.asp
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Nov 7, 2016 20:00
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My favorite dumb Chick tract is Flight 144 Which states that most actual missionary work is evil, and all you should do is tell people to worship Jesus and don't improve their lives at all so that they can die and go to heaven ASAP.Twelve by Pies posted:This is not actually the reason why he was KJV only. The reason he was KJV only is a little more involved.  I'm not sure which of his insane conspiracy theories is better, the devil planting ancient evil bible verses that weren't translated by KJV for some inscrutable reason or the Christian Ninjas that evaded capture long enough to found the baptist church.Probably the Ninjas.
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Nov 7, 2016 20:57
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Some reason this reminded me of like a selection menu on an old version of Civilization.
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Nov 7, 2016 22:42
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Or Street Fighter II.
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Nov 7, 2016 22:56
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Every time I see that I initially think the Jesuit is also the Satanist, but they're clearly holding different daggers if you put way too much effort into squinting at what little you can see of the hilt of the Satanist's.
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Nov 7, 2016 23:27
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It's jack chick, they probably are the same.
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Nov 7, 2016 23:37
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BooDoug187 posted:Some reason this reminded me of like a selection menu on an old version of Civilization. Crunch Buttsteak posted:Has anyone else looked into the sources and citations in Chick tracts? Hoo boy, there's some good stuff in there. How the gently caress did this dumb jackoff believe any of this poo poo. does he know all people Schnoebelen and Alberto Rivera are just shithead con men and he just wants his bullshit to be true so hard that he ignoirs it or was he just genuily that stupid.
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Nov 8, 2016 00:00
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BooDoug187 posted:Some reason this reminded me of like a selection menu on an old version of Civilization. Like most of Chick's villains, the Jesuits look rad as gently caress.
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Nov 8, 2016 00:40
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Dapper_Swindler posted:How the gently caress did this dumb jackoff believe any of this poo poo. does he know all people Schnoebelen and Alberto Rivera are just shithead con men and he just wants his bullshit to be true so hard that he ignoirs it or was he just genuily that stupid. A real Christian would never lie. Since Alberto Rivera accepted Jesus in the correct way that Jack Chick approved of, that meant he was a real Christian and thus everything he said was completely true. So yeah, he was just genuinely that stupid. Since Chick really hated Catholicism, he was eager to buy into a dumbass conspiracy theory that they're the cause of every evil thing in the world.
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Nov 8, 2016 01:36
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Twelve by Pies posted:A real Christian would never lie. Since Alberto Rivera accepted Jesus in the correct way that Jack Chick approved of, that meant he was a real Christian and thus everything he said was completely true. So yeah, he was just genuinely that stupid. Since Chick really hated Catholicism, he was eager to buy into a dumbass conspiracy theory that they're the cause of every evil thing in the world. Jack Chick is basically Confirmation Bias: the Human.
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Nov 8, 2016 01:52
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Twelve by Pies posted:A real Christian would never lie. Since Alberto Rivera accepted Jesus in the correct way that Jack Chick approved of, that meant he was a real Christian and thus everything he said was completely true. So yeah, he was just genuinely that stupid. Since Chick really hated Catholicism, he was eager to buy into a dumbass conspiracy theory that they're the cause of every evil thing in the world. indeed. jack chick reminds me alot of Kevin Swanson, who is probably the most bug gently caress crazy of the current crop of evangelicals. http://www.rightwingwatch.org/people/kevin-swanson/
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Nov 8, 2016 01:53
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Power Walrus posted:Like most of Chick's villains, the Jesuits look rad as gently caress. I'm university educated! HISSSSSSSSS
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Nov 8, 2016 03:17
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BooDoug187 posted:Some reason this reminded me of like a selection menu on an old version of Civilization. In contrast, Jack Chick was simply convinced that every religious position other than his particular kind of Christianity was straight from Satan.
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Nov 8, 2016 03:19
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Why do Jesuits get a special (rad) appearance outside of Catholics?
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Nov 8, 2016 04:14
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Probably because Jesuits are substantially cooler than the rest of Catholicism so they're turbo evil to Chick.
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Nov 8, 2016 04:25
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A big flaming stink posted:Why do Jesuits get a special (rad) appearance outside of Catholics? Duh.
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Nov 8, 2016 07:32
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To understand Jack Chick's worldview, just take the plot of the Assassin's Creed games, and then replace "Assassin" with "True Baptist Christian" and "Templar" with "Catholic Jesuit scum". Like, I'm not even joking, that's seriously how they look at history and the world around them.
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Nov 8, 2016 08:07
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Kro-Bar posted:Yeah, I believe that's him. I guess it's official: There are more photos of Jack Chick than of Bill Watterson. (For a while though, the only picture of Chick anyone could find was a yearbook photo.)
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Nov 8, 2016 09:20
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A big flaming stink posted:Why do Jesuits get a special (rad) appearance outside of Catholics?
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Nov 8, 2016 11:08
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A big flaming stink posted:Why do Jesuits get a special (rad) appearance outside of Catholics? As previously mentioned Chick already disliked Catholics due to his version of Christianity, which meant when a conman named Alberto Rivera started making the circuit in the 70s he was predisposed to take him at his word. Rivera was running around giving all the talking points that Chick would use in his Jesuits tracts. Making claims about how he was a secret Bishop in the Jesuits and that they were behind the scenes of everything bad in the world. The thing is, even in the 70s his claims were pretty easily disputed. Mostly because he made up lies about himself that were verifiable, like what country he was living in at the time.
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Nov 8, 2016 12:54
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