Let's Play Rock-Paper-Scissors! [Sign-up and observer thread]

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Let's Play Rock-Paper-Scissors! [Sign-up and observer thread]

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Mraagvpeine: Nov 4, 2014; I won this avatar on a technicality this thick.

Some people just want to watch the ~~world~~ forums burn.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 07:02

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 01:38

Pea: Nov 25, 2005; Friendly neighbourhood vegetable

Regy Rusty posted:

nine-gear crow is pushing the envelope

That's putting it mildly. Although I do find it oddly convenient to have a plot twist like this. right before the LP is going to end.

Rock smashes Scissors, which cuts Paper, which in turn envelops Rock. That much we know. Question is, what move defeats Villainous Crow?

Perhaps both teams can throw some sort of RockPaperScissors fusion hand which trumps the Crow? An RPS-Megazord if you will.

Whatever happens next, we already know the true loser of the game.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 07:06

ssmagus: Apr 2, 2010; Assmagus, LPer ass-traordinaire

The true winner is the team that switches their vote to dynamite, everyone knows that.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 07:16

BlackPersona: Oct 21, 2012

Team Left and Team Right both lose, and Team [Sign-up and observer thread] is the winner.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 07:23

Olive!: Mar 16, 2015; It's not a ghost, but probably a 'living corpse'. The 'living dead' with a hell of a lot of bloodlust...

Looks like Crow's really flipped his lid this time.

Wait... Crow? Bird... flip?

This is it.

The ultimate play.

A weapon to surpass even rock.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 07:48

Patrick Spens: Jul 21, 2006; "Every quarterback says they've got guts, But how many have actually seen 'em?"; Pillbug

Wowwwww, Crow's a bitch.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 07:52

Jobbo_Fett: Mar 7, 2014; Slava Ukrayini; Clapping Larry

IS NOTHING SACRED ANYMORE!?

# ? Mar 1, 2017 08:07

Added Space: Jul 13, 2012; Free Markets
Free People

Curse you Hayard-Gunnes!

I know there's no table needed for RPS, but drat it I want to flip one anyway.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 08:25

Paul.Power: Feb 7, 2009; The three roles of APCs:
Transports.
Supply trucks.
Distractions.

Added Space posted:

I know there's no table needed for RPS, but drat it I want to flip one anyway.

Both sides appear to be flipping it anyway.

How does nine-gear crow's blood stack up against scissors? Is it in any of the expansions?

# ? Mar 1, 2017 08:50

ssmagus: Apr 2, 2010; Assmagus, LPer ass-traordinaire

Paul.Power posted:

Both sides appear to be flipping it anyway.

How does nine-gear crow's blood stack up against scissors? Is it in any of the expansions?

What's the hand sign for crow's blood anyway?

# ? Mar 1, 2017 09:40

Hammurabi: Nov 4, 2009

ssmagus posted:

What's the hand sign for crow's blood anyway?

A sort of curved hand with splayed fingers. You bend your hand in the shape of a wave (as in a wave of liquid, such as water or (in this case) blood, not as in waving), and you splay your fingers to represent either a crow's tail/wings or droplets/rivulets of blood.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 10:08

90s Cringe Rock: Nov 29, 2006

I did not think this could get more intense than a 3-0 lead becoming a 3-3 tie, and yet here we are.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 10:12

Covski: Jun 24, 2007; Bringing the forums together with the greatest thread!

I go to bed with both teams in a comfortable P-P tie, and this is what I come back to? Damned if this LP ever stops surprising me.

To summarise, nine-gear crow posted the following in the Team Right thread:

nine-gear crow posted:

It appears the lot of you have forced my hand. You'll thank me when this is all over.

I change my vote to Abstain and give Scissors the majority. And to destroy this game.

And then this in the other team's thread:

nine-gear crow posted:

I grow tired of this pathetic game.

Greetings Team Left. For those of you who do not know me, allow me to introduce myself. My name is nine-gear crow, Let's Play sub-forum super villain and a member of the failing Team Right and more importantly, I am here to defect. Not from Team Right. But from Rock Paper Scissors itself.

I come with vital information that can, if you decide to act on it, secure your victory in this war. Team Right has chosen to throw Scissors in Round 12 by majority vote. If you throw your Paper, you will lose the round and the game.

That said, if you change your vote to Rock, you will win. I can assure you though, my information is accurate. You will win. But it will be a tarnished win, a win everyone will know you cheated to acquire. Illegitimate. A dishonorable win.

So, ask yourselves. How far do you want to go to win? You say you want a win at any cost? Well, there's the key and the price. The majority of the votes are in on both sides. Covski will make the throw soon.

You can throw Paper and lose. You can throw Rock and win*. Or, perhaps, you can throw Scissors yourself and stalemate the game for another round. In which case, I'll be back, and we can do this all over again until someone makes the right choice.

You know what it is that I ask. The choice is yours.

Team Right predictably reacted with confusion, and Team Left by honourably calling for nine-gear crow's blood.

The truth is, I'm not certain as how to deal with this sudden heel-turn by nine-gear crow. One thing I know, however, is that the game ends this round. :siren:

Thus, you, the observer thread, will have to decide: :siren:

A) Make nine-gear crow an unperson. His name will be stricken from all official records of the LP, and all votes made after he upset the natural order of RPS will be ignored. This will result in Team Right winning, with a one vote majority for scissors.

B) Decide the game with one round of Let's Play Flip-A-Coin.

C) Decide the game with one round of Prisoners' Dilemma. The teams will vote on whether they (betray) or their opponents (cooperate) deserve to win.

Observer thread, your votes please.

Covski fucked around with this message at 14:02 on Mar 1, 2017

# ? Mar 1, 2017 12:52

90s Cringe Rock: Nov 29, 2006

C) The players vote on which team wins.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 12:56

someone awful.: Sep 7, 2007

flipping a coin is more in the spirit of the thing IMO, but I'm really kind of disgusted it'd end like this.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 12:58

echidnagirl: Mar 27, 2014

When did RPS turn into wrestling?

~~I vote for flipping a coin~~
Changing my vote to C

echidnagirl fucked around with this message at 14:32 on Mar 1, 2017

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:00

Covski: Jun 24, 2007; Bringing the forums together with the greatest thread!

90s Cringe Rock posted:

C) The players vote on which team wins.

~~I'm willing to accept this vote.~~

Tell you what, let's take this one step further. I'll add an option to end this via a round of Prisoners' Dilemma.

someone awful. posted:

flipping a coin is more in the spirit of the thing IMO, but I'm really kind of disgusted it'd end like this.

For what it's worth, option A is essentially the fair result of the round. It could conceivably be counted as needing a tie breaker between paper and scissors for Right, but I think we're all loath to see this game go to another round via a tie at this point.

Covski fucked around with this message at 13:08 on Mar 1, 2017

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:03

ssmagus: Apr 2, 2010; Assmagus, LPer ass-traordinaire

D) Use the fouth option of PAY FOR CROW MURDER.

I vote A for fairness.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:10

Takanago: Jun 2, 2007; You'll see...

How would Flip-a-coin and prisoner's dilemma work?

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:23

Covski: Jun 24, 2007; Bringing the forums together with the greatest thread!

Flip a coin: Team Left, having scored the first point, chooses between heads or tails. The coin is flipped. If their chosen symbol is on the upwards facing side, they win. Otherwise, Team Right wins.

Prisoners' Dilemma: Both teams simultaneously choose between cooperating or betraying. If both teams cooperate, they both win with 4-4. If one team betrays and the other cooperates, the betraying team wins with 4-3. If they both betray, the game ends at 3-3 and they both lose because they just can't play nicely.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:32

Ygmir: Jan 27, 2012

I vote for the C Prisoner's dilemma, since they have both been betrayed by Crow, and have become prisoners' of his callousness.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:36

Jen X: Sep 29, 2014; To bring light to the darkness, whether that darkness be ignorance, injustice, apathy, or stagnation.

Prisoner's dillemma, but crow gets a loss no matter what and gets a triple loss if both teams betray

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:45

Space Kablooey: May 6, 2009

I'm voting C.

And this:

GeneX posted:

Prisoner's dillemma, but crow gets a loss no matter what and gets a triple loss if both teams betray

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:46

Paul.Power: Feb 7, 2009; The three roles of APCs:
Transports.
Supply trucks.
Distractions.

C sounds good, and thematically appropriate.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:49

Luhood: Nov 13, 2012

I feel like I'm missing out everything by not reading the Right and Left threads...

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:56

Covski: Jun 24, 2007; Bringing the forums together with the greatest thread!

A fair point (and yes, you sure are!), I'll add in a summary of recent developments into the post.

Edit: It's done.

Covski fucked around with this message at 14:03 on Mar 1, 2017

# ? Mar 1, 2017 13:58

Fedule: Mar 27, 2010; No one left uncured.
I got you.

The teams are supposed to not read this thread, right?

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:01

Nyaa: Jan 7, 2010; Like, Nyaa.

C. I would like to suggest a three players version of prisoner dilemma. The third player being Crow.

If all three players cooperate (paper), they all win.

If two players cooperate (paper), betray/abstain player lose.

If all three players betray (Scissor), they all lose.

Only Crow is allowed to abstain (Rock).

If Only Crow cooperate, he wins.

If Two betray and Crow abstain, it is a draw.

Edit: not sure if i should also add 'if only crow abstain with no one cooperate, he wins.'

Nyaa fucked around with this message at 14:07 on Mar 1, 2017

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:03

Covski: Jun 24, 2007; Bringing the forums together with the greatest thread!

Fedule posted:

The teams are supposed to not read this thread, right?

Yup, it's clearly stated in the rules. It's almost as forbidden as reading the opponent's thread!

I've been pretty lenient about people slipping up, cause who would have expected someone to actually attempt to cheat at RPS? :v:

Nyaa posted:

No matter how much I enjoy a good dramatic heel turn at the last moment, I'm going to refuse to let crow have any impact on the outcome of this game as a matter of principle :colbert:

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:07

Erwin the German: May 30, 2011; :3

C is the most appropriate dramatic conclusion to this tale.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:08

jimmydalad: Sep 26, 2013; My face when others are unable to appreciate the

AGDQ 2018 Awful Block Survivor

I would like to think A is the fair choice, but we might as well go with C due to thematic appropriateness. Also, I can't believe someone cheated in RPS. That was admittedly not one of the things I was expecting. Sad it has to end this way.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:12

Acebuckeye13: Nov 2, 2010; If you or someone you know has a gambling problem, crisis counseling and referral services can be accessed by calling
1-800-GAMBLER; Ultra Carp

I'm voting for A, if only because I want to see Team Left blow a 3-0 lead.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:19

Fedule: Mar 27, 2010; No one left uncured.
I got you.

If option C prevails I will add an extra wrinkle to proceedings. It will be fun.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:23

Takanago: Jun 2, 2007; You'll see...

I'll vote C.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:40

Nyaa: Jan 7, 2010; Like, Nyaa.

Covski posted:

No matter how much I enjoy a good dramatic heel turn at the last moment, I'm going to refuse to let crow have any impact on the outcome of this game as a matter of principle

The third player can be someone else or external factor. I believe a 3x3 dilemma is more appropriate for the RPS theme.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:40

Covski: Jun 24, 2007; Bringing the forums together with the greatest thread!

Since it seems we have reached a consensus, I won't drag the vote out longer than necessary.

Will update soon.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 14:41

Covski: Jun 24, 2007; Bringing the forums together with the greatest thread!

The information given to the teams for the final round:

Covski posted:

Round 12 is finished!

After the sudden deliberate betrayal of their team and the very spirit of Rock-Paper-Scissors by a certain player, the observer thread has adjudicated this round. The result:

gently caress NINE-GEAR CROW! IT IS A TIE!

Current score: Tied at 3-3

I can feel that you all agree that the game should have ended this round, and by right maybe it should have. You have all put up a marvellous fight, and it's been a joy and a great source of excitement to watch you battle. However, all things must come to an end.

Of course, we can't let the actions of one maverick decide how the game ends. Instead, the choice of who wins will be entirely in your hands. Thus, we are going to do something different for the thirteenth and final round of this game:

Let's play Prisoner's Dilemma!

You have one simple choice: Will you agree that you are both deserving winners of this game (cooperate), or will you claim that your team are the only worthy winners? (betray)

If you both cooperate, both teams will win with a score of 4-4.

If one team cooperates and the other betrays, the betraying team will win with a score of 4-3.

If both teams betray, both team will lose with a score of 3-3. The only winning move will have been not to play.

Extra rule by popular demand: If any team cooperates, nine-gear crow loses. If both teams betray, nine-gear crow triple-loses.

Round thirteen begins now. This game ends here. Make your choice.

A fitting end, if you ask me.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 15:04

Carlioo: Dec 26, 2012

This is the most excited I've ever been about rock-paper-scissors and I read the RPS-Kid arc in Jojo's.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 15:42

Green Intern: Dec 29, 2008; Loon, Crazy and Laughable

This has been riveting.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 15:45

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 01:38

Fedule: Mar 27, 2010; No one left uncured.
I got you.

Allow me to wrinkle the proceedings further.

Crow's transgression is going to punished. This is not up for question.

I don't know quite how I feel about the matter, however. This was clearly a violation of the spirit of the game, and yet it has been a source of entertainment and drama in these dark times. How slighted are we, really?

I will therefore determine the severity of Crow's punishment according to the depth of the hatred across both teams.

There are twenty-one non-treacherous players across both teams, and I will count their betray votes.

0) 6 hours.
1-3) 12 hours.
4-12) 1 day.
13-18) 3 days
19-21) 1 week

Fate will decide.

E: the teams will not be told any of this.

# ? Mar 1, 2017 15:46

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