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Pellisworth posted:I dunno if it's within the scope of this thread, but gay male culture in the US is pretty toxic and exclusionary. To throw out one example, gay men with more stereotypically effeminate mannerisms or dress get poo poo on a ton compared to str8-acting homobros. Right-o. Even gay men have to subscribe to sexist gender norms. I've seen plenty of it in Mexico and Texas. I can't count how many times my mom has asked me if my gay brother is the "man or woman" in the relationship.  But then there's gay males who will subject their peers to the same standards.
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Dec 28, 2016 06:24
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My gf and I discussed "mansplaining" just yesterday. We both agreed that some men are heavy-handed and paternal, but we couldn't agree on how much was learned or innate behavior. She said that women do plenty "splainin" themselves. (I agreed because she can be plenty professorial herself  )I don't like how trendy "mansplaining" has become. I agree that we live in a patriarchy and that men indulge in boorish behavior, but it's become an inherently anti-men argument. I mostly hear it from educated white women too, which may mean it is primarily an occupational problem.
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Dec 28, 2016 06:43
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It's a good 1970s article and a good way to talk about male privilege and gender roles. But it's not so great in tyool 2016 in the supposed "patriarchy's effects on men" thread. I'm gonna posit another question from the OP because this housework chat is lame. The Privilege Question: Do men benefit from Male Privilege? This was my first personal breakthrough Feminism, when I felt justified in believing in Feminism. Why did I have to feel justified? I grew up in a traditional Mexican social sphere. Women were subservient to men. Men led relationships. Women could be catcalled and macho men had as many girlfriends/wives as they could. I could go on for days about the ridiculousness of Hispanic gender norms. I started considering myself a Feminist in high school. It was mainly realizing the toxicity of Mexican misogyny coupled with personal skepticism which led me to really thinking about women's inequality. I soon realized that misogyny was not only ruining women's lives, but creating rear end in a top hat husks of just as many men. Men were depriving themselves of real, wholesome relationships with the women of their lives due to their sexism. Men were putting undue stress on themselves trying to lead every relationship they were in. They were keeping their feelings bottled up and becoming suicidal alcoholics. Again, the list could go on for days. By the time I reached college, Feminism was a bad word. Internet trolls harped about "Feminazis." Tumblr and mass media gave Feminism a bad name. My girlfriend at the time wasn't a Feminist herself. She had objections, related to how she perceived the most vocal members of the movement. I remember sharing my thoughts on the double nature of misogyny and she had her own breakthrough. She was already for women's liberation and empowerment, but she had never thought about sexism's effects on men. Being Mexican herself, and being raised to respect, care for, and to worry about men, it really hit a chord with her that men were killing women and themselves at the same time (literally and figuratively). Back to the question: I won't go into men benefiting from male privilege, but I could go on forever about the negatives. It's really sad how men don't see the sexist, loving, monkey on their back that they should chuck off.
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Dec 29, 2016 07:03
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