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Fight fake news by forming a task force to report in to the ODNI and make recommendations on strategies to counter anti-facts, composed of Mark Zuckerberg, Ezra Klein, and...A DANG MINION?
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Jan 12, 2017 15:12
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Free college, but only if you get a STEM job right away. (No academics, only employees, please)
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Jan 12, 2017 16:14
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Taxes punish successful businessmen, but we need taxes to fund the government. Therefore if you don't own a business, you have to pay the "free-loader" tax. Otherwise you don't have to pay any taxes.
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Jan 12, 2017 16:31
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Replace federal funding for Amtrak (aside from the Acela express) with vouchers to people who want to be launched cross-country on Uber's new national slingshot.
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Jan 12, 2017 16:35
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sady doyle is an intellectual powerhouse
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Jan 12, 2017 16:48
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Lobby hard for some freakin black Minions already!
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Jan 12, 2017 17:27
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dudebros are the greatest threat to american political life
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Jan 12, 2017 17:30
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Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others!
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Jan 12, 2017 17:38
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Fidel Cuckstro posted:Lobby hard for some freakin black Minions already! I think we need some openly gay minions first.
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Jan 12, 2017 17:43
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Crowsbeak posted:I think we need some openly gay minions first. drat it, I promise to do better. I'm sorry.
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Jan 12, 2017 18:01
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Yossarian-22 posted:Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others! Abortions are legal and fully paid for with federal funding but the remains of the embryo must be buried with a full funeral at the woman's expense with a miniature american flag draped over the coffin
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Jan 12, 2017 18:11
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drone pilots must attend more sensitivity training
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Jan 12, 2017 18:51
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Fake news but about incredibly boring pedantic stuff. Like I dunno maybe James Mattis got 1 grade less of stars than he claims or somethin.g
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Jan 12, 2017 18:59
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Marine subsidies to pay hard-working tugboat crews to drag shattered pieces of the Arctic shelf back to Los Angeles for the water harvest
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Jan 12, 2017 21:22
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Take the "watch this" meme but reverse it for technocratic policy decisions that steadily ebb away the rights of the worker. Like luminous trump wall "how many levels of irony are you on right now" "I don't know maybe 5 or 6" "that's too many, watch this" :TTIP: idk
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Jan 12, 2017 21:26
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Massive free trade deals with Cuba, Venezuela and North Korea All citizens required to have a framed portrait of John Maynard Keynes in their homes. All soldiers provided with weekly weed ration.
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Jan 13, 2017 03:32
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Crowsbeak posted:I think we need some openly gay minions first. Gay black minions featured in textbooks illustrations as evidence against the theory of evolution.
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Jan 13, 2017 03:33
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Progressive taxation will be eliminated in favor of a flat tax, but people with yearly income under $20,000 will be given a GMI in the form of several generous gift cards for JC Penny.
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Jan 13, 2017 04:22
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The ACA, Medicare, and Medicaid will all be abolished, but a new government jobs program will guarantee employment at a health insurance company for every able-bodied American worker who wants it.
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Jan 13, 2017 04:23
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All politicians will be chained by the ankle to a member of the opposition party at all times in order to encourage bipartisanship. Joe Lieberman added to Mt. Rushmore.
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Jan 13, 2017 04:33
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UV_Catastrophe posted:All politicians will be chained by the ankle to a member of the opposition party at all times in order to encourage bipartisanship. Joe Lieberman's face to be dynamited off of Mount Rushmore and his entire family shot after loosing an internal political struggle with Cuomo over a difference in opinion on the corn subsidy.
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Jan 13, 2017 04:35
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Fallen Hamprince posted:Joe Lieberman's face to be dynamited off of Mount Rushmore and his entire family shot after loosing an internal political struggle with Cuomo over a difference in opinion on the corn subsidy. Cuomo must resign in disgrace after the contracts for the killing were illegally distributed to donors and friends.
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Jan 13, 2017 08:58
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send white africans back to africa
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Jan 13, 2017 11:39
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Lets provide free childcare for needy families but we a) do it as tax credits, so we dont accidently benefit those who arent contributing enough to society and b) require both parents to be actively working, so we dont accidentally help, like, the ill or something. I think thats an effective centrist policy we can all get behind
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Jan 13, 2017 15:02
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Wait I hosed up thats just normal centrist policy. Lets go a bit further and actually require people to PAY a tax per child unless they are paying for daycare for that child. Really help drive economic activity.
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Jan 13, 2017 15:03
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UV_Catastrophe posted:Joe Lieberman added to Mt. Rushmore.  Also Service Guarantees Citizenship.
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Jan 13, 2017 15:21
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GlyphGryph posted:Wait I hosed up thats just normal centrist policy. Lets go a bit further and actually require people to PAY a tax per child unless they are paying for daycare for that child. Really help drive economic activity. needs more drug tests
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Jan 13, 2017 15:32
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ate poo poo on live tv posted:
*unless they're mexican
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Jan 13, 2017 15:32
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President Michael Bloomberg
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Jan 13, 2017 17:35
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Scrub-Niggurath posted:President Michael Bloomberg a tax on sodas, unless it's imported from another country because tariffs are more evil than sugar drinks.
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Jan 13, 2017 17:36
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Fidel Cuckstro posted:a tax on sodas, unless it's imported from another country because tariffs are more evil than sugar drinks. Excuse me, they use real sugar, so they aren't as bad for you.
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Jan 13, 2017 20:28
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revolutionary activity will be funded by scalping tickets to broadway musicals
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Jan 13, 2017 20:55
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Is there a mascot yet? Jojo the critically endangered sea turtle?
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Jan 13, 2017 21:28
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Public education will be privatized in favor of charter schools. Children from working class families can earn 25% off tuition by agreeing to wear school uniforms covered with NASCAR-esque corporate brand advertisements.
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Jan 13, 2017 21:32
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UV_Catastrophe posted:Public education will be privatized in favor of charter schools. again, this is alt-centrist policies, not 'mainstream republican policies circa 2004' how about : all schools replaced by vouchers for charter schools, all of which must conform to a federally defined curriculum encourages children to subject their teachers and administrative staff to struggle sessions and teaches that man on turtle sex is an inalienable human right
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Jan 13, 2017 21:39
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"racsexism" as a dogwhistle for the word "socialism"
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Jan 13, 2017 21:58
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All guns are completely banned for ownership by any individual with criminal motivations, criminal motivations as defined in the law as "any individual whose gross annual income for the previous year is less than $100,000, or who belongs to an at risk statistical group (see Appendix A for a list of at risk statistical groups), unless currently employed by a qualified individual for this purpose". All weapons must be registered in a central database so that any individual who develops said criminal inclinations can have their weapons seized. Possession is similar, but there's an exception for those who are actively working for and authorized by an individual or group without criminal motivation.
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Jan 13, 2017 22:26
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all gun manufacturers are to be nationalized in order to supply free of charge to every america man, woman and genderfluid child the fully-automatic firearm that are their God-given right
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Jan 13, 2017 22:46
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Fallen Hamprince posted:all gun manufacturers are to be nationalized in order to supply free of charge to every america man, woman and genderfluid child the fully-automatic firearm that are their God-given right You're confusing centrism with alt-far leftism. A centrist would never want guns in the hands of poor blacks, no matter how alt.
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Jan 13, 2017 22:51
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primary reform: primaries are to be conducted solely by caucuses but only superdelegates may caucus
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Jan 13, 2017 22:55
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