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Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Oh, this looks fun. You really do need to make Malaga your top priority though, it'll pretty up your borders nicely

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Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Ugh, this event. And it's always a valuable wife I that ends up doing it, too. Which alliance are you about to lose?

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Luhood posted:

Alas, poor Norwegian England. We hardly knew ye.

Jorvik's only one prepared invasion away from a comeback

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

The Jizrunids' corrupt blood, their greed, and their disregard for the laws of man and Allah have finally given rise to the inevitable! Yes, since the first of this accursed line seized Cadiz, their doom sealed, their fates written! One by one, they have been rejected by the Almighty, and even the intervention of Shaitan himself could not stop the fall of this dissolute dynasty! Now we seem defeated, divided, butchering each other for petty slights even as they rot alive: the end is near, and soon, Cadiz will be free of them.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Perhaps I was too hasty in condemning Emir Galind. As his doctors cut the weakness from his body, so he has cut the weakness out of his dynasty, finally understanding that no victory will come without sacrifice and preparation, even with the favor of Allah. The Aragonese must be driven from our cities, the crusaders from Portugal, and then all Christians from Iberia! And, if it is to be done, Cadiz must step to the forefront, sword in hand, ready to fight to the end!

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Is Shiek (Emir?) Musa a Jizrunid, or just from a random dynasty? He could be a problem in the future

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Well, at least it isn't another regency

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Hashim posted:

Yeah, the throne kinda landed in his lap. I'll go into more detail in the next chapter, but he was a bastard born to Sultan Fath, only legitimised a few weeks before his assassination. That makes him the son, brother and uncle of three different Sultans, all of whom died before their time. He's been chilling with a few counties he inherited ever since Fath's death, in 1245.

So he's already got money, prestige, and progeny? How loyal of a vassal has he been?

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Even when the Jizrunids win, they lose :(

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Should have gone for Sicily itself, but otherwise, thing have been going far too well for the Jizrunids.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Rodyle posted:

The borders!!!!

Yes, Leon and Castille need to be conquered for their own sake at this point. Put them out of their and our misery, clean it all it up.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

theblastizard posted:

I mean, if so many of your ancestors got their schlongs chopped off wouldn't you turn to the Dark Forces to protect your wang?

I mean the guys who've lost their dongs so far were either warmongers or weird cultists, so maybe the secret to avoiding that is being nice

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Is that Hungary-Lithuania I see?

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

HannibalBarca posted:

not bad for a guy with 7 martial

Yeah, when I read great general I wan't quite expecting a Kind, Gregarious Charismatic Negotiator

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Hashim posted:

Yeah, that actually sounds like a fantastic megacampaign. Of course, as tensions escalate a cold war will eventually develop between Aztec America and Muslim Europe, culminating in a devastating nuclear war and the end of all mankind.

So, Aztec Mad Max? That I want

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Soup du Jour posted:

This, please.

I'd be mourning Rum right alongside you guys, but having it get replaced with Iconoclasm is pretty neat to me. I don't think there's ever been an LP where it was a major force.

Well, if the pope doesn't try for one last (winnable) Crusade, that is.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

The real problems are the Balearic Islands and Corsica. C'mon, how are we going to get a Zuhriman for this Iberia without Corsica?

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Samovar posted:

When was it done? Is there a link?

Wiz's Hohenzollern lp, the Paradox ur-lp

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Rodyle posted:

I won't accept anything less than the total completion of the Deconquista.

:yeah:

Don't forget those French tendrils extending beyond the Pyrenees, those need to go.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Danny Glands posted:

Is our flag seriously going to be a field of lemon-yellow?

This is the flag that vanilla EU4 has for Andalusia, not sure how they came up with it, but decent-looking:

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

ninjahedgehog posted:

Haha what the hell is that based on? It's giving me an idea for my next CK2 game though.

Tigranes claimed the Shahanshah title, so maybe that?

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

1. B
2. A
3. B
4. A
5. C

Let's burn it all down.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



It is only the New Taifas that can hope to lead Al Andalus to the glory she deserves! What can the priests do but inspire our armies? What can the merchants do, but take advantage of our victories? They, and all of Al Andalus, are nothing without us, lost to the rabid tide of the Franks!

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



I, Qasim al-Cyrahzax of the glorious and unopposable Taifas, propose that we focus our efforts in annexation on the three westernmost Christian kingdoms of Iberia: Portugal, Galicia and Leon.

These realms are the weakest of our neighbors and the most vulnerable to direct military force: we must crush them before greater Christian kingdoms, France especially, decide to interfere with them. Every Christian king in Iberia is threat and a wild card- it's intolerable!

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012


allah preserve me :allears:

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



I'm pleased by the amount of support my proposal is getting, but I also think we of the New Taifas are still missing a critical element of our platform: the army itself. While the naval proposal is admirable in its intent, we need to deal with more immediate problems: the northern kingdoms and France, and only an army will be capable of that. So:

I, Qasim al-Cyrahzax of the New Taifas, propose that beyond expansion and maintenance, Al-Andalus should put the majority of its economic and administrative resources into the enlargement and improvement of our standing army.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



Perhaps demanding specific wars is too shortsighted? None of us knows what the future holds, what problems and opportunities may come, so:

I, Qasim al-Cyrahzax of the enlightened and victorious Taifas, propose that we attack whichever Christian kingdom is weakest and most isolated, with particular attention being paid towards conflicts between them. The goal of these invasions is nothing less than complete annexation for each and every one of them, no matter how many wars it takes.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

the JJ posted:

Fine. I modify my proposal to better fit the mood of the taifas. I propose we turbofuck any state that has the temerity to settle our rightful land before we get around to it.

I want my summer island drat it.

You know that France and Aragon are squatting on our islands in the Mediterranean, yes? You can have your summer home when you kill a few knights for it!

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



French dogs! They will pay for these humiliations when we drive their puppets beyond the Pyrenees, but there are others we should be blaming for this disaster: the League of Merchants and the Ulama! They waste Al-Andalus's time and resources with vanity projects when they should have been supporting our army! What use are marketplaces and mayors that only know how drone on about Allah compared to bigger and better army?

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



Ah, I like this new sultan. He understands, as all of you should, that the New Taifas are Al-Andalus's only hope in a world that covets all we have managed to build! Only with our absolute military triumph can we ever have any true peace, but until then, we must fight! I remain with the New Taifas!

WilliamAnderson posted:



Look Your Lordship. Your men failed. You lost to the French infidels, partly because we didn't have the money to field larger armies, armies of mercenaries so that our own citizens wouldn't have to die for a squabble between the Christ followers. Money is the source to power, and unless we get more money, we will fail to continue to beat them back.

To that end, I remain with the League of Merchants.

How deluded are you? Armies of mercenaries paid for with foreign trade? How reliable! Do you think Al-Andalus is so poor and so weak that we cannot build an army with the resources we already have? That a stronger military won't give you the negotiating power you need to get trade deals worth anything at all?

Lord Cyrahzax fucked around with this message at 18:35 on May 10, 2017

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Snipee posted:

I don't even understand what is the purpose of absorbing more Iberian land if we are never going to convert the Christians. Only the Ulama can give our violence some purpose.

Every Christian kingdom in Iberia is French dagger aimed at our heart! We can only achieve any measure of security with their destruction!

and think of the borders

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



How dissappointing, that the bloodying of our nose inspires the great of Al-Andalus not to seek righteous retribution, but to cower behind silks and empty promises of gold! Only one thing in this world is sure, and it is steel. Therefore:

I, Ismail al-Cyrahzax, propose that we use the wealth that will surely be coming to us on a comprehensive program of military expansion and reform. We should build a barracks in the capital and in other population centers if possible, while also expanding the size of the standing army, recruiting better officers to lead it, and maintaining a minimum amount of wealth for hiring auxiliary forces in times of crisis.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

And Aragon doesn't hate us...?

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

WilliamAnderson posted:

Enemy of enemy. We beat up Castille, they don't like us, but they appreciate us not fighting them.

It looks like France is getting ready to swallow Aragon whole. As bad things are now, imagine having a land border in Iberia with France! And we're ignoring it to play patrician

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Snipee posted:

Look around you, man! There are no other Muslim powers in Western Europe besides us and Palermo! I would be interested in an alliance with Tunis if we weren't already allied with their Moroccan enemies, but we have to be pragmatic and do what is best for our fellows of the Mohammedan faith in Italy. This is no time to voluntarily weaken ourselves. After all, we already bled ourselves assisting the damned Celts. I want to see if they are honorable enough to return the favor when the time comes. And trust me, that time is coming. Have you already forgotten about the ongoing crusade against Palermo? Our attention should be to our west, not our north. We can dispose of the Celtic alliance once we are in a stronger military position to safeguard Islam on our own. The French and Castillians are united in their desire to destroy us, and we certainly cannot defend Islam in Italy if we cannot even defend Islam in Iberia.

The West? What's to the West besides more territory that you admit we can't defend? Why should we ignore the North as they lick their chops for an invasion? The Celts could be a fine distraction, but without a better army and without removing the collaborator-kings in the North, our heartland is not safe!

If we can build alliances in Europe to distract the French, fine, but Palermo signed her own death warrant when she betrayed the Sultanate. Really, we should try to occupy Sicily before the Italians get the chance, maybe the merchants' navy will be good for holding that at least.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Flavius Belisarius posted:



I, Emir Flavius al-Belisarius of the Taifas, who is totally not a Roman, support Lutfi al-Uthman's plan to keep our alliance with the Celts.

All of you who are supporting this barracks initiative: you are correct that a Muslim boy's place is on the battlefield, defending our land from the Christians. Yet, when given a choice, why would we choose to spend our resources on recruiting more of our own when the Christians are fractured and more than ready to spill their own blood against each other? This alliance strengthens us and weakens all of Christendom in the West. We must keep the priests from dissolving it.

I also urge the Merchants to turn away from their trinkets for a moment to give this thought.

And yet, while I support the alliance, I must wonder how much the Celts will be willing to help us? Will their promises from across the sea mean anything when the French are at the gates, or would an army we built for ourselves be more useful?

Let the Ulemas moan, as they always do. The Sultan has the final say.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

catlord posted:

God loving drat it. We trusted you, Celts!


I propose that we massively increase our military research. If we can't trust anybody else, then we'll have to do this poo poo ourselves and we'll need a well trained and technologically advanced military to do so.

I agree with the sentiment here, but we must go further:



I, Ismail al-Cyrahzax, propose that we use the wealth that will surely be coming to us on a comprehensive program of military expansion and reform. We should build a barracks in the capital and in other population centers if possible, while also expanding the size of the standing army, recruiting better officers to lead it, drastically increasing our research into military technology, and maintaining a minimum amount of wealth for hiring auxiliary forces in times of crisis.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Italy and the pope beaten, France and Britain devouring each other, Nicea collapsing, Allah smiles on us! Our work is hardly complete, though, but it looks like our new Sultan knows that.

Long live Hakam!

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



The time is now, the army is ready, and Iberia yearns for our victory!

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Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012

Would it be possible to engineer a personal union with Palermo?

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