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- I have a vague memory from when I was two or three of sitting in the shower and rationalizing that if I pooped, the poop would strain down the drain. It did not. - In first grade, I remember explaining to my friends that Noah's ark was proof unicorns were real. I think this is kinda common for little Christian-raised kids, but I thought it was genius and just SO obvious. - Also believed toys had feelings. My mom told me to only pick up toys I was sure I wanted to buy because if I kept switching them, they'd have their feelings hurt. They thought they had a chance to be loved but I had implied weren't good enough. I'm not sure if this was a lesson in compassion or to make me quit bringing her toys. - My sister would hide in the closet and stick out a furry earmuff. This was the paw of the O Great Easter Bunny and it would get me if I displeased it. - An all-white cow meant the apocalypse. (???) - A solar eclipse meant the zombie apocalypse, which was different from the regular apocalypse. (???) - IT was in the sewers and would grab me if I stood on a grate or a manhole cover too long. And all clowns were IT, so I flipped out on Halloween and at a children's hospital.
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Mar 27, 2017 20:12
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| # ¿ May 1, 2024 22:06 |
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smug n stuff posted:You got the color wrong, but an all-red cow born in Israel is a genuine end-times sign in some religions I think, maybe that's where you got this from? That's gotta be it. No idea who I knew that was Jewish, but the idea cropped up before I was 7 and all religions followed the same blob of a god at that age. a bone to pick posted:Amazingly, I have friends who will believe and try this out and they're in their late 20s, it never turns out well. What's worse is they admit to it. I'd bury that shame with the dinosaurs. Das Boo fucked around with this message at 20:26 on Mar 27, 2017 |
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Mar 27, 2017 20:24
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Oh, for some reason when I was four I thought "cable" was "canine." So upon observing a big cable bridge we crossed on the regular, I proudly announced "Wow, look at all those canines!" And of course no one knew what the hell.
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Mar 29, 2017 04:25
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HAT FETISH posted:Around the same age I thought radio masts were rockets and every time I saw one while I was in the car with my parents I would count down from ten and shout BLAST OFF!!! and make exploding noises. Soon it became a rule that every time I did that it would mean early bed with no dinner. Didn't stop me. Aw. You count down them rockets, little Hat Fetish! 
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Mar 29, 2017 04:40
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I thought Motown was modern music in the early 90's. My mom would play it every morning when we dropped my sisters off at school and I just thought that's what everybody listened to. When I was 6 or 7, she mentioned she didn't like much music from the early 90's. I went from confusion to realization to embarrassment silently, and in the span of 5 seconds.
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Mar 29, 2017 09:40
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