- Pinche Rudo
- Feb 8, 2005
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Hardcore Justice opens up with Hogan backstage with Immortal, nervously hovering over a circle of doctors and nurses around...Eric Bischoff's hospital bed? Hogan looks to one of the Doctors, seemingly skeptical about the situation. "You sure it's safe for him to be here?" He asks, peering over them at the comatose Bischoff. One of the Doctors looks up from his clipboard "He's stable and breathing on his own, he just hasn't regained consciousness. It's safe for him to be here, and if any issue came up we have a full medical staff." Hogan nods "I'm just making sure he's gonna be OK. After all, it was my crazy idea having him here, feeling the energy of the crowd going crazy when Abyss destroys that son of a bitch Steiner." Hogan steps forward and grabs Bischoff's hand "I'm gonna make that son of a bitch pay, brother. I'm gonna get him back for what he's done to you." Hogan sighs, letting go of his old friend's hand and turning to the rest of Immortal. "You go out there and kick some loving rear end for him, boys." He walks over and gets in Abyss's face "And you destroy Steiner. You break every bone in his loving body. You make him bleed, you make him suffer. Anything else, is not acceptable."
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The Camera pans around the arena for Hardcore Justice! Suddenly, loud metal guitar music blasts from the entrance ramp. It's the British Invasion! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwpoV3xtpSg Magnus and Douglas come to the ring, waving the Union Jack and hyping up the crowd as they come down the Entrance Ramp. Then, Skynyrd hits....it's the Briscoes! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8egE4x9Djo They come down to the ring decked out in the stars and bars, screaming various obscenities and showing off their garbage can filled with weapons. The Invasion extend their hands to shake like proper British Gentlemen, but #DEMBOYS aren't here to shake hands, they're here to fight! Before the ref can step between them, Mark throws a bullet hole riddled stop sign at Magnus' face! The Ref rings the bell, this is on! Jay kicks Doug Williams in the gut and goes for a Jay Driller right off the bat! Williams' judo training kicks in and he executes a textbook double leg takedown and starts pummeling the elder Briscoe. Magnus is reeling from the stop sign shot, and eats a series of vicious forearm and elbow shots from Mark. He staggers to the ropes and Mark hits a dropkick, sending Magnus to the outside!
Mark turns and quickly jumps on the back of Williams, who has controlled Jay on the ground. Williams quickly shifts his weight and tosses Mark onto the prone Jay! Williams follows up with a knee to Mark's spine as Magnus staggers back into the ring. Magnus has something in his hands....it's fish and chips wrapped in newspaper! Mark gets to his feet just in time for Magnus to get his revenge, he whacks Mark over the head with the greasy vittles! Mark screams in agony as the burning hot oil and salt has gotten into his eyes! "Don't forget the malt vinegar, Mauro! That poo poo is like mace!" Mark blindly turns to Williams who hits him with a European Uppercut, he staggers back to Magnus who does the same! Mark is ping ponged back and forth between the two Brits with alternating uppercuts while Jay gets to his feet and snarls, springing towards Williams and hitting him with a big boot! Mark is frantically wiping his eyes as Magnus heads to the trash can of weapons and pulls out an....umbrella? Magnus goes to bring the weapon down on Mark's head when he's interrupted by a blind palm strike right to Magnus' throat! Mark has harnessed the power of Redneck Kung Fu and is fighting blind! He unleashes a flurry of strikes on Magnus then sends him into the ropes, and hits a drop kick, sending Magnus to the outside oncre more.
Mark gets out on the apron as Magnus staggers to his feet, just in time for a running senton from the younger Briscoe! Jay and Doug square off, trading a couple quick rear waist locks before Jay drops Doug on his knee, yelling at Mark to get his rear end in there! Mark pops up on the apron and hits a springboard leg drop on Williams! Jay goes for the cover: 1, 2...Williams kicks out! Jay sends Williams into the corner, and both Briscoes charge wildly! Jay hits a big boot to the face while Mark hits a low angle drop kick. Mark starts climbing the turnbucke as Jay goes to get Williams on his shoulders for the Doomsday Device but Magnus hits him with a chair! Jay staggers and drops Williams as Magnus lays a shot onto Mark's back, sending him flying to the outside. Williams recovers and grabs Jay from behind as Magnus sprints back and delivers a big boot to Jay's jaw. Williams uses the momentum from the move to hit the elder Briscoe with a bridging german suplex! 1...2....Jay kicks out! Magnus screams in anger and goes to grab the chair while Williams pulls Jay up and holds him for another shot. Magnus gets close the ropes when Mark grabs his leg and pulls him to the outside and delivers a super kick! Jay breaks Williams hold and muscles the Judoka up for a Death Valley Driver! Mark pops up on the apron with a chair and points his thumb skyward to Jay, signaling for the Doomsday Device. Jay picks the beaten Williams up on his shoulders in the electric chair position. Mark gets on the turnbuckle, facing away from the two with the chair in his hands. He springs backwards, rotation 180 degrees in the air and smacking Williams in the face with the chair! Jay goes for the pin: 1.....2....3! #DEMBOYS are your winners! They celebrate with the stars and bars, screaming insults at the fallen British Gentlemen to a chorus of loud boos! This crowd is hot, folks and HARDCORE JUSTICE is just starting!
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It's time for Knockouts action with Madison Rayne, Angelina Love, Winter and Mickie James taking on Io & Mio Shirai, Misaki Ohata and Velvet Sky! Angelina Love starts the match against Misaki Ohata, but Velvet Sky tags herself in immediately! She wants to get back at her former beautiful people teammates for what they've said about her relationship! They wrestle evenly for a bit before the heels gain the avantage, keeping Velvet in their corner. Attempts at a tag by Velvet are cut off multiple times before Velvet is eventually able to duck a running ropkick by Mickie James, causing Mickie to hit her own teammates! In the confusion, Velvet makes the tag to Io! Io lays into James with stiff strikes and German suplexes, tagging in her Joshi partners to let them get some shots in too! Mickie James tries to fight off the onslaught, but she's unable to combat the smooth teamwork of 3 unfamiliar opponents. Eventually, however, she is able to make the tag to Madison Rayne! Rayne makes a mad dash for Io Shirai... Straight into a brutal stiff kick to the head! Rayne crumples to the ground, unconscious! The ref doesn't need a second look to declare the match as ending via knockout! Rayne is stretchered away from the ring! We hope she's OK!
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Kevin Steen is shown backstage. He talks about The Minotaur, a creature awaiting brave heroes at the end of the labyrinth. He then compares Crimson to The Minotaur, in that both of them are big, hairy, stinking subhumans. (That and he's a ginger.) He scoffs at Crimsons undefeated streak, saying “A big string of easy victories over a bunch of F****** NOBODIES? That's hardly heroic.” Steen finishes with "Much like The Minotaur was Bruised, Broken and Vanquished, I too with utterly destroy you for the sake of my beloved son Owen, because I. AM. A. HERO."
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Some generic Post Hardcore music blares through the Impact Zone, it's Crimson! Crimson saunters down to the ring and scowls at the ramp as he waits for his opponent. Then a few bars of Drowning Pool play https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAqIDysOcZQ and out comes Kevin Steen! Steen points at the camera "I'M GOING TO SLAY THE MINOTAUR FOR YOU OWEN!" he screams, clenching his fist then turning his glance towards the ring. Steen and Crimson move quicky to face off, and have to be separated by the ref in order to start the match. The ref rings the bell and the two men immediately start slugging it out in the center of the ring! Steen gets the advantage after an eye rake, sending Crimson into the ropes and hitting him with a shoulder block, but Crimson isn't fazed. He yells at Steen to give him what he's got and points to the ropes. Steen nods "Ok Ok, I'm gonna run into you with everything I've..." Steen hits a dropkick, sending Crimson to the mat. Steen jumps over Crimson and hits the ropes, coming back as Crimson pops up and returns the favor, unleashing a brutal dropkick to Steen. Steen goes down and eats a quick diving knee from Crimson. Steen rolls away and gets to his feet as Crimson throws a quick knee, knocking him back into the corner. Crimson runs in and hits Steen with a shoulder block. Steen stumbles out of the corner as Crimson purses, only to be hit by a quick superkick! Steen moves with blinding speed and grabs Crimson, planting him with a DDT. Steen moves into a headlock, yelling at the crowd and the camera.
Some random fan boos him and Steen responds "Shut the gently caress up, I'm doing this for my son! I will keep this headlock on all night long!" Crimson fights his way up but Steen tosses Crimson into the corner. Steen starts kicking him repeatedly, sending the big man down to the mat. Crimson lies, slumped against the bottom turnbuckle, and Steen runs away from the corner and starts back to build up momentum. He goes for the cannonball senton but Crimson evades him at the last moment. Crimson rolls to the side as Steen flops out of the corner and struggles to get up. Crimson reaches his feet before Steen and catches him with a spear! Crimson goes for the pin, 1....2... Steen kicks out! Crimson pulls Steen up and goes for the Red Alert but Steen blocks and drives a knee into Crimson's gut. Steen follows up with a teardrop suplex then starts viciously stomping on Crimson. He picks Crimson up in the fireman's carry, DEEP SEA DIVERTICULITIS! Steen goes for the pin, 1....2... Crimson kicks out. Steen looks a bit frustrated as he picks up Crimson then sends him into the corner. Crimson immediately slumps to the bottom turnbuckle as Steen revs up his engine and hits the cannonball senton! Steen rolls back and laughs, pointing at the crowd. "I told you, I told you I'd slay the Minotaur. And you didn't loving believe me, did you?!"
Steen's bragging to the crowd gives Crimson time to roll to the apron. Steen purses and picks Crimson up, smiling at the crowd then hitting Crimson with a DDT on the apron! Crimson hits the hard edge of the ring and doesn't move much, laying prone on the apron. Steen pulls Crimson's legs out and picks him up, POWER BOMB ON THE APRON! Crimson is in serious pain, writhing on the ground. Steen looks over at the Spanish announce table and smiles. He brings the broken Crimson and lays him on the table. Steen pulls a ladder out from under the ring and sets it up next to the table. What is he doing? Steen starts climbing the ladder and points to the crowd as they are aghast. "Why aren't you cheering for the hero? WHY AREN'T YOU CHEERING?!!?! I'LL SHOW YOU!!" He finishes climbing the ladder and looks down at the prone Crimson, then jumps off! BIG BOY SENTON THROUGH THE SPANISH ANNOUNCE TABLE! CRIMSON IS DESTROYED!
Steen rolls off, holding his back and slowly making his way to his feet. He stumbles over to the Ref, grabbing his shirt "CALL THE MATCH! I DESTROYED HIM! I WIN!" The Ref doesn't know what to do, he stops and checks on Crimson. Crimson mumbles something, but isn't moving much. Meanwhile, Steen starts grabbing every folding chair in the vicinity and forming a pile. Steen looks at the Ref "CALL THE loving MATCH!" Before the Ref can react Steen grabs Crimson, then powerbombs him onto the chairs! He keeps screaming at the Ref to stop the match! The Ref tries to lean in to check on Crimson. but he doesn't even get close enough to check! Steen grabs Crimson and powerbombs him again! He picks him up and powerbombs him a third time! The Ref calls the match! STEEN IS YOUR WINNER. Steen gets onto the turnbuckle to celebrate, holding a slightly larger picture of his son.
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Some more generic TNA rock music plays, it's GUNNER! Gunner comes down the ring, snarling and ready for a fight. Then....OLE OLE OLE.....IT'S the Television Champion Den Generiska!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KABUQxllGbk The Generic Luchador runs down the entrance ramp, stopping to high five fans as he makes his way to the ring. Generiska gets on the turnbuckle and holds the Television Title high over his head. They get into the center of the ring for introductions. "Ladies and Gentlemen, this match is for the TNA Television Title. Introducing the Challenger: From Hickory, North Carolina; weighing in at 247 pounds....Gunner! And the Champion, from Helsingborg, Sweden; weighing in at 210 pounds....DEN GENERISKA!" The ref takes the belt, shows it to the challenger and rings the bell. We're underway! Generiska comes sprinting out of the corner looking for an Ole kick right off the bat! Gunner sidesteps the luchador as he overshoots his target. Generiska's foot goes over the top turnbuckle, momentarily trapping him in the corner giving Gunner an opening and he takes advantage of it with a back suplex! Gunner picks up the generic luchador and sends him into the ropes, then grabs him off the rebound for a spinning spinebuster! Gunner goes for the quick cover 1....Kick out! Generiska pops up and hits a quick forearm to the surprised Gunner.
Gunner retaliates with one of his own, stunning Generiska then picking him up for a vertical suplex. Generiska kicks his legs to change the momentum and reverses it into a deep arm drag! Gunner comes up off the arm drag and eats a running crossbody from Generiska! Generiska tries to hold the big man down for a pin: 1.....2...Gunner kicks out! Gunner quickly rolls out of the ring to get his bearings but Generiska isn't content to let him get away so easily! Generiska tries to hype the crowd up, then sprints into the ropes, bouncing back to get that momentum up and hits a picture perfect Tope Con Hilo!! Gunner takes it straight on and sprawls to the ground. Generiska springs to his feet and celebrates! OLE!!! Gunner looks around as Generiska poses for the crowd, sliding his hand underneath the ring and coming out with a steel chair! He scrambles to his feet and catches Generiska in the gut with the edge of the chair as he turns around! Ladies and Gentlemen, don't forget every match tonight...IS A HARDCORE MATCH! Gunner smacks the chair over Generiska's back, sending the Generic Luchador to the mat. He picks up the prone Generiska in a powerslam, then throws him face first on the apron! Gunner, back in control rolls Generiska into the ring and tosses the chair in before sliding under the ropes. Gunner picks up Generiska and hits a side slam backbreaker, then holds the Luchador over his knee and turns it into a submission! He presses down on the face and thigh of Generiska, bending him backwards over his knee. Generiska refuses to give up even though his spine is being bent the wrong way!
Generiska fights back, prying Gunner's hand off his face and slipping out of the hold. He rolls away from Gunner, who quickly pursues the Generic Luchador only to be met with an exploder suplex into the turnbuckles! Gunner is dazed! Generiska gathers a head of steam and hits a dropkick onto the prone Gunner! He runs to the opposite corner and begins hyping the crowd up. Gunner slowly makes his way to his feet as his glazed over eyes come into focus on the chair just a few feet away. He begins to move for it when Generiska sprints at him full speed. HE HITS THE OLE KICK! Gunner is out on his feet! Generiska picks him up and twists him in mid air, BLUE THUNDER BOMB ON THE CHAIR! Generico holds him down for the pin: 1....2....3! Generiska retains the Television Title!
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The camera pans over the ringside area, showing a good chunk of the TNA Roster out acting as lumberjacks! There are weapons scattered all over the ringside area between the men who glare at each other. You can feel the tension in the air for this match!
Bully Ray comes out and down to the ring, cursing at fans the entire way down. Alex Shelley comes out and high fives fans along the ramp as he makes his way to the ring, staring a few lumberjacks down. Both men get in the ring, the lumberjacks are ready and we are underway! This match starts out slower than one would expect from this type of match, with Shelley and Bully Ray feeling each other out for a couple minutes, testing each other with greco roman knuckle locks before starting in on the attack. Bully Ray comes in for a lariat but Shelley ducks and hits an enziguri to the back of Bully Ray's head. Ray stumbles and catches a backstabber from Shelley! Shelley goes for a quick moonsault but Bully Ray manages to get up and stop Shelley before he can execute! Bully Ray hits the ropes and crotches Shelley on the turnbuckle. Ray pulls Shelley off the turnbuckle for a german suplex! Ray goes for the pin: 1.....2... Shelley kicks out! Ray hits the ropes and cracks Shelley in the face with a big boot as he tries to get up. Shelley goes and Ray picks him back up, setting up for a piledriver but Shelley reverses into a back body drop! Shelley gets Bully Ray up and whips him into the corner, sending Ray down to the canvas.
Before Bully can get his bearings, he is eating Shelley’s double knees! Shelly immediately gets up and grabs Bully for the Sliced Bread #2! He goes for the pin: 1…2... It takes more than that to stop an ECW Alumnus. Bully Ray gets up, and doesn’t look fazed at all. He turns to Shelley, who is already on the rebound, running the ropes to kick him out of the ring! Bully tries to hold his ground, but a second running kick sends him over the ropes, and into the waiting weapons of the lumberjacks! The first one to reach Bully Ray is Samoa Joe, who kicks him hard in the gut, sending him to the barricade. Before he can catch his breath, Okato is there, chair in hand, and beans him with a chair. Joe takes advantage of this, and whips Bully Ray back into the ring, where Alex Shelley awaits.
Taking advantage of his prone opponent, Shelley grabs Bully Ray into the Border City Stretch! Bully screams in agony as he makes his way towards the ropes. As Shelley is concentrating on keeping the hold locked in, he doesn’t notice Bully grabbing the 2x4 that was surreptitiously left in the ring, until Bully conks him with it, repeatedly. Shelley is forced to release the hold, and Bully Ray goes on the attack.
With the brutality you’d expect, Bully Ray starts beating Shelley senseless. Shelley is barely able to keep going. Bully whips him out of the ring, and Mr. Anderson is there, whacking Shelley with a Singapore cane. He throws Shelley into the ring… right into a Senton by Bully Ray! Bully Ray goes the pinL 1…2…2.9! Alex Shelley is still in this somehow! Bully Ray is infuriated, and shouts at the top of his lungs:
"DEVON!!"
"YEAH?"
"GET THE NEW GUY!"
Devon throws a table into the ring, and as he sets it up, D’Angelo Dinero gets into the ring. The three of them set Shelley up for a familiar maneuver! 3D! All three celebrate by standing on Shelley for the pin: 1…2…3! Team 3D has reunited, with new member D’Angelo Dinero, and with their help, Bully Ray Dudley has defeated Alex Shelley!
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Orale guey, Mexican America is here! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3dmRxIWaSQ Both men come down to the ring riding lowrider bicycles with baskets full of weapons, waving Mexican flags. BEER MONEY https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pk9wbwCT_uc Beer Money come down to the ring, holding a giant open topped tub cooler filled with ice between them. Everyone leaves their respective items at ringside. "Ladies and Gentlemen, this match is for the TNA World Tag Team Championship! Your challengers: De donde el imposible es posible! At a combined weight of 492 pounds. Mexican America! Your champions: From the place with the coldest beer in town, Beer Money!" The teams return to their corners and the bell rings.
Hernandez starts against Storm. Both big men tie up in the middle of the ring. Hernandez gets a head lock, utilizing his size advantage over Storm. Storm separates Hernandez's grip and uses leverage to pull the big man down and slap on his own headlock. Hernandez pushes Storm into the ropes, and Storm bounces back with a shoulder...no. Hernandez doesn't budge. He points to the perpendicular ropes. Storm sprints for another shoulder block aaaannnddd...doesn't move Hernandez. Hernandez laughs "It's my turn!" then sprints into the ropes at full speed, bouncing back and dropping his shoulder into Storm. Storm goes flying! Hernandez drags Storm into his corner then starts stomping and tags in Prince Puma! Puma jumps on the ropes, SPRINGBOARD 450! Puma hooks the leg for the pin: 1....2.... Storm gets a shoulder up! Puma sprints across the ring and hits a rope assisted enziguri on Roode, sending him flying to the floor!
Hernandez runs over and starts brawling with Roode while Puma and Storm continue in the ring. Puma runs back as storm gets to his feet and is caught with a lariat! Storm picks Puma up and hits him with a suplex. Puma hits the mat hard as Storm goes for the Sharpshooter but Puma manages a scorpion kick right to Storm in the dick! "Ay yay yay, he's feeling like he had a real bad trip to the barrio!" Storm stumbles and Puma takes advantage, hitting a jumping boot to Storm's head. Storm stumbles into the corner and Puma follows up with a flash kick! Hernandez whacks Roode on the outside and gestures to Puma. "Get him, guey!" Puma nods and sprints into the ropes, then hits a step up tope con hilo on Roode! "Holy poo poo! Holy poo poo!" the crowd chants. Puma slowly gets into the ring and tags Hernandez. Hernandez runs at Storm and hits a splash in the corner. Storm stumbles out and Hernandez goes for a back body drop but is blocked! Storm counters with a gutbuster! Hernandez stumbles back and Storm hits a superkick! Hernandez crumples from the blow and Storm staggers towards his corner, where Roode has just gotten onto the apron. Storm tags in Roode! Roode comes in and hits Hernandez with some forearm shots then turns the big man around and with a wiggle of the hips, hits the RUDE AWAKENING. Roode goes for the pin 1....2... Hernandez kicks out! Roode runs and hits a shoulderblock on Puma, sending him off the apron. James Storm comes into the ring, realizing it's going to take all the beer and all the money to put the big man away. They grab Hernandez and hit a double suplex! Roode grabs Hernandez's legs and pulls back, catapulting him to Storm who hits a DDT! Storm goes for the pin: 1.....2.... Puma comes in to break it up! Roode jumps from behind Puma to hit a rolling neckbreaker! Storm picks up the luchador and hits a Samoan drop while Roode hits another neckbreaker! Both men are out! Double pin 1....2... no both kick out!
Roode and Storm go back to focus on Hernandez, going to set him up for the DWI but Puma hits a gamen giri on storm from behind! Storm is staggered! Puma ducks a lariat from Roode and hits the ropes for momentum. He rolls underneath another Roode lariat then pops up, jumping into the air and catching Storm in a front facelock...hanging momentarily in the air then....DDT! Puma pops up and dodges a spear from Roode, who hits Hernandez! Puma turns and goes after Storm! Storm staggers towards the corner but Puma jumps up from behind him, POISONED RANA.... NO STORM BLOCKS IT! Puma is hanging off Storm's back! Roode hits a shotgun dropkick right into Puma's face! Storm pulls Puma up, then spins him into a powerbomb position. Roode is ready! The crowd is hyped, it's Happy Hour ladies and gentlemen! Storm powerbombs him into Roode's neckbreaker! DRINKING WHILE INVESTING! Storm goes for the pin 1....2....3... Your champs retain!
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Austin Aries comes out to the ring, mic in hand! "Well, you know what they always say. Plans change, right? And lemme tell ya, they change for the dumbest of reasons, and tonight is no different! It appears my opponent for the night, the, spoiler alert, FORMER X Division champion Brian Kendrick, has not only ducked a fight with me, he's up and left the whole loving company, abandoning you all and leaving the title... vacant. Why, you ask? Well, to that, I say, I'm surprised. Not that that loser ran away, though. I'm surprised that the mass of beta cucks in the crowd don't get the actions of one of their own! Cause, you see, there are two types of people in the world. There are ALPHAS, those with GAME, who can get anything and everything in the world that they desire, and then there's the Betas, people like Kendrick, people like you losers in... whatever fuckin' hick town this shithole is, who don't have any game to speak of, and are only fit to take the scraps we Alphas leave behind. I knew Kendrick was a Beta from day one, but recently he's been really showing off his cmplete lack of testosterone with all that nerd poo poo he was doin'. I mean, come the gently caress on, LE Brian Kendrick. Do I look like I speak Mexican, man? It's no wonder that a wimp like him wouldn't want to fight a stud like me, and honestly I don't blame him for leaving, cause you see, THAT BETA CUCK BITCH BOY INCEL SPENGLER COULDN'T MATCH UP TO ME ON ANY NIGHT! So I say, considering the circumstances, we just go ahead and declare my victory by forfeit, so you cucks can all get to worshipping your NEW X Division champion, THE AMERICAN ALPHA, AUSTIN ARIES!"
"Now where the gently caress's that be-" Aries is interrupted by ERIC YOUNG'S MUSIC! Aries is initially shocked, but his expression quickly turns to an evil grin when he sees that Young is clearly putting quite some effort in even making it to the ring, various parts of his body covered in KT tape. Young slides in to the ring and Aries attacks him immediately! No time for intros, the ref rings the bell and this match is underway! Aries works on Young's taped up back and neck, delivering vicious stops to the injured man. It was a herculean effort just to show up for this match! Aries drops down and gets Young in a headlock, maybe trying for that bridging arm triangle choke already! Young manages to pry Aries' hands off him and rolls out to the apron. Aries follows and immediately hits a jumping knee, sending Young sprawling to the outside. Aries poses around the ring for a bit, then goes out to pursue Young. As soon as Aries hits the mat on the outside Young hits him with a superkick! However, his taped up knee buckles underneath his weight and he is unable to capitalize! Aries is momentarily staggered, but smiles and grabs Young and slams his face into the apron! Aries rolls him into the ring, then hits a springboard missile dropkick before Young can even make it to his feet! Young goes sprawling towards the opposite ropes, putting him in perfect position for Aries as he runs over, hurdles his prone opponent and hits a Lionsault! Aries goes for the pin 1...2...kick out!
Young is in obvious pain as Aries again goes to work on him with another grounded headlock, sliding his hand underneath his opponent's head and trapping his arm. D'Arce choke! Aries can't get the bridge for leverage, but the damage to Young's neck has to be bad at this point! Young manages to free himself and gets to his feet. His eyes are glazed over, he's gasping for air but he's still in this match! Aries comes at him looking for an elbow but Young grabs him, belly to belly suplex! Young goes for the pin: 1....Aries kicks out! Young is just not able to even get a solid cover, he's in a world of hurt. Young works on Aries, trying to go for a figure four but eats a kick to the face! Aries gets up and sends Young into the ropes, Aries hits a Japanese arm drag! Aries picks up Young and sends him into the corner, then follows up with a dropkick! "Boom goes the IED!" Yikes, Taz. Aries pulls young out of the corner then hits a Saito suplex! He starts strutting around the ring, letting the crowd know he is the one true American Alpha in TNA! Aries picks up Young and hits the rolling fireman's carry, then transitions immediately into the bridging arm triangle choke!
"HE'S GOT IT IN! THE FALSE FLAG! WE CAN ALL SEE IT'S CLEARLY A FALSE FLAG! JET FUEL CAN'T MELT STEEL BEAMS MAURO!"
"You've been watching too much Infowars, Tenay"
Young taps out after only a few seconds! Your new X Division Champion, The American Alpha Austin Aries!
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AJ Styles comes to the ring with his Boys, posing and preening with them as he struts around the ring. Suddenly, he is interrupted by Christopher Daniels' music! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uv7ebdJp8o4 Daniels has a microphone and stops at the top of the entrance ramp. "So I'm glad to see our lost little bird has come for his rear end whipping. That's perfect, because I'm here to deliver it to you!" Daniels slowly starts making his way down the ramp towards ringside. "Poor Frankie, he is so distraught over your betrayal he can't make it out tonight! So I'm here to deliver the beating on his behalf!" He slides into the ring and throws the microphone into AJ's face!
The ref rings the bell as AJ staggers back from the microphone to the face! Daniels immediately hits a drop kick, sending AJ sprawling across the ring. Daniels relentlessly pursues Styles picking him up and sending him into the ropes. AJ bounces back and is caught Daniels who hits a sidewalk slam! Daniels goes for the pin out of instinct then stops and stands up. No....no Daniels isn't going to end this early. He's going to make the Tango Turkey suffer in front of his boys! Daniels picks AJ up for a powerbomb but it gets reversed into a hurricanrana! Daniels rolls through and pops up just in time to catch a vicious pair of leg kicks. Daniels ducks underneath a spinning backfist and grabs AJ with a rear waistlock, but his attempt at a German suplex is thwarted by a couple of quick elbows from the Tango Turkey. AJ goes for the Pele kick but it gets caught by Daniels! He slams AJ's knee hard into the mat and tries to transition into the Koji Clutch but AJ rolls him through and tries for the Calf Killer but the Fallen Angel manages to hold on to one of AJ's legs and transitions into a knee bar! An excellent display of technical wrestling from these two veterans! Styles frees his leg and kicks Daniels in the face with his heel! Daniels relinquishes the hold and both men kip up to their feet! AJ sprints at Daniels, who sidesteps him. AJ goes into the ropes and comes back, Daniels leapfrogs him and rolls back onto his shoulders for a roll through but Styles stops his momentum and delivers a vicious kick to Daniels' chest! AJ steps forward and deadlifts Daniels for a german....no he plants Daniels face down with a sitout slam! Styles rolls Daniels over for the pin, clutching one of his opponents' legs for leverage. 1....2...Daniels kicks out!
The Fallen Angel recovers and throws a kick, but its get caught by Styles. Daniels quickly follows up with an Enziguri! The Turkey stumbles and Daniels picks him up in a fireman's carry...sit out death valley driver! Daniels pops up and sprints, jumping onto the middle rope....BEST. MOONSAULT. EVER. He doesn't even bother with the pin! He pulls AJ into a sitting position then runs into the ropes and hits the low diving clothesline to the back of AJ's neck! Daniels quickly pulls him back up, smiling at the crowd. "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ABANDON YOUR FRIENDS!" He shouts, then plants AJ with the STO! AJ rolls away to the outside to recover! His boys quickly come over and fan their prone....uhh.....friend? "I don't know what kind of relationship this is, guys." The Boys are concentrating on fanning AJ with all their might, giving the Daniels the opening to hit a springboard plancha, taking out both of the Boys! AJ gets to his feet, enraged that his Boys have been attacked! He throws a vicious superman forearm to Daniels, then throws him into the ringpost! AJ checks on his Boys, then hops on the apron and hits a somersault senton onto Daniels! AJ rolls through to his feet then hops up on the barricade and hits a moonsault onto the prone Daniels! The tango turkey is in attack mode, folks! AJ rolls him into the ring then hits a springboard 450! He hooks the leg for the pin: 1....2...NO! Daniels gets a shoulder up. AJ hits a superkick, then a spinning kick, then a pele kick in quick succession! What a combo! Daniels is staggering and AJ hits him with a snap suplex into the turnbuckle! Daniels slumps to the mat and AJ struts around a bit, posing for the crowd then picking his opponent up and getting him in the Styles clash....wait no what is this....kneeling ganso bomb! THE GOBBLEPOINT!
As AJ is about to pose a bit more he is interrupted by the sound of steel on flesh! KAZARIAN HAS COME OUT OF THE CROWD AND IS LAYING INTO THE BOYS WITH A STEEL CHAIR! AJ is in shock! He takes a step forward but Daniels grabs his foot, holding him back as Kazarian continues to viciously beat the boys, taunting Styles the whole time! Styles shakes the hand off and prepares for a springboard maneuver when Daniels jumps on his back! Daniels wraps his leg around the front of AJ's neck and locks his hands around his throat! STANDING KOJI CLUTCH! THE CHRISTO! AJ staggers back and lets out a gurgling howl as Kazarian punishes his Boys! Styles tries to reach the ropes but the Fallen Angel increases the force on the hold! Styles falls to one knee and screams, reaching out to his boys as they reach towards him from outside the ring. Kazarian is standing over them and screaming at AJ "WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?! I'M GOING TO KILL YOUR loving BOYS YOU loving JUDAS!" Styles cries out again, this time in rage! He lets out an inhuman cry and flips Daniels off, then locks in the Calf Killer! He reaches back with one arm and wraps it around Daniels' neck, pulling the Fallen Angel's head back; wrenching his spine while crushing his calf against the bone! Daniels taps! Styles is the winner! Styles immediately releases the hold and goes after Kaz! Kazarian evades Styles as Daniels rolls out of the ring. Both men head up the ramp while AJ stops to check on his Boys. THIS IS NOT THE END OF THIS, FOLKS
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THE SIRENS HIT! IT'S TIME FOR SCOTT loving STEINER! Steiner comes down to the ring for his First Round Best at Super Hossing Tournament Match presented by Hoss's Loaded Burgers! He grabs a mic and starts shouting. "HOGAN YOU loving PUSSY! GET OUT HERE AND TELL ME WHO I'M FACING OR I'M COMING AFTER YOU WITH A BASEBALL BAT LIKE I DID YOUR LITTLE BITCH BISCHOFF" Hogan's music hits and he comes to the top of the ramp "Let me tell you something Steiner! You put one of my best friends in a coma! He may never loving wake up! You're gonna pay! You're gonna pay with your blood, brother! YOU'RE FACING THE MONSTER TONIGHT, ABYSS!"
Abyss comes out, carrying a trash can full of weapons. Hogan nods at him and points Steiner. Abyss smiles underneath the mask, slowly making his way to the ring. He throws the trash can into the ring and gets in, Steiner staring him down the entire time. The bell rings, this match is on! Abyss reaches into the trash can and pulls out a 2x4! He charges at Steiner and swings the 2x4, but Steiner sidesteps and hits him with a German suplex! Steiner picks up the 2x4 and cracks Abyss across the face as he gets up! Abyss hits the mat and and Steiner follows up by continuing to beat on Abyss with the 2x4. He tosses it aside and goes for a quick Steiner Recliner but Abyss pulls Steiner down by the leg and starts hammering on him! Abyss tries to choke Steiner but Steiner muscles his way out of it and both men stand up! They start brawling and throwing forearms to each other, yelling like madmen!
Steiner goes for the irish whip and Abyss hits the ropes and tries to shoulder block Steiner, but he shakes his head and points to the ropes for Abyss to try again. Abyss hits the ropes and comes back with a big boot! Steiner staggers and Abyss follows up with a big lariat. Abyss scurries over to his trash can and pulls out a baseball bat! Steiner gets to his knees only to eat a baseball bat to the gut! Abyss follows up with another shot to the back, sending Steiner down to the mat. Abyss goes for another blow but Steiner catches the bat! He kicks Abyss in the knee, then turns the bad and jabs it into the monster's groin! Abyss crumples as Steiner gets to his feet and drops down, jabbing the bat into Abyss's chest! Steiner tosses the bat to the side and picks Abyss up, then hits an exploder into the corner! He picks up the monster and sets him on the top turnbuckle. Steiner climbs up...is he going for the frankensteiner?!?!
Abyss quickly regains his bearings while Steiner is getting set up and shoves him off, sending him flying to the mat!. Abyss hits a diving elbow drop! He goes for the pin: 1....2...Steiner gets a shoudler off the mat! Abyss gets frustrated and grabs the trash can full of weapons then just throws it on Steiner! Various blunt objects and implements of pain spill out over the mat. Abyss hits a big boy senton on the prone Steiner, then goes for a pin: 1.....2... Steiner kicks out! Abyss stands up and delivers a kick to Steiner's face. The Monster steps back towards the pile of weapons and picks up a bag and opens it, smiling at Steiner as he spills thumbtacks out over the mat. Abyss grabs Steiner in a front facelock, trying to lift him up for a suplex but Steiner blocks it! Steiner reverses and picks up Abyss, then hits the drop suplex right onto the thumbtacks! Abyss writhes in pain as they pierce his flesh! Both men are gassed by this point, Steiner stumbling to the weapons.
He picks up the baseball bat and throws it at Abyss, then follows up by chucking a fire extinguisher at him! The monster groans and writhes around in pain trying to get to his feet as Steiner comes over with a Singapore cane! He cracks the Monster multiple times, then turns to the crowd and flexes. Abyss is bleeding badly from the thumbtacks and has a head wound from the cane! Steiner yells "IT'S loving OVER!" Steiner picks Abyss up and locks his arms around the Monster's neck, holding the Singapore for additional force. STEINER FLATLINER! Steiner quickly climbs on the Monster's back and puts him in the Steiner Recliner, using the Singapore cane for extra leverage to choke Abyss! Abyss screams and waves his arms, but resistance to Big Poppa Pump is ultimately futile. Abyss taps out, Steiner is your winner!
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The camera cuts backstage to show Bischoff moving as the Doctors watch the match on a TV. "Jesus, he's going to need multiple stitches. Someone get a suture tray.." Suddenly, the camera pans to Bischoff. His eyes flutter open as he takes a few raspy breaths. One of the nurses looks up "Doctor, the Patient seems to be waking up!" The medical team rushes to Bischoff's bedside as he makes some sort of muffled noise. It's almost impossible to tell with the breathing tube in place. The doctors quickly pull out the tube as one of the nurses rubs a moist sponge in and around Bischoff's mouth. He takes a deep gasp and starts....laughing? Bischoff is laughing! The entire team stands in stunned silence as Bischoff starts tearing out his IV tubes and EKG/EEG monitors. "What the gently caress?" one of them mutters as Bischoff gets out of bed and stumbles, his legs weak from atrophy. He slowly crawls to a crate on wheels and pulls himself up, using the crate to scoot along. The medical team watches in silence as Bischoff makes his way slowly down the hallway.
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Alright folks, it's time for the main event! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkbKAp3YTgw Jeff Jarrett comes down to the ring with his signature guitar, talking poo poo to the crowd the entire way. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCF9-FvaR7k Sting comes out, wearing the title and carrying his baseball bat. Both men wait in their corners for the introductions. "Ladies and Gentlemen, it's time for your main event. This match is for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship and is an Immortal Diamond Of Doom Death Match! Your challenger: from Nashville, Tennessee and weighing in at 229 pounds...Jeff Jarrett! And your champion: from Every Man's Nightmare, weighing in at 250 pounds...STING!" Sting raises his bat high and stares down Jarrett. Both men move towards the center of the ring and the ref rings the bell. This match is on! Both men go in for a collar and elbow tie up. Sting ends up with a wrist lock, wrenching Jarrett's arm as he gets the leverage. Jarrett reverses into a wrist lock of his own, then puts Sting in a headlock. Sting sends Jarret into the ropes, then hits a dropkick catching Jarrett on the rebound! Sting goes for a quick pin: 1...Jarret kicks out!
Sting picks Jarret up and hits him with a vicious knife edge chop! Jarrett returns the favor! Both men exchange chops then Sting tosses Jarrett into the corner and goes for a Stinger Splash but no one's home! Sting hits the top turnbuckle and staggers back. Jarrett goes for thequick schoolboy roll up: 1....Sting kicks out! Both men go at each other with some vicious forearms, then Sting goes for an Irish Whip but Jarrett reverses into a swinging neckbreaker! Sting sits up only to eat a shotgun dropkick from Jarrett! Jarrett quickly moves in for a crossface but Sting reverses the hold into a sleeper! Jarrett refuses to submit! He gets a hand in under Sting's arm and breaks out of the hold, both men scrambling to their feet. Jarrett comes in for a short arm lariat but Sting ducks and catches Jarrett underneath the chin, readying for the Scorpion Death Drop! Jarrett turns the hold over and tries for the Stroke! Sting stops the leg sweep but gets a knee to the gut and a powerbomb for his efforts! Jarrett goes for the pin: 1...2... Sting kicks out! Jarret potatoes Sting with a vicious uppercut then hits him with a scoop powerslam and quickly locks in a figure four! Sting fights back in obvious pain and manages to turn the hold over and reverse the pressure! Jarret releases and scrambles away, going for his guitar. Sting kicks him in the ribs, then picks up and irish whips Jarrett into the corner and follows up with a Stinger splash! Jarrett staggers out and Sting hits an inverted atomic drop, freezing Jarrett in his tracks. Sting hits the ropes and goes for a slingshot crossbody! Sting hooks the leg for a pin: 1....2... Jarrett kicks out!
Sting quickly gets Jarrett up and pops him with a right hand, but Jarrett retaliates with a kick to the ding ding! Sting doubles over and Jarrett retrieves his guitar and cracks the Champion over the head! Jarrett struts his stuff around the ring, celebrating his forthcoming victory! We may have a new champion, folks! Jarrett goes for the pin: 1.....2...STING KICKS OUT!! Sting is battered, his facepaint smeared from the guitar shot but he struggles to his feet. Jarrett seems exasperated, pulling Sting up for a suplex but Sting blocks with his leg! He unleashes a vicious knife edge chop to Jarrett's throat! Jarrett's face goes red as he staggers back, giving Sting an opening for a powerbomb! Sting goes for the prawn cover...no he grabs Jarrett's legs and puts him in the Scorpion Death Lock! Jarrett fights but can't hold on and taps! STING RETAINS!
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The ref hands Sting the title and he holds it high, drinking in the cheers of the crowd. His victory celebration is suddently interrupted as Immortal comes streaming down the ramp and come towards the ring. Suddenly, Bischoff's music hits! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0oSqS-M1LYA Bischoff stumbles out of the entrance way onto the ramp, blood dripping down his arms from tearing out his IV tubes. He screams something but the microphones are not able to catch it. All the members of Immortal are in complete shock as Sting slips away through the crowd. This has been Hardcore Justice folks, see you on Impact!
Apologies it took so long, had to write up the bulk of it on my own. Shout out to Senerio for giving us a hand and writing the Bully Ray-Shelley match and Junpei for writing the Knockouts match. Not Bad for our first PPV!
Pinche Rudo fucked around with this message at 07:28 on Feb 17, 2017
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