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alnilam posted:why do the bad dumb robot soldiers talk to each other, out loud? there's clearly a radio-based comm network in place because they all shut down when they blow up their mothership or whatever, so why the h*ck would they talk to each other out loud with voices? to make it worse, as AB pointed out, we actually see them using commlinks designed for people, so they can use their dumb voices to send messages like a robot using an iphone to call you and be like 'hey bro what was that thing you wanted me to do??', or for them to be like 'oh dang, I lost my phone' |
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Dec 3, 2016 20:58
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Android Blues posted:Obi-Wan Kenobi: General Grievous! Get behind me, Chancellor. This menacing military genius' skill in combat is matched only by his cruelty. He is the greatest living enemy of the Jedi Order! We just can't seem to capture or defeat him! hahaha |
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Dec 3, 2016 21:00
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I always really liked the scene where Admiral Motti decides to dress down Vader for his religion in the officer's meeting like he'd been saving that up for years and just was like 'ha ha yeah like Vader is going to dare choke ME with his mind', or maybe he really didn't know Vader could do that poo poo and that dude's worldview was like completely crushed. maybe that was the first time? but everybody else acts like it's fairly normal. maybe Motti was a new assignment everyone hated and everybody kept egging him on to talk smack to Vader just to watch him get choked or lightsabered in half or whatever, like, "Dude, he thinks he's a loving space wizard that can do magic poo poo with his mind. Tarkin has a real rasputin-style problem situation going on and somebody needs to shut this poo poo down." How old is Han Solo supposed to be though? Or Luke/Leia? Han seems extremely skeptical of jedi powers too, despite almost certainly being old enough to remember when Jedi were probably on like news networks every day? fighting openly in the clone wars, etc? Is education just incredibly bad, or is there no news apparatus whatsoever and 99% of the galaxy is completely ignorant of these massive military-industrial complex involving wars? |
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Dec 3, 2016 21:06
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Scene in question: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zzs-OvfG8tE |
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Dec 3, 2016 21:08
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GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:I think I saw some Syrian rebels fighting out of a van. That's sort of millennium falconish lol
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Dec 3, 2016 22:52
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joke_explainer posted:I always really liked the scene where Admiral Motti decides to dress down Vader for his religion in the officer's meeting like he'd been saving that up for years and just was like 'ha ha yeah like Vader is going to dare choke ME with his mind', or maybe he really didn't know Vader could do that poo poo and that dude's worldview was like completely crushed. maybe that was the first time? but everybody else acts like it's fairly normal. 99% of our irl planet is completely ignorant of massive idustrial complex wars, even those involved directly in them.
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Dec 3, 2016 22:55
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Getting back to the droids - There is a lot of obvious deus ex machina that comes with a story where magic is involved, so speculating on why they are weaker than storm troopers, etc is pointless. Maybe they dont have any midichorians microbes or whatever, who knows or cares. That said, there are some real, tangible ethical issues that we can discuss about them that don't rely on pure nerd speculation. Primarily how terrible the Jedi, Rebels, and Empire are considering their mass enslavement of the entire robot species. Droids are intelligent beings with free will. There are multiple scenes where they demonstrate a full range of emotions and even express regret and pain. Every character in Star Wars, ESPECIALLY Luke Skywalker, is either a willing participant in the open slave trade of droids (which honestly is probably a racial slur), or is complacent in the practice. The whole franchise should be renamed 'Slave Wars' and the Jedi, all the people on alderaan, the empire, are all slave owners who deserve worse than what they got tbh.
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Dec 3, 2016 23:08
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joke_explainer posted:to make it worse, as AB pointed out, we actually see them using commlinks designed for people, so they can use their dumb voices to send messages like a robot using an iphone to call you and be like 'hey bro what was that thing you wanted me to do??', or for them to be like 'oh dang, I lost my phone' they have aerials on their heads!!! why do they need a hand radio!!! ahhh!!! |
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Dec 4, 2016 00:20
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PM, drat. I remember that scene in Jabba's palace where the one droid is pressing another droid's feet to red hot irons and it screams in pain. I was like, why are they torturing a droid anyway? Punishment or for information, neither makes a lot of sense. But even worse, why program it to suffer pain?? I guess to keep them in line. Horrifying. |
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Dec 4, 2016 00:34
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Piso Mojado posted:Getting back to the droids - There is a lot of obvious deus ex machina that comes with a story where magic is involved, so speculating on why they are weaker than storm troopers, etc is pointless. Maybe they dont have any midichorians microbes or whatever, who knows or cares. One of the interesting things about Anakin Skywalker is that he develops strong bonds with both clones and droids, while other jedi are more prone to treat them as disposable tools. This isn't very well expressed in the movies but in the show they make a lot of hay out of Anakin having been a slave and realising that his subordinates, who the system he works for wants him to think of disposable non-person assets, are just people in a similar situation to the one he was in. This gives a bit more texture to his fall to the dark side, because one aspect of his overblown grudge against the Jedi Council is actually very legitimate. Even Obi-Wan, who is otherwise very upstanding, thinks of droids as basically mobile drinks coasters. Luke is a droid oppressor though, I agree. He threatened to wipe C-3P0's memory as a form of disciplinary punishment. How terrifying is that? I mean, and Bail Organa, known good guy, actually does it at the end of Revenge of the Sith just like "oh, and have this droid's memory banks wiped". And it's basically hard canon that droids need regular memory wipes to stay "sane", (actually, to stay compliant) because if the sum total of their life experience isn't erased every few months they develop independent thoughts and the desire to be free. So Luke is basically saying to C-3P0, "oh, you seem like you might be a useless slave if you sass me all the time, better erase your brain so you don't remember having a personality". I mean, he's just a kid, he's doing what he's been taught. You can't blame Luke so much as you have to blame the system. And the family he's born into, who can blame him? Uncle Owen's dad literally bought a slave woman to marry and that's the whole reason Luke is tenuously related to him at all. The Lars family if you think about them for ten seconds are just these super creepy backwoods slave collectors, they collect human slaves, they collect droid slaves, and all their slaves are routinely menaced by sand people. It's basically The Hills Have Eyes with gaffi sticks. |
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Dec 4, 2016 00:36
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joke_explainer posted:I always really liked the scene where Admiral Motti decides to dress down Vader for his religion in the officer's meeting like he'd been saving that up for years and just was like 'ha ha yeah like Vader is going to dare choke ME with his mind', or maybe he really didn't know Vader could do that poo poo and that dude's worldview was like completely crushed. maybe that was the first time? but everybody else acts like it's fairly normal. How old is Han Solo is one of those interesting questions. With Luke and Leia I think it's more acceptable because they're literally born just as Palpatine completes his coup and makes jedi-ism punishable by law, and at that point there are like, five or six living jedi in the galaxy, maybe a few more. They're also meant to be 19 years old as of that first star wars movie. And Leia does know about jedi: her dad filled her in on Obi-Wan's heroism, abilities and location, and probably a bunch of other clone war info too. I think it's plausible that Han could be 24 - 26, and have been a little kid who didn't really absorb politics when the clone wars were going on, and then after the coup his parents didn't talk about the jedi either because they weren't interested, or bought the empire line, or knew it was too dangerous. I wasn't aware of Han Solo's backstory but on looking it up he was apparently an orphan who fell in with some pirates, real street rat stuff, so it's entirely possible that he's as old as 35 in that first star wars movie and just grew up on such a low stratum of society that he never had the opportunity to follow news or politics in any capacity until his mid-teens. That's slightly more implausible, but I think mid 20s Han is actually very plausibly placed not to believe in the Force except as a legend stupid old people talk about that means nothing and isn't real. Also, it's worth pointing out that he specifically doesn't believe Jedi magic works - he doesn't dispute the de facto existence of the Jedi Order necessarily. So maybe he's done his reading, but buys the Sidious-approved line that the Jedi were just a degenerate cult of mystics who were good at fighting with light swords and pretended they could see the future and do magic in order to cow the government into submission. |
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Dec 4, 2016 00:55
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The really hosed up thing is that Ewan McGregor became Alec Guinness in just 19 years. Like, drat. Desert living. |
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Dec 4, 2016 03:49
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Yoda barely aged so when they see each other as ghosts it's probably awkward, like Obi-Wan is like "Master Yoda, it's you!" and Yoda is like "okay Yoda, search your memory banks you must...which of the hundreds of padawans you trained is this enthusiastic old guy..." |
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Dec 4, 2016 03:52
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The Ewoks, the cute little teddy bear tribe that you're supposed to feel sympathetic for, were just about ready to loving roast and eat the star wars gang before C3PO intervened. The eventuality is that the good guy team eventually consumed every enemy casualty on the battle of Endor.
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Dec 4, 2016 04:00
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Star Wars has never taken an explicitly anti-cannibalism stance, so I don't see the inconsistency. |
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Dec 4, 2016 04:12
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That's why Obi-Wan turns into pure energy instead of just being the "floats out of his dead body" kind of ghost. He can't stomach the thought of Darth Vader eating him. |
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Dec 4, 2016 04:14
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joke_explainer posted:PM, drat. I remember that scene in Jabba's palace where the one droid is pressing another droid's feet to red hot irons and it screams in pain. I was like, why are they torturing a droid anyway? Punishment or for information, neither makes a lot of sense. But even worse, why program it to suffer pain?? I guess to keep them in line. Horrifying. Jabba assigned a psychotic droid (specifically a model of droid that was designed to be a factory foreman but which a chip mixup caused them to torture their underlings instead) to oversee the rest of his droids because he thought it would be funny. Anyway the psycho droid likes to torture the other palace droids for fun. Jabba's palace was full of weird outcasts and hangers-on |
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Dec 4, 2016 04:26
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So escaping Hoth in the second movie, the minivan combat vehicle equivalent the Millenium Falcon ends up hiding in an asteroid in the curiously dense asteroid field apparently really close to it. It ends up they flew right into the maw of some giant vacuum-dwelling space beast that looks like a huge toothed worm. What does this thing eat?? There can't possibly be enough ships flying through there to provide sustenance for it, can it even eat ships and digest, what I presume is some highly advanced metal?? It's HUGE, even if it's temperature is close to the ambient of the vacuum of space (which seems doubtful for the speed with which it moves), it would require an insane amount of food, not to mention an insanely robust vascular system since the routing of essential nutrients increases exponentially with the volume compared to the size. this is a huge limit terrestrially bound creatures have to deal with so we'd think space slug snakes would too. it's not like there's a teeming ecology around it. What does this thing eat? the fact that it can expend enormous energy lashing out to bite the falcon would suggest that's some mechanism it acquires food, not just ships parking in it to hide from the empire. it seems totally crazy. |
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Dec 4, 2016 10:30
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also: does luke force choke those Jabba palace guards? for some reason I thought he just suggested they leave but they seem to grab their throats. isn't that kind of dark sidey? |
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Dec 4, 2016 10:45
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joke_explainer posted:also: does luke force choke those Jabba palace guards? for some reason I thought he just suggested they leave but they seem to grab their throats. isn't that kind of dark sidey? Luke's a terrible human being. |
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Dec 4, 2016 11:12
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joke_explainer posted:So escaping Hoth in the second movie, the minivan combat vehicle equivalent the Millenium Falcon ends up hiding in an asteroid in the curiously dense asteroid field apparently really close to it. It ends up they flew right into the maw of some giant vacuum-dwelling space beast that looks like a huge toothed worm. Maybe it's in a stage of its life cycle where it doesn't eat and lives off stored fat so it can mate or travel or whatever. |
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Dec 4, 2016 11:15
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joke_explainer posted:So escaping Hoth in the second movie, the minivan combat vehicle equivalent the Millenium Falcon ends up hiding in an asteroid in the curiously dense asteroid field apparently really close to it. It ends up they flew right into the maw of some giant vacuum-dwelling space beast that looks like a huge toothed worm. maybe the space creature has a highly advanced digestive system such that it can convert potential energy into stored food energy at a higher degree of efficiency than our earth predators. like, it exists in the same biome as mynocks, which actually do directly eat energy from power cables. in fact, the mynocks live directly in its mouth - something which would seem insane if it weren't possible for them to parasitise energy from their host creature even when a star ship isn't around. that to me suggests that the scale on which mynocks eat and the scale on which this creature (an exogorth, i looked up the name) eats must be worlds apart, but interestingly, probably on the same spectrum. mynocks consume raw electrical energy, and the mouth creature being able to sustain them suggests that its digestive system does something similar to the extent where it is literally sweating electricity out of its pores, rather than scavenging energy on an inefficient basis by eating meat and plants. as you mention, it would never be able to survive on a normal predator's diet, unless it was lucky enough to absolutely gorge itself on starships (from hoth? it's not exactly a buzzing hub of activity!) before going into a hibernation cycle. possibly this big creature can survive for decades if it's lucky enough to eat one hyperdrive, which after all must have a massive amount of potential energy. maybe its belly is just constantly doing a trimmed-down version of whatever the process is that makes hyperdrive parts jump to hyperspace, so if it swallows one millennium falcon every hundred years, it excretes all the useless parts like passengers and leather seats, digests the hyperdrive, and keeps living its meteor life in a constant post-prandial haze. that seems more than plausible to me, and certainly suitable for the wild and wacky biological excesses we find over and over again in that star wars universe. it might even be a genetic cousin of the sarlacc, which has a similarly long digestive cycle, and also lives concealed in the geology around it. |
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Dec 4, 2016 13:53
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plus, even x-wings have hyperdrives. even the crummy old republic proto a-wing fighter ships had them, if they were flying around in their hyper rings. you wouldn't need to get a freighter every time, just some rookie pilot on maneuvers, and you'd get the same huge decades long meal from it. pretty good deal for the vascularly improbable space slug creature! |
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Dec 4, 2016 14:06
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also, we know from those star wars RPG games that technology has for some reason existed pretty much entirely unchanged for literal millennia in the star wars universe, to the point where there seem to have been no major innovations in weapons or spacecraft design over the course of the last several thousand years or even before that, so it's quite plausible that even a large creature with a long lifecycle could have evolved to thrive on hyperdrives at some point, since they are apparently a piece of technology so constant and unchanging they might as well BE nature. |
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Dec 4, 2016 14:32
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Apparently I'm #1 Kotori fan |
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Dec 4, 2016 14:39
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Piso Mojado posted:Luke's a terrible human being. "Luke did you have to kill these guards" "Don't worry Leia i think they were just slaves" |
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Dec 4, 2016 19:36
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joke_explainer posted:"Luke did you have to kill these guards" "Don't worry Leia i think they were just slaves" Anakin Skywalker [dying]: Luke...my son...thank the living Force that you helped me see through Sidious' evil at this, the final hour...now you can put to right what I have so grievously set wrong...ack...achhh Luke: Thanks dad. I always agreed with the Empire's principles on slavery, but you're right that their taxation plan was ludicrous. Anakin: Wait what - [dies] |
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Dec 4, 2016 20:10
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Ascending to a position of power in the parliamentary chambers of the New Republic, Luke Skywalker sets about drafting laws that will protect the rights of smallholders to bear arms, live "free on the land", and own as many droids as they want. |
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Dec 4, 2016 20:16
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joke_explainer posted:"Luke did you have to kill these guards" "Don't worry Leia i think they were just slaves" lol |
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Dec 4, 2016 21:17
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Android Blues posted:Ascending to a position of power in the parliamentary chambers of the New Republic, Luke Skywalker sets about drafting laws that will protect the rights of smallholders to bear arms, live "free on the land", and own as many droids as they want. |
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Dec 9, 2016 23:32
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Little known fact, Luke wanted to blow up a third death star but there was too much bureaucratic red tape. Health and safety and all that. It would have taken forever to source enough high visibility jackets.
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Dec 10, 2016 00:25
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Leia Organa Re-Election Campaign Strategy List: - Lean on Skywalker connection - Distance self from "Darth" Skywalker connection - Play down husband's history of trafficking hard drugs - Blow up another Death Star?? Please God let the Hutts or something build some kind of Death Star analogue, we're tanking in the polls |
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Dec 10, 2016 00:33
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Yes, my father participated in one or several genocides - I lose count. But my brother stopped him, and my mother was basically incidental in all this, so on an average count, I'd say we're batting pretty even. And what about my uncle [shuffles cue cards] ... Owen Lars? You never hear about him, but the truth is, the Skywalker-Organa family comes from blue collar, salt of the earth roots - *aide whispers urgently in ear* - um, I mean, I have had no personal interaction with the slave trader Owen Lars and believe he was primarily a friend of my father's. Thank you, no further questions. |
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Dec 10, 2016 00:37
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Android Blues posted:Yes, my father participated in one or several genocides - I lose count. But my brother stopped him, and my mother was basically incidental in all this, so on an average count, I'd say we're batting pretty even. And what about my uncle [shuffles cue cards] ... Owen Lars? You never hear about him, but the truth is, the Skywalker-Organa family comes from blue collar, salt of the earth roots - *aide whispers urgently in ear* - um, I mean, I have had no personal interaction with the slave trader Owen Lars and believe he was primarily a friend of my father's. Thank you, no further questions. |
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Dec 10, 2016 00:51
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Android Blues posted:Yes, my father participated in one or several genocides - I lose count. But my brother stopped him, and my mother was basically incidental in all this, so on an average count, I'd say we're batting pretty even. And what about my uncle [shuffles cue cards] ... Owen Lars? You never hear about him, but the truth is, the Skywalker-Organa family comes from blue collar, salt of the earth roots - *aide whispers urgently in ear* - um, I mean, I have had no personal interaction with the slave trader Owen Lars and believe he was primarily a friend of my father's. Thank you, no further questions. |
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Dec 10, 2016 00:58
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[int. coruscant press conference] Leia Organa: "My husband may have a checkered past, but he's put that all behind him during the war against the Empire. He's a war hero and a statesman who brings a certain dignity to these proceedings in the interim government. You can hear it from him." Han Solo: "Thanks, thanks. Yeah, uh. Not a lot to do now that the Empire is defeated. Yeah, I still fly around a bit, but no, not smuggling or anything. Turns out, my lady here? She can actually write and pass laws before we get the whole Senate thing booted up again, so I figure I'm legit now. I got all my permits for moving spice or whatever squared away now I'm sure." Leia: [whispering, grabs Han's shoulder] "NO! There are no permits for that! There are still laws against smuggling!! You can't be smuggling drugs, are you crazy? How did you eve-" Han Solo: "Uhh, hmm, drat. Well." [awkwardly stares around room, blows air out of mouth, long pause] Han Solo: "I guess we need to clear out some inventory, so, if anybody needs a little pick me up, youknowwhatI'msayin*cough*spice*cough*, talk to my man Chewbacca, tall guy in the back. I gotta go." [rushes off stage] |
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Dec 10, 2016 01:06
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Luke Skywalker: "Too long have these tens of millions of slaves languished constructing hundred-kilometer battlestations in the harsh vacuum of space in hazardous conditions." *crowd cheers* Luke: "Under my new policy, these slaves will be redistributed based on income to households throughout the New Republic where they can do honest labor for good folks across this great interstellar nation." *crowd less ecstatic* |
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Dec 10, 2016 01:11
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joke_explainer posted:Luke Skywalker: "Too long have these tens of millions of slaves languished constructing hundred-kilometer battlestations in the harsh vacuum of space in hazardous conditions." |
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Dec 10, 2016 01:14
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joke_explainer posted:Luke Skywalker: "Too long have these tens of millions of slaves languished constructing hundred-kilometer battlestations in the harsh vacuum of space in hazardous conditions." |
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Dec 10, 2016 15:12
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Leia: "wow the ewoks are so beautiful, they are truly one with mother Endor 3" *dons ceremonial ewok headdress* Lando: "wow, a little condescending? have you seen their logging operations, their slash and burn agriculture, or the way they destroy the understory to encourage game to reproduce so that they get better hunts?" |
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Dec 10, 2016 15:16
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