Folstag ate Age of Mythology:EE and hurled Titan Difficulty into the river!

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Folstag ate Age of Mythology:EE and hurled Titan Difficulty into the river!

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

Oooh, AoM!

And yes, gently caress Thebes and everyone associated with those Medizers.

# ¿ Dec 29, 2016 13:34

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# ¿ May 2, 2024 15:21

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

Melth posted:

Just noticed your picture is Alexander the Pretty Good.

The only person cooler than Alexander is Ptolemy

# ¿ Dec 29, 2016 22:26

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

Melth posted:

To lazily copy/paste from my history/nature photos blog (thesupremeexcellence.tumblr.com) since I was just talking about this guy;

Alexander the Better

There was this Macedonian king named Alexander who was great, and it�s not the one you�re thinking of. Alexander the Pretty Good mostly just overran the failingest empire in world history using the unstoppable army and alliance with other excellent armies which his father had built out of nothing. Oh and named twenty or thirty cities after his only pretty good self.

The Persian Empire wasn't failing into a general period of decadence under Darius (contra Arrian) before the novel manner of Alexander's invasion, rather Alexander fought a war of a type not seen before by the Achaemenids - a war of total conquest rather than internal rebellion or minor border incursion. The very structures which produced the strength of the empire, its diversity and regional power bases all focused in on one king were revealed by Alexander (who played the political and military game brilliantly up to the conquest of Babylon) to also be weak to a successful military leader - much as Cyrus the Younger had almost proven before his loss at Cunaxa in 401. See Briant's Histoire de l'Empire Perse. De Cyrus � Alexandre (1996) for more.
(My thesis will likely be on this exact period, and I'll stop distracting from the LP now)

# ¿ Dec 30, 2016 01:20

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

anilEhilated posted:

Honestly, the only gods I can think of that weren't complete dicks were Hades, Hephaestus and maybe Athena (whom I only really recall messing with Arachne but she really had it coming).

Athena is definitely a dick. Just look at her loving with Odysseus in Book 13 of the Odyssey, simply because she can.

# ¿ Jan 3, 2017 23:41

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

HannibalBarca posted:

Migdol Units

Massed chariot archers

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2017 19:37

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

As for Cyzicus appearing, yeah, it wasn't founded by Milesian settlers until the 7th century BC. King Cyzicus appears in the Argonautica as the King of the Doliones, but none of that's in the Homeric epics.

# ¿ Jan 18, 2017 13:20

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

CommissarMega posted:

To be fair those were a bunch of noble slobs looking to stick their dicks in his wife, not battle-hardened Trojans, and IIRC Odysseus was getting help from his son.

Having Athena on his side didn't hurt either (as always, see the foot race in Book XXIII of the Iliad, complete with comedy poo moment!) .

Odysseus doesn't do badly in the Iliad's murderbowl stakes either - the fourth deadliest Greek hero after Diomedes, Patroklos and Achilles.

# ¿ Jan 19, 2017 12:58

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

Melth posted:

I was just rereading some of the Iliad (which I hate, by the way, but nevermind that right now)

Whoa Whoa Whoa. Hold it right there. I can understand rating the Odyssey above the Iliad or the like, but hating it?!

# ¿ Jan 20, 2017 02:46

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

Simply Simon posted:

I only read a popular prose retelling of the Iliad so hopefully this is not something that got lost in translation, but my favourite moment of comparing hero stats like Homer's mashing loving action figures together going "Odysseus could totally beat Achilles if he had enough time to plan!" is when Menelaos first meets Odysseus and it's stated that Menelaos is bigger than Odysseus when they're standing up, but Odysseus is bigger when they're both sitting. That's so pointless, I love it!

From the Teichoscopia (i.e. viewing from the walls) in Book 3

Homer posted:

Then he saw Odysseus and asked: �Who is he, dear child? Tell me of that man shorter than Agamemnon, but broader in the chest and shoulders. He heaps his armour on the ground and ranges the ranks like the leader of the flock, the fleecy ram that roams among white ewes.�

�That�, replied Helen, daughter of Zeus, �is wily Odysseus, Laertes� son, reared in Ithaca that rocky isle, master of tricks and clever devices.�

�True, indeed, lady� added wise Antenor. �He has been here before with Menelaus, beloved of Ares, on an embassy regarding you. They were guests in my house, and I know their looks and stature and all their guile. When they stood among our assembled Trojans, Menelaus was the taller, but, seated, broad-shouldered Odysseus was more regal. And when they began to weave their web of cunning speech, Menelaus, it is true, spoke fluently and clearly, but briefly, since though the younger he was a man of few and concise words. But when wily Odysseus rose to speak, he stood with his gaze fixed on the ground, his staff gripped tight and motionless, as if he were a man of little experience. Yet when that great voice issued from his chest, with words like flakes of winter snow, no mortal man could rival him; and we were no longer fooled by his appearance.�

The Greek word is γεραρώτερος, "more majestic", the comparative of the adjective γεραρός from γέρας, the gifts/honour due to nobility - it is the taking by Agamemnon of Achilles' geras, Briseis, which kicks off the Iliad, since such gifts were the source of honour. Essentially, Priam believes that Odysseus is the more worthy of gifts and honour of the two.

# ¿ Jan 21, 2017 01:11

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

Melth posted:

Also the Homeric Greeks were TERRIBLE navigators. I mean in the stories Menelaus sets out from Turkey to Greece and winds up in Egypt. Other people end up west of Italy.

Now I think they exaggerate their incompetence in those stories, but the Greeks were really lousy sailors by Mediterranean standards for about a thousand years.

That's a rather unfair view of Greek navigational skills - though ancient ships could sail against the wind to an extent, everyone prepared to sail with the wind behind them.
Thus ending up in Egypt is not unreasonable given the prevailing winds of the Eastern Med - and why traders returning to Greece went along the Levantine coast before crossing back to the Aegean

Astroclassicist fucked around with this message at 18:12 on Feb 14, 2017

# ¿ Feb 14, 2017 18:06

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# ¿ May 2, 2024 15:21

Astroclassicist: Aug 21, 2015

HannibalBarca posted:

man I love the Egyptians. I'd play Isis every scrim I do with my friend if it didn't get stale for both of us.

Laser crocs :argh:

# ¿ Apr 12, 2017 15:12

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Folstag ate Age of Mythology:EE and hurled Titan Difficulty into the river!