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It’s about that time again. Another Final Fantasy game has released. You know what this means: it’s time for everyone to endure it. Buckle your seatbelts.  Against all rules of common sense and the recommendations of several certified mental health professionals, some of us have reunited to slog through whatever nonsense this game has to offer. Everyone here knows Kuvo. Some of you may remember topiKal for better or worse. Joining us occasionally will be bandunk and probably others at times (who knows). Maybe we’ll bring in some more guests as long as they don’t get carsick.   YOUTUBE PLAYLIST FOR EMMY CONSIDERATIONEpisode 1: The Explaining Game Episode 2: Sponsored by Coleman Episode 3: "Got It" Episode 4: Dress Up Episode 5: Noctis After Dark Episode 6: Fishing for the Plot Episode 7: Legally Dead Episode 8: Dropping On In Episode 9: HardCor Episode 10: Catch-Up and Hot Sauce Episode 11: Schedule 1 Frogs Episode 12: Catcher-22 Episode 13: The Fast and the Furious: Chocobo Drift Episode 14: Noctis' Stupid loving Carnival Episode 15: Noctis' Stupid loving Fireworks Episode 16: How 'Bout the Decals Episode 17: Kevin - "Just Name it Something About How Bad I am at this Game (very)" Episode 18: This is Why I'm Single Episode 19: Meeting the Locals Episode 20: Florida Man Episode 21: Reversal of Fortune Episode 22: Typical Mexico Episode 23: Cave Banditos Episode 24: Jaywalking is a Victimless Crime Episode 25: Come with me to the Car Park Episode 26: Schedule 2 Frogs Episode 27: Sorry Episode 28: Chocobo Rough Riders Episode 29: Catoblepas Episode 30: You Better Believe It Episode 31: Pretty Boy Episode 32: Bandersnatch Works from Home Episode 33: Tremendous Bridge Episode 34: Car Gets Uglier Episode 35: Prompto's Peak Episode 36: Still Got It Episode 36: Mythril Hunt Episode 37: Remembering Your First Time Episode 38: Sweet Jumps Episode 39: Bandunk Takes the Wheel Episode 40: More Metals than Eisenhower Episode 41: pets.com Episode 42: Nootle Kobotle Episode 43: So you want to be an assassin? Episode 44: Tragic Beauty Episode 45: Prince of the Pond Episode 46: Magic Flask Episode 47: I could eat a whore Episode 48: What Happened Episode 49: Eligible Bachelor Episode 50: Chicky Nuggs Episode 51: Bonus Gruel Episode 52: Incomprehensible Episode 53: Assuage Episode 54: Magic Time Dog vs. The Icy Plot Goddess Episode 55: Y'all're Episode 56: Imperial Data Center Episode 57: Total Recap Episode 58: Kuvo takes a poo poo April Fools: Prison. Break. Episode 59: Padding it Out Episode 60: Snootchie Bootchies Episode 61: Fire and Ice: The Thermomix Episode 62: Shenmue Ep 20 Episode 63: Out Cold Episode 64: Magitek Gear Stupid Episode 65: Arctic Blunder Episode 66: Caring Prompto Units Episode 67: Grape Ape Episode 68: Hard and Fast Episode 69: 21,900 pounds Episode 70: Twenty Four Thousand Swords Episode 71: Freedom  Final Fantasy XV is the latest installment of the famous and terrible series of storyfight games. For the first time we are playing it right after the initial release. The game just came out worldwide on November 29, 2016 (that’s like last week!). Just like cloud computing and your favorite Pokemon, the series is evolving into something more and more confusing and unrecognizable. Every FF in recent years has become increasingly action-based, culminating in this which basically seems to be an open-world Action RPG more than a turn-based affair. Sure, why not? Can’t fight the future.  A few guidelines for our Let’s Plays:
 Noctis, the crown prince of Lucis, is heading out on the highway with his good friends. They just can’t wait to get to Altissia so he can marry his bangin’ hot lady and make some cool prince-babies who will also have sweet cars. Let’s just reiterate that for unexplained reasons, the prince is driving through the desert and fighting wild animals with only three buddies and what seems to be a pretty unreliable car. Also I guess his family isn’t coming to the wedding (???). We’ll discuss this more as we figure out what the heck is even happening with this plot. While on our way to the wedding, the Empire attacked our country and killed King Dad (who btw had Palpatine-style lightning hands). Ever since then we've all been declared legally dead and the Empire has been after us. We met up with Gladiolus' sister Iris to have a fun date, fought Titan, and went to a carnival. All in all, it's been a great trip so far.  (no we did not find the full names of these characters on Wikipedia) Noctis Lucis Caelum Arbitrary Skill: Fishing Crown Prince of Lucis. Seems to be fairly level-headed aside from having little to no regard for his own personal safety or royal title. Gladiolus Amicitia Arbitrary Skill: Survival Bodyguard for Noctis. Has a weirdly deep voice and tends to give advice. As of yet he has almost no actual personality. Ignis Scientia Arbitrary Skill: Cooking That last name, are you serious? Some kind of military tactician. Often "invents" recipes based on activities that have absolutely no relation to cooking, which is a pretty good indicator he's actually just feeding us sand with added spices. Prompto Argentum Arbitrary Skill: Photography Looks like Cloud Strife. Extremely stupid and annoying person who may die in a dramatic fashion to move the plot forward, like Spike Jonze’s character in Three Kings. Sorry if you’ve never seen Three Kings. Lunafreya Nox Fleuret The Princess of Tenebrae, she's chillin' at the castle so Noctis can head on over and take her hand in marriage. Must be pretty patient considering he's spending an awful lot of time dicking around in the desert. Like most classy ladies, she has a British accent. Also has a pet homing dog whose name we don't know yet but will probably be the subject of many dog reaction shots in the future. Update: dog's name is Umbra Umbra The official royal dog, he basically carries messages between Lunafreya and Noctis. "Got it." Iris Amicitia Gladiolus's sister who is aiding and abetting us. She seems more intellectually competent than our entire team combined, which begs the question of why we're even controlling these other guys. Probably has a crush on Noctis, but who cares. Cid Sophiar & Cindy Aurum Grandfather-granddaughter team who run a gas station. Cindy holds the current record for most ear-shatteringly awful fake accent since Keanu Reeves in Bram Stoker's Dracula, so that’s nice. Like most gas station attendants, they often ask people go into the desert and murder wildlife. Update: looks like Cid was a bodyguard for Noctis' dad when he was younger or something. He's pretty salty about it. Ardyn Izunia Some dude who was at the beach. Overly cryptic and antagonistic. No clue who he is yet, but we'll probably be fighting him to the death somewhere in the last five hours of the game. Since then we found out his name is Ardyn and he is the Imperial Chancellor. Seems like that would be a fairly involved job, but apparently not because he finds enough time to show up periodically, screw with us, and impound our car despite our squeaky-clean driving records. Dino Ghiranze A blackmailing reporter who hangs out by the beach. He has a blatantly fake Italian/New Yawhk accent that is almost as bad as Cindy's. Seems like the type of guy who knows how to wolf-whistle really loud. Sword Guy Sells swords outside the gas station, as you do. His products are high quality. topiKal fucked around with this message at 18:59 on Jul 23, 2018 |
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Dec 10, 2016 00:18
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| # ? Apr 19, 2024 12:51 |
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https://i.imgur.com/NfND8Jp.mp4
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Dec 10, 2016 00:18
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I look forward for the next 5 months of this, until it suddenly changes to... I dunno, OwlBoy on April 1st? Then I'll look forward to that too.
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Dec 10, 2016 00:22
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Dec 10, 2016 00:22
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Nice this is an extremely terrible idea, should I start writing fanfiction for you to read because I have some wonderful head canons about how Prompto has IBS.
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Dec 10, 2016 00:23
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The Pushing 30s newest LP: brought to you by Nissin Cup Noodles®. We know you love any kind of meat, and nothing goes great with Nissin Cup Noodles® like any kind of meat.
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Dec 10, 2016 00:24
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I MADE THAT GIF you gently caress 
I810BUX fucked around with this message at 00:27 on Dec 10, 2016 |
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Dec 10, 2016 00:25
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As someone who has made multiple American cross-country trips by car, I can safely say that this game is not accurate at all as it contains no state troopers or massive truck stops with a Dairy Queen that you have to eat at because it's the only restaurant open for 60 miles.
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Dec 10, 2016 00:27
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You crazy motherfuckers. Did Tales of Vesperia teach you nothing? Also I can't believe bandunk is loving alive. I didn't even recognize his voice at first.
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Dec 10, 2016 00:32
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2016 wasn't such a bad year after all I guess. Thanks for the Festivus miracle guys.
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Dec 10, 2016 00:36
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Oh gently caress here we go, I was wondering when someone was going to inflict this on themselves. Long road ahead boys, and I hope whichever among you is driving brought something other than beer!
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Dec 10, 2016 00:48
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bandunk already sounds like this game is killing him
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Dec 10, 2016 01:15
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Qwarq posted:You crazy motherfuckers. Did Tales of Vesperia teach you nothing? One doesn't recognize bandunk's voice per se. One just recognizes bandunk's volume.
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Dec 10, 2016 01:28
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Kuvo I think you forgot when April 1st is.
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Dec 10, 2016 01:29
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Jesus Christ. Literally yesterday someone asked me if you guys were gonna stream or LP this game and I said no way, they'd never LP this weird-rear end game.
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Dec 10, 2016 01:29
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Oh man, hearing you three together again is the best drat christmas present ever. I missed bandunks sense of humour. Even if this turns out to be a false flag LP I am all for it haha. Thanks guys.
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Dec 10, 2016 01:47
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Your battle buddy seems almost as useless as the gun guy from Fable II.
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Dec 10, 2016 02:00
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If there ever was a Tipping 40s reunion it would be playing this game nonstop for 72 hours straight. Thank you for mostly making this come true.
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Dec 10, 2016 02:12
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The band's back together 
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Dec 10, 2016 02:17
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Qwarq posted:You crazy motherfuckers. Did Tales of Vesperia teach you nothing? I thought it was Pat with a cold for the first half. Then he started screaming about bocci ball...
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Dec 10, 2016 02:31
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Appearntly a ton of stuff was cut from this game's plot. And another part was turned into a movie.
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Dec 10, 2016 02:34
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I have to admit I thought bandunk sounded like Minifoo at first as well. All I know is this game looks good as a boyband road trip sim but bad as an action game just from seeing my brother play it. For some reason Shemnue came to mind but my mind wanders into dark places sometimes.
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Dec 10, 2016 02:46
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Bandunk got a story patch that caused him to sound different, called working in tech while also having a kid so that you have no life energy anymore.
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Dec 10, 2016 02:55
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I have zero interest in this game, but I'm contractually obligated to see it. Thanks for playing it so I don't have to!
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Dec 10, 2016 03:01
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Prompto seems like the name of a low-rent magician.
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Dec 10, 2016 03:23
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oh yes oh god yes form the head FORM THE HEAD unghhhh...
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Name the car polio rolio I've contributed now.
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Dec 10, 2016 03:25
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I can't believe this, is this real life? I guess I'll put off watching Jojo for another 30 min
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Dec 10, 2016 03:36
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Cory in the Blouse posted:I can't believe this, is this real life? I think its just fantasy. Now I'm really hoping beyond hope that they break out some Bohemian Rhapsody.
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Dec 10, 2016 04:07
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This was a nice surprise for sure! My condolences though, the combat in this game just looks absolutely awful... Did it feel awful as well?
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Dec 10, 2016 04:16
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DO IT TO IT posted:This was a nice surprise for sure! My condolences though, the combat in this game just looks absolutely awful... Did it feel awful as well?
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Dec 10, 2016 04:21
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If you guys haven't figured it out yet, switch the camera option to "far" or else you won't be able to see poo poo in combat
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Dec 10, 2016 04:26
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slev posted:If you guys haven't figured it out yet, switch the camera option to "far" or else you won't be able to see poo poo in combat  Maybe I'm old-fashioned (or Bad at Video Games), but honestly I'd rather have a turn-based combat system like in FFX than this really awkward action RPG poo poo with a tacked-on Wait mode.
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Dec 10, 2016 04:32
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I like the combat in this game but so much poo poo is often going on at once that the whole "strategy" thing can be kind of hard to pull off.
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Dec 10, 2016 04:32
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Oh boy, and I was running out of LPs to watch
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Dec 10, 2016 04:34
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gently caress THIS GAME WHERE'S XENOBLADE
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Dec 10, 2016 04:45
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This game is good. However, watching you bumble through it sounds better.
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Dec 10, 2016 05:41
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ZenVulgarity posted:gently caress THIS GAME WHERE'S XENOBLADE This is it. This is Xenoblade right here.
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Dec 10, 2016 05:47
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I couldn't the CA All Day podcast. Could someone post a link?
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Dec 10, 2016 06:57
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Hell yes, boy band adventures
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Dec 10, 2016 07:40
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I've started playing this myself and from what little experience I have let me just say that you are loving insane. But hey what else is new
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Dec 10, 2016 07:59
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