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Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Dr Christmas posted:

I am a little disappointed with the hover rack though. I pictured their poolball helms all racked together and their bodies dangling down, and nothing could compare to that image.

That is literally the exact mental image I had upon reading the phrase Hover Rack and I share your disappointment. If bringing that concept into canon isn't a good reason to bring him back then I don't know what is.

I genuinely love ridiculously stupid villain gimmicks. Like even A-list villains can be goofy as hell but they don't hold a candle to someone like the 8-Ball guy.

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Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Apparently he teamed up with one of the Hobgoblins but never fought Spider-man. He really does feel like the kind of joke villain Spidey would be webbing up in the intro to a comic where he fights one of his regular rogues gallery.

I read all of 8-Ball's lines in this upper-class English voice because I feel he'd be so committed to the bit that he'd double-dip on the "English" pun.

Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Lobok posted:

Ah well, yes, he does have skill. I just didn't want gimme the GOD drat candy to grow up reading 8-Ball issues and think "one day I too am going to know the right spot on a car to strike to launch it in the air!"

Children everywhere grow up dreaming of one day being as cool as a throwaway Sleepwalker villain.

Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Lobok posted:

X-0, I know this isn't really a thread for requests, but can you post the rest of the Ani-Men please?

...

He can only lift and carry things while airborne.

Whenever he lands his legs just shatter from the impact and he has to use his now non-superhuman arms to crawl to a hospital.

Seconding the demand for more Ani-Men. Please tell us about these characters so minor that writers literally did not care if they were dead or alive. You might read this as sarcasm but it absolutely is not.

Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Mover posted:

The Spot's been cool since the 90s Spider-Man cartoon imo

That was a really memorable episode. They did a pretty good job showing he was kind of a goof who just happened to end up with this absurdly strong power. He went through a whole character arc in, what, 22 minutes?
I've never seen him in any other version of Spider-Man but I'd probably still see that as the definitive version of him anyway.

DivineCoffeeBinge posted:

Dude if you think 8-Ball is a bad character you have no soul

I love that 8-Ball has become the de facto mascot of this thread. Nobody has a bad word to say about him.

Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

The one Ultimate X-Men panel I remember is Ultimate Sinister introducing Xavier to his greatest foe of all.

"Stairs."

Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Ghostlight posted:

He's actually a double-reference. Note he's credited as Whizzer II - this is because The Whizzer was one of Marvel's original golden age heroes

Whizzer I was one of the Six Forgotten Warriors in the 90s Spider-Man animated series story arc of the same name. They were a team from World War 2 (and so were all elderly) with connections to Captain America who was trapped in another dimension wrestling Red Skull for 50 years, etc.

Upon introducing himself as The Whizzer and getting an incredulous reaction from Spider-Man he just says "It was a different time, okay?"

Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Open Marriage Night posted:

Wasn't Electro like Red Skull's son or something?

Electro was Red Skull's (initially) unpowered son. Chameleon was Red Skull's adopted son with no relation to Kraven, I think?

Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Nilbop posted:

I just love the idea that Skull-Face himself has no idea if he's actually the skeleton of a demon or not, so he goes around describing himself as the skeleton of an alleged demon.

I read it more as "It was alleged that I was a demon, which is why I was burned, but the allegations were false and I was in fact human. My living skeleton powers are unrelated.".
Although either explanation is hilariously goofy.

Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Edge & Christian posted:

I will ride or die for Doctor Druid because his entire story was that he was terrible and ill-equipped to be an Avenger which puts him ahead of everyone else mentioned.

Doctor Druid is weird in that he is very deliberately written as a gigantic rear end in a top hat. He's not likeable in the way any of the other heroes are, he turns out to be kind of a misogynist when there's a woman leading the team, etc. He's an awful person but a unique character, and it's just funny to have him as the one guy on the team none of the other members actually like.

If not for being kind of a jerk he'd be forgettable outside of his vaguely-racist origin story.

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Brofessor Slayton
Jan 1, 2012

Ghostlight posted:

They're all professional juggler turned criminal except for Bombshell. :allears:

Oddball apparently had to teach her how to juggle to get a full lineup for his team. That's some ridiculous commitment to the gimmick which is actively detrimental to the team, as she already had a much more useful power (bomb expertise) that he's now telling her not to apply in any useful way.

Take thread-favourite 8-Ball, for instance. You can fit into his gimmick by just putting on a round helmet. 8-Ball could just give helmets to anyone - random unpowered goons, any of the Death Throws, the Sinister Six, Magneto, Galactus, anyone. But actually taking the time to teach someone to juggle explosives perfectly and saying "no, you learn this or you're off the team" is at best a waste of time.

RandallODim posted:

Tell me Hawkeye gets out by climbing the telephone pole and none of them know how to deal with this.

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