EponymousMrYar posted:

I am a master writer

ingwit posted:

Johnny Fiveaces powered down the magnabike with a not quite unhearble hum and checked his chronometer. “drat.” he hissed threw his clinched teeth which were surrounded by the stubble of five days where in he had not shaven himself at all. It was almost chromodawn at Clashpoint. Alreddy the sun was sitting Walliston’s Hill ah blaze like so much molten meddle or a coin, gyreating in the air, tossed there by the uncaring hand of an imaginary god that doesn’t exist, borne from the interior minds of the hobbled masses. The sky was the color of a television tuned to a dead channel that was orange. drat, he, Johnny, thought. We thought we were opening a new beginning with our mad dreams of time travail but ironically the only time now is the time of which we’re out of. It’s almost humorous. Yeah, I could almost laugh, if I hadn’t cried that part of me away when my parents were maccasared by Dr. Malaprop and the government sanctioned murderers of “CAPITAL”.

He lit a Nicosheen brand swaggerette and took a dip drag, sinking farther into his inferior horologue. He thought of Nina and her mellifluous buttocks that he used to love to bang. Even now his nano enhanced hearing could almost hear her vagina lips quivering with moisture and also pleasure, like a slice of synth-ham being tongued by one of Malaprop’s slamhounds. When he got back to City5, he was going to do some sex, no doubt about that. “That’s right doll” he said to nobody and the wind. They were going to do it hard. He smiled, blowing smoke from his nostrils. They were going to do it cyber hard.

CJacobs posted:

Quoting this again to say that I have recut and re-uploaded the cut commentary version of the first episode. It now has much less talking over the characters. In later episodes of the LP (and episodes of Alan Wake) this will not be as much of a problem because it's mostly Alan by himself, but the game's introduction and other parts where you're just walkin' around Bright Falls are pretty full of dialogue for us to jabber over. So I have rectified the issue by cutting/changing some of the commentary to not be in the way of the game anymore.

White Coke posted:

WACGWIANAOLJLAJacobs. It all makes sense now.

CJacobs posted:

https://twitter.com/CJacobsSA/status/806549284258775043

KieranWalker posted:

And maybe lay off the tweed.

CJacobs posted:

I stepped right over his corpse.

CJacobs posted:

Something Awful poster Fish Noise, who I do enjoy so much: you may be happy to know that The Binding of Isaac finally officially supports modding with lua and stuff. That means that I can finally make that fan art you drew back in the Dead Space 3 thread a reality!

JT Jag posted:

Subliminal messages in an LP? That's just absurd

Now if you excuse me I have some dragon dildos to warm up

CJacobs posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwJvDBs_Jz0

I played through the entirety of Resident Evil 7 tonight in one sitting! It was super duper fun! If you don't plan on buying the game or don't mind spoilers, you should watch it, I had a great time and the chat was great too. Maybe don't watch it in one sitting because it's 8 hours long.

CJacobs posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqLpCij2JcE

(It's a reference to this stream I did today that went fantastically by the way)

value-brand cereal posted:

http://cjacobs.wikia.com/wiki/Cjacobs_Wiki

3,000 canines, huh?

The Unlife Aquatic posted:

Yeah, Alan Wake is a real labor of love. It shows in a million little ways, and they all come together to make a narrative that feels really comfortable with itself. I think my favorite little moment so far was Barry unloading on Alan. In general Barry is a character who could have really been awful, there's a real balance in his execution you don't often see in video games.

Mr. Highway posted:

Barry is the best. I'd love a spin-off with Barry fighting the darkness, where he doesn't actually fight because the darkness stumbles like a stooge to it's own demise every time.

CJacobs posted:

When the loving letters fade, it's like moving in slow motion.

Blind Sally posted:

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

I recognize almost everyone, but who's the long-haired lover from Liverpool next to Thermy?

CJacobs posted:

I'm playing Remedy's next narrative shooty adventure game, Quantum Break, completely blind! Come watch me make jokes about Aiden Gillen throwing people off of aircrafts and taking off big guys' masks!