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Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Aardmania posted:

9 Chickweed Lane


Sadly, Brooke probably thinks he's being very feminist here.



Phantom Classic




Radio Patrol




Rip Kirby




Big Ben Bolt

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Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann


Piro, obviously. Still not evidence that either she or Piro stole the TV, but you wouldn't know that from the comment section.


The Sick of Rocket's poo poo Spider-Man


That look on Pete's face. I love this comic.


Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic




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Big Ben Bolt

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Evil Mastermind posted:

The thing about when Gilchrist puts old comic characters in his strip is that it's just nostalgia bait. All he's doing is saying "hey, remember this?" and that's it. It's just lovely "reference humor" in that the :airquote:joke is just the reference and that's it.

Also, a lot of the time it's Muppet Babies. And that's when he's saying, "Hey, remember when I worked on Muppet Babies? I worked on Muppet Babies. I was basically Jim Henson's protege. I was the foundation of the childhoods of all children of the 80's. Because of Muppet Babies. That I worked on."



Luann


If Slylock Fox were here, he'd never let her get away with that visibly steaming cup of coffee. :colbert:


The Amazing Spider-Man


So in the Newspaper Spider-Man Universe, any idiocy is possible, sure. But does anybody know what the protocol is for Random Alien Found in the regular Marvel Universe? The need for caution is understandable, yes, but is it really just "Throw him into Space Man Jail and maybe/maybe not dissect him and hope we don't get crawled by the rest of the people from his planet that we have undoubtedly now pissed off"?

More importantly, that raccoon is crossing his little legs!! :neckbeard:


Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Johnny Walker posted:

Mary Worth



You are a wizard.

Now I'm rooting for Iris getting a tramp stamp.

They should combine their interests and get matching Casablanca tattoos.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic


Diana! Quit that! You're embarrassing yourself! You're embarrassing ME!

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Rip Kirby


Well, I'd say he sexually assaulted you, but to-may-to, to-mah-to.


Big Ben Bolt

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann


Mind your own beeswax, Bernice.


The Amazing Spider-Man



Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




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Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann


The most charitable expectation is that Bernice is about to ruin Tiff's life because she's the RA and Tiff is breaking the rules. But we all know the real reason she's wrecking Tiff's life is because she has a thing for Piro and a resentment of Tiffany making friends with her friends and being popular in high school. Because Bernice sucks and the sucky assumption is always the correct one.

I guess there's an outside chance that Bern will actually help keep Tiff's secret, but I don't know how likely it is that the Evanses will be able to do that in a way that's consistent with her characterization.



:stare:


The Amazing Spider-Man



The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Slammy posted:

Any love for old Archie, or drop?

Old Archie got a genuine laugh out of me today, which is more than I can say for Modern Archie.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic




Radio Patrol


As there's no possible way to alert the police in the other city that an important bag full of stolen money and evidence is hanging out at their airport. I guess the only option is to go there in person to get the bag and hope they get there before the criminal. If only the telephone had been invented in 1946. :sigh:


Rip Kirby




Big Ben Bolt

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Aardmania posted:

9 Chickweed Lane

You know who would be the best person to have at my wedding? Someone who threatened to murder one of my parents.

I don't care how big of an assbag your dad is to your fiance you've known for a couple of days. You don't go from doting daughter seeking his blessing to sending him hot steamy vids of your very first gently caress to taking over his company to laughingly plotting his murder in the space of a couple of days. The parent/child bond is difficult to break, even for people whose parents are horrifically toxic. So I don't know if Brooke intends to write women as emotionless psychopaths, but he does.



The Amazing Spider-Man


Oh my God. Rocket. Panels three and four (not including the throwaways). Just look at him.


Sally Forth




The Heart of Juliet Jones




Prince Valiant




Phantom Classic




Big Ben Bolt

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Johnny Walker posted:

Rex Morgan MD



I'm not sure what my reaction would be if I were having a flirty conversation with a dude I just met and he told me his ex shot him in the head with a nailgun, but it probably wouldn't be that.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007





I forgive you for the year in the cave, Jam Esallen.

quote:

The Phantom


Most people would be like, "Hey, Chuck, can you grab me my briefcase out of the limo?" "Fetch it, Charles!" is the squawk of a nouveau riche fellow who can't even let just his butler forget for a moment how very much money he has.



Luann



The Amazing Spider-Man



Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann


It's sad. In this comic not even the trampy slutty dirty whore slut gets to have premarital sex. But she sure as hell still gets slut shamed.


The Amazing Spider-Man


Rocket in the back seat doing his own thing trying to ignore the boring grownups up front nattering on about who gives a gently caress. He reminds me of me on long car trips as a kid.


Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Kammat posted:

That chapter of Revelation describes the Whore of Babylon. Draw your own conclusions.

I guess she heard about the live-streamed gently caress fest.


Luann




The Amazing Spider-Man



Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones
p

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Kennel posted:

wikipedia posted:

She was a prominent society woman; an advocate of prison reform, women's suffrage and educational modernization; a white supremacist and slave owner; and one of the few prominent women who spoke in favor of lynching.

Good golly did my "Hell yeah!" turn into an "Ohhhhh, noooo" awfully fast.



Luann


Johnny Aztec posted:

Jesus, Bernice. Tone down the cuntiness a couple of notches, will you?



Also, loving TRYST?! One: Who the gently caress even says that word anymore and TWO: No wonder you're still a joyless virgin. Even a vegan can't stand your self righteousness.

No, no, it's Tiff who's being the twat here, obviously.




The Amazing Spider-Man



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The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic





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Rip Kirby





Big Ben Bolt


Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Shirec posted:

Aw dang, I didn't know that, ugh :smith: That's what I get for just being happy at the good stuff and not digging around

Roddenberry is dead and can no longer profit from his creation or his bad behavior. Like what you like. Everybody's lovely. Doesn't change that he made a great thing.


Luann


I never lived in a dorm and thus did not have to deal with an RA. Seems like this is far beyond what she would be able to claim was in the line of duty, right? You can't go all grabby hands on somebody's phone or their (or their friend's) property. I hope?


The Amazing Spider-Man


That looks like a pretty long drive, actually, so yeah. Go ahead and talk about Star-Lord and Groot.


Sally Forth


Sad, yes. But not alienating for me at the moment, unfortunately.


The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic





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Big Ben Bolt


Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007





Pff. Dilbert's a stupid idiot for not planning his life in a way that he wouldn't feel like he needed time off.


Luann


Why is Bernice even here? A small thing worth appreciating is that Piro hasn't even acknowledged Bernice's presence.


The Amazing Spider-Man



Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic





Radio Patrol





Rip Kirby





Big Ben Bolt


Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Nenonen posted:



It makes sense in Finnish - 'läppä' means joke, wisecrack etc. There's probably an English synonym that would pass but my thesaurus had nothing.

Maybe crock? It's not commonly used, but can be understood to mean a nonsensical lie as well as a type of jar.



The Amazing Spider-Man


He had this same conversation with Ant-Man.


Sally Forth




The Heart of Juliet Jones




Prince Valiant




Phantom Classic


Phantom and Devil with their arms around each others' shoulders (more or less). :3:


Big Ben Bolt

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




EasyEW posted:

Crankshaft



Um...what? WHAT?

I need a Red and Rover, stat.

I would have thought that the "joke" was that Crankshaft didn't raise his hand and the podium guy doesn't give a poo poo because Crankshaft is a known dickhead. But Batiuk didn't see fit to draw the panel in such a way that we can see what 'Shaft is doing, which makes me think this is a case of

Julet Esqu fucked around with this message at 05:10 on Feb 6, 2017

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann



The Amazing Spider-Man



Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones


Jules makes the best faces.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann


I'm 95% sure they're being sarcastic, with a 5% allotted as room for doubt because it's the Evanses and this is Luann.


The Amazing Spider-Man


Hey! I accuse you of being a dick! (Super hacky, right? I bet everybody does that joke. Not that it slowed me down for even a second.)


Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones


This being a newspaper comic from 1959, there's no possible way she kicks him in the balls, but you can tell she really wishes she could. That's nice.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann


Such a fun couple.



And because I know you're curious:




The Amazing Spider-Man



Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones


Brutal.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann


Commenters are just going back and forth about whether this is too sexy or not sexy enough. (They do mostly seem to find it pretty hot, though.)


The Amazing Spider-Man


Spidey, you doof, you forgot you weren't wearing your costume last time. :doh:


Sally Forth



The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic




Classic Phantom has one of the all time great poo poo-eating grins.


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Rip Kirby





Big Ben Bolt


Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Intolerable Horror


That wasn't the Intolerable part. I'm easing you in. Brace yourselves:








Ok, you made it! Now here are some good comics.

(ETA: Weirdly, Mordok999 is just nattering on about the rec-room TV. It's like once the strip is actually explicitly about sex he loses his interest.)


The Amazing Spider-Man



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The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu fucked around with this message at 22:28 on Feb 10, 2017

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic





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Rip Kirby





Big Ben Bolt


Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Luann


Mordock got his mojo back! Kind of. Also... well, you just better look for yourself:



Truly, the Internet is a force for evil.


The Amazing Spider-Man


Confirmed: :spidey: <--- Those ain't brain-waves.


Sally Forth


If Ted is identifying with the dude in Cats in the Cradle, he may have misinterpreted the song.


The Heart of Juliet Jones

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Phantom Classic





Radio Patrol





Rip Kirby





Big Ben Bolt


Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




The Amazing Spider-Man




Sally Forth




The Heart of Juliet Jones




Prince Valiant




Phantom Classic




Big Ben Bolt

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




smug n stuff posted:

I dunno, Curtis is a lot better than Baldo imo, especially considering it has the amazing :catdrugs: Kwanzaa specials

Though they seem to have stopped doing those. :(

My internet is being just the worst today, so my good comics will have to wait until it stops doing that. Here's some Luann, though! It's time to poo poo on Les!

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Still only Luann today because my Internet persists in being a piece of poo. There will be a catchup post if/when I get any kind of a reasonable connection. I suspect it's related to some of the weather issues we're having up here in Northern California. You may have heard about them.

Anyway, here's a big flood of garbage:



We've flown well beyond the realm of plausible deniability that Pru doesn't realize he's got a thing for her. I mean, I think we did that a long time ago when he bought her expensive jewelry for Christmas, but today we've circled back around and made another pass. I don't buy that this New York theater lesbian is just naive. Whatever, Pru. Milk him for all he's worth. He's one of the characters who isn't allowed experience happiness.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007





Gross.


Endless Mike posted:

This made me check when my license expires.

2020! I'm good!

It's like that one time a lady in Mary Worth got her wallet stolen and had to contact all her credit card companies and a bunch of us were like, "Oh, poo poo, that would be a total pain in the rear end! We better make a list of our credit cards, just in case!" Newspaper comics serve an important educational function and should continue to be supported.


Not a "lister," an rear end in a top hat. But I recognize that the writer of Dustin does not know the difference.





1. Why is Pru wearing scrubs?
2. "Kids First keeps me hoppin'." "The Fuse is hustlin'!" The speech of young people.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




SomeMathGuy posted:

Mark Trail

"Give it a chance, MathGuy, they haven't elaborated yet," I thought to myself yesterday. More fool me.

Yep. Because the pictures that got everybody so warm on social media that appeared to be of Great White Hunters standing over dead Cecils and giraffes and elephants were all actually of brave individuals saving Africans from man-eaters. Thanks, Mark Trail!

(Spoiling for :nms: and also sad and angryfying)



Thanks for saving everybody from that monster, Lady!

Mark Trail coming out in favor of big game hunting. I did not expect to see that.

Here's something that's also gross:

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




SomeMathGuy posted:

Mark Trail Meets Continued Justification for My Rigorous Use of Adblock


One of my bosses is an ancient old man who's been an avid hunter all his life and he says that what he really loves about hunting is that you're matching wits against this beast who has to be pretty crafty if he managed to survive long enough to be any kind of an impressive catch. So even he says that a lot of hunting these days, you set up your gun with its scope and it auto-aims for you and when this animal who doesn't even know you're around wanders across your path you press a button and shoot it from some ridiculous distance away, and that's not hunting, it's bullshit. Now, I don't hunt, so I don't know much about the state of hunting these days. My boss has been known to be full of poo poo. But he knows about hunting. If he says that hunts today take no skill, I believe him.

(Granted, plenty of people still hunt the old-fashioned way that takes skill. I don't feel big game trophy hunters deserve much benefit of the doubt due to gently caress them.)




He's got an arm around you, Pru. It's a fancy restaurant on Valentine's week. You really expect anybody to believe you're not getting this?

Julet Esqu fucked around with this message at 19:01 on Feb 17, 2017

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Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




Aardmania posted:

9 Chickweed Lane


I can't believe Brooke passed up the opportunity to write "capisce".


In a storyline that is sure to be infuriating every step of the way, let's take a moment to appreciate that at least Jam Esallen had the decency to make all the Americans dress like total dingdongs.

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