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The fight scene from John Wick inside John Wick's really nice house but he's actually just preparing dinner really fast and instead of shooting people he's chopping carrots and stuff |
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Jul 7, 2017 06:53
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A store where the salespeople are on commission and hate their jobs and are competing to sell the least and get fired |
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Jul 19, 2017 06:15
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A remake of the 2001 Meg Ryan / Hugh Jackman time-travel rom-com Kate and Leopold where a charming and handsome 19th century gentleman travels through time to present day New York City but is utterly repugnant to everyone he meets because of his goonish 19th century hygiene and his shockingly racist 1870's upbringing. |
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Jul 19, 2017 19:20
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a couple are watching a movie at home and it's like The Ring where it kills you but it only gets one of them because the dude was goofing around on his phone the whole time and wasn't paying attention and doesn't notice until the movie is over. hire me as your writer, Black Mirror |
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Aug 9, 2017 22:50
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free Trapt CD posted:thread about a circus strongman but instead of lifting a barbell or tearing a phone book in half, he is strong enough to work in retail, take his meds regularly, actually return voicemail messages etc. |
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Aug 16, 2017 17:30
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A frustrated person with a sore thumb who doesn't want to draw attention to it |
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Aug 23, 2017 22:15
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Hiking Simulator. Built on the ARMA engine |
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Sep 11, 2017 00:51
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i'm desperate for a men's room but the first two restaurants on this pier that I tried only had bathrooms for "buoys" or "gulls" 
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Sep 16, 2017 23:39
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Olive Garden tonight! posted:the megabloks movie Straight to VHS and Toshiba HD-DVD |
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Sep 21, 2017 03:38
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free Trapt CD posted:descriptions of people that somebody wants you to recognise but the descriptions are of things that are weird and abstract and/or not immediately apparent at sight Hey let's meet up saturday at noon to sell this iphone. It's $400, I'll be in the food court reading reviews of jazz albums on a different phone, and I just got a haircut. I'll be driving a green honda, and it will probably be parked by the Sears entrance about 600 yards away |
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Sep 21, 2017 22:52
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Macnult posted:Old masters who were rejected from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles universe giorgione's cool, but rude caravaggio is a party dude |
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Sep 27, 2017 00:00
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little munchkin posted:i am going to run for president as a member of the "put hundreds of dogs onto a rocketship and have them explore space together" party, which is exactly what it sounds like bad idea, space is a vacuum and dogs are always afraid of those |
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Oct 2, 2017 17:00
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got any sevens posted:Papa you can't stop me anymore, I'm going to run away to plumber school! "Son, your uncle Luigi and I broke bricks with our skulls to get you the coins to pay for your med school. Do not follow my path" |
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Oct 7, 2017 02:22
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Inspired by a thread in TFR The end of the world is upon us, and in the Mad Max wasteland we are all scavengers. The only order remaining is the HOAs populated by busybodies, who continue to enforce petty rules. "Janice was out for an early morning walk with her warhounds and told me that the heads on pikes and spears in our yard violate the bylaws, and that yards need to either have heads on pikes or heads on spears, but cannot mix and match pikes and spears" "The Architecture Committee denied my permit for the new pillboxes, because they say that they are too close together and the flat roof design clashes with the aesthetic of the rest of the compound" "I have to cover militia duty for Rodney, because he's leading a raiding party that day to find hot dogs for the 14th annual summer splash bbq on Saturday" |
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Oct 17, 2017 18:06
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a fantasy sports league for a kids soccer team where you score points based on how much fun the player had and good sportsmanship displayed in that week's game the obsessive parents are screaming at the coaches and refs to give their kid more opportunities to display good sportsmanship |
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Oct 27, 2017 07:17
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Manifisto posted:coach: jared, what is wrong with you? you are yelling insults at the other team, you're shoving and elbowing them when nobody's looking, I've even seen you cheat on a couple of occasions. oof, week 4 we're playing the Dragons. that's amy and jim kowalski's kid's team, it's going to be a tough matchup. we played coach amy's team last year, and they're amazing. she's a pediatric nurse, is on the organizing committee for the special olympics every year, and jim brings a snow cone machine to every game and spends the whole hour making snow cones for both teams. |
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Oct 27, 2017 19:33
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Twenty Four posted:How that one group leaves bibles in the drawers of hotel rooms, but printed out dick pics. Maybe even hidden in the bibles. The Genitals International |
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Nov 12, 2017 20:17
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a cashier with chronic short term memory loss that genuinely laughs his head off at the dad jokes that he gets all day because it's like he's hearing for the first time, every time. "oh, it didn't scan. that means it's free?" did you find everything OK? "everything except a million bucks!" |
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Nov 20, 2017 03:49
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I posted this in the Middle Earth Shadow of War thread. A slick MBA runs an orc army: I run my army as a meritocracy. I feel like those management decisions contribute to a good organizational culture where every orc feels that their contributions are valued and rewarded. I'd also like to congratulate Krakhorn the Moaner on his recent promotion to overlord! Krakhorn is a native of Seregost, and has been with us since the Bright Lord's arrival. He's a natural talent with both sword and club, has a sharp sense of humor, and when he's not beating the shrak out of traitors enjoys playing tennis, baking Elvish food, and learning jazz guitar. Hey Krakhorn, if you ever stop by Cirith Ungol I bet Gubu the Bard could teach you a thing or two! I want address some concerns that I've heard that Krakhorn was "only promoted to warlord because he is a moaner". First, Krakhorn has been with us since level 13, practically day one. Second, he has Legendary traits that are very competitive in the current market and provided exemplary service as the Bright Lord's bodyguard and demonstrated his value during the siege. Third, do not mistake our public commitment towards a diverse army for a policy of "reverse racism" against orcs from groups that have been historically overrepresented in our forces. If anyone feels as though they are experiencing discrimination in the workplace, please bring up these concerns with your warchief during your next career development discussion. If you are uncomfortable speaking to your warchief about it, please use our open door policy to speak with your fortress commander or reach out to me directly. I have set the expectation with all my staff that they treat all these conversations with the appropriate sensitivity and confidentiality. I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank you all for a great third quarter. We are winning in the marketplace, building a great team and some truly amazing fortresses. I recognize that this is the result of all the hard work and dedication from our world class team. |
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Nov 24, 2017 02:44
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got any sevens posted:post the orc beaurocracy thread https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3841595 |
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Nov 24, 2017 03:46
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=leL_bsHEZdM |
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Dec 8, 2017 00:08
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hey I'm sorry I reacted that way, I misheard you and my mind was filled with terrible images of sewer spiders. sorry to hear your father took his own life |
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Dec 24, 2017 07:41
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines (to help him breathe) Raphael is cool but rude And it's not his fault, it's the dementia dude! |
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Dec 26, 2017 02:03
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My dude check out Wiener Circle https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ak4fr18wn2s |
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Jan 9, 2018 18:53
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Jolo posted:Knockoff Hogwarts for Gullible "Wizards" I got my master's degree online from Dogfarts University. It's regionally accredited, just like the ivy league schools are. |
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Jan 10, 2018 23:49
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Bacon Taco posted:What if Cathy was a subversive feminist meme designed to discourage young women from falling into the hellish existence that is low-level corporate work, like being secretaries, by virtue of Cathy being such a sad and unfulfilled lump? Hundreds of women take to the streets, wearing sweats with frizzy hair. Fists in the air, chanting "ACK!" |
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Jan 18, 2018 18:39
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Piso Mojado posted:goth dog A yellow lab that desperately wishes it could be a black lab. |
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Jan 31, 2018 06:39
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Hugh Malone posted:I like that, like weird myths or benign habits that actually hurt/kill you... Fertility doc: "not every embryo will take, so we recommend implanting extras in addition to the customary +1, because last one in is a rotten egg" |
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Feb 18, 2018 20:38
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well, i was wrong. not only was today NOT pajama day at work like my new coworkers told me but the boss told me that there's no such thing as pajama day at this company. i was so embarrassed that i forgot to ask if tomorrow is actually cowboy day so i'm gonna get in early tomorrow and keep that costume in the car just in case |
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Feb 20, 2018 05:17
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ghost emoji posted:crisis tractor false farm operation |
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Feb 26, 2018 17:35
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sebmojo posted:Work snack idea: bag of flour it's deconstructed bread |
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Mar 9, 2018 22:25
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pianist at a piano bar who keeps mishearing the shouted out requests and playing deep cuts instead "play piano man by billy joel!" "allentown by billy joel? OK, here goes" "imagine by john lennon!" "glass onion by john lennon? love that beatles tune!" "can you play somewhere over the rainbow?" "mastodon's blood and thunder? there's no piano part in it but i'll give it a shot!" |
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Apr 16, 2018 17:43
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albany academy posted:Wanted poison! Got fish! Wtf! fugu if true |
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May 13, 2018 20:42
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Cubone posted:Tony Hawk's Pro Dater sempai noticed my 360 kickflip into nose slide! |
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May 26, 2018 20:23
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a couple who strike it rich with a 7 figure annual income from their lifestyle blog about tiny houses. they live large by building a massive tiny mansion with 950 square feet of floorspace. |
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Jul 21, 2018 22:16
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BLACK CHRISTMAS |
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Aug 23, 2018 23:13
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watching a YouTube video on how to do a self trepanation with a kit from Amazon to release the evil spirits in my skull |
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Nov 1, 2018 23:18
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make the thread bird teef |
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Nov 1, 2018 23:38
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got any sevens posted:other new year things dropped before we settled on the ball i really like the idea of the shape, but i don't think the wasp nest is the best idea |
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Jan 1, 2019 07:18
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| # ¿ May 11, 2024 23:03 |
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manero posted:An H.P. Lovecraft-themed yoga clothing store called Cthulhululemon unspeakable ancient horrors, high stretch lycra |
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Feb 5, 2019 04:09
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