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Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Seaniqua posted:

Welp, 32 years. 32 years before I knew this.

I think the problem is, in cartoons, they'd use a sink plunger for the toliet.



Everynow and then, I start thinking about making a website that would contain information that everyone expects you to know as an adult, but that no one ever bothered to tell you.

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Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
butts to butts
asses to asses

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

So, is it illegal to give your children tranqs?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Poor Freckles, thought of ants got dick cancer and died

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Assign values to each one, and roll a couple percentage die.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

VendaGoat posted:

We don't need no stinking werebadgers!

No, There castle, there badger.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
All the nice and friendly stuff escaped from Austrilia and made it to the islands. New Zealand is all chill and poo poo.

Com to think of it, Where is OLD Zealand?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Because cats always land on their feet.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Yeah, FRESH rear end. Not moldy rear end!

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Powaqoatse posted:

something, a joke that involves the horse hitting a key on the keyboard that makes it a pun

"Poor old Freckles, thought of an Ampersand and died."

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Bendydick Crumplesnatch
Burlington Coatfactory
Benadryl Cucumberpatch

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Solice Kirsk posted:

Out of all the old 80's movies that are getting remakes and sequels why isn't Willow one of them? I love that movie. I blame Willow and Legend for making me like fantasy books and games.

Do you know how expensive it is to hire an entire villages worth of midgets? Their union has gotten SAVAGE since then.
Course, they could go the oompa loopma treatment and get one person to play everyone.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Wait....you're not supposed to eat that stuff?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Que?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Sounds like you really made an impression on it

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
That dog is gonna need a therapy dog of it's own.


Therapy Ferret?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Tiny Lowtax posted:

I actually agree wth you. Looks kind of like a generic click bait type site now.

Because it was bought out by George Soros and is 100% untrustworthy now?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Enola Gay-For-Pay posted:

I gotta admit, if furries looked like this instead of lovely cartoon characters I'd take them a lot more seriously.

Its like a cover to a heavy metal album.

Except that "sword" is just pathetic.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Hot Smart ARYAN Girl posted:

please tell us what sword would be better and post a picture of yourself with one

Look, if you're a ripped lion-man with bat wings, you need something a little beefier in the sword department.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Well.



That is certainly a thing.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Guy Goodbody posted:

You do understand that there are some people who bake more than just for themselves? Like, there are some people who bake professionally, and they make far more baked goods than they could ever eat, but then they sell those baked goods to other people

Yes but

A: It's Cinnabon icing from TACO BELL
B: Where did he get that giant drum from?
C: Bakers generally don't have to haul their supplies on the bus.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
THis is all moot anyway because a container that big of frosting is heavier than a man of that stature could carry, and I don't see a 2 wheeled dolly anywhere.
Nah, that thing is empty. Now, the question is, what is he going to put IN that tube?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Christ, having flashbacks here. I remember the first time that picture was posted and the exact same conversation happened, including the mspaint.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
"Drink more Ovaltine"

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Crikey Heifer! I've locked meself out!

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Yeah, I thought I'd paint the rumpus room in Dad.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Screaming Idiot posted:

I heard in recent reprints they changed the art to be as bland as the stories they're based upon. :(

Man, I don't know if that is good or bad. Those images loving haunted me for goddamn yeaaaars.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
I was at a flea market that had a big bin with a ton of 1960s era pulp sci-fi novels in it.
They were wanting two bucks a book so I said gently caress it. If they were like 3 for a dollar, I'd have snatched a ton up.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

funmanguy posted:

On sundays before noon. Only Jesus is allowed to drink on sundays before noon.

Only way to get rid of his hungover.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Gas will loving chew through styrofoam though.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Well, I think we can probably predict his nickname.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
You could have just said the bands loving name, you insufferable sperglords.
Who the gently caress knows the lead singers name of some C list 80s band that had maybe 2 hits.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Two questions:

Is that guys name "Owl City"?

And


Is that an anime dance?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Fried Watermelon posted:

owl city is the singer every 12 year old girl loves

that is a black person not anime

Okay but is that guy Owl City or what
I'm sorry I don't hang around 12 year old girls or keep up with their current likes/dislikes.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Big ole Silverbacks got tiny wittle dongers

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
So, Hitler had the right idea, then?

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

I like that guy has one hand out like he was in the middle of saying " Don't touch that" but it was too late

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Comptroll The Forums posted:

*inside of card* Dad oval office, so what?

Sorry, but it's actually a self-help book.

" So, your dad has a oval office: Navigating today's gender minefield."

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Strudel Man posted:

Well, if you're talking to one in person, you should still call them Italian.

Is this it? The most perfect post....EVER?!

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Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

" Pop-pop got a disease that made his head 10% smaller every year."

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