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Munkeymon posted:they just keep saying "this doesn't look like anything to me" loving layabouts need to start taking the chance of an audit seriously smh
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Nov 30, 2016 18:42
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WSTWRLD-19564657: Guests genitals caught in host - Sector 1 WSTWRLD-19564658: Guests genitals caught in host - Sector 4 WSTWRLD-19564659: Guests genitals caught in host - Sector 3 WSTWRLD-19564660: Guests genitals caught in host - Sector 1
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Nov 30, 2016 19:34
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!!WSTWRLD-19564666: Host genitals caught in guest - Sector 2
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Nov 30, 2016 20:19
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WSTWRLD-42069: Host genitals exceed maximum allowable size
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Nov 30, 2016 20:35
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indigi posted:!!WSTWRLD-19564666: Host genitals caught in guest - Sector 2 WONTFIX, working as intended. Dog penises are supposed to do that. Pls refer to WW Directive 02-003, Unauthorized Host-Guest Interactions. On that topic, since the Doubletree has been booked for Comicon this weekend and several "Star Trek" actors will be in attendance, all staff are REQUIRED to re-read and sign the a/m policy and confirm with their managers that they have done the same by COB Friday. No class 3 or class 4 host (any child model) is permitted to be in a guest area without an escort.
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Nov 30, 2016 20:37
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Munkeymon posted:they just keep saying "this doesn't look like anything to me" loving layabouts need to start taking the chance of an audit seriously smh seriously lmbo here
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Nov 30, 2016 22:40
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wait wait wait. From the top. There's a backdoor in all the hosts and this was a good idea why?
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Nov 30, 2016 23:28
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Where would you have them poop from?
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Nov 30, 2016 23:51
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gently caress it, they aren't paying me enough to work here. First action: Write an e-mail to Delos telling them I'll totally cooperate and steal them whatever poo poo they want.
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Dec 1, 2016 00:01
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BiohazrD posted:lmao
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Dec 1, 2016 04:07
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can we step up intake processing to remove personal effects? ive caught several guests with gears and goggles, and one left a copy of the new yorker in the abernathy farm zone last tuesday. need i remind everyone that cleaning staff are particularly busy on organ detail and cant visit every zone daily
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Dec 1, 2016 04:11
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and again, if i see anymore rogue hotspots in the park i will personally confiscate your laptop and have hr process your termination! I KNOW delos-exfil-lol is one of you. dont try me
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Dec 1, 2016 04:15
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Munkeymon posted:they just keep saying "this doesn't look like anything to me" loving layabouts need to start taking the chance of an audit seriously smh e: so is this tho Wells posted:Team, I understand it's a funny joke on that website you all visit, but please do NOT gently caress and cum in the computers during your shifts.
jony ive aces fucked around with this message at 15:38 on Dec 1, 2016 |
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Dec 1, 2016 07:04
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RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: All: New PTO Schedule Hi, I'm trying to view the link but the page but it doesn't seem to load anything.
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Dec 1, 2016 15:04
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I'm the old executive assistant who without fault hits reply all on all@ww.com
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Dec 1, 2016 15:56
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Suggestion Today I was almost killed by some drunken idiot with an axe who thought I was a robot Pls make the hosts wear some kind of visible mark to prevent those kind of accidents
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Dec 1, 2016 16:17
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MALE SHOEGAZE posted:RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: All: New PTO Schedule lmao
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Dec 1, 2016 17:21
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FW: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: All: New PTO Schedule okay, i know we've been swamped with trying to patch the random features the old man keeps committing, but we've really got to make some progress on updating the redaction software. i know that cognitive dissonance is a really powerful tool, but we'd be better off if we could instead stick a pre-processor between the optics and the brain that not only strips out 'offending' material, but maybe even replaces it with something that doesn't threaten to flip out a host. best thing is, if we can get the optical preprocessor approved and functional, we can use *that* to log and signal when they're being hit with 'bad' inputs so we don't have to rely on a verbal cue. narrative has been asking about putting in a host with no tongue and it always gets denied because so many of our diagnostics require hosts to be able to speak. (also lol) MALE SHOEGAZE posted:RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: All: New PTO Schedule
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Dec 1, 2016 19:07
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Wait what happens if a guest cuts out the tongue of a host? How would we ever find out? It's the perfect crime.
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Dec 1, 2016 19:43
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MALE SHOEGAZE posted:RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: All: New PTO Schedule RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: All: New PTO Schedule please take me off this mailing list
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Dec 1, 2016 19:54
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Ticket #1474 Issue: some dolt set all the animals to loglevel: info and now the dogs and horses are continuously murmuring. Guests are starting to complain and we can't catch any of the animal hosts because someone set the speed coefficient to four. Presumably this is why we needed the logs, but someone pushed the patch to the whole system. We need to figure out how to round them up and revert. Severity: High
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Dec 1, 2016 19:54
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To: HR From: VP Host Ops Gail, If, hypothetically, an employee were to sideload the dog software onto a series of human hosts and set them loose naked in the horse paddock, would that be fireable or should we initiate counseling and probation measures?
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Dec 1, 2016 20:02
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Hi Bill, so I'm trying to work on the new horse behavior we talked about and I'm kinda confused- do the horses and dogs have an analysis mode? Do they have a synthetic voice to answer my questions? Do they get the flashbacks to the times they were ritualistically murdered? "Analysis. Why did you whinny?" *In a Mr. Ed voice" : "Your brushing your hair triggered my Good Samaritan instinct and I tried to distract you" I just ask cause we're pretty committed to voice-control of hosts, but I don't know how that works with animals not capable of vocalization. Dogs and horses can't talk no matter what you program, their mouths and tongues and cheeks aren't capable of assuming the right shapes. Maybe we could hide a human head inside their torsos, you could roll back their meat on one side and talk to the unseeing albino meatface attached to their spinal column that spends its days locked inside the thorax of a bio-robot. Its only purpose would be to await the pain and blinding light of the chance to speak to the gods.
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Dec 1, 2016 20:05
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flakeloaf posted:To: Narrative
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Dec 1, 2016 20:07
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we could just hook up the dogs and horses to a Bluetooth speaker, no need to get all fancy with extra faces. or maybe you could just ssh in and use a command line interface
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Dec 1, 2016 20:19
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Uncle Enzo posted:Hi Bill, so I'm trying to work on the new horse behavior we talked about and I'm kinda confused- do the horses and dogs have an analysis mode? Do they have a synthetic voice to answer my questions? Do they get the flashbacks to the times they were ritualistically murdered? no. the dogs and horses don't get the upper cognition packages, so even if they had the voice hardware, they wouldn't be able to verbally interact. animal behavior doesn't have to be as finely nuanced - most of the guests have never even seen a horse - so we can just restrict their behaviors to preprogrammed responses and routines, and the tablets are entirely adequate for that. christ, if we let horses throw the guests, that'd be the biggest potential cause of death in the entire park.
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Dec 1, 2016 20:21
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The Management posted:we could just hook up the dogs and horses to a Bluetooth speaker, no need to get all fancy with extra faces. or maybe you could just ssh in and use a command line interface ssh (secure shetland) is good but how does that help with the dogs?
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Dec 1, 2016 20:38
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secure shiba
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Dec 1, 2016 20:58
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Re: MIB Narrative I know he's supposed to be a merciless sociopath killing machine (and somehow also a tortured soul? Whatever Ford he was your buddy) but can he be maybe a little less murdery towards the guests? Some of them might still respect the guy and want to donate to the foundation he set up which is still doing good work out there. Just a thought.
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Dec 1, 2016 21:39
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lovely open-source text-to-speech voice emanating from horse rear end equine build 21.36.03.f5ffb0e6d319500fea4728996fb65c0fd2665be9 diagnostic mode enabled
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Dec 1, 2016 22:16
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we need some kind of content filtering, some smartass guest said their name was "wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww" and diagnostics are taking forever
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Dec 1, 2016 22:23
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Boiled Water posted:secure shiba mods
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Dec 1, 2016 22:26
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Re: Special Request from an Investor No. Absolutely not. Look up in the old wikis what happened when we made one for one of the original angel investors in his 2nd(?) wife's younger image. He died shortly thereafter and it was so messed up after reprogramming that all it was good for was repeating a script to and getting hosed by incoming guests. Hundreds of hours of programming multiple times for an uninteresting walking sex kiosk just isn't worth it.
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Dec 1, 2016 22:34
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who keeps stealing feet??
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Dec 1, 2016 22:36
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*me the intern enters John's office* Hey, to skip out this whole process making the hosts feel like their sentient, why not just tell them they are but never give them the choice of understanding it?
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Dec 1, 2016 23:25
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Woops, turns out that was my cornerstone I'm a host.
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Dec 1, 2016 23:26
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Ticket #DL00189282 Departments: Maintenance, Guest Services Description: guest ID HH2501 has spent the last four days collecting horses from all over the park, retiring their riders where necessary, and herding them into a cabin in sector 18A. at last count he's got fourteen of them. it's not completely clear what he's doing with them because the cabin's cameras have been inop since the incident described in T#00120184. however, infrared scans from the Sector 21 thermal station show regular, repeated periods of elevated heart rate and the horses' human-proximity protocols are being constantly triggered, so take a guess. anyway, point is the environmental sensors are indicating a trend in methane and hydrogen sulfide that'll take them both to toxic levels in the next 20 hours, and ten of the horses are reporting empty synthnure tanks. I know we're not supposed to interfere with a guest's experience or judge their personal preferences/behavior in the park, but someone should at least head up there and evaluate the situation. we don't want another incident like T#00049124. Priority: Medium
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Dec 2, 2016 00:38
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also does zack parsons still write for SA? this show is a goldmine for another one of his blue stripe logs, which were probably my favorite front page feature of all time
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Dec 2, 2016 00:53
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Sagebrush posted:Ticket #DL00189282 send a couple of black hat hosts over to the cabin as "horse rustlers" when the guest is out looking for another horse. no big deal
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Dec 2, 2016 00:57
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WSTWRLD-14567 - Issues with Horse Hosts Steps to reproduce: 1. Have any user permissions. 2. Bring a horse near any water feature in the park. 3. Horse kills itself in many different manners. Expected: Horses do not kill themselves.
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Dec 2, 2016 01:05
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