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Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves
Geop eat the brownie

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Teledahn
May 14, 2009

What is that bear doing there?


gschmidl posted:

To bring this full circle, I had onion ice cream in Tropea, Italy, a town famous for its sweetish red onions.

But how did-

Mzbundifund posted:

But how did it taste?

:golfclap:

Xenoveritas
May 9, 2010
Dinosaur Gum

Detective Thompson
Nov 9, 2007

Sammy Davis Jr. Jr. is also in repose.
Geop, eat the moon! Quick!

Fredrik1
Jan 22, 2005

Gopherslayer
:rock:
Fallen Rib

Detective Thompson posted:

Geop, eat the moon! Quick!

MOD CHALLENGE: Detective Thompson eat the moon

Miz Kriss
Mar 17, 2009

It's only an avatar if the Cubs get swept.

Fredrik1 posted:

MOD CHALLENGE: Detective Thompson eat the moon

Is it made of cheese?

Geemer
Nov 4, 2010



Miz Kriss posted:

Is it made of cheese?

Yes, but it is casu marzu.

Detective Thompson
Nov 9, 2007

Sammy Davis Jr. Jr. is also in repose.
Oh no! The one cheese I swore I would never eat.

Sorry about the moon crashing into Clock Town, guys, but I just can't do it.

gschmidl
Sep 3, 2011

watch with knife hands

Teledahn posted:

But how did-


:golfclap:

Weird, like the onion taste was kind of "floating" on top of the ice cream, but not bad.

double nine
Aug 8, 2013

Geemer posted:

Yes, but it is casu marzu.

quote:

Casu marzu (Sardinian pronunciation: [ˈkazu ˈmard͡zu], also called casu modde, casu cundķdu and casu frązigu in Sardinian language, or in Italian formaggio marcio), literally translating into English as "rotten/putrid cheese", is a traditional Sardinian sheep milk cheese, notable for containing live insect larvae (maggots). Although found in the island of Sardinia, a variety of this cheese is also found in the nearby Corsica, where it goes by the name of casgiu merzu.[1]

:stonk:

Xenoveritas
May 9, 2010
Dinosaur Gum
But that's not the best part.

quote:

When disturbed, the larvae can launch themselves for distances up to 15 cm (6 in).

Kangra
May 7, 2012

No, the best part is this:

http://jamanetwork.com/journals/jama/article-abstract/314735

quote:

...had attacks of severe pain in the abdomen, radiating to the back and downward to the left thigh. At this time he had noticed blood and mucus as well as small white "worms" in the stool.

Fedule
Mar 27, 2010


No one left uncured.
I got you.
Okay, so before we get to the judgement, a callout:

Alexeythegreat posted:

I'll eat a raw onion on video (it's not like I'm hiding my face, and there's a positive side effect of living in the FSBland in that no psycho from the US can touch me)
Give me until April 11th to arrange

an arrangement

I'll eat it with a spoon

This is a :toxx:

:colbert:

Anyway.


To business.


Okay, so. Obviously, you have not Eaten The Onion. No getting around it; this is a point of contention. I also did not like your submission very much. It is an automatic fail.

I am, however, not going to ban you, for two reasons. Firstly, AJ_Impy made a reasonable case for clemency; it is admitted that I overestimated the ease with which you could procure or produce The Onion, though I do think you still might have made a better effort all told. The second reason is... well, the hunger for onion-eating has been sated, and how.

What a perfect segue into the results!

We've had piecemeal (ahaha) approximations:


We've had some tasty looking substitutes:


We've had spirited deconstructions:


We've had creative interpretations:


We've had haute cuisine:


Inevitably, we've had the genuine article:


But.

One goon has gone above and beyond. We said it wasn't necessary. We said not that it couldn't, but that it shouldn't be done. This was needless. We didn't ask for this. And yet. And yet.


Mother of God.

Xenoveritas, you are the worthy winner of this Mod Challenge, and so it falls to you to choose cis autodrag's fate... again, because although I gotta give you mad props for literally spelling the word "Ban" in horrific onion detritus, that option is explicitly off the table. Short of that, though... Long break? Short break? An onion-based BRCT? Some other creative thing (subject to mod approval)? I'm sure lots of people are about to chime in with suggestions, but the choice is yours! Choose wisely!

Thanks to everyone who took part!

Fedule fucked around with this message at 00:36 on Apr 14, 2017

Mega64
May 23, 2008

I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.
My suggestion: Onion avatar to forever mark OP's shame.

Also, confession time: OP PMed me and asked if they could make this thread, and I OK'd it because I thought, "What's the worst that could happen?" :smithicide:

Kuvo
Oct 27, 2008

Blame it on the misfortune of your bark!
Fun Shoe

Mega64 posted:

"What's the worst that could happen?"

geop could refuse to eat the onion

Zanna
Oct 9, 2012
Aww, I didn't even get a mention. Guess I should have actually posted my pics instead of just linking to a gallery.

Geop
Oct 26, 2007

Kuvo posted:

geop could refuse to eat the onion
why would he ever do such a thing

Jen X
Sep 29, 2014

To bring light to the darkness, whether that darkness be ignorance, injustice, apathy, or stagnation.

Geop posted:

why would he ever do such a thing

lack of integrity, imo

Fedule
Mar 27, 2010


No one left uncured.
I got you.

Zanna posted:

Aww, I didn't even get a mention. Guess I should have actually posted my pics instead of just linking to a gallery.

Oh my god I'm sorry I completely missed your post when I was rounding up the submissions. You did good!

Araxxor
Oct 20, 2012

My disdain for you all knows no bounds.

Mega64 posted:

My suggestion: Onion avatar to forever mark OP's shame.

I agree with this.

vv I also agree with this.

Araxxor fucked around with this message at 00:36 on Apr 14, 2017

Jen X
Sep 29, 2014

To bring light to the darkness, whether that darkness be ignorance, injustice, apathy, or stagnation.
I suggest a 6 hour probation with a picture of a blooming onion, along with the avatar.

That way, the shame will endure even after a 5 dollar contribution to Lowtax's alcohol fund.

nutri_void
Apr 18, 2015

I shall devour your soul.
Grimey Drawer

Fedule posted:

Okay, so before we get to the judgement, a callout:


:colbert:

You're right.

In the end, I managed to eat about half an onion, and only managed to do it today due to working literally 16 hours a day for the entire last week. I did eat it with a spoon and I did show off my Green Lantern shirt. I still feel the nasty warmth in my esophagus as I write these words.

Edit: fixed the link, hopefully

nutri_void fucked around with this message at 19:21 on Apr 14, 2017

Herr Tog
Jun 18, 2011

Grimey Drawer

Alexeythegreat posted:

You're right.

In the end, I managed to eat about half an onion, and only managed to do it today due to working literally 16 hours a day for the entire last week. I did eat it with a spoon and I did show off my Green Lantern shirt. I still feel the nasty warmth in my esophagus as I write these words.

That link is as non-functioning as Geops ability to eat the onion

Also I vote just a probation or to do an LP. A PROPER LP

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

Mega64 posted:

My suggestion: Onion avatar to forever mark OP's shame.

Also, confession time: OP PMed me and asked if they could make this thread, and I OK'd it because I thought, "What's the worst that could happen?" :smithicide:

Did you consider what was the BEST that could happen though? Cause all things considered you're the guy who green lit a gold mined thread.

Sally
Jan 9, 2007


Don't post Small Dash!

GeneX posted:

I suggest a 6 hour probation with a picture of a blooming onion, along with the avatar.

That way, the shame will endure even after a 5 dollar contribution to Lowtax's alcohol fund.

this is a good idea

except the probation should be longer. blood for the blooming onion gods!

Nidoking
Jan 27, 2009

I fought the lava, and the lava won.

Alexeythegreat posted:

You're right.

In the end, I managed to eat about half an onion, and only managed to do it today due to working literally 16 hours a day for the entire last week. I did eat it with a spoon and I did show off my Green Lantern shirt. I still feel the nasty warmth in my esophagus as I write these words.

Fixed link

Might want to add subtitles, though, because I can't hear a thing.

Xenoveritas
May 9, 2010
Dinosaur Gum
I'd be more inclined to be more lenient if cis autodrag had eaten some form of fried onion product. Sure, you're lucky enough that Outback Steakhouse has left that part of the world. But I find it hard to believe that you couldn't find any place to just snap a few pictures of some form of onion something and call it "close enough." That being said, you did do ... something, which involved some amount of effort beyond nothing, so I'll go with "Bloomin' Onion related avatar and short probation."

Herr Tog
Jun 18, 2011

Grimey Drawer

Xenoveritas posted:

I'd be more inclined to be more lenient if cis autodrag had eaten some form of fried onion product. Sure, you're lucky enough that Outback Steakhouse has left that part of the world. But I find it hard to believe that you couldn't find any place to just snap a few pictures of some form of onion something and call it "close enough." That being said, you did do ... something, which involved some amount of effort beyond nothing, so I'll go with "Bloomin' Onion related avatar and short probation."

We got a world tour LP update. With LeBron James! I get other people ate the onion and they should be commended. Y'all did more than I could and I am inspired and shamed. Eat the onion. BUT we should not make it out to be as though no effort was made on the challenged's part. Also, yes, goldmined. I think a most lasting contribution would be a probate with an funny image but then also more LP for the LP subforum.

Anaxite
Jan 16, 2009

What? What'd you say? Stop channeling? I didn't he-

Xenoveritas posted:

I'd be more inclined to be more lenient if cis autodrag had eaten some form of fried onion product. Sure, you're lucky enough that Outback Steakhouse has left that part of the world. But I find it hard to believe that you couldn't find any place to just snap a few pictures of some form of onion something and call it "close enough." That being said, you did do ... something, which involved some amount of effort beyond nothing, so I'll go with "Bloomin' Onion related avatar and short probation."

Something like this?

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Sally
Jan 9, 2007


Don't post Small Dash!
goldmine

Materant
Jul 22, 2010

see, what you don't understand is he now has

THE MANLIEST MUSTACHE

it defies physics



:same:

Xenoveritas
May 9, 2010
Dinosaur Gum

Anaxite posted:

Something like this?



I like this. Does anyone have a good suggestion for a title to go along with it? I'm trying to come up with the worst pun I can, something involving onions and three points and possibly Sharon Needles since that's apparently who cis autodrag's avatar is.

Kuvo
Oct 27, 2008

Blame it on the misfortune of your bark!
Fun Shoe
layers of posting so bad it makes you cry

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007

SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?
Yam Slacker

Kuvo posted:

layers of posting so bad it makes you cry

"3 Layers of pointless posting so bad it makes you cry", maybe?

Herr Tog
Jun 18, 2011

Grimey Drawer

Kuvo posted:

layers of posting so bad it makes you cry

3 layers of ironic posting that few could eat

Blue Labrador
Feb 17, 2011

Herr Tog posted:

3 layers of ironic posting that few could eat

I like this. It pays its dues to the brilliant marketing of the original onion and--due to the pointedness of its snark--has a certain poignancy as a punishment.

Scaly Haylie
Dec 25, 2004

Kuvo posted:

layers of posting so bad it makes you cry

Just because they didn't eat the onion doesn't mean we have to brand them as a bad poster.

Teledahn
May 14, 2009

What is that bear doing there?


Lizard Wizard posted:

Just because they didn't eat the onion doesn't mean we have to brand them as a bad poster.
It doesn't make them a good poster.

MR. J
Nov 22, 2011

Chuck and Fuck

Herr Tog posted:

3 layers of ironic posting that few could eat stomach.

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Frogfingers
Oct 10, 2012
Fun fact guys: Outback Steakhouse actually franchises in Australia with an identical menu, and much like how The Swedish Chef in Sweden is Danish, Outback Steakhouse is rebranded as: Lone Star Steakhouse.

Also don't eat at Outback Steakhouse guys, they are patrons of their very own Republican PAC.

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