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Poll: Who Should Be Leader of HM Most Loyal Opposition?
This poll is closed.
Jeremy Corbyn 95 18.63%
Dennis Skinner 53 10.39%
Angus Robertson 20 3.92%
Tim Farron 9 1.76%
Paul Ukips 7 1.37%
Robot Lenin 105 20.59%
Tony Blair 28 5.49%
Pissflaps 193 37.84%
Total: 510 votes
[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

 
  • Locked thread
Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal
This is the month of the final countdown to the beginning of the triggering of the Article 5-Oh. The whirlwind is in the thorn tree, the virgins are all trimming their wicks, it's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, etc.


After the Supreme Court ruling says they have a say, MPs back the unamended Brexit Bill by 498 votes to 114, with 47 Labour rebels voting against Corbyn's three line whip and a quarter of Lib Dems (2) defying their own party.
Tony Blair makes a speech in London, urging opponents of Brexit to "rise up" and murder Iraqi children ban things instead of improving lives fight to change the minds of the public about leaving the EU.
Labour crush Paul Nuttall while he was urinating on fans at bet365 Stadium, but lose Copeland to a Tory because Corbyn hates Sellafield.
The Lords voted down Peter Hain's attempt to amend the Article 50 Bill to keep UK in Single Market 299 to 136. Labour Lards overwhelmingly voted with the Government.

What else is in the news?
• Plans for building more homes in England are revealed, after ministers admit the housing market is 'broken'. Nothing is said about affordability though.
• The European Commission issues a so-called 'final warning' to the United Kingdom over the breaching of air pollution limits. Brexiteers respond with lol gently caress them we'll kill ourselves if we want to.
• Compleat Dick is appointed Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police, becoming the first woman to murder a Brazilian electrician in Britain and be commended for it.
• Gerald Kaufman, the oldest most Jewish anti-zionist Labour MP, has died, prompting another by-election, this time in Manchester Gorton.
• New elections to the Northern Ireland Assembly are going to be held tomorrow, in order to find out who is going to be responsible for heating the horse solaria.
• A stupid 12-sided piece of poo poo will still replace the pound coin, even after roast beef flavour polymer notes have proven successful.
• Brexit countdown: 30 days. Brexit plans released: 70 words w/o header and some supplementary paperwork. Brexit means: gently caress You.



March Madness

National Pig Day
UKMT February 2017 Thread
UKMT January 2017 Thread
UKMT December 2016 Thread
UKMT November 2016 Thread
UKMT October 2016

Human Rights Day
Brexit Thread

International Whisky Day
Scotpol Thread

Poison Prevention Week
EDL/Fash Thread

Ash Wednesday
Europol Thread

World Day Against Cyber Censorship
Paedogeddon/Press Corruption Thread

March Fenland Station
Trainchat Thread

World Theatre Day
Political Cartoons Thread

Amavasya
#ukgoons on synIRC (thanks crispix).

Freedom of Information Day

quote:

1. It's not a person's fault if they are poor;
2. It's not their fault if they are disabled;
3. Neo-liberalism doesn't work;
4. The Daily Mail lies (maybe even about Pig Dave and charity);
5. Neo-liberalism has never worked;
6. The British Empire was not a force for good;
7. Neo-liberalism will never work;
8. Trans people are not "men in dresses";
9. Gendered insults are not okay;
10. If something is "so gay" it had better be something that is really happy;
11. Trains are awesome;
12. The history of all hitherto existing society is the history of class struggles;
13. Ni dieu, ni maξtre, nae hope.

And Finally:
Shocking evidence of smut in our schools. I bet some of you even played with this filth as children without knowing what it was called.

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Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008

No...
Clapping Larry
You know, I watched some news show on BBC One with a panel talking about stuff and there were stupid tories, some racist gently caress UKIP thing, and Peter Coates, who actually sounded very reasonable. I don't know if it was because the rest of the people surrounding him were horrible human beings but considering that kind of people is currently the majority power, I wouldn't mind him becoming PM thanks to some ancient imperial football law or something.

But to be fair, these days "sounding reasonable" amounts to something like "hey guys I know I'm reaching here but maybe murdering all the poors is bad???"

hakimashou
Jul 15, 2002
Upset Trowel
Corbyn should resign so someone else can have a shot at running the labour party.

Tesseraction
Apr 5, 2009

I offer myself to lead the Labour party as a silent cardboard box covered in memes.

Comrade Cheggorsky
Aug 20, 2011


posting on the ground floor of the article 50 thread

ShaneMacGowansTeeth
May 22, 2007



I think this is it... I think this is how it ends
you know it

Looke
Aug 2, 2013

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:
I feel like April Fools Day will have a more pertinent meaning this year.

Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008

No...
Clapping Larry
https://www.theguardian.com/money/2017/feb/28/tory-1bn-inheritance-tax-cut-will-worsen-north-south-divide

Let's start on a good note here with an inheritance tax cut which will clearly help fund the struggling NHS and expand infrastructure investment.

Lord of the Llamas
Jul 9, 2002

EULER'VE TO SEE IT VENN SOMEONE CALLS IT THE WRONG THING AND PROVOKES MY WRATH
Sigh.

and i must meme
Jan 15, 2017

Pochoclo posted:

https://www.theguardian.com/money/2017/feb/28/tory-1bn-inheritance-tax-cut-will-worsen-north-south-divide

Let's start on a good note here with an inheritance tax cut which will clearly help fund the struggling NHS and expand infrastructure investment.

class war now imo

Jrbg
May 20, 2014

EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A NOTIFICATION INTO THE UK'S CONSTITUTION. ITS THE TRIGGERING OF ARTICLE 50 AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, RIDDICK. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN WHOOSHING SOUNDS WHEN I SLAM DOWN SOME NECRO BASTARDS OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP TECHNIQUE. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY ESCAPED THE GALAXYS MOST DANGEROUS PRISON (THE EU). I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUTLOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN MY INTERNATIONAL COMMUNITY AND ALL THEY DO IS PROVE HEADS OF STATE CAN STILL BE IMMATURE JEKRS. AND IVE LEARNED ALL THE LINES AND IVE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE MYSELF AND MY COUNTRY LESS LONELY BY SHOUTING EM ALL. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNIng

LemonDrizzle
Mar 28, 2012

neoliberal shithead
https://twitter.com/faisalislam/status/836731456995135489

Coohoolin
Aug 5, 2012

Oor Coohoolie.
This is what's hosed my application and loads of others', Comprehensive Sickness Insurance. gently caress the home office. gently caress it hard.

https://www.freemovement.org.uk/comprehensive-sickness-insurance-what-is-it-and-who-needs-it/

Tesseraction
Apr 5, 2009


Britain.... bad????????

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

Britain Grating.

jabby
Oct 27, 2010

Ken Loach has written a good article about why blaming the current state of Labour entirely on Corbyn is a ridiculously simplistic view at best. He talks about how neither of the recent candidates were willing to campaign with Momentum or attend their events, and how the PLP as a whole isn't just rebelling against Corbyn but rebelling against his policies. They refuse to talk about them, refuse to campaign on them, and won't even endorse them in interviews. The party is fundamentally paralysed while we have elected representatives who refuse to represent the membership.

Kokoro Wish
Jul 23, 2007

Post? What post? Oh wow.
I had nothing to do with THAT.

jabby posted:

Ken Loach has written a good article about why blaming the current state of Labour entirely on Corbyn is a ridiculously simplistic view at best. He talks about how neither of the recent candidates were willing to campaign with Momentum or attend their events, and how the PLP as a whole isn't just rebelling against Corbyn but rebelling against his policies. They refuse to talk about them, refuse to campaign on them, and won't even endorse them in interviews. The party is fundamentally paralysed while we have elected representatives who refuse to represent the membership.

Stopped reading the Guardian quite a while ago, so I would have missed this. Thankee.

jBrereton
May 30, 2013
Grimey Drawer
Reminder that Northern Ireland is technically in the UK, here was their leaders' debate (although PBPA was ROBBED of a podium) http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b08h1jqj/northern-ireland-elections-2017-the-leaders-debate

(Colum Eastwood would be a perfectly acceptable Leader of the Opposition)

Percipient Badger
Mar 21, 2008
Recent news wise there hasn't been anything in the last couple of threads about our dirty little secret - the failing prison system. Surprised as there has been a lot more coverage recently & the hidden (sorry, I mean prison) service typically gets bugger all press.

Cuts endemic to the nasty party if applied to some other service would have shut said service down. Out of sight, out of mind I suppose. Easy to tear chunks out of what the public can't see & don't much care for or understand. Boo.

ronya
Nov 8, 2010

I'm the normal one.

You hate ridden fucks will regret your words when you eventually grow up.

Peace.

jabby posted:

Ken Loach has written a good article about why blaming the current state of Labour entirely on Corbyn is a ridiculously simplistic view at best. He talks about how neither of the recent candidates were willing to campaign with Momentum or attend their events, and how the PLP as a whole isn't just rebelling against Corbyn but rebelling against his policies. They refuse to talk about them, refuse to campaign on them, and won't even endorse them in interviews. The party is fundamentally paralysed while we have elected representatives who refuse to represent the membership.

E L E C T A B I L I T Y

I dunno. I feel like Loach, of all people, would be quite familiar with the exhausting and pointless nature of arguing over whether there exists this secret silent socialist plurality just waiting to be tapped at the general election, or whether it's just an outcome of the vagaries of suitably vague polling - reflecting a transient sentiment that evaporates when it becomes clear that anybody who will put forth said nationalizations is also going to to prioritize trade union strikes over service users, or that anybody who puts forth higher taxes will also refuse to cut the foreign aid/EU contribution/houses for terror preachers fund that exists somewhere in the minds of the median voter

probably from the former side rather than the latter, because he's ken goddamn loach, but he can't possibly be unfamiliar with the endless, pointless debate

bitching that the plp is divergent from the membership has been a thing ever since there has been a plp, even back when the membership were delegates and not members in themselves. that's not new.

he's right that this can't be pinned on Corbyn, but his prescription is no fresher than it was in the 1970s. rather, the malaise amongst social democratic parties is so widespread in the developed world that it's suggestive of structural political factors, not personality politics

ronya fucked around with this message at 07:22 on Mar 1, 2017

Grouchio
Aug 31, 2014

Is it a lie for Scotsmen?

kingturnip
Apr 18, 2008

Percipient Badger posted:

Recent news wise there hasn't been anything in the last couple of threads about our dirty little secret - the failing prison system. Surprised as there has been a lot more coverage recently & the hidden (sorry, I mean prison) service typically gets bugger all press.

Cuts endemic to the nasty party if applied to some other service would have shut said service down. Out of sight, out of mind I suppose. Easy to tear chunks out of what the public can't see & don't much care for or understand. Boo.

I imagine what's great about prisons from a Tory point of view is that, for the public, it's the equivalent of 'The Only Moral Abortion'. Everyone in prison is there because they're an unrepentant, dangerous sack of poo poo apart from anyone I like, who's there by mistake.
Therefore, no-one actually cares all that much about cuts that harm prisoners.

Y'know, other than anyone who thinks rehabilitation is worthwhile, or who realises how loving expensive it is to keep prisoners in prison, even after you've cut things to the bone.

communism bitch
Apr 24, 2009
Last thread but...

quote:

Since it's quiet again, here's something else from the archives: A UKIP FAQ, circa 1998 - http://web.archive.org/web/19981207...oulsby/ukip.htm. I like this part:

ukip posted:

Q What is your alternative to being a member of the EU?

A This is a trick question. The alternative to committing suicide is simply not to commit suicide. It is not to become a ballet dancer or a lion tamer.
Poor Voltaire must be spinning in his loving grave to be ripped off by these halfwits :cripes:

Pistol_Pete
Sep 15, 2007

Oven Wrangler

ronya posted:


he's right that this can't be pinned on Corbyn, but his prescription is no fresher than it was in the 1970s. rather, the malaise amongst social democratic parties is so widespread in the developed world that it's suggestive of structural political factors, not personality politics

In The UK specifically, the electoral coalition that bought Labour to power in 1997 is now terminally fractured. Going from North to South:

Scottish Labour voters: defected to the SNP in the wake of the independence referendum. Now see Labour as intolerably London-based and unwilling or unable to fight for Scottish interests.

Working class traditional Labour voters in the North & Midlands: their support has been draining away since 1997, due to Labour largely focusing on middle class issues during this period. Ed Miliband and Corbyn have both tried to do something about this but have been hampered by the fact that these voters don't think much of them personally and see them as part of the problem.

Liberal urban voters (a bit of a broad category this, covering everything from students, to poor inner city dwellers, to relatively well-off people in middle class professions. Concentrated in London and big, successful cities like Bristol, Manchester etc). The only group where Labour's support has held up pretty well.

Conservative-minded, comfortably placed voters in the south-east, who generally go for the Tories but can be persuaded to vote Labour (as in 1997): sticking solidly to the Tories right now.

Labour's problem is that society has moved on since the 90's and all four of these groups now want wildly divergent and often completely incompatible things. Take immigration, for example: Scottish Labour voters and urban liberal types tend to be ok with it, while traditional Labour voters and south-eastern conservative types are more likely to be very much against it. There's literally no policy Labour could come up with on immigration that all four groups would be cool with. Multiply this across every policy area and you start to see the scale of the problem that Labour has. If Corbyn stepped down tomorrow, these fundamental cleavages in the groups that sustained Labour in power for so long would still be as stark as ever.

So, essay question: Could the electoral coalition that swept Labour to power in '97 ever be replicated, or was it a one-off event rooted in a specific time and set of political and social circumstances? Discuss.

Percipient Badger
Mar 21, 2008

kingturnip posted:

I imagine what's great about prisons from a Tory point of view is that, for the public, it's the equivalent of 'The Only Moral Abortion'. Everyone in prison is there because they're an unrepentant, dangerous sack of poo poo apart from anyone I like, who's there by mistake.
Therefore, no-one actually cares all that much about cuts that harm prisoners.

Y'know, other than anyone who thinks rehabilitation is worthwhile, or who realises how loving expensive it is to keep prisoners in prison, even after you've cut things to the bone.

I admit I've got a vested interest in the service; what disappoints me is that the horrendous statistics reported about assaults on staff etc go undiscussed everywhere; Parliament don't give a poo poo & every mouth breathing daily mail reader assumes that officers are well remunerated institutional thugs.

Pistol_Pete
Sep 15, 2007

Oven Wrangler

Percipient Badger posted:

Recent news wise there hasn't been anything in the last couple of threads about our dirty little secret - the failing prison system. Surprised as there has been a lot more coverage recently & the hidden (sorry, I mean prison) service typically gets bugger all press.


After watching the eye-popping undercover Panorama documentary on the state of our prisons, it's pretty clear that the whole system could be engulfed in catastrophic riots at any moment.

Retarded Goatee
Feb 6, 2010
I spent :10bux: so that means I can be a cheapskate and post about posting instead of having some wit or spending any more on comedy avs for people. Which I'm also incapable of. Comedy.
Did the UK turn into a backdrop for the new Mad Max movie or do I have to give the neolibs more time?

Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008

No...
Clapping Larry

Retarded Goatee posted:

Did the UK turn into a backdrop for the new Mad Max movie or do I have to give the neolibs more time?

Wait ~3 years, until all the protections afforded by the EU vaporize and the UK becomes equivalent to China in workers' rights and social policies, but without its massive industry base.
I don't think it's going to be Mad Max, I'm thinking more banana republic but without bananas and with shittier weather.

TACD
Oct 27, 2000

The dorky OCD bit of my brain appreciates that you posted the OP bang on the stroke of midnight :)

Percipient Badger
Mar 21, 2008

Pistol_Pete posted:

After watching the eye-popping undercover Panorama documentary on the state of our prisons, it's pretty clear that the whole system could be engulfed in catastrophic riots at any moment.

Not watched it. Don't really feel the need to. However since you said that I've had a gander on YouTube, it's been uploaded there. Had to close it as the comment section (not the best cross section of society I know) made me turn a bit red. To quote a snippet "Some of the prison guards are letting the drugs in and making a load of money while the Government turn a blind eye". Indicative of a lot of comments on public forums with regards to the situation. The internet is the worst place.

Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008

No...
Clapping Larry

Percipient Badger posted:

Not watched it. Don't really feel the need to. However since you said that I've had a gander on YouTube, it's been uploaded there. Had to close it as the comment section (not the best cross section of society I know) made me turn a bit red. To quote a snippet "Some of the prison guards are letting the drugs in and making a load of money while the Government turn a blind eye". Indicative of a lot of comments on public forums with regards to the situation. The internet is the worst place.

Wait, isn't that actually the case? I'm not saying every prison guard smuggles drugs, but certainly a small minority of them do indeed turn a blind eye. Or am I missing something here?

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
is there any particular reason farage is starting a fight against carswell?

GEORGE W BUSHI
Jul 1, 2012

Jose posted:

is there any particular reason farage is starting a fight against carswell?

He thinks Carswell isn't trying hard enough to get him knighted. Seriously.

Like there's more to the animosity than that, but that's why they're fighting right now.

E: it might actually be a peerage that Farage wants.

GEORGE W BUSHI fucked around with this message at 08:49 on Mar 1, 2017

Party Boat
Nov 1, 2007

where did that other dog come from

who is he


I thought Farage initially wanted a peerage but switched to a knighthood after realising that becoming a Lord would require him to step down as an MEP

ThaumPenguin
Oct 9, 2013

I bailed early on in the February thread but I assume everything's been going alright in the Britain Isles since then

Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008

No...
Clapping Larry

Baron Corbyn posted:

E: it might actually be attention that Farage wants.

fixed

baka kaba
Jul 19, 2003

PLEASE ASK ME, THE SELF-PROFESSED NO #1 PAUL CATTERMOLE FAN IN THE SOMETHING AWFUL S-CLUB 7 MEGATHREAD, TO NAME A SINGLE SONG BY HIS EXCELLENT NU-METAL SIDE PROJECT, SKUA, AND IF I CAN'T PLEASE TELL ME TO
EAT SHIT

Percipient Badger posted:

Recent news wise there hasn't been anything in the last couple of threads about our dirty little secret - the failing prison system. Surprised as there has been a lot more coverage recently & the hidden (sorry, I mean prison) service typically gets bugger all press.

Maybe I'm just noticing it more but every issue lately seems to be presented as a pay issue. Obviously the government has an interest in pretending that's all anyone cares about, but the news feels like it's dutifully running with that angle a lot more, and the union side gets reduced to whatever they have to say about pay even when it's not the core of the dispute

Anyway everything I've seen on prisons has basically been "the problems are staff levels, the government has committed to offering higher salaries to attract people, problem solved". There's barely been any mention of underfunding and the systemic issues

Pochoclo posted:

Wait, isn't that actually the case? I'm not saying every prison guard smuggles drugs, but certainly a small minority of them do indeed turn a blind eye. Or am I missing something here?

It's not really the issue is it? It's the tabloid mentality of deflecting onto a scapegoat, like when serious welfare problems are shouted down with TEN-CHILDREN FAMILY GETS MANSION or DISABILITY CHEAT'S SECRET CIRCUS ACT

baka kaba fucked around with this message at 09:04 on Mar 1, 2017

Namtab
Feb 22, 2010

ronya posted:

E L E C T A B I L I T Y

I dunno. I feel like Loach, of all people, would be quite familiar with the exhausting and pointless nature of arguing over whether there exists this secret silent socialist plurality just waiting to be tapped at the general election, or whether it's just an outcome of the vagaries of suitably vague polling - reflecting a transient sentiment that evaporates when it becomes clear that anybody who will put forth said nationalizations is also going to to prioritize trade union strikes over service users, or that anybody who puts forth higher taxes will also refuse to cut the foreign aid/EU contribution/houses for terror preachers fund that exists somewhere in the minds of the median voter

probably from the former side rather than the latter, because he's ken goddamn loach, but he can't possibly be unfamiliar with the endless, pointless debate

bitching that the plp is divergent from the membership has been a thing ever since there has been a plp, even back when the membership were delegates and not members in themselves. that's not new.

he's right that this can't be pinned on Corbyn, but his prescription is no fresher than it was in the 1970s. rather, the malaise amongst social democratic parties is so widespread in the developed world that it's suggestive of structural political factors, not personality politics

Meanwhile, the merits of conservatism continue to help everyone.

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Namtab
Feb 22, 2010

Jose posted:

is there any particular reason farage is starting a fight against carswell?

Far age didn't get knighted and carswell made fun of him for it.

  • Locked thread