\W/estworld group policy implementation plan

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > \W/estworld group policy implementation plan

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

proposal: some kind of checkin/checkout procedures for behavior/qa/bodyshop host control tablets. these things are just getting passed around wherever, some have even gone missing! why were these not remotely wiped immediately??? each device should be hardcoded to exactly one person. these things have way too many privileges to just let any rando hand them to whoever

outdated hosts policy: i know they're deactivated and all, but it really seems like a bad idea to put creatures with every reason to hate humans all together, in a huge dark room, with no one watching them. maybe they could be laid down in bunkbeds in smaller, locked rooms? at my old job we'd demag and drill through old hard drives. maybe we could do something like that here?

# ¿ Nov 28, 2016 16:13

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 10, 2024 21:12

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

ok let me get this straight: we have a codebase that is capable of more-or-less sentience, making it one of the most valuable things in history

we have no secure off-site backups?? WTF people, how hard is it to throw this stuff on tape and stick a copy in one of those vault facilities in like kansas or something

even a once-yearly sample of just one of the more-patched hosts would at least give us something to start with if something happened. like, i know the facility is super-underground and is a hardened facility already, but you mean there's no master backup?

what if a state-level actor tried to get a copy? think big people, i don't see any AA capability, i don't see perimeter patrols, gently caress there's not even cell service in large swaths of the park. what's stopping someone from just waltzing in, incapacitating a host, and taking it back out?

# ¿ Nov 28, 2016 18:20

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Mad Wack posted:

reduce host programming complexity to install bitcoin miners - we'll be rich!

filing ticket to have this employee's host-access credentials revoked, please do the needful

have a blessed day

# ¿ Nov 28, 2016 19:08

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Optimus_Rhyme posted:

this is it, the worst thread in YOSPOS, nay, the forums, NO! the world!

these violent posts have violent ends

# ¿ Nov 28, 2016 20:54

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

suggestion:

isolate a small area of the park for beta testing. we put maybe 20-40 hosts in there full time that get all the patches that the ones in the park do, except they get them first. we have a group of people (note: we're going to need some real sickos) who do everything to the hosts that the guests do. after a week in beta, the patches can be rolled out to the rest of the park, incrementally. new narratives get tested here first.

this whole "throwing patches straight to production with no review or testing" thing has got to stop. we're only pretending to be the wild west, people.

# ¿ Nov 30, 2016 15:03

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

uhhh you guys know Jane, the new Behavior intern? she was assigned to review some of the old core code as an onboarding exercise and ummm

code:


while VoiceCommand.Interpret == TRUE:{
    if HumanName == 'RobertFord':{
        call BaseHostState.MurderMode.Enable()
        }
    }

this code uses the wrong brackets and indentation, how is anyone supposed to know what this does? we've talked about this, people

# ¿ Nov 30, 2016 17:25

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Hi Bill, so I'm trying to work on the new horse behavior we talked about and I'm kinda confused- do the horses and dogs have an analysis mode? Do they have a synthetic voice to answer my questions? Do they get the flashbacks to the times they were ritualistically murdered?

"Analysis. Why did you whinny?"

*In a Mr. Ed voice" : "Your brushing your hair triggered my Good Samaritan instinct and I tried to distract you"

I just ask cause we're pretty committed to voice-control of hosts, but I don't know how that works with animals not capable of vocalization. Dogs and horses can't talk no matter what you program, their mouths and tongues and cheeks aren't capable of assuming the right shapes.

Maybe we could hide a human head inside their torsos, you could roll back their meat on one side and talk to the unseeing albino meatface attached to their spinal column that spends its days locked inside the thorax of a bio-robot. Its only purpose would be to await the pain and blinding light of the chance to speak to the gods.

# ¿ Dec 1, 2016 20:05

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

flakeloaf posted:

To: Narrative
From: VP Host Ops

Gail,

If, hypothetically, an employee were to sideload the dog software onto a series of human hosts and set them loose naked in the horse paddock, would that be ~~fireable or should we initiate counseling and probation measures?~~ a good idea for a new narrative?

# ¿ Dec 1, 2016 20:07

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

hobbesmaster posted:

mesa suckers.

then again Stubbs and Elsie arguing with each other got really old after about 15 minutes

their banter did a good job of conveying that she wasn't interested in him and found him tiresome.

it seemed like he was Paying Attention which is a rare thing in TV, usually you've got the one "smart person" who's cocky and smarmy and everyone else is just plodding along being a dumbass. Stubbs learned more than he was told and knew more than he told others. i hope he's back in season 2. he was the only person who took the threat from the hosts seriously and appreciated that their only protection was a constantly-changing blob of code that nobody really understood.

"Freeze all motor functions!"

*host keeps coming*

*shits pants*
*that was their one and only line of defense and they have no plan whatsoever for if that doesn't work*

# ¿ Dec 6, 2016 18:15

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Ticket: #5096756897

Subject: Panic Buttons

Hi, would it be possible to get some emergency stop buttons in the exam rooms? We bring in hosts that are doing some pretty violent stuff, or got locked into philosophical debates with guests, or had people attempt to compromise their computing integrity with Bluetooth or showing bitmaps taking up their field of view. We had one host that some clever kid had strapped a VR helmet onto, the host was almost convinced the guest was actually a park administrator. Maybe the exam rooms could have a big red button on one wall that when hit sends a wireless hard-shutdown command and summons a response team? There's emergency shutoffs on gas pumps, seems like semi-autonomous robots with knives warrant some safeguards.

# ¿ Dec 6, 2016 18:27

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Dj Meow Mix posted:

Well it's fall and I'd like to highlight a ticket we've had sitting in the backlog since it's suddenly relevant.

Ticket #12573489
When the host's temperature modules detect sixty-nine degrees fahrenheit the host has the word 'Nice' added to the audio queue.

Someone (and I won't name names) is marking this as wont-fix but I don't think that's gonna fly.

related: when you ask a host when they were born they all say 4/20/69

this isn't a bug, i'm just mentioning it

# ¿ Dec 6, 2016 20:33

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Tunicate posted:

So I just checked the performance review code and it looks like there's a minus sign missing or something, because it's hooked into the HR mental wellness program, and 'experiencing frequent suicidal ideation' gives you about a hundred points toward a promotion.

I mean I guess that explains why everyone in management ends up killing themselves but way to gently caress up.

finally a place i can succeed

# ¿ Dec 6, 2016 23:19

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

theflyingexecutive posted:

the entire intro is shots of their amazing 100000-axis fab machinery and y'all think they're using robots with fat human fingers to make their old west knicknacks? smdh

yeah 3d printing is nice for custom one-offs like the hosts, but there's no economies of scale for if you need to crank out winchester rifles and shirts and boots and wagon wheels. hence the retired hosts operating garment machinery

# ¿ Dec 7, 2016 18:28

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

frees allmo torfunctions

# ¿ Dec 12, 2016 14:58

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 10, 2024 21:12

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

quote:

DELOS Press Release: For Immediate Distribution

There has been a widely reported incident where one or more guests claim they were attacked by the hosts in Westworld(tm). We at DELOS take this matter very seriously, and we have completed an internal investigation.

...

... In fact, none of the hosts that were supposedly involved in the park showed any operational abnormalities. Logs from the hosts show that all safety protocols were operating normally. The guests did not in fact give the proper safety commands. Viewing the host verbal transcript logs, the guests lodging these specious accusations in fact were clearly understood to be saying "Free zall mote, or functions". This is clearly not the correct phrase. Guests claiming assault are reminded that DELOS takes any accusations of misconduct very seriously and will take legal action if necessary to protect its good name.

Anyone alleging wrongdoing is reminded that DELOS maintains extensive logs and algorithms don't have bias.

# ¿ Dec 12, 2016 18:20

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > \W/estworld group policy implementation plan