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hashashash
Nov 2, 2016

Cure for cancer discovered!
Court physicians hate him!

HannibalBarca posted:

a cruel twist of fate that you set "do not blob" as one of your RP commandments and then got a ruler who came of age possessed by Shaitan and wanting to conquer the world :v:

Not to mention the 37 martial score. Jeez.

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Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



This LP is off to a GREAT start.

sullat
Jan 9, 2012
One of the witches has a 37 intrigue score, I suppose there will be a lot of escaped snakes in the future. St. Patrick didn't drive them out, Morgana brought them with her to Spain.

Deceitful Penguin
Feb 16, 2011
You better marry the witches. Have the high intrigue one be the primary, as otherwise she'll end up the primary one anyway~

PurpleXVI
Oct 30, 2011

Spewing insults, pissing off all your neighbors, betraying your allies, backing out of treaties and accords, and generally screwing over the global environment?
ALL PART OF MY BRILLIANT STRATEGY!
This is an AWESOME start to the LP.

HAIL IBLIS

Herr Tog
Jun 18, 2011

Grimey Drawer
I love this lp. are those witches an actual event and you just get them?

Deceitful Penguin
Feb 16, 2011

Herr Tog posted:

I love this lp. are those witches an actual event and you just get them?
The Witches are part of the "Child of Satan" event that he rolled; that's why his character is so rad and these things are happening.

It's pretty rare, tbh. I've rolled it once legit and I have hundreds of hours in the game.

GenderSelectScreen
Mar 7, 2010

I DON'T KNOW EITHER DON'T ASK ME
College Slice
The only time I've ever gotten the Child of Satan chain was when I was playing as an Iberian sultan as well.

hashashash
Nov 2, 2016

Cure for cancer discovered!
Court physicians hate him!
Yeah, I genuinely didn't expect it, the only reason I even got it was because I had to restart a couple times because the first character kept dying from a cold or something without an heir.

The whole Satan thing is pretty awesome though, I've never gotten it before, so I'm learning all kinds of cool stuff.

Herr Tog
Jun 18, 2011

Grimey Drawer

Hashim posted:

Yeah, I genuinely didn't expect it, the only reason I even got it was because I had to restart a couple times because the first character kept dying from a cold or something without an heir.

The whole Satan thing is pretty awesome though, I've never gotten it before, so I'm learning all kinds of cool stuff.

may the great satan control the strait forever

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

I've gotten Satan 3 times. The first time I didn't know what was happening and killed the kid after his first sibling died because I was afraid of where poo poo might go.

Kept his wet nurse as my religious advisor for decades.

GunnerJ
Aug 1, 2005

Do you think this is funny?

Hashim posted:

Not to mention the 37 martial score. Jeez.

Look, this is clearly a sign from Iblis that a little bit of blobbing is acceptable.

Lustful Man Hugs
Jul 18, 2010

This is the best thing ever.

Rody One Half
Feb 18, 2011

GunnerJ posted:

Look, this is clearly a sign from Iblis that a little bit of blobbing is acceptable.

Then iblis needs to break up some other blobs to make room

Deceitful Penguin
Feb 16, 2011
Yeah, even though you missed the first shot at huge event armies, the martial will still give you insane levies and certain other problems you might get from repeated combat encounters are, less worrisome for a spawn of Satan.

It's too bad you're in the wrong part of the Islamic world if your real dad decides to convince you of certain things though, but seeing as that would put you in the middle of the Seljuk emirate, that uhh, might be for the best. Be aware you should blob modestly just in case bad things happen; you might become a serious target in the near future.

Though if Satan now sends you to Ireland, it wouldn't be amiss~

CommissarMega
Nov 18, 2008

THUNDERDOME LOSER
Man, I've always wanted an Islamic paradox LP, but I never expected it'd turn out like this :v: Oh well, if there's anyone more suited to a Re-Reconquista, it's someone with 37 Martial!

Drone
Aug 22, 2003

Incredible machine
:smug:


The Child of Satan event chain is just so much goddamn fun though. My first and most notable time getting it, I was the King of Scotland and Ireland, and the event fired on my youngest daughter. While still less than 8 years old, she murdered all of my other heirs (including an adult son), and then I passed away of old age conveniently as England went into a civil war. The new Hellqueen of Scotland-Ireland declared war immediately, aided by an army led by our three witches, and established a dark Britannic Empire to surely last a thousand years.

I ended the game when she hit age 99 and was still healthy, because nothing will ever top that. In my headcanon she reigns to this day as dread queen of all.

Luhood
Nov 13, 2012
Interestingly Al-Andalus is one of those places I keep coming back to. I'll be off somewhere else playing the Vikings or whatever, then decide I want to do yet another Al-Andalus game. I'll be playing the Dutch in EU4, only to suddenly want to give Granada yet another go. The only games of EU4 and CK2 I've ever finished was as Al-Andalus, albeit with using the old EU4+ mod to get a somewhat better start. But I digress!

Off to a good start I see! May Iblis show you the true path to glory or whatever else it is you seek. Or just, y'know, not being eaten by your neighbours! :v:

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



Drone posted:

The Child of Satan event chain is just so much goddamn fun though. My first and most notable time getting it, I was the King of Scotland and Ireland, and the event fired on my youngest daughter. While still less than 8 years old, she murdered all of my other heirs (including an adult son), and then I passed away of old age conveniently as England went into a civil war. The new Hellqueen of Scotland-Ireland declared war immediately, aided by an army led by our three witches, and established a dark Britannic Empire to surely last a thousand years.

I ended the game when she hit age 99 and was still healthy, because nothing will ever top that. In my headcanon she reigns to this day as dread queen of all.

Please tell me her patronym was Macbeth.

A Festivus Miracle
Dec 19, 2012

I have come to discourse on the profound inequities of the American political system.

On the flipside of the Satan event, my devil child ended up being the victim of an assassination plot led by a loving 25 intrigue duke I had. I was so mad I killed his entire family.

oath2order
Oct 12, 2013

It's MAGIC. I don't have to explain shit!


A White Guy posted:

On the flipside of the Satan event, my devil child ended up being the victim of an assassination plot led by a loving 25 intrigue duke I had. I was so mad I killed his entire family.

That duke is the protagonist of someone else's grimdark fantasy novel.

hashashash
Nov 2, 2016

Cure for cancer discovered!
Court physicians hate him!
Chapter 3 - The Son of Iblis - 1086 to 1106


1087 opens with disaster in the Holy Land. After five years of religious warfare and holy fury, Basileus Konstantios of the Eastern Roman Empire strode into Jerusalem at the head of an army, having decisively defeated the Fatimid Caliph on the drenched battlefields of Palestine.



With his Shia rival humiliated, the Sunni Caliph decided to capitalise on his weakness by promoting his own legitimacy, calling on all true Muslims to take up arms against the infidel in a public sermon.



Meanwhile, in Western Europe, the other half of the Roman Empire was in the midst of its own wars. After seizing the throne and forcing the Pope to crown him Emperor, Manfredo the Italian embarked on an ambitious campaign to destroy the Norwegian Empire, his biggest threat and rival within Catholicism.



And after a series of stunning victories in Saxony and Denmark, Emperor Manfredo managed to defeat his rivals, leaving the north embroiled in peasant uprisings and widespread rebellions. The High King of Norway-England was killed during the chaos, and his only living son, Lodin, was forced to flee to London to escape the wrath of his enemies, abandoning most of his Scandinavian holdings as he did so.



Finally, back on the Iberian peninsula, the Aftasid Sultanate is steadily expanding both northward and eastwards, at the expense of the Christian principalities. The Sultanate grows stronger by the day and seems destined to dominate all of Hispania, unless a power rises to challenge them.

And that is exactly what the Sheikh of Cádiz, Az’ar Jizrunid, intends to do. He had thus far rocketed to dominate Iberian politics, with rumours about his notorious cruelty and battlefield brilliance becoming court gossip, but Azar's eyes were set on the future. After defeating the Abbadid Emir, Sheikh Az’ar returned to his court to begin planning his next war, but with him he brought the seeds of trouble and unrest.

News that Az'ar had brought back three heathen women was immediately met with anger across Cádiz, though most prominently from the clergy. It wasn't unusual that a sheikh or emir might have foreign women as part of his harem, but it was forbidden for a Muslim to lie with a pagan, and there were dark stories about these three women in particular. After consulting his colleagues, the head of the ulema, Imam Mubashir, informed Sheikh Az’ar that the women would have to be exiled, such was the will of Allah.

Nobody seemed to understand that Az’ar didn’t care for the will of Allah, however, his prayers were directed to a different being altogether.



Az’ar, however, went even further than this. Just days after returning to court, the Sheikh announced to his courtiers and retainers that he intended to marry the three women, once again drawing criticism and anger from an infuriated clergy.

And that he did, the very next morning. Az'ar wedded Jezebel and Circe in a widely-publicised ceremony, and though he was unable to officially marry Morgana without breaking yet more Quranic laws, the two were undoubtedly involved with one another behind closed doors.



In fact, Az’ar went a step beyond simply infuriating his clergy, he seemed to be openly defying the law of Allah when he awarded his new wives with high-ranking positions and honours. They were all given places on the Sheikh’s Council, making the displaced viziers instant enemies of Az’ar.



There were immediate repercussions, with officers and soldiers in Azar’s army outright refusing to serve a woman, and an infidel woman at that. Rumours of corruption on Circe’s part became widespread, but Az’ar dismissed them all as attempts to besmirch her reputation.



Eventually, after realising their protests were being ignored, a few commanders escaped the capital and raised an army in revolt, proclaiming that the three women had bewitched Az’ar, and that the only way to be rid of the curse was to kill them all.



Az’ar, needless to say, was not impressed. The army his former commanders raised was surprisingly large, but it was also made up of retired soldiers and untrained peasants, so he was certain they would make a poor showing when it came to battle.



That said, Az’ar wasn’t one to shy away from the prospect of a fight, he relished any opportunity that allowed him to wet his blade. So he called on the veterans of his recent war to help him squash the revolt, and after a short march and a shorter battle, the rebels were wiped out.

Even better, in the midst of all the fighting, Az’ar had been able to corner the leader of the revolt - a former mercenary by the name of Mundir. After disarming him in the short struggle that followed, Az’ar ordered his men to put him in chains, intending to march him back to Cádiz to face his wives.



Azar’s victorious return to Cádiz, however, was not met with cheering this time. Instead, the palace was in a state of mourning, with every courtier terrified as to what the Sheikh would do, once word of what happened finally reached him.



Apparently, just days after Az’ar left Cádiz to engage the rebels, Morgana had been found dead in her rooms. There were no signs of injuries on her, but the other two witches convinced the Sheikh that she had been assassinated, probably by way of some obscure poison.

Az’ar, of course, was devastated, and the only way he had ever been able to deal with pain was to inflict it on others. The rebel leader, Mundir, suffered through weeks of torture before Azar’s anger was sated, enduring countless hours of mutilation.



Allah seemed to be out to set an example of his own. A few weeks after Morgana’s death, Azar’s long-awaited first child was finally born, a son by Circe. Az’ar, as any ruler would, had become obsessed with raising an heir of his own, so he had been ecstatic when he heard the news. Unfortunately, however, illness took the newborn boy just hours after he came into the world, cutting short Azar's joy.



Understandably, after two crushing deaths in such quick succession, Az’ar became desperate to escape from his house of death. Luckily, an excuse to get away from Cádiz came up not long after, with word reaching the palace that Caliph Muqtadi in Baghdad had called for a Great Jihad against the Byzantine Empire.



Az’ar didn’t care much for holy wars, but he pounced on the chance to get away from Cádiz, and perhaps earn a reputation abroad. His council warned him against joining the Jihad, however, on the basis that the distance would be too great a barrier, but the Sheikh simply waved away any concerns and continued his preparations.

Thus, late in 1095, Sheikh Az’ar set out for the Levant with 4000 men-at-arms.



It took only a week for Az’ar to realise he’d made a grievous mistake. The costs of ship reparations, food stores, sail cloth, material upkeep and physical labour were staggering, and within mere days of launching the campaign, Sheikh Az’ar found himself teetering on the edge of bankruptcy.

Nevertheless, he managed to somehow reach Acre in January of 1096, only to be dealt another cruel hand. Basileus Konstantinos had proven himself a gifted commander, defeating the Muslim forces in a series of decisive battles before capturing the Caliph himself, bringing the Jihad to a sudden end.



So, as a new century approaches, Az’ar found himself a continent away from Cádiz and without the means of getting back. As his budget went red, he was forced to disband the army, scatter his forces and use the remaining funds to somehow make his way back to Cádiz. Needless to say, the expedition had ended in utter failure.

Even worse, whilst docking at Tunis for supplies, the Sheikh was caught in the midst of disease sweeping through the region. He was rushed back to Cádiz with all the haste of the wind, but by then any hope of a full recovery was dashed, and his Court Physician was forced to work with what was left of him.



Thus, the brilliant and notorious Sheikh Az’ar returned to Cádiz in humiliation, a cursed cripple with neither an army nor any money. This, the Sheikh was convinced, was surely his lowest point.

The first thing he did upon returning to Cádiz was go to Circe, who had quickly become his favourite (and primary) wife. The witch was understandably shocked at the sight that met her, Az’ar was almost unrecognisable, poor where he’d once been rich, broken where he’d once been strong, and defeated when he’d once stood proud. He was the picture of pity.

She took him into her chambers, and though no one knows what happened between them in those next few hours, evil was certainly worked in those rooms. There were whispers that the witch would sing in demonic music late into the night, and that a harsh, guttural voice would rumble in reply... and when the doors were thrust open once more, Az’ar strode out of the room, but he was not the same man who’d staggered through them just a week past. His body was whole once more.



The nobles, clergymen and scholars took this 'recovery' with a healthy dose of scepticism, but there is no doubt that Az'ar had suddenly returned to his determined and ambitious former self, with the Sheikh immediately drawing up plans to invade the neighbouring Emirate of Granada.

After revealing these plans, however, the clergy outright refused to sanction the invasion, with Imam Mubashir claiming that Sheikh Az’ar had the devil in him. He wasn’t far wrong, and Azar's courtiers began picking up oddities, such as the fact that their Sheikh didn't eat much, or that he spent more nights awake than not, or that he never seemed to laugh or smile. Soon enough, many began whispering that the Sheikh’s miraculous recovery had been bought with the most valuable of Allah’s creations: his soul.



Az’ar, however, had long grown accustomed to such rumours, and simply brushed them off. After the Court Imam refused to preach for war, the Sheikh was forced to resort to more primitive methods: namely, having his viziers falsify documents and claims to lands held by Granada.

Once these documents were ready, Sheikh Az’ar wasted no time in declaring on his neighbour, anxious to feel the rush that came with battle after so long a drought.



It had been quite a while since he’d last marched to war, but the barracks and military schools throughout Cádiz were kept in good working condition throughout the years of peace, so Az’ar was able to quickly muster his levies and merge them into a large army.

Once fully gathered, the Sheikh set out to meet the Granadan army, which had been recalled from another conflict to defend the Emirate's southern borders. The two armies clashed not far from Cádiz, and Az’ar was able to showcase his unique martial ability once again, surrounding and crushing large parts of the enemy in a series of brilliant manoeuvres, ending the battle with more than 3000 dead or captured foes.



Emir Tamim of Granada was forced to lead a chaotic retreat, with Azar’s forces in close pursuit, constantly raiding and harrying at their supply trains. He managed to pin down the bulk of Tamim's army near Algeciras, crushing it once again.



The Emir himself was able to escape the slaughter, but Az’ar pressed close on his heels, chasing Tamim and his escort back to Malaga. The fortress was put under siege, and after a few attempted wall-scalings, Az’ar resigned himself to the fact that he wouldn't be able to pierce its strong fortifications, instead opting to surround it and simply starve it into submission.

The months quickly slipped past, and as the situation inside Malaga became increasingly desperate, Az’ar was able to bargain with the defenders and secure their surrender. In return for promises of clemency and the guaranteed survival of Emir Tamim, the gates of Malaga were finally opened to Sheikh Az'ar.



Az’ar is not the sort of man to hold to a promise, however, and he let his army loose on the city within moments of entering it. Malaga was brutally sacked over the course of the night, with no man, woman or child safe from the frustrated Cádizians.



Emir Tamim was captured whilst attempting to escape and brought to Az'ar in chains, but once he signed a treaty ceding Malaga and a few nearby cities, he was allowed to leave in relative safety. That is to say, with a couple new scars and a pronounced limp.

And with that, the small but notorious Sheikh Az’ar expands his dominion once more, but he’s certainly not done. At the encouragement of Circe, he’s determined to build a realm worthy of challenging the Aftasid Sultanate to the north and the Almoravids to the south, though only time can tell whether the so-called Son of Iblis can evade his inevitable fate long enough to achieve it.


hashashash fucked around with this message at 18:27 on Dec 17, 2018

Mr.Morgenstern
Sep 14, 2012

So.

The HRE controls Norway.

Huh.

And is it me or is there a gigantic Kiev to the east of Europe?

NewMars
Mar 10, 2013

Mr.Morgenstern posted:

So.

The HRE controls Norway.

Huh.

And is it me or is there a gigantic Kiev to the east of Europe?

Well, here's hoping Mega-HRE doesn't become a thing.

Deceitful Penguin
Feb 16, 2011
Man, that was some impressive up-fuckery, though you were rather hamstrung by the fact that the Muslim CBs require piety to work properly.

What a shame. You might have to swear fealty and eat that dude from the inside now to make it through.

NewMars posted:

Well, here's hoping Mega-HRE doesn't become a thing.
I'm rather curious how they got the claimant.

PurpleXVI
Oct 30, 2011

Spewing insults, pissing off all your neighbors, betraying your allies, backing out of treaties and accords, and generally screwing over the global environment?
ALL PART OF MY BRILLIANT STRATEGY!
Dang, does Satan really give you Wolverine-like regeneration abilities? Awesome.

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



PurpleXVI posted:

Dang, does Satan really give you Wolverine-like regeneration abilities? Awesome.

I know I'd worship him!

hashashash
Nov 2, 2016

Cure for cancer discovered!
Court physicians hate him!

Mr.Morgenstern posted:

So.

The HRE controls Norway.

Huh.

And is it me or is there a gigantic Kiev to the east of Europe?

Yep, they've expanded like crazy:



The Seljuks have also been warring like there's no tomorrow:



Also, in a little twist, Brittany seems to have inherited the Kingdom of Navarre:




Deceitful Penguin posted:

What a shame. You might have to swear fealty and eat that dude from the inside now to make it through.

If I get a craven or content character, and am declared on by a more powerful kingdom, then I'll probably swear fealty to the closest power that'll have me. But Az'ar, by my own roleplaying rules, won't be doing it anytime soon, even if he's defeated in battle.

Rubix Squid
Apr 17, 2014
Clearly Az'ar should invent his own religion so he can declare himself pious. The guy's already seen how strongly a motivating factor religion can be and his leg just miraculously healed.

Deceitful Penguin
Feb 16, 2011
If only Satan could have you switch religion groups rather than just to heresies; alas.

I guess they shoulda had the Voice of Satan modifier give you plus piety if you're muslim to counter this, but thems the breaks.

mythomanic
Aug 19, 2009
Yesss I always need more Paradox LPs to follow. This is looking real good so far; I'm glad you're doing CK2+. I think it adds a lot of interesting stuff to the game, not the least of which are wilder heresies. Does it convert over to EU4 pretty well these days? Or are you going to do a full on Ofaloaf-style mod conversion?

hashashash
Nov 2, 2016

Cure for cancer discovered!
Court physicians hate him!

mythomanic posted:

Yesss I always need more Paradox LPs to follow. This is looking real good so far; I'm glad you're doing CK2+. I think it adds a lot of interesting stuff to the game, not the least of which are wilder heresies. Does it convert over to EU4 pretty well these days? Or are you going to do a full on Ofaloaf-style mod conversion?

Unfortunately, I'm nowhere near as good as Ofaloaf at converting, so I'm not going to go all-out. I'll use the converter, then edit all the provinces/cultures/religions and stuff by hand, to make it a bit more realistic and easier on the eyes.

hashashash
Nov 2, 2016

Cure for cancer discovered!
Court physicians hate him!
Chapter 4 – Descent into Madness – 1106 to 1123


The opening decade of the twelfth century brought dramatic changes to the political landscape of the Iberian peninsula. In the West, the Aftasid Sultanate began suffering from the constant wars and overextension, with a few emirs going so far as to declare independence. In the East, meanwhile, a Christian challenger to Aftasid dominance emerged in the form of the King Tello of Aragon, fresh from his conquest of the Duchy of Barcelona. King Tello then went on to declare his intention to reconquer the lost Christian principalities of Léon and Galicia.



Sultan Yahya responded to this by immediately offering alliances to the other Muslim taifas, pulling them into his sphere of influence under the guise of protection. When the same offer was extended to Cádiz, however, Sheikh Az’ar simply scoffed, he was as determined as ever to carve out his own little piece of Iberia.



Az’ar was no fool, however, and he knew that being surrounded by three hostile powers put him in a very dangerous position. So he eventually dispatched a small party of diplomats to the Almoravid capital of Marrakesh, where they negotiated a non-aggression pact between Cádiz and Morocco, bolstered with an arranged marriage between Sultan Umar and Wahida, Azar's half-sister.



Once his southern flank was secure, the Sheikh turned to inward development. First, determined to transform Cádiz into a distinct cultural hub, the Sheikh formally adopted a golden field as the colours of his dynasty, raising a shimmering golden banner above the parapets and minarets of Cádiz.



Next, eager to expand his army in preparation for war. When he proposed drafting laws to increase manpower to his Council, however, Az’ar found the clergy blocking him once again. The court imam refused to ratify any laws put forward by the Sheikh, and Az’ar could not act against the ulema without turning the entire sheikhdom against him.



So, rather than fight a battle he could not win, Az’ar decided on a different strategy. He used the riches he’d accumulated in his wars to construct training grounds, where he hoped to build a disciplined, organised force capable of defeating much larger armies.



Az’ar planned to incite another border conflict between himself and the Abbadid Emirate, which he would use as an excuse to seize a few castles and cities, so he began organising raids into neighbouring enemy country. Az’ar himself led many of the raids, plundering and burning towns deep in Abbadid territory, attacking under his golden banners so that the Emir knew who they were.

Before the raids could escalate into full-on invasions, however, disaster struck Cádiz.



Circe, the last of the three witches who Az'ar had become so attached to, was found dead not long after the Sheikh had left the capital. Her maids discovered her in her baths, with the water stained red, her throat slit.

Az’ar, upon receiving the news, immediately called off the raids and rushed back to Cádiz. After seeing Circe’s dead body for himself, he descended into a mad craze, distraught with grief. It was in the midst of this craze that he commanded his guards to arrest two of his other wives, along with all their maids and attendants and retainers.



Once his wives were brought to him in chains, Sheikh Az’ar began questioning them ruthlessly, reducing them to tears within minutes. Az’ar had no pity for them, he was convinced that their jealousy of Circe had led to her death, and he was determined to find the assassin.

So they were tortured, mercilessly tormented in ways a human mind could never conjure, abused and harassed for hours without end. After just three days, the two women were nigh unrecognisable, little more than husks of their former selves.



Eventually, after weeks of torture and with nothing to show for it, a furious Az’ar had them executed. They may have had nothing to do with Circe’s assassination, but Az’ar didn’t much care at that point, he was set on the course of destruction.



This episode of madness was not contained within Cádiz, however, and word of Azar’s cruelty quickly spread to the surrounding provinces and cities. Many of his own vassals publicly denounced their Sheikh, with the clergy and Court Imam condeming the ‘Son of Iblis’, no doubt please by this turn of events.



Even Azar’s own viziers, who were supposed to be his allies through thick and thin, were mortified at the Sheikh’s reaction to Circe’s death. Many broke off their ties with him, and some took a more opposed stance, even resigning from the council.



Thus, suddenly faced with enemies and assassins in every corner and behind every curtain, it isn’t surprising that Sheikh Az’ar began to become more paranoid.



He eventually decided to launch a preemptive strike, hoping to ward of any assassins or rebellions by kidnapping his most powerful vassal: Wali Abbas. After imprisoning the governor, Az’ar had him dragged through the streets of Cádiz, before blinding him in full view of his own populace.

To those within the Sheikhdom of Cádiz, it must have seemed as though Az’ar had lost his mind.



Contrary to his hopes, however, attempts on the Sheikh’s life began to increase, though Az’ar was able to escape from many of them without so much as a scratch, using his wide spy network to discover the plots before they were set in motion.

Despite this, Az’ar continued abducting and torturing his political enemies, forcing his more passive vassals into line through fear alone. He even began designing sick torture devices, the most prominent of which was the brazen bull, which he used to execute countless wazirs and walis.



The only ally that Az’ar had in this storm was, unusually, his Court Physician: Abdul-Razzaq. The physician used the victims of Azar’s gruesome poisons to advance his own knowledge on human anatomy, and he would go on to publish a book that would quickly become the groundwork of medical practice throughout Europe and the Middle East.



As the weeks stretched into months, and the months into years, Azar’s mental health steadily declined. Eerily reminiscent to his father, Sheikh Az’ar turned to drink to numb his pain, and quickly grew dependent on the bottle.

Madness and alcohol do not go well together, however, and this resulted in several… embarrassing events, to say the least. The Sheikh began to think of himself as a wolf-monster, and he would spend hours howling at the moon or bounding through the rain on all fours.



In more extreme cases, however, Azar’s maidservants would find him sticky with blood, not far from a lifeless body or two.



By 1123, the situation in Cádiz had become untenable. Sheikh Azar’s vassals were continuously plotting his murder, his wives feared for their lives, and his servants and slaves had become objects of his torture.

In the middle of Ramadan, Azar’s death finally arrived, a blessing to many in Cádiz. The official reason for his demise was that his heart gave out, and that isn’t far from the truth, with one of his harem-women claiming that he collapsed on her mid-deed. It is far more likely that she was bribed to slip Sheikh Az’ar one of his poisons, however, and nobody could fault her for it.



Even before the news had escaped the palace, the viziers of the Council quickly swept into power. With no children to survive him, Azar’s nephew was installed as his successor, with the viziers hoping that a familiar figure would maintain order and prevent the secession of border provinces.



Masud, however, is just five years of age. This means that Cádiz will be without a Sheikh, figurehead or otherwise, for at least another decade. And as the Aftasid Sultanate expands in the West and the Kingdom of Aragon grows in the East, it isn’t difficult to realise that unless a strong Sheikh comes to power soon, there is a real risk of Cádiz being torn between the two great powers.



hashashash fucked around with this message at 18:48 on Oct 8, 2018

Mr.Morgenstern
Sep 14, 2012

Rip Iblis.

He conquered one province.

hashashash
Nov 2, 2016

Cure for cancer discovered!
Court physicians hate him!
2, but yeah. As it turns out, piety is pretty important.

PurpleXVI
Oct 30, 2011

Spewing insults, pissing off all your neighbors, betraying your allies, backing out of treaties and accords, and generally screwing over the global environment?
ALL PART OF MY BRILLIANT STRATEGY!
How much of that trouble was the game throwing poo poo at you for having the hugest negative piety humanly possible, and how much of it was you roleplaying rather than picking optimal choices?

Angry Lobster
May 16, 2011

Served with honor
and some clarified butter.
RIP Sheik Az’ar.

May he roam in his father's realm for all eternity.

hashashash
Nov 2, 2016

Cure for cancer discovered!
Court physicians hate him!

PurpleXVI posted:

How much of that trouble was the game throwing poo poo at you for having the hugest negative piety humanly possible, and how much of it was you roleplaying rather than picking optimal choices?

I generally went with whatever fit the narrative, but it could have turned out very differently. For example, if Circe hadn't died and my drat chancellor could get me a claim, then Az'ar would have gone on a conquering spree and maybe build a kingdom worthy of challenging the Aftasids and Aragon. Even if I didn't get the claim, Az'ar probably wouldn't have done much after torturing and executing his wives (which I did because he had the cruel and impaler traits). But because the game handed me the paranoid trait, I figured Az'ar would start lashing out at his vassals too, so that's what I did, which led to his other vassals getting riled up even more.

So basically, a few random events and a lot of roleplaying is what dictates the narrative, and thus the game.

theblastizard
Nov 5, 2009
What a waste of a perfectly good Satan.

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CommissarMega
Nov 18, 2008

THUNDERDOME LOSER
Such are the rewards of sin :colbert:

EDIT: So this wouldn't be a completely useless post, what do Muslims get in exchange for piety being a necessary component for war? I mean, personally I'm genuinely pleased that in CK Islam doesn't allow for the minions of Iblis to screw around, but from a gameplay perspective losing such a competent commander can really put a crimp in your conquest that Christians don't have to suffer*.

*At least, not this side of the afterlife :unsmigghh:

CommissarMega fucked around with this message at 22:13 on Jan 8, 2017

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