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I mostly just lurk in here, but I'm at the point where I'm trying to write a blurb for my novel. Why is it so hard!? The feeling is akin to writing a resume or a cover letter for a job application. I guess because it's a form of self-promotion, which has always been a problem for me. It's also hard to hype the novel I've basically seen in various states of undress, each one more unflattering than the last, for months. Ugh. I need an automatic blurb generator.
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Dec 15, 2020 01:24
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| # ¿ May 20, 2024 23:21 |
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Ccs posted:As an enforcer for the Order of the Magi, Cantus dreams of glory in magical combat. But when a seemingly simple mission leaves Cantus permanently disabled, he will journey to the center of the Auduwyn empire to track the rogue mage who can heal him before his magic disappears forever. As Cantus embarks on his quest, he discovers a growing threat that may challenge the very fabric of their Order. I messed with this a little bit. Basically, I took out the parts that made me lose interest and added a little more agency to Cantus in the last sentence, which might not be what actually happens, but it would make me more interested in this vague threat as a reader.
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Jan 6, 2021 03:54
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quote:The glow from the engraved runes on Cantus’ staff faded as he and his partner Renk moved through the haze of the rogue mage’s hall. Do you need to remind the reader that it’s Cantus’s staff here? If you take that out, it’s clearer. quote:As the glow from the engraved runes on the staff faded, Cantus and his partner Renk moved through the haze of the rogue mage’s hall.
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Jan 13, 2021 05:47
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I’ve used some version of ‘Save the Cat’ before, more as just a very loose guideline for my plot.
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May 14, 2021 17:22
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sebmojo posted:Gdocs can't handle very large docs well at all, I was reading a goons novel draft and had to put it into epub to make it work Yes, Gdocs slows down for me substantially right around the 80,000 word mark, especially when the doc contains a lot of comments and I want to scroll through them and/or respond. Up until then, it’s great.
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Jul 24, 2021 23:30
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Hey, y’all, I need blurb writing help. I figured I’d try here first and then swing by the self-publishing thread, too. Here is my original blurb:quote:A divided city. A killer who stalks the border between two worlds. Any thoughts? I feel like there’s some awkward phrasing in there.
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Sep 12, 2021 15:30
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Very helpful. Thanks! Let me work on this and I’ll get a new version up. Biggest issue: I’m not sure I can add anything more substantial about the conspiracy without spoiling the plot. Was even considering not mentioning a conspiracy because that spoils a little.
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Sep 12, 2021 16:35
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Readers. Yeah, you’re right. Changed it a tiny bit (I’m terrible at these things!): quote:A divided city. A killer who stalks the border between two worlds. A woman desperate to prove herself. I really can’t think of a way to be less generic about the conspiracy without spoiling the main murder plot. I’ll work on it. newts fucked around with this message at 18:51 on Sep 12, 2021 |
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Sep 12, 2021 18:05
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DropTheAnvil posted:Blurbs are the toughest thing you can write. If you can, get your beta readers to summarize the novel for you, and use their summary as a guide to highlight what's interesting. Thanks! Good points. I’ll see how I can get some of these answers in there, or clear up what’s written. quote:The last bit of the blurb is... cliched. "Despite her fears" "Deeper into a conspiracy" "threatens both their lives" are pretty much used in every thriller book I have read. While it lets your reader know what type of book this is, I would find a way to give the last bit of the blurb a voice. Ha! I’m actually going for cliched here because readers seem to know what they’re getting. I’ll try to mix it up a little. So it’s not quite so blah. kaom posted:I’m not sure you need to mention the conspiracy at all TBH, as someone who read your book. The stakes at the beginning that hooked me are the upcoming negotiations for reconciliation that are providing a ticking clock and extra importance to the case. This is set up super early and spoils nothing if you want to use it instead. I hadn’t thought of that, thanks! Good idea. It seems complicated to explain in a blurb, but I’ll see what I can do. A long blurb is probably fine for the ebook version, anyway. I’ve seen people with five paragraphs.
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Sep 13, 2021 13:45
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That sounds like a better book than the one I wrote! Thanks! This actually helps a lot.
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Sep 14, 2021 03:44
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So, that earth example is a stumper for sure—I don’t know if I can untangle that. But for the other two, I’d prefer a past tense for the whole thing: He clapped me on the back with his free hand and I returned the gesture. We did not shake hands here. His ranch house lay a mile down narrow trails snaking through the pine forest, labyrinthine at first, until you realized that all paths led to the pond's fragrant shores. I don’t know, it just reads more easily to me. The only place where I wouldn’t mind what you have, is if you’ve got weird narrative stuff going on: a narrator telling a story that jumps in time or other timeline strangeness.
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Sep 15, 2021 17:27
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sebmojo posted:Also you can always post a thread in CC and pimp it here. No need to ask for permission. This is what worked for me! I got a lot of very, very helpful comments and now I’m pretty much ready to publish. You might also post your book on r/betareaders for a reading swap.
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Oct 5, 2021 20:38
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Sure! Go for it. (I am totally unprepared)
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Oct 13, 2021 00:39
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“But, like, what’s her motivation for being Asian?”
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Dec 6, 2021 00:30
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ultrachrist posted:The notion of characters writing themselves irritates me almost as much as ‘I am a professional LIAR.’ I really dislike this too because people use it so often to distance themselves from their writing decisions. Just admit you wanted your characters to gently caress.
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Dec 31, 2021 17:52
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HIJK posted:
I’m not exactly making GBS threads on it, but pretending your characters are separate people is silly. There’s nothing to understand: plans/moods/inspiration/ motivations might change as you write, especially if it’s written over a long span, and you can either go with it or course correct. The memes are fine. I just get tired of seeing this particular one over and over again. newts fucked around with this message at 19:42 on Dec 31, 2021 |
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Dec 31, 2021 19:39
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Milkfred E. Moore posted:Seconding Battuta: you're kinda hosed. My manuscript has three protagonists: asexual white male, gay white male, lesbian black female. One of these match me, two don't. Over the past few months, I've been filtered at the submission level when agents ask a question along the lines of 'If you're writing a perspective that doesn't match your identity, why is this necessary to your story?' and I've had a few email replies that basically say the same thing because I've outlined which one I am in my query letter. These may or may not be the same agents who talk up how they want to read SF/F with queer heroes and how they love representing minority voices. It’s really disheartening to me that you’re getting this kind of response. I understand the need for the Own Voices movement, but does that mean every character you write must match your own identity?
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Jan 5, 2022 22:30
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Yeah, I’m not sure how much the color-coding would work, or even what problem it would solve. And I can only imagine how much work it might be. The comic-sans trick does work for me. I always thought that was because I have a weird brain (ADD) but I’ve heard other people swear by it too. It doesn’t really give the distance I need to look at my work objectively, but it does help me just get words on the page as quickly as possible when I’m stuck.
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Jan 19, 2022 15:38
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Blurb writing is, perhaps, the most painful aspect of the whole writing process for me. It’s just… not fun. Here’s a blurb for my book, which is a mystery/detective story, and a sequel:quote:A murder with no motive. An invisible killer. A detective blessed and cursed with an unusual ability. Please destroy.
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Jan 29, 2022 16:46
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Thank you! That’s super helpful. I can see exactly what you mean. I’ll give it another go with an attempt at being more specific.
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Feb 3, 2022 14:51
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Something I’ve been thinking about lately is how there’s a weird parallel—for me, at least—in producing visual art and writing. I have really similar issues with translating what I’m seeing or imagining my head onto the page when I’m doing both things. That’s pretty surprising to me because I’d always imagined writing and drawing as two really different processes. When I’m thinking of an illustration, I’ll often build (what seems like) an incredibly detailed picture of the final product in my head. Composition, colors, etc—everything is there the way I want it. This feels like a finished piece that I can just translate onto paper (or computer screen). But, not shockingly, this never works. No matter how careful I am with drafting. And I’m actually pretty decent at drawing from a reference. The finished thing never resembles the ideal. So, I think I’ve come to the understanding that what’s in my head is not as detailed or complete as I imagine, but is my brain sort of filling in the details for me. I feel I’m seeing them, but maybe I’m not really seeing them and only imagining they’re there. Writing is weirdly sort of the same for me. I imagine an idealized thing: plot, characters, setting, atmosphere, sounds. It’s more like a movie, or random, disconnected scenes from a movie. And I know that would be hard to translate to writing. But, I realized that even when I’m imagining in words what I’m going to write, I have the same issue: the dialogue or paragraphs I’m imagining as finished are somehow incomplete. The words are not all there, only some of them, and my brain imagines the rest. I don’t even know how to describe it—I guess they just exist as a feeling. They’re sort of filled in just like the details of the art I think I can see. Anyway, that makes it just as hard to translate what I’m imagining to the page as the drawing issue. It’s a completely different process when I’m sitting at my computer, actually writing—more like actually drawing. Even my writing doesn’t come out the way I imagine it should. Anyway, those are my dumb writing thoughts for the day.
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Feb 4, 2022 15:19
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Yeah, makes sense. I also sometimes wonder if the masters—of all arts—ever have their work come out exactly the way they’d imagined it. If that’s a skill you can achieve with lots of practice? Does it even matter? And, for a more technical issue, how do you guys like to handle gaps in speech or hesitant speech? I think I overuse ellipses, but I can’t really think of an alternative that conveys the same feeling?
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Feb 5, 2022 21:23
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Good points! There’s a writer whose style I really like (She writes fanfiction. Shut up!) who uses a period to indicate a pause in dialogue or thoughts. It took me a little while to get used to it, but I really like how simple it is. Gets the same feeling of the ellipses without the annoying visual.
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Feb 6, 2022 02:03
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I have a tiny grammar/word choice question. quote:That was odd. He’d never been so consciously aware of what someone else wanted and yet feel no compulsion to act. Was she doing it? Was he? ‘Feel’ seems like the correct tense to me, but I can’t articulate why. Google Docs and real human people think ‘felt’ would be better.
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Feb 17, 2022 15:32
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I will go with ‘felt’ then. Thanks for the help!
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Feb 17, 2022 19:46
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Thank you! I’m not a tense expert. I tried the sentence using ‘felt’ and it just doesn’t sit right on a read through—it’s not getting across what I want to say. I think I might have to just rewrite the paragraph to make it less problematic.
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Feb 18, 2022 17:57
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Very cool grammar science stuff!
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Feb 20, 2022 01:40
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Thanks for all the grammar help and the interesting discussion. I couldn’t find a way to make that paragraph work as is, so I rewrote it a bit. I finished a complete draft of my second novel today  I mean, it’s felt finished for a while because I edit as I go, but there were sections here and there that needed attention. They still need attention, but it’s actually, technically complete for the first time. Now I need to go back and read through again. Edits #3-5 incoming.
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Feb 21, 2022 00:11
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Series writing questions… I’m struggling with this issue currently. How much reminding of setting/characters/previous events do you need to put in to each book for your readers? I tend to not like or need a lot of reminding in the series I’m reading, because if I find something I like I read all of it fast. So my tendency is to keep it to the bare minimum, to what feels organic for the characters reflecting back. But I get that there will be delays between one book and the next. Do I need to worry about readers who wait for the next installment? Probably not because no one buys my poo poo, but like in general? On the other hand, how likely is someone to pick up book 2 in a random, unknown ebook series on Amazon? These are not going to be bestsellers that people grab from a display table on a whim. Is there even really a reason to worry about accessibility for new readers? Or should you just jump in right where the story continues? I’ve noticed a trend in the series I’ve read on Amazon to not bother with much reminding or plot summaries. The next book just flows right on from the previous one. This feels really different from the series I have actual physical copies of—lots of reminding in those.
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Feb 27, 2022 17:22
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Maybe I’m thinking of something like The Dresden Files, where the repetition used to introduce the characters/setting gets really grating after you’ve read through maybe 3 of them. ETA: Yeah, the printed series are way older than the ebooks I’m reading. I think I stopped buying print books in like 2002 or something? Maybe it’s more that the genres I like have changed, I don’t know. newts fucked around with this message at 20:48 on Feb 27, 2022 |
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Feb 27, 2022 19:12
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Don’t give up! It’s hard to get critiques. And it’s hard to get told that something’s not working and to realize you might have to rewrite a big chunk or scrap something you’ve worked hard on. That doesn’t mean there’s nothing good there. Also, I think 2 of 3 critique partners have a good point: of course they’re going to focus on the ‘bad stuff’. It’s actually a lot easier to get deep, good crits on work that’s mostly really good. It makes the problems stand out more sharply, and makes them easier to recognize. As opposed to something that’s just a big old mess from start to finish. I say this as a person who had to give up doing art professionally because I just couldn’t take the crits. Writing is only slightly less painful.
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Mar 7, 2022 17:15
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Editing sucks. And not just because it’s difficult and tedious. It also sucks because I’m about to read the same drat book for the fifth or so time and I really don’t want to read it again. Though I suppose that’s what makes editing tedious. On writing groups: I looked around to see if there was anything local to me and there was one genre-based crit group (I live in a decent-sized city). But the level of commitment and work expected from members each week just seemed like too much to handle with my schedule. I think they required comments/crits on approximately 15,000 words per week, plus a weekly in-person meeting. And, yeah. I think I’ll just stick to my low-key online group.
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Mar 10, 2022 21:38
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Thanks for the link! I think I’ve seen it before (the method is very familiar) but I’d totally forgotten about it. I guess my only caveat is that I’m too dumb/inexperienced/incompetent to judge if a scene is doing all of the work that it should. I mean, is it okay to have scenes where characters just talk and maybe work out some character beats, but also scenes where they just give each other information? Like, I feel my ability to judge all of this in one pass is just not at that level yet.
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Mar 10, 2022 22:58
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I feel like a lot of that is incidental: I’m more confident and better able to write in detail about things I know, so my characters have attributes that are things I know. But, I mean, same thing for my settings  Also, most of my main characters are bi because I’m bi and I like reading about bi people, but that’s really the only bit of myself I add that’s not related specifically to ease of writing. Also, lots of people are bi, so why not?
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Apr 2, 2022 14:44
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I was trying to think of when I use epithets, because I use them very, very occasionally. Obviously they’re useful when POV characters don’t know other people’s names. But they can be useful sometimes when trying to establish some emotional distance between characters. I think that’s it, though. I don’t use them often. Also… Yes! More grammar and word talk!
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May 17, 2022 13:56
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It’s normal (unfortunately) part of writing fanfic, and creepy as hell. But it’s just weird spam. Guy probably sends that out to hundreds of people a day, depending on how horny he is. Anyone who writes for any anime-adjacent fandoms gets pretty used to it.
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May 19, 2022 13:27
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Okay, this might be a dumb question, but is the past tense of ‘cast’, as in ‘he cast a spell’, cast or casted? I see both used regularly (could be a UK vs American English thing?) but cast seems correct to me for the past tense: ‘he cast a spell’ or ‘he had cast a spell’.
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May 22, 2022 01:24
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I use the rosters for the classes I teach for my name inspiration. Works well.
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Jun 28, 2022 22:50
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Interrupting AI chat (which is really interesting, btw, but I know almost nothing about it) to drop a link to my thread about the book I’m working on: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?noseen=1&threadid=4008761&pagenumber=1&perpage=40#post525210579 I could use some readers, if anyone felt like taking a look. Harsh crits are fine—I can handle it.
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Aug 5, 2022 14:02
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| # ¿ May 20, 2024 23:21 |
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General Battuta posted:I think you’re very good! Your prose is dead on for the kind of story you’re trying to tell. Thank you! Very helpful crit. I agree that I struggle with adding weirdness, and originality in general. I was worrying about this exact thing as I wrote. And it’s always a hard line to walk trying to write a first-person narrator who’s not naive, but hasn’t quite seen it all yet. Probably standard urban fantasy stuff: jaded, supernatural world-weary protagonist (my story might be more ‘rural fantasy, maybe). I think (hope) the ghosts get weirder as the story progresses, but I’ll see what I can do to make it more distinctive right from the start. Thanks so much 
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Aug 5, 2022 15:00
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