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TK8325 posted:A Boyfriend for Christmas TK8325 posted:A Bride for Christmas
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Dec 11, 2016 06:09
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i am the bird posted:There was once a thread for goons to submit their own terrible Christmas songs and it was always hilarious. Every winter I think of Ho Ho Ho It's Christmastime and can't breathe because of how relentlessly stupid and funny it is. This is amazing
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Dec 11, 2016 06:18
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A Christmas album for the angsty twelve year old in all of us.
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Dec 11, 2016 08:16
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TK8325 posted:Yes! It's that time of year where Hallmark, UP, INSP and other such channels bust out the Good Ol' Fashioned Christmas©™ movies! Let's take a look at some of them: Ugh, my mom loves this schlock. I can guarantee that she'll record so many on the DVR that she'll be catching up on them in like July.
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Dec 11, 2016 08:17
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about terrible movies
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Just reminding everyone that Bad Religion did a Christmas album: https://youtu.be/PLCxbXfyXCo
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Dec 11, 2016 08:47
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No, no, guys the best Christmas movie is this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_U4cthFCLs
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Dec 11, 2016 15:01
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TK8325 posted:Yes! It's that time of year where Hallmark, UP, INSP and other such channels bust out the Good Ol' Fashioned Christmas©™ movies! Let's take a look at some of them: Urgh. Do you know there's a whole channel dedicated soley to these things? Nothing but endless Hallmark style mawkish Christmas movies, 24/7  I know they're just there for background noise, and it's formulaic, but there's something unitentionally sinister with how clinical the stories are, and the weirdly sterile world they live in. Tiggum posted:If she's been engaged three times, doesn't that suggest that she already thought she'd found "the one" at least three times? Or is her problem that she basically just agrees to marry anyone who asks? Those sorts of one where the main character is engaged to a dick fiance is kind of amusing, if only for the ways the stories have to portray him as a turbo Hitler by the end; the reasons running the gamut of extremes from having an affair, to just "not liking christmas".
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Dec 11, 2016 15:36
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My favorite christmas movie is Jack Frost.
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Dec 11, 2016 18:22
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Jack Frost is great. The MST3K'd version, that is. My favorite Christmas movie is Prancer because of the scene near the beginning when the little girl asks her dad if they're going to starve and he starts going on an angry rant about how they won't because they've got apples! "Apple sauce, apple cider, apple pie, stewed apples, baked apples, dried apples, apple butter!"
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Dec 11, 2016 21:42
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empty sea posted:Jack Frost is great. The MST3K'd version, that is.
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Dec 12, 2016 02:42
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I just thought you guys should know that there's a PG-rated movie on Netflix about called The Spirit of Christmas about a woman who falls in love with a ghost. It is, near as I can tell, intended for adults. Also I've had Ho Ho Ho It's Christmas Time in my head all day and a tree fell on my garage earlier and crushed it and I'm terrified a tree is going to fall on my house and kill me and my last thought will be Ho Ho Ho It's Christmas Time.
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Dec 12, 2016 05:43
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girl pants posted:I just thought you guys should know that there's a PG-rated movie on Netflix about called The Spirit of Christmas about a woman who falls in love with a ghost. It is, near as I can tell, intended for adults. At least you can rest assured that you will still have a chance to find love as a Christmas ghost after you die.
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Dec 12, 2016 07:33
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girl pants posted:I just thought you guys should know that there's a PG-rated movie on Netflix about called The Spirit of Christmas about a woman who falls in love with a ghost. It is, near as I can tell, intended for adults. Up on the Rooftop (Claus & Company #1) by Kristine Grayson, aka. Kristine Kathryn Rusch quote:Julka is part of Santa's Advance team, but she's spending her days inspecting rooftop entrances for the Big Night. And she's traveling with an annoying elf who just happens to be on double secret forever probation. She hates her job. She wants excitement. She wants to explore the Greater World. She wants romance. Disgraced investment banker, Marshall, doesn't have a job. Not any more. He spends his days trying to ingratiate himself with neighbors who believe he's personally responsible for the Great Recession, even though he isn't. Then he sees a pretty woman dressed like an elf standing on a rooftop. He has no idea that entrancing vision will change his life-forever. Part of the Kristine Grayson Santa Series.
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Dec 12, 2016 11:45
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The only Christmas song you need: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-oVPVsCqs4 A film staple in our house at Yuletime: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8qwZcycfoI
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Dec 12, 2016 12:25
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Tiggum posted:Up on the Rooftop (Claus & Company #1) by Kristine Grayson, aka. Kristine Kathryn Rusch I'm so angry that this is a real thing and I'm going to find it and read every word of it.
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Dec 12, 2016 15:02
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Tiggum posted:Up on the Rooftop (Claus & Company #1) by Kristine Grayson, aka. Kristine Kathryn Rusch girl pants posted:I'm so angry that this is a real thing and I'm going to find it and read every word of it. This is probably the hangover talking here, but im strangely intrigued.
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Dec 12, 2016 15:29
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Six-Of-Hearts posted:This is probably the hangover talking here, but im strangely intrigued. I bought it. I'll report back when I'm finished with it. It's like 95 pages long and so far the author has spent a few paragraphs telling us how the guy is totally filthy rich from being an investment banker but the Great Recession was TOTALLY NOT HIS FAULT YOU GUYS HE'S A GOOD GUY vvv there's a pyf terrible book thread girl pants has a new favorite as of 19:05 on Dec 12, 2016 |
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Dec 12, 2016 18:13
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girl pants posted:I bought it. I'll report back when I'm finished with it. It's like 95 pages long and so far the author has spent a few paragraphs telling us how the guy is totally filthy rich from being an investment banker but the Great Recession was TOTALLY NOT HIS FAULT YOU GUYS HE'S A GOOD GUY Is there a 'cheesy/terrible Christmas book' thread in the book forum yet?
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Dec 12, 2016 18:56
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I put a dollar in the Salvation Army bell ringer man's bucket and he said 'looks like snow' and I said 'God I hope not' and he frowned disapprovingly at me. Snow is actually bad, dummy. In fact it makes an already difficult and travel-heavy holiday worse!
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Dec 12, 2016 20:33
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Saint Freak posted:I put a dollar in the Salvation Army bell ringer man's bucket and he said 'looks like snow' and I said 'God I hope not' and he frowned disapprovingly at me. Snow is actually bad, dummy. In fact it makes an already difficult and travel-heavy holiday worse! Is Salvation Army still supporting anti-LGBT stuff? They insisted they're not as of last Christmas, but they noticeably removed some links to conversion therapy from their website when called out in 2013.
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Dec 12, 2016 21:26
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I finished the book. It is very stupid, do not read it. Honestly, the whole "Santa is real!!!" thing combined with repeated descriptions of how sexy the female protagonist is just sort of made me feel... deeply creeped out. And also the male protagonist first assumes the woman is twelve, then immediately starts thinking she's incredibly sexy once he realizes she isn't.  And it's not even a Christmas book because it's set the night before Halloween!
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Dec 13, 2016 02:12
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chitoryu12 posted:Is Salvation Army still supporting anti-LGBT stuff? They insisted they're not as of last Christmas, but they noticeably removed some links to conversion therapy from their website when called out in 2013. In Australia they've said they're against an anti-LGBTI bullying program run by the government called Safe Schools, so gently caress 'em.
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Dec 13, 2016 02:26
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girl pants posted:I just thought you guys should know that there's a PG-rated movie on Netflix about called The Spirit of Christmas about a woman who falls in love with a ghost. It is, near as I can tell, intended for adults. I'm listening to the 6 minutes chorus version. My brain is melting and I love it. Ooh, JennyInStereo's part just started!
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Dec 13, 2016 03:33
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How about a nice classical song about wintertime date rape.
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Dec 13, 2016 05:44
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"Actually in the 40s a woman would be expected to act coy in order to be seen as properly ladylike but it's very clear that she's actually totally on board with staying the night" "Perhaps, but that reasoning has historically been used to justify a lot of date rape both at the time and since then." There. Can we skip the long versions of these posts now?
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Dec 13, 2016 11:55
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"Snow It won't be long before we'll all be there with snow Snow I want to wash my hands, my face and hair with snow Snow I long to clear a path and lift a spade of snow Snow Oh, to see a great big man entirely made of snow" drat this song! 
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Dec 18, 2016 05:33
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The worst part of Christmas is every ad on TV trying to be "festive".
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Dec 18, 2016 06:18
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https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/early-draft-of-hallmark-movie-screenplay-christmas-for-christmas
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Dec 20, 2016 07:43
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SIIIIIIMPLY HAAAAAVING A WONDERFUL CHRISTMASTIME
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Dec 20, 2016 08:12
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I ended up catching the end of Rapsittie Street Kids: Believe in Santa on a Cytube stream and hoo boy this is something. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4e-wuyjgDPQ This isn't a parody or a joke movie. This is a legit 2002 holiday special aired on the WB for something like a month straight. It was so awful that as soon as the run was finished, the network just pretended it didn't exist and never aired it again. "Luckily", someone happened to have or find a copy and uploaded it to YouTube last year.
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Dec 20, 2016 14:27
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chitoryu12 posted:I ended up catching the end of Rapsittie Street Kids: Believe in Santa on a Cytube stream and hoo boy this is something. This is honestly one of my favorite xmas things.
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Dec 21, 2016 04:23
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This was my favorite holiday special as a kid. I had bad taste.
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Dec 21, 2016 05:12
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1. Black Friday is irredeemably disgusting. I have unfollowed and occasionally unfriended people on Facebook when they defend it (for me, this is pretty sassy.) It is not a tradition. You're just trash. I may be biased; I worked at Old Navy on Black Friday one year and was almost punched in the face (as in, she swung and missed) because we ran out of some ugly loving jeggings that were on super sale. Not to mention the myriad ways that retail/service employees are abused by customers and their employers for the sake of Black Friday profit...the lovely image it gives the rest of the world about Americans (not that THAT matters anymore)...the injuries! The deaths! The stupidity! The materialism! gently caress anyone who willingly participates in this garbage. 2. Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time. Cannot deal. 3. "Last Christmas" by Wham! Noooo. 4. People getting mad when the decorations they see don't apply exact to their personal beliefs and preferences. 4a. Boy, I really hate religious decorations! 4b. The holidays apparently make me a hypocrite. 5. Being forced to teach my students about holidays, specifically told to include the history of the holidays, and then being hamstrung by the Chinese government because I can't talk about religion. DO YOU WANT HISTORY OR DON'T YOU 6. EGG NOG SUCKS rear end 7. NO, I DON'T WANT TO CALL MY CREEPY UNCLE. I KNOW IT'S CHRISTMAS, MOM, BUT HE'S STILL A CREEP ON CHRISTMAS. 8. Blue string lights give me a loving headache. gah
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Dec 21, 2016 06:44
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Fleta Mcgurn posted:1. Black Friday is irredeemably disgusting. I have unfollowed and occasionally unfriended people on Facebook when they defend it (for me, this is pretty sassy.) It is not a tradition. You're just trash. I may be biased; I worked at Old Navy on Black Friday one year and was almost punched in the face (as in, she swung and missed) because we ran out of some ugly loving jeggings that were on super sale. Not to mention the myriad ways that retail/service employees are abused by customers and their employers for the sake of Black Friday profit...the lovely image it gives the rest of the world about Americans (not that THAT matters anymore)...the injuries! The deaths! The stupidity! The materialism! gently caress anyone who willingly participates in this garbage. Holidays in general blow, last black friday though was awful. I've been working a second job in retail so I can afford medical  and the department lead was just on my rear end the whole day berating me in front of the customers for not doing poo poo like stocking every shelf perfectly despite a tide of non-stop customers. Which in turn slowed me down and got me yelled at even more, because it's my fault he was stopping me every five minutes you see.Anyway my least favorite chistmas song is Blue Christmas if sung by anyone other than elvis. I will forever hate the next person to play the god awful porky pig version. No song needs to feel like it's an hour long.
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Dec 21, 2016 06:54
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chitoryu12 posted:I ended up catching the end of Rapsittie Street Kids: Believe in Santa on a Cytube stream and hoo boy this is something. What the absolute gently caress is this
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Dec 21, 2016 07:08
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Nuebot posted:Holidays in general blow, last black friday though was awful. I've been working a second job in retail so I can afford medical Old Navy was open for 48 hours straight or something that year and the parody of "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" by Aerosmith, sung by George Takei, played every five minutes. Besides lady Punchface, I saw people bringing INFANTS into the store between the hours of 4 and 5 AM (and plenty of used diapers left scattered around for us like mustardy treasure), three or four screaming fights over the last lovely baby onesie or something else useless, and a veritable platoon of Russian women buying every single piece of clothing from the clearance section (which they brought back for a price adjustment THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS, getting back roughly $350 each and completely shutting the store down for over an hour while we frantically tried to deal with that while our managers checked out normal shoppers on the handheld POS system), groups of screeching sorostitutes laying waste to the denim walls, twelve people throwing full-body fits because we didn't offer giftwrap, eleven people changing in the middle of the sales floor, ten dads a-smackin', nine moms a-threatenin', eight people complaining that they thought we were a Target (what?), seven broken fixtures, six-year-olds getting lost, FIVE A.M. RUSSSSSSHHHH, four drug deals, three adult tantrums, two employees drunk, and a partridge in Performance Fleece. I hate Old Navy! (and I may have fudged some of those numbers, but not the incidents)
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Dec 21, 2016 10:44
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Draconi Ann posted:"Snow https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silent_Snow,_Secret_Snow
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Dec 21, 2016 12:19
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Fleta Mcgurn posted:1. Black Friday is irredeemably disgusting. I have unfollowed and occasionally unfriended people on Facebook when they defend it (for me, this is pretty sassy.) It is not a tradition. You're just trash. I may be biased; I worked at Old Navy on Black Friday one year and was almost punched in the face (as in, she swung and missed) because we ran out of some ugly loving jeggings that were on super sale. Not to mention the myriad ways that retail/service employees are abused by customers and their employers for the sake of Black Friday profit...the lovely image it gives the rest of the world about Americans (not that THAT matters anymore)...the injuries! The deaths! The stupidity! The materialism! gently caress anyone who willingly participates in this garbage. It was introduced in Britain a couple years back even though we obviously don't have Thanksgiving.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3EoNsGHZD0&t=3105s
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Dec 21, 2016 13:36
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bitterandtwisted posted:It was introduced in Britain a couple years back even though we obviously don't have Thanksgiving. Oh, crumb. How does that stack with Boxing Day?
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Dec 21, 2016 16:16
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Fleta Mcgurn posted:Oh, crumb. How does that stack with Boxing Day? Still the biggest sale day. Been a few years since I worked in retail, only did Boxing Day once and that was for a book shop, so not too bad. Only funny thing was an old, well spoken, upper-middleclass guy trying to return a book without a receipt that was obviously bought long ago because it was the hardback edition and only the paperback was still in print. He got real indignant when we wouldn't take it. We were opposite a Next (clothing shop chain) however, and when I turned up for work there was already a queue of people going all the way down the high street, patiently waiting for it to open. At 7.30 in the morning. In the dark. In subzero temperatures. To buy boring clothes. It's not crazy like Black Friday, but way lamer. You should be sleeping off a hangover like Baby Jesus would want. It's also depressing. You're hounded with relentless Christmas cheer for months by every source of advertising and then there's an almost audible sound of an axe coming down and Christmas is instantly over and every shopfront and TV ad is covered in red and white Sale, Sale, Sale posters.
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Dec 21, 2016 16:49
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