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Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Broadsword: Age of Chilvary

There's just something really odd with the animations and the jump cuts with arrows. Truly a worthy competitor to the Total war series.

Have a Youtube link to the trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PKO_-uf2oQ

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Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
I've another one with poor animation known as Ruction: http://store.steampowered.com/app/496820 Pay attention to that walk animation. His hips don't lie.

Youtube trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxbK_AAcSYw

It's Early Access, for whatever that's worth. The second trailer in the store page is... uh. It's something.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Make Trump the President again: http://store.steampowered.com/app/575910

The gameplay looks very terrible. You collect things coming at you or dropping from above. It also has simulator in the title.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Max's Big Bust has much better art.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

The Saddest Rhino posted:

What is self cest

Is it masturbation

I think it has to be some kind of double (a version of self) or a clone (not a twin). I don't make the rules though.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Unit Z will never die.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Just look at the screenshots: http://store.steampowered.com/app/490690

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
I added the Tycoon game to my wishlist and that last one is free, so I'm down.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
I think this is a bad game that has a bunch of fake positive reviews: http://store.steampowered.com/app/553790

Or maybe the Russian writing is actually very good. I have no idea, but I suspect tomfoolery.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Why is there no gif of King Neptune eating SWAT 4 over and over again? :colbert:

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
The max level of a badge is five. A foil badge only has one level. :colbert: You also generate backgrounds and emoticons from crafting badges, some of which can be valuable depending on the dev's effort.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
I've added a surprising amount of games to my wishlist from here. Frisky Business will be #2.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
I don't know. Maybe watch the trailer and share your thoughts?

http://store.steampowered.com/app/592750

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
The truly fat VN's have a price to match. They are long experiences.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

CommissarMega posted:

Also Franken Fran is good :colbert:

Agreed. (Also, really weird.)

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Ticket: http://store.steampowered.com/app/564810

What if these games are good and they're just bad at PR and screenshots/trailers?

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Impress your love with Hacky Sack: http://store.steampowered.com/app/595160

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

I saw this earlier in my queue and was wondering what kind of people the artist used as a reference for those kind of bosoms.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
It feels like a slower, less intense SEGA Bass Fishing.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

d0grent posted:

we are slowly going insane

here's a chicken with a gun

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_7NLeLYmPI

Some good edits.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

Palpek posted:

So what's up with that Mr. Massagy game on Steam:



Does that controller have a vagina?

It's a dating sim that unlocks different rumble patterns for the controller depending on how well you do. I thought it parodied the genre pretty well. The body pillow date was funny.

Also, the controller may or may not have a vulva.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
http://store.steampowered.com/app/587420/Cart_Racer/

I'm not sure why they have racer in the title.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Hmm. Is Dungeonmans the funnier one between it and Tales of Maj'Eyal?

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
^ Thanks!
-
I'll now point out this game that has an excellent title and popped up in my queue: http://store.steampowered.com/app/649740/CRAFT_BATTLE_SIMULATOR/

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Still no games with hen ties though.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
That's a lot of achievements.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

It's a game that looks like it's from the time I was in middle school.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
House Party? SA, please. Here's my GOTY: http://store.steampowered.com/app/660180/Seduction/

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
I guess they could add a "Seriously" in front of Awful and drop "Steam" to minimize confusion or not paying attention errors.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Great name change!

I'll celebrate by pointing out a horse racing game: http://store.steampowered.com/app/655610/Horse_Racing_2016/

It features a UI made with old Paint.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Could be eighteen or nineteen.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
Wooooah. Looking at the screenshots for other game(s) the dev did that are released.... Porn. Porn everywhere. And decent card prices.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

Theli posted:

This may be one of the worst trailers I've ever seen.

http://store.steampowered.com/app/686380/Nightmare_at_the_lighthouse

"THERE IS A STORY"

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
She's clearly sitting on that guy's face.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

Dark_Swordmaster posted:

No no, it is an incredibly bad drawing. It's just that it's also clear what's happening.


Anime.

Yes, exactly.

The art is indeed quite terrible, FirstAidKite. There is absolutely something wrong with how the characters are positioned and the angle of the floor. It's as if it's trying to become a wall.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
The good ol' doused in oil look.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

Palpek posted:




:yikes: Valve, could you at least get pedo games off Steam? loving hell.

I'm going to have to recommend not looking at that whole screenshot. He probably did turn into a pedophile.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

Olive! posted:

Sharks are smooth.

In one direction.

Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS

LORD OF BOOTY posted:

i'm reading investigative journalism about bad games on steam on a literal anime porn site

2017 is the weirdest loving year

Well, I'll be gosh darned.

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Jamfrost
Jul 20, 2013

I'm too busy thinkin' about my baby. Oh I ain't got time for nothin' else.
Slime TrainerS
These Sakura (Winged Cloud) games seem vanilla compared to what this thread is bringing up now.

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